porcelaindollcheryl

[porcelaindollcheryl]

jugheads cousin souphead

[porcelaindollcheryl]

nobody will be ready for when i make my fake script for a riverdale angels in america episode where its like one of the musical episodes but with random scenes and quotes from the play interspersed with a plotline of trying to get a community theater production of angels in america past the vile censorious riverdale council jughead is louis of course and kevin and veronica argue over if its more marketable to turn it into a musical and if ethel rosenberg should get to sing roses turn as roy cohn (hiram lodge) dies

[porcelaindollcheryl]

i live in my state as a silenced hidden ghost blog shadowbanned from the site for my insightful riverdale truths but i dont want to change this because i can forever go on thinking i am a waiting to be discovered big name riverdale blogger and that my mind and beliefs and jokes simply went unappreciated in their time as they are hidden from all but my most loyal of followers awake at the frightening hours i blog these missives to the world and do not wish to take away this shield to reveal my posts are still flops anyways we need more in depth archie comics scholarship..

[porcelaindollcheryl]

in many ways a huge oversight that they did not get christopher meloni to play the warden of leopold and loeb juvenile detention center like if i was in charge of riverdale i would have left soooo many pathetic pleading messages to get him on the show for like gay tv history and whatever he would have blocked my number and like he would have gotten an oddly homoerotic scene with hiram lodge and like it would have been tv HISTORY

#why am i advertising hbos oz on my riverdale blog idk im just crazy like that #whatever they could have tried to get lee tergesen too perhaps more apt #for archies transformation from middle class ideal to figure to which homoerotic violence is acted upon and which he enacts upon others #hi to the bestie if ur reading this on ur sparse dash

[porcelaindollcheryl]

if they really cared about cultural impact they would have done an homage to caveman archie comics themselves a flintstones ripoff while also referencing one of the great unsung works of the modern internet the klaine caveman fic where they struggle to explain what being gay is... truly could have been a life changing deployment of gay kevin when he was needed most and archie left in a homoerotic caveman society would understand himself fully as grug and oog also explored their own minds and each others bodies etc

[porcelaindollcheryl]

people posting gifs of jughead saying dipsy doodle as if that was just a random piece of made up slang and not actually an archie comics deep cut the name of a recurring jughead single page gag strip called dipsy doodles where jughead draws things on a canvas and then they become real the banana he drew is edible the rainclouds he drew create real thunder the average riverdale scholar has no clue the depths of archie comics deep cuts occurring on riverdale or the fact that this very understanding of the permeability of reality when jughead is involved is the textual origins of narrator jugheads nature within the jughead paradox... much to consider

[porcelaindollcheryl]

still sad in season 7 we didnt get like an episode themed more fully off of like an actual archie comic cuz the other weird and comic themed episodes were fun but i think they should have been trapped in like an eternal purgatory reenacting various simple archie comics plots as like an unending torture device they could not free themselves from you know like a groundhogs day type thing but its not exactly repeated simply very similar scenarios

[porcelaindollcheryl]

reading twelve cent archie the foremost academic text on archie comics im kind of obsessed realizing just how many extreme like archie lore deep cuts they mined for riverdale like this is not regular level comics knowledge this is serious business... i feel i am slowly training in like the wilderness to gain secret strengths and powers and return once again to riverdale and can view its semiotics with a clear vision

[porcelaindollcheryl]

the prototypical asexual male pairing is only for guys about whom reams upon reams of gay fanfiction have been written the kinds of things people have defended doctoral theses on homoeroticism in literature about and also jughead

[porcelaindollcheryl]

much to consider.. a pre riverdaleian riverdaleism (reading twelve cent archie)

[porcelaindollcheryl]

in many ways the heterosexualization of jughead can be traced back to 1974 and the premiering of happy days where the jughead figure the outsider his gluttony for food was replaced with a gluttony for bringing women back to his bachelor pad and in riverdale that exchange has been returned that what fonzie took from jughead is rejugheadified by making jughead a leather jacket wearing heterosexual who fucks (to imagine dragon songs)

[porcelaindollcheryl]

society if i rewatched riverdale but i think i need to find another person to get to watch riverdale.. ive gotten 3 people to watch it i need more

[porcelaindollcheryl]

remember when cheryls lesbian witch lizzie bordon coded ancestor who was burnt at the stake stole her body and nobody even noticed cuz all that was different was she said things like perchance a bit more and called a few more people witch burning hussies who dressed like harlots but tbh that could just be regular cheryl so nobody wanted to start shit over that

[porcelaindollcheryl]

whys jason older than cheryl if hes her twin i dont get what you dont understand he was born but she wasnt ready yet since she wasnt done eating their triplet in the womb so she stuck around for another two years many people do this

[porcelaindollcheryl]

all the photos of cole sprouse filming lisa frankenstein looks like hes the depressed lead of a high school production of sweeney todd not having fun at the cast party

[porcelaindollcheryl]

truly poetic cinema archie andrews came out of the metaphorical closet as the culmination of a decades long psychic battle of wills between one man and one company that he gained creative control over and then constructed an elaborate television show meditating on the nature of gay cinema and filled to the brim with references and intertextual engagement with the many places and faces of the decades of the glaad awards and finally in their final season when there were no more secret adopted third cousins from an obscure single publication archie comic that only existed in bob montanas basement to turn gay they rested upon their laurels and the glaad awards came to them and said thank you for your incalculable impact on the gay media landscape your name is now etched in our hallowed halls riverdale proud glaad award loser..

[porcelaindollcheryl]

wow riverdale got a glaad award nom for outstanding dramatic series this year and i didnt see a peep about it her contributions to gay television history are being written in stone acknowledged by the vile gatekeepers who would spit in her face truly how the world turns... dawsons creek and glee won so riverdale season 7 could lose but they did say her name just this once so whos really laughing

#someone should rig the vote for riverdale this will set of a cascading chain reaction #towards the critical reevaluation of riverdale as an avant garde queer cinema experience