plaidpyjamas

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Enki

#he #enki #funger

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fake idgafer, i saw you yearning

#SSSSHHH

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#durge

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There should just be a universal rulebook. Like for general life. Just want clear instructions so I can do everything right. Tell me what the secret is I know you have the manual Patrick I know it's in your truck Patrick

#hand it over Patrick

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Why are threats illegal let me speak

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when i block someone it should kill them

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enki

#him... #enki #funger

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sliding scale of posts about Jesus being a carpenter who was nailed to a cross

#ashdjdjjshsjs

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shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this

#meeeeee

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Man, I have a whole massive fic idea I will never write based around that sort of AU of Dark owning a club and doing favours for people like Lucifer.

It goes like something this: the reader (a modern day reincarnation of the original DA) is close friends with Mark (a modern day reincarnation of Actor, distinctly much more like Actor in personality and deeds than irl Mark). They go around having adventures, similar to the Van Videos.

Dark is not happy about this, but accepts that his DA is no longer his DA, and Mark isn't really quite Actor either, so he simply watches from the shadows. Possibly a little stalkery, but that's okay. He makes sure they know they can turn to him if they are ever in need. (Probably through creepily inserting himself into situations like with Date or Heist, so the reader isn't completely included to trust him at first.)

Well. They do get into a situation desperate enough need Dark's help, after Actor frames them and lets them take the fall for a murder he's committed. (Insert a whole undetermined subplot about Actor still wanting to be the hero of every story and being involved in a pact with the very same house entity all over again, leading to creepy supernatural shenanigans and said murder here.)

On the run and with nowhere else to turn, the reader seeks refuge at Dark's club. They make a deal that they can remain hidden and protected there, and they'll work for him in his club for as long as they stay.

If I were to actually write the fic to post, I think I would keep it toned down—just a club like Lucifer's, and the reader could work maybe as a bartender or the like. However, in the spicier iterations in my head, it's a fully fledged strip club, and the reader has no choice but to become a dancer there. Dark, being an entity of discerning tastes and with a reputation to uphold for his club, must first ensure they are up to his standard—resulting in the arrangement of the deal ending with the reader having to do a demonstrative strip tease for Dark whilst he inspects them and all their... assets.

Even better; flustered and embarrassed by this attention, they admit they've never really been with anyone before. This delights Dark, who had assumed from the way they followed around Actor like a lost puppy that there was a physical relationship there, but no, they were just pining and Actor was too self-absorbed to actually care about them in return. So Dark decides to stake his claim on them instead, revelling in the fact he's stealing something of Actor's right out from under his nose, and the reader is so angry and betrayed about being framed for the murder and tossed aside like trash after all they'd done for Actor that they're willing to go along with it too, part petty revenge, part being brokenly desperate for any comfort they can get.

Undetermined subplot would resume after this point; the reader working at the club whilst also trying to unpick exactly what happened with the murder and what Actor is up to so they can clear their name. Dark ends up working with them on the investigation, because he certainly wants to see Actor fall too, and they get closer and come to care for each other much more genuinely during the course of solving the case. Dark is impressed to find they're still as clever and determined and resourceful as the DA he once knew. He probably saves their life at some point, when they get in way over their head because of the whole supernatural house entity thing and need Dark's powers to rescue them.

But I've not thought through the details of that... unfortunately, writing plot and clever mysteries and murder investigations is not my forte. And, mainly, my brain is still stuck on the reader working/stripping at Dark's club, and doing sexual favours for Dark on the side because as the club owner—and their owner—he gets special privileges. >:)

ANON YOU GOTTA WRITE THIS COME ON - you could always start by just writing whatever scenes you already have in mind, don't worry about connecting them right away. It'll help you figure out how you want the plot to go/which arcs need to be moved/ changed, etc. And if that means you're just cranking out smut for a while then....oh nooo.... there will be more darkiplier smut in the world. Absolutely tragic! Lmao

Seriously though, this sounds like it'll make a great fic and I'm a little worried about posting this because I don't want to spoil it for anyone aaa

#really hope i made any sense there anon #I'm high and waiting for overwatch to update #dark anon #for real you should write this!!!!!!!

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(gets 0 notes on a post i made five seconds ago) sigh.... i see how it's.... (walks into the dark scary forest)

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In my experience, horror fans are by and large lovely people with a very healthy relationship to their genre of choice, but sometimes they fuck up and say something that in their ears sounds very affirmative of the movie of discussion and to everyone else sounds like the most sinister shit.

#horror is a great genre

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#holy shit it’s no kinks Kyle #<- prev #LMAO

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as always l The Oatmeal l ⬇txt-edited

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Gortash lives durgetash AU where Embrace Durge destroys the brain and then ends himself leaving Gortash alone as Archduke.

And Gortash in all his hubris just goes "dying? Nope."

And decides to use him to make a Watcher Assassin because he'll be damned if Durge is leaving him AGAIN.

#he also moves the mind archive interface back to his place #and puts durges head on it #so when hes not in the steel chasis he can be plugged into it and Gortash can still kiss his actual head. #<- incredibly fucked up im in sign me up #durgetash

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another dead enki 💜

#funger #enki #enki ankarian #fear and hunger #sketchbook bs #pen and ink #bbygirl treatment for my favorite chew toy

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These are late night thoughts but. Alright Gortash and DU drow didn't fuck. They never fucked. I'm not a Durgetash guy this is a Dorin home.

But did Enver wanna fuck that.

Is that his type.

Gortash specialists weight in.

#lmaooo #orin #gorty #durge