pheonixrylee-blog
Spiritual awakeming my journey o. what hapoened!
A look into my world my pain and comical side of all the shit that happens in my life!
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Lacrea
Listening to Lacrea i really love him i have done all-out of writing lately anyway i decited its time to do this for me and so i can tell everyone top go fuck themself amd just be happy and without one more attachment that's has to be tended everday....hopefully i cam get the help cause i cant do it alone to weak which sucks thats my problem i feel like i cant do alot of thingsby myself i feel like there is no reason. But if u have a driving force thats a dream or hope you can do it. And i still hd onto mine even though they seem faf away.. But i can do this..
Thats what i tell myself everymorning!!!
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Bitmojii app os my favortite anyway been kinda mia alot going on.managed to somehow make it threwthe last three days even thou i thought i wouldnt.just so tired of the same situation reolayi g itself its like a fucked up loop on repeat. Its crazy to me. I hate beimg stuck in the nothingness of the same situation iver and over i..ready to push past it but icamt keep doing that if i cant keep my emotions from.beimg messed with or my physical body beimg sick. Anyway i am about to tacklw.one of those rightnow well get my health back. Emotions idk they alwayss seem to stomped on i hope its not put on the co tiniouse loop it always is.. Anyway hope all are well!!
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Man do i miss you mom.. For everyone who dosnt know i lost her to a heart attack two years ago and went off the deep end she was my best friend doctors killed her
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Frustration
So my roomate thinks that whenever i make money its his and whenevwr he makes money ut us also his. I. The one that put in the effort to make money today and he just takes it and does not leave any for me not to mention he was just givin two hundred dollars as a gift from a stranger and i have zero dollars in mywallet....!! What if i wanted to buy something for myself he just bought new socks shoes power toold paid his gurlfriends rent like i would like to have twenty dollars for fucka sake..ugh super irriated
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People suffer because they are caught in their views. As soon as we release those views, we are free and we don’t suffer anymore.
Thích Nhất Hạnh (via purplebuddhaproject)
Amen
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Driving
Driving to the spot my heart place where i go to feel good the place where all my demon hide where they play the place noone understands but me this place can be so lonely yet so free i feel no pain once that tone of release comes none to tell me I'm wrong but my own mind that beats at me with no relent telling me i know better and why again.....
I silence the voices and just breath in..
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They say your addictions will kill you i say well life will to.......
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Good ole st.george utah afternoon stroll top run x some errands
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Emotions
So i never know what i feel or how i am feeling its a constant state of flux. I want to be stable and be sane but these drugs and feeling of emptiness keep calling my name. I have fallin into a diffrenr realm.things you would not understand feeling alone in the dark with noone to take my hand. Where are you when i need you most you are the shattered glass i walk upon and broken hopes. I scream in the night for a thief has stolen my heart.so cold so cold....i guesss i shall stay in the dark.
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