peppermints-and-lemon-zest

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Dude I am just like

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Gay & Lesbian Pride Parade, Seattle, Washington, 1991.

James May

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''Doesn't know what it's like to receive love''

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Currently making mac n cheese at my friends house and my friend just took one of the uncooked noodles and put in their mouth and said "I'm eating this one, boss" like a mafia member and then started crunching the loudest crunches of pasta I've ever heard and the entire time they were dead faced looking at me and then very painfully swallowed and I'm standing here laughing speechless

#no like seriously what #my friends are crazy #and the crunches were so loud

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Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

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I regret to inform you that Discord's new Terms of Service includes an arbitration clause. You can find it here https://discord.com/terms/#16. This clause includes an opt-out, which I have transcribed here:

You can decline this agreement to arbitrate by emailing an opt-out notice to [email protected] within 30 days of April 15, 2024 or when you first register your Discord account, whichever is later; otherwise, you shall be bound to arbitrate disputes in accordance with the terms of these paragraphs. If you opt out of these arbitration provisions, Discord also will not be bound by them.

These clauses are underhanded ways that corporations seek to deprive you of your right to participate in class-action lawsuits and your right to a jury trial. (This does only apply to us users ,other people still spread the word though )

#important info reblogs

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most important thing to remember about being a woman is if youre married you have to go under the covers with your husband and laugh cutely and play wrestle so when you die to progress the narrative he can remember it in slow motion montages

#i think id be a fantastic wife that lost her husband and has flashback montages of him going under the covers and laughing cutely

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I am terribly sorry to inform thee, mine faithful vassal, but twas I who sent that general to thine gates. New Dutchingham will have these lands, and I, their secret agent shalt never be found out. Thou wilt not live long enough to discuss mine plans with anyone else anyway, so I may as well tell thou as well that mine forces are on their way to the capital now, disguised as if the royal guard! Oh mine king shalt be very pleased indeed, and it will be such a shame that thou will never get a chance to see its gloriousness

my lord i fear i must inform you that you have reblogged a post made by the general whose forces encircle my fortress. please delete it posthaste

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I... dont...

I go to school for breakfast then I come home at noon and eat leftovers

If I ask nicely will people reblog this and tell me what their most common breakfast is? Not your favorite necessarily, just what you have for breakfast most frequently? 🙏🏽

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the walking polar bear gif is already one of my favourite gifs so can you imagine the noise I made when I saw this version

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Ugh, was having a great time mocking my recently imprisoned rival when I noticed the camera positioning makes it so that I appear behind the bars, thus framing me as trapped in a metaphorical prison of the narrative, now my whole day is ruined. Fuck.