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bashing my head against the wall thinking abt how all mitya’s acting out and unpredictable passion was truly a cry for attention (that he wasnt given as a child). bashing my head thinking abt how ivan not being able to understand how the suffering of children can ever be justified is bc of how he cant forgive anyone for the suffering HE was put through as a child. bashing my head thinking abt how alyosha’s faith was wounded severely when zosima died and began to rot bc he was his father figure and in his mind his decay could only mean that he was just as depraved as fyodor was. bashing my head thinking abt

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Hi! I love your blog. Thank you so much for taking the time to share your tips and advice! 🥰 I want to change my persona into a more bold and passionate lady instead of they shy timid girl. Do you have any recommendations on resources that I can start with? I would also love to learn how to flirt seductively to attract men but also to flirt with friends just for fun. Can you pls point me to the right direction? Thank you so much!! ❤️💓💗

Hi love! Thank you so much for your kind words and support. These words mean a lot to me <3

Yes, gladly. Sharing some resources below:

How To Validate Yourself & Stop People Pleasing

How To Master Your Shadow Self & Embrace Your Dark Feminine Energy (Advice)

How To Reduce Social Anxiety To Boost Your Confidence, Make Friends, & Become Magnetic

How To Master Public Speaking Anxiety & Communicate Like A Boss

How To Master The Written Word & Communicate Like A Queen

How Flirt With Men, Hold Your Own, & Embrace The Art of Seduction

How To Rediscover Yourself, Set Boundaries, & Master Interpersonal Conflict

How To Build Unshakeable Self-Confidence

Ways To Appear More Mature & Embrace Your Sensual Side

How To Handle Rude People & Insulting Comments With Class

Questions To Ask When Evaluating Your Relationships

A Beginner's Guide To Embracing Your Sexuality

Simple Tips & Tricks To Seduce A Prospective Lover

How To Build Steamy Sexual Tension With Any (Potential) Lover

Femme Fatale Booklist: Decentering Men, Feminist Dating, & Childfree Living

Essential Feminist Texts Booklist

Empowering Affirmations To Unleash Your Dark Feminine Energy

Hope these help xx

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25 Life Lessons I've Learned In 25 Years

In honor of turning 25 this month, here are some lessons I wish someone could've baked into my brain by 18. Hope this helps xx

Putting yourself first is not selfish, it is an act of self-care. Actively discounting others is not the same as protecting your peace.

Pay attention to who gossips and keeps to themselves amidst an interpersonal conflict. Insecure people or those in the wrong will speak the loudest and go on the longest in a fight to prove their innocence. Individuals who are self-assured and comfortable with the truth know it's better to communicate their feelings appropriately and then move past it. Confidence is assertive, tactful, and relatively silent.

If you want to know who to believe in an argument, pay attention to how both sides speak about the conflict. The perpetrator will often speak about the individuals' character/morality while the victim will explain their personal experience in the context of the relevant situation.

Display empathy and consideration, but don't live to satisfy others' emotional needs and expectations. Say farewell to anyone who dismisses or guilts you for your own needs, emotions, priorities/life goals & aspirations.

Your needs matter. No one needs to approve or validate your desires. If someone feels they have control over you or tries to persuade you to change your mind to ensure you put their emotions and needs first, cut them out of your life. They do not care about you.

Almost no one deserves insider access into your life and mind. Upholding your right to privacy – especially regarding your finances, dating life, health conditions/concerns, and long-term goals – is the simplest way to protect your peace.

A friend to all is a friend to none. Be wary of those who will not stand up for you behind closed doors. These people do not care about you, they care about what your place in their life does for them and their ego.

Be radically honest and accepting of who you are. Don't apologize for your preferences, aspirations, and values. You deserve to live in a way that makes you happy, not to appease others in hopes of their approval or future favors due to your karmic good deeds.

You deserve happiness, love, and nice things, life experiences, relationships, and opportunities in your life regardless of what others may or may not possess/ be able to experience. Dispel this scarcity mindset ASAP. Jealousy and internalized shame are destructive to your self-esteem and all your relationships.

You are worthy and offer many incredible, unique gifts to the world. Don't allow naysayers, critics, or bullies (of any age) to dim your light or sacrifice pursuing your dreams. Decide you're the leader of your own life. Then act accordingly.

Direct communication is always the way. Remain tactful, but at least when dealing with non-manipulative people, always say what you mean and say what you mean. It will save a lot of trouble and petty disagreements that could've been avoided with clearer communication.

You don't owe anyone an explanation for your feelings, emotions, and actions that don't have a direct, inescapable impact on someone else. "No" is a complete sentence.

Approach conversations as a meeting of the minds. Healthy debate or conflict is about seeking to understand the other person, not prove yourself right. Leaving your ego at the door will allow you to expand your mind and avoid many unnecessary conflicts or arguments.

If it's not a hell yes, it's a no. For a job, date, sex, attendance at a time-sucking social event, family gatherings, an informal meeting not essential for you to keep your job, a wedding, birthday party, holiday invitation, etc. Outside of your contracted hours and time necessary to keep yourself/your home clean & well-maintained, you should spend your time exactly as you please. Doing things you don't want to do will only breed resentment down the line toward yourself and others.

Detangle yourself from any who refuses to self-reflect and take accountability. This person is selfish and will never see you as fully human with emotions, needs, and a complete life/internal world of your own. Cut them out (or at least fully emotionally detach and limit contact with them) immediately.

Speak your truth, but always say a little less than you feel necessary. Overexplaning and oversharing do you no favors. At a minimum, this approach allows you to protect your peace. In the worst circumstances, this tactic can also save you from a lot of trouble in your personal or professional life.

Learn to ask for a little more than you're comfortable with, but do so with grace, tact, and confidence. Whether it's a salary/rate negotiation, flight/hotel/restaurant accommodations, get in the habit of making that slightly higher/up-leveled request like you're expecting a "yes." You can't get something you don't ask for, so speak up and show you know your worth. This habit can bring a lot of great opportunity into your life and builds up your confidence.

Everyone is on their own timeline and path. Don't compare yourself to others' credentials, job titles, relationship status, net worths, or jean sizes. Comparison is truly the thief of joy. Remaining envious of others only takes up the energy that could otherwise be used to elevate or enrich your life.

Become clear on your priorities, and remain diligent with your habits & routines. Set SMART goals. Implement healthy habits and rituals into your daily lifestyle. Be consistent with goal-supporting and wellness rituals (generous sleep schedule, healthful eating habits, daily movement/regular exercise, reading, task time-blocking, cleaning, and life/work admin schedule), so they become second nature. Help yourself by creating these default habits to ensure your brain is wired for success whether you're in an easygoing era or a stressful life season.

Stop seeing other people (especially other women) as your competition in your profession/dating life and within your platonic relationships. Use your immediate criticisms as a tool for self-reflection. Actively deconstruct the patriarchy in every aspect of your life. Other women coworkers, dating prospects, and friends are not your rivals nor individuals who should be evaluated based on their assertiveness, sexual history/appeal, relationship status, or desire to perform traditional maternal/domestic roles.

Understanding how to interact with others in a cordial, tactful manner is significantly more important than having everyone like you. Learn how to positively influence people without seeking approval. What other people think of us is none of our business. All we can do is show up as the best version of ourselves, and remain optimistic about a potential connection.

Acceptance, accountability, and consistent discipline are the holy trinity to creating a sustainable change that you can maintain for the long haul. There's no shame in starting from the bottom, but you need to be honest about where you're at, so you can create a realistic game plan/small behavior-changing habits that stack up over time to help you implement the radical change you're craving.

Let go of any internalized shame. Being the "good girl" does you no favors in life. Set a standard and expectation to be respected, not to be perceived as "innocent" or submissive – this is how you get taken advantage of in professional, platonic, and intimate relationships. Remain ravenous for respect. It's the only way to live life to the fullest.

24. Investing in your appearance is a form of self-respect. Wanting to look & feel your best and present yourself in the best light possible to others is not a superficial pursuit. Remain unwavering about your hygiene/beauty/grooming routines, deliberate styling choices, healthy eating & workout habits, and mindfulness of social graces. You're your #1 publicist, so act like it. Life is all about embracing satisfaction with a sprinkle of reputation management.

25. Be unapologetic about your financial ambitions, priorities, investments, savings goals, etc. Financial freedom IS freedom. The only way to change the system is to break it from the inside out. Leverage is everything. Allocate, and assert your (financial) power wisely.

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I’m

⚪️ living in the moment

⚪️ stuck on the past

⚪️ paranoid about the future

🔘 longing for a gorgeous immortal being with a horrifying backstory to turn me into his eternal partner so I can abandon all responsibilities and live away from society as we know it

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fanfiction writers are the best. when your favorite characters get killed off, messed up, or screwed over they just swoop in like

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Homer: I chose to focus on Achilles dragging Hector behind his chariot in my composition of the Siege of Troy as a meditation on the horrors men commit when consumed by grief and rage.

Alexander: At long last I have re-enacted the war crime of my hero Achilles from the poem That Time Achilles Did Some Really Fucked Up Things and Learned Better.

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can't for the life of me remember how to spell sisyphean, no matter how many times I write it. I have to look it up every time, and you'd think that would give me a chance of remembering it for next time, but no, brain retains none of it it's always back to square 1, no progress at all. it's like. like. idk i guess there isn't really a word for it.

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she/her? blocked and unfollowed.

what the hell

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me: i think i shall read some ancient philosophy today! let’s see what the stoic epictetus has to tell me

epictetus: look at you, you fucking piece of shit. you care about things? you’re sad when you lose them? what a fucking clown you are. oh your wife died and you’re sad about it? you’re sad about losing your wife you little peepee baby? fuck you. i hate you so fucking much

me: ok then!

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I could function in a society that had an actual nightlife that isn’t synonymous with just clubbing. Where are the night markets what if I want to go to the library at midnight

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Amore Kidnapped

— by Daniele Accossato

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Imagine my shock as a neurodivergent teen when I first realized that using large vocabulary and eloquent speech doesn't make you less likely to be misinterpreted, rather it adds an entirely new layer of misinterpretation I had never even realized existed in the form of people thinking you're being snobbish or condescending when you're just trying to be specific

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It’s rotten work but only if it’s you. When I do it for other people it’s fine, enjoyable even.

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Isabel Allende, The House of the Spirits