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AND I got up naturally today before 10 am. Win

Lmaoooo my pulsatile tinnitus is also gone since quitting Trintellix!!!!

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Lmaoooo my pulsatile tinnitus is also gone since quitting Trintellix!!!!

#watch me become one of those people that’s like #medications are evil uwu #I won’t but like fuck trintellix oh my god

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The line between anxiety and paranoia is a thin one and bro I cross it every day

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I decided to make an impulsive decision to completely stop taking my antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds because I increased the dose of them both a month ago and the side effects are so fucked. No way this could go wrong but like honestly I’ve been depressed and anxious my entire life and I’m used to it, meds have never helped that much so fuck it I might as well go back to my normal instead of being extremely fatigued, unable to feel other substances, nauseous, brain-fogged to the point I can’t comprehend an email, and full of acne and ALSO STILL not really not-depressed.

#bullshit bro #prob just go back on Wellbutrin at least I tolerated that pretty well despite it not seeming to help that much

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Fuck it I’m not meant to be sober nothing matters anyways and if I’m going to be unloved and incompetent and unlikeable my entire life I might as well feel good in the meantime

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I love how every time I relapse I justify it in my head like “I’m only 27. I’m still young. I’m allowed to have fun still” meanwhile it’s just me getting blackout drunk in my bedroom alone on a Saturday night

#every time lmao

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I GOT ANXIETY. THEY SAID THESE PILLS SHOULD HELP ME BUT I THINK THEY LIED TO ME MAFUCKIN MESS I DONT FIT IN SOCIETY FUCK MY SOBRIETY FUCK MY SOBRIETY

#KNOW I WONT PISS IN NO CUP #KNOW THAT MY LIVER IS FUCKED #where was Jessie murph when I was a 19 year old suicidal heroin addict seriously

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Had a nice dream and it made me aware of how fucking rare that is lmao. Seriously it’s always nightmares or vaguely off-putting and anxiety-inducing dream scenarios for me. I never get good dreams. What the fuck is that about

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That bitch is crazy, and yall gon have some ugly ass babies

#Jessie murph #man if I’d know about this song while I was breaking up with my abusive ass ex….if only……

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I love alternating between feeling so down on myself that I want to find heroin and relapse and/or drive really fast and risk killing myself one day and then feeling elated about where I’m at in life and feeling so proud of myself the next all based on external events that have like no significance outside of the overinflated meaning my brain creates. I love it!!!!!!!!!

#like yeah hi therapist well two days ago I wanted to die but today I’m great thanks for asking!!! no need for therapy until the next time I #feel rejected by people around me based off of nothing factual

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Wild thoughts of showing up where you at

With champagne and a Louisville bat

#this song is a masterpiece tbh #son of a bitch #jessie murph

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Jk I was just being self-destructive and depressed I’m better today yay

I should just abandon everything I’ve achieved in the last five years and go back to not making any money from amateur porn and doing heroin. Yeah

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I should just abandon everything I’ve achieved in the last five years and go back to not making any money from amateur porn and doing heroin. Yeah

#yeag

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I GOT THAT .38 SPECIAL I AINT NO FUCKIN BEGINNER!!!!!

#oh she fucks #jessie murph

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If this whole crazy episode is just because I’m PMSing I’m going to be so mad

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Seriously is this the trintellix or what I am not fucking having these feelings

#I’m not crying at 10 pm on a Monday night bro I have work tomorrow.

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I suppose there might be something else at play here

What is an aspiring stable and non-self-destructive bitch supposed to do when a song hits so good she wants to cut herself

#is this what antidepressants working is supposed to feel like?