ohioguru03

[ohioguru03]

Kids & Cell Phones...

Let me preface, what I am about to write is by no means easy, but it needs to be brought to the forefront when it comes to our children. Kids and cell phones go together about as well as an umbrella in the desert. 

We (ourselves) have created a society of people addicted to devices (phones, computers, video games, televisions, etc…). Some that were born into the technology era, have no idea that there is a beautiful world out there that doesn’t revolve around technology. 

Then, there is the rest of us that were born prior to the craziness of cell phones, the internet, social media, Netflix and for some even prior to cable. Many of us are stuck remembering a time that was much simpler but also liking some of the aspects of technology and the good it can do. 

Personally, there is a much larger part of me that longs for much simpler times. The question is “how to do it” in such a technology-driven society. 

We walk among so many people that are so distracted they are of little or no use to anyone else. Trust me, I’ve been there and though I’m extremely aware now, I can still slip into the dark hole of unlimited noise and information. 

I’m not writing this as “I want to debate,” I’m scribing this as someone that works /sees roughly 930 kids every day and how the cell phone (along with other technologies) is raising and destroying many of our kids. Many of us our blind to it, while others plead ignorance because phones allow adults “their time” when the kid is occupied and being raised by the phone (internet, social media, video games, etc…). How do I know? I’ve been there and know how easy it is to do. 

We are going to pay for this, and if you don’t see it yet, you will! Most of you have been blessed with the pure joy of having kids, but very few get to see 930+ per day. It’s bad...real bad! We can get into particulars at some point if you would like to grab lunch, but for now, I’m just the messenger giving you a heads up. 

Here is a short list of the ramifications of unsupervised (at times even supervised) technology usage. You will finds hundreds of studies linking technology (social media, video games, texting, streaming apps, etc...) to depression, anxiety, comparison, bullying, lack of interpersonal skills, and suicide. I don’t want to get too far down a rabbit hole as this is a post for another day, but I just encourage you to go do the research. Once you do your research and know the facts, then you can make your own judgment on just how dangerous technology can be especially for our children. 

Here is a list of 18 apps all parents should know about in 2022.

10 Ways to Protect Kids from Technology Traps

How to set up parental controls on all devices

Please, if you have children, do everything you can to educate/protect them/you on technology. Monitor it daily and…yes take it away from them when they aren’t upholding their end of the agreement. One thing I hear often from parents is kids are staying up to all hours of the night on devices and video games. Trust me, NOTHING good is happening. I would highly advise not allowing technology in their bedrooms at night. You want problems then allow technology in their room at night. 

Trust me, I know, it takes work to set rules and parameters but it will be worth it in the end. You will be the “mean parent,” and that’s okay. Wear it as a badge of honor. Again, you would rather be the “mean parent”  than deal with some of the repercussions of unlimited technology usage. I see the damage done daily! 

Let’s be real for a second, cell phones have little place in a school building (emergencies I guess), but for the most part that is absolutely not what they are being used for. Do you know how difficult it is for a child to learn and engage with others when they are constantly giving more attention to and being distracted by their device. 

Giving kids a cell phone before they are mentally mature enough to handle one is like giving an alcoholic free drinks and expecting everything to end well. IT’S CRAZY! Furthermore, as adults WE are often not mature or disciplined enough to handle technology. The nonsense needs to stop and I don’t care if every other kid has one. If so, find a different circle of like-minded people.  

I hope you can see my heart and passion in my words. This is something I’m incredibly passionate about because I see the daily destruction from a wide perspective. Technology, left unsupervised, has an incredibly high chance of destroying our children (physically, emotionally, socially). Our children are too precious and valuable for me not to send out a warning. 

Listen, if I were over exaggerating for a few clicks then shame on me, but I can assure you this is not what I’m doing. I don’t give a rip about clicks, but I sure do care a whole lot about allowing/paving the way for our kids to be kids again.

WE have to do better!!! 

[ohioguru03]

Kids These Days

After reading the title of this post, I’m guessing you will be a bit surprised where this heads. This is something I’m EXTREMELY passionate about and is very near and dear to my heart. 

If you don’t know, I’m an educator.

If we want to see change, we first need to recognize we need to change. I want to preface, this is NOT in any way a personal attack on anyone, but rather a we need to wake up as a society to ALL of us! 

You hear all the time “kids these days have changed, they are so disrespectful, they are so this or so that.”

In some cases, that may be true, but kids didn’t change, the “adults” in this country have changed. We, as adults, need to take ownership over what we have created and allowed.

Kids learn behavior through what they see and hear. Don’t blame the kid…blame us!

Here’s are a few thoughts from 30,000 feet:

1.) A lot of kids have never been told ”no.”

2.) We give kids too many choices and allow them to dictate every second of our schedules. We often want to live vicariously through our children.

3.) Technology is raising a lot of kids (spoiler alert: won’t end well).

4.) As adults, we still want to behave in childish ways and be the focal point of our families instead of guiding, leading, and directing our families.

5.) We have helicopter adults and completely absent adults.

6.) Kids will do what we as adults will allow. It’s simple. 

7.) We have our kids chasing scholarships, money, titles, status, power, & popularity while neglecting honor, integrity, loyalty, respect, and doing what’s right.

8.) We continue to lower expectations. Instead of allowing children to rise to the standards/expectations, we continuously lower the bar. Life isn’t easy, and yet we set them up for failure by not allowing them to be challenged or face adversity.

We can keep passing the buck and seeking solutions that we are never going to find. Truth be told, if we want to see something different (no matter what aspect of life), it needs to start in the “home.” Until we get back to the “home” being the most positive, influential places in our children’s lives, we will continue to place the blame in all the wrong directions.

With Love,

Kurt

[ohioguru03]

Taking Ownership

I was listening to a podcast earlier while cutting the grass, and there were a lot great points but one in particular hit me like a Mike Tyson right hook (not on an airplane). 

“You will never be able to lead yourself as long as you lie to yourself.” -Craig Groeschel

This was me for so, so many years. Let’s be clear, I now recognize these things in myself more than ever but I’m still a work in progress. 

I can frame it however I would like to make myself feel better whether I call it self deception, turning a blind eye, not wanting to confront the issues, blaming others and not taking ownership, or just good ol’ ignorance. All of which fracture many aspects of our lives. 

I’m sure someone smarter than me has said something similar, but I know it’s impossible to change what we won’t confront. 

Three additional takeaways from Craig’s Leadership Podcast

Growth and comfort never coexist.

What is easy is rarely right.

What we do in private always influences how we lead in public.

My Big 3:

1. Reactive to Proactive

2. Passive to Assertive

3. Failed/lack of communication to effective communicator  

As I mentioned above, I’m still a work in progress but these are the 3 that I’ve pinpointed thanks to God’s clarity. The word/phrase on the left are ways I would detail some of my biggest flaws for a lot of my life, BUT the word/phrase on the right is where I’m headed. 

[ohioguru03]

Baptisms...got me thinking!

Meeting with fellow believers and the body of Christ on Sundays (or Thursdays) is essential for the Christian. Listening/putting into practice the words our pastors allow God to speak unapologetically through them is essential for the Christian.

However, there is nothing quite like the personal testimonies behind baptisms. The impact of personal testimony in regards to the life-changing power of Jesus Christ is undeniable. We can debate theology all day long, but there is no debating the eternal change that happens when we surrender our life to Christ.

And this is the testimony, that God gave us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. -1 John 5:11

I've watched people trying to change/trying to be good enough on their own and there may be some progress, but heart change is only found in Christ. I have my own personal testimony, which I've shared many times, but I've seen countless others go from death to life thanks to a personal relationship with Jesus. I would not bear false witness. I have seen crazy and unexplainable changes in others. Trust me, it didn't come from a self-help book or willpower.

And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved not their lives even unto death. -Revelation 12:11

I had a person approach me one time (some years ago) and he said "my son was talking about you the other day and said Dad he is definitely not the same guy I remember. There is something way different about him."

For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. -Titus 3:3-7 

I can take absolutely zero credit for any change that has happened to me over the last 14 years. Trust me, prior to that I tried a lot of different things to change and be good enough (newsflash: all FAILED). 

But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, -1 Peter 3:15

The Lord is still working on me daily. I still have areas of my that fall well short of God's Glory. I know this is always going to be the case as a sinful person, but I'm open to allowing God to work in those areas.

My mouth will tell of your righteous acts, of your deeds of salvation all the day, for their number is past my knowledge. With the mighty deeds of the Lord God I will come; I will remind them of your righteousness, yours alone. O God, from my youth you have taught me, and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds. So even to old age and gray hairs, O God, do not forsake me, until I proclaim your might to another generation, your power to all those to come. -Psalm 71:15-18

Remember, we have trouble changing the laundry let alone changing our hearts. 

[ohioguru03]

History of St. Clairsville Football

Growing up in the Ohio Valley, specifically St. Clairsville (OH), in the 1980s and early 1990s, there was football season and waiting for football season. The Red Devils, under the legendary George Strager, terrorized the competition in the 1980s. 

The Red Devils opened the 1980s with a pair of (7-3) marks in ‘80 and ‘81.

St. Clairsville finished 3rd in 1982 in Division 3, Region 11 after finishing (8-1-1). At that time, Ohio only took two teams from each region to the playoffs. The Belmont County seat finally broke through in 1983 following a (9-0-1) regular season record, which landed Strager’s team in the No. 2 spot in Region 11. St. Clairsville would shutout top-seed Columbus St. Charles (12-0) in its first-ever playoff appearance. The following week the dream season ended to Urbana (22-0). 

After a two-year stint in D3, St. Clairsville returned to D2 for the1984 and 1985 seasons. The 84′ campaign saw yet another (7-3) with the Red Devils losing its fourth opener to Bellaire in five seasons. 

1985 may have been one of St. Clairsville’s best teams in school history. The Red Devils finished the regular season with an unblemished (10-0) mark. St. Clairsville pitched four shutouts, and gave up just 58 points the entire season. Bellaire (10) and Martins Ferry (28) were the only two teams to score more than 8 points. All told, the Red Devils averaged 34 points per game on offense while allowing just 5.8 ppg. Unfortunately, none of that mattered, as the Red Devils finished 5th in a loaded Division 2, Region 7. What’s worse, this was the first year that 4 teams from each region made the playoffs. 

Then, the season that changed everything. The fall of 1986 was a year diehard Red Devil fans will never forget. George Strager’s team captured the attention of the entire Ohio Valley behind its dynamic duo of Shawn Vincent and John Spencer. St. Clairsville made the state semifinal in 1983 behind Vincent’s brother Joey, but this was a different. In 83′, the Red Devils needed to win just a single game to advance to the Final 4. In 86′, Strager’s team made the 200-plus mile trip to play No. 1 in the state Ironton in the opening round. In addition, the game was played in a monsoon. The Red Devils prevailed (29-14). The following week at Dover, St. Clairsville dispatched Orrville behind two scores from Vincent and a 56-yard scamper from Spencer. 

The magical run ended the following week at the Akron Rubber Bowl thanks in large part to two controversial spots. The Red Devils scored all 21 points in the 2nd quarter and held a 21-10 lead at intermission. Chagrin Falls Kenston would score the final 12 points. Junior quarterback Mike Dinallo scored from a yard out with 25 seconds remaining to give Kenston a 22-21 lead. Dinallo connected with Tony Rhea on a 69-yard pass setting up the go-ahead score. Ironically, if Shawn Vincent doesn’t run Rhea down, the Red Devils may have still won the game. Vincent connected with Spikey Johnson on a pass play that ended at the Kenston 20-yard as time expired. 

One of the most disappointing things, besides my Dad already booking his hotel room in Columbus, the Red Devils never got the chance to have a showdown with C.A.P.E. in Ohio Stadium. The Cincinnati Academy of Physical Education featured future Ohio State Buckeye stars Carlos Snow and Vinnie Clark. C.A.P.E. would go on to beat Kenston (7-6). You will never convince my Dad, St. Clairsville wasn’t beating C.A.P.E. 

The Red Devils would lose plenty to graduation especially if you consider 85′ and 86′, but “tradition never graduates” was the saying in Belmont County. Strager’s final season was a (7-3) campaign. Following consecutive wins over rival Bellaire, the Red Devils would fall yet again to the Big Red in 87′. However, Strager’s bunch would rebound winning its next 6 allowing just 36 points. Unfortunately, the Strager era would close with back-to-back losses at Coshocton (20-13) and on the home field to Cleveland Central Catholic (14-6). 

A New Era

Following Strager’s retirement, St. Clairsville would hire long-time assistant Mike Young to take over the program. The Young era began with a bit of a rocky start in 1988 losing its first three games to Youngstown South, Bellaire, and Weir (WV) before getting a (13-7) triumph in Wintersville in Week 4. Rival Martins Ferry was next, and Purple Riders sent the Red Devils to (1-4) with a 15-8 defeat. Cambridge would be next, and the Bobcats escaped with a (14-12) edge. Sitting at just (1-5), many of the large Red Devil faithful were questioning if this was the right hire. Coach Young’s team, led by a talented group of juniors and sophomores, closed the season with four consecutive wins by a combined score of 110 to 13. 

The ending to 88′ season catapulted the Red Devils into the fall of 1989 where the Red Devils would once again make the OHSAA playoffs. Remember, in the 1980s and 1990s it was a HUGE deal to make the playoffs especially for a team from the Ohio Valley. 

As I’m typing this out, I’m continuously taken back in time. I love nostalgia and romanticizing the past. I wish I were a little older to completely realize the magnitude of what was happening along with experiencing the sights, sounds, and feelings with the rest of the hyped-up community. 

The 1989 slate started off with a bang. The Red Devils traveled to West Virginia powerhouse Brooke and took down Bud Billiard’s Bruins (7-3) in front of a capacity crowd. The St.C trains next stop was a Saturday afternoon meeting at Nelson Field with the Bellaire Big Reds. The Big Reds featured senior Joey Galloway (anyone know what happened to him?). The Red Devils rolled (27-14) setting up a meeting with Union Local at the Belmont County Fair. St. Clairsville last played UL in the 1975 season finale, a 38-0 Red Devil victory. To this point, St. Clairsville was 11-2-1 against the Jets. Needless to say, this was a huge game for Jake’s Jets. 

The 1989 “Fair Game” was a game I was never able to forget. My cousin was dating one of UL’s star defensive players (Greg Cirudi) who never let me forget “22-21.” Union Local had pulled off a shocker, which wasn’t the first time. The other OV team to make the playoffs that year was Shadyside, and guess who beat them? Yep, UL! 

St. Clairsville bounced back with a win over Claymont, but then fell at home the following week to rival Martins Ferry (22-8). Strangely, the only thing I remember about that Ferry game is playing on the hill next to the home side bleachers (St.C kids know what I’m talking about). Martins Ferry would finish 5th that season and just miss the playoffs. 

The Red Devils wouldn’t lose again until a (27-6) season-ender to Ironton in a Regional Final game played at Athens’ Pedon Stadium. Ironton, after losing in the 1988 title game to Akron SVSM 14-12, would go on to capture the 89′ state title behind a vaunted running game led by Heath Brownstead (Marshall), Delandual Conwell (Kentucky), and quarterback Craig Pleasant (Morehead State) with a fierce offensive line which included J.D. Cyrus and J.D. Coffman, both of whom played at Marshall. 

Brownstead carved up the Red Devil defense for 176 yards and 3 TDs and Conwell added 102 on just 14 carries. In all, Ironton racked up 312 stripes on the ground, while St. Clairsville was only able to muster just 153 yards for the game which included a mere 37 in the 2nd half. 

Prior to the Ironton loss, St. Clairsville won the first and only (to my knowledge) playoff game played outside of Ohio. The Red Devils defeated Dover (6-0) at Wheeling Island Stadium (WV). Interesting note from this game, we had scheduled my 9th birthday party at the Ohio Valley Skate Center for Saturday, November 4 which happened to be the day St.C played Dover. We proceeded with the birthday party and my Dad went to the game. Looking back, it was a solid play by him. 

St. Clairsville finished the 1980s with the following:

Record: 81-24-2

Playoff Appearances: 3

Playoff Record: 4-3

Losing Seasons: 0

Record vs. Bellaire: 4-6

Record vs. Martins Ferry: 7-3 (7-straight wins 81-87)

Fools Gold

The 1990s started out with much of the same. St. Clairsville dominated much of the 90′ season with the exception of a heartbreaking loss at home to Brooke in the opener (19-14). I’m not 100 percent on this, but I believe the Bruins finished in the Top 25 nationally. Coach Young’s super talented senior class helped lead the way to 9-straight wins by an average of nearly 24 points per game. Unfortunately, the Red Devils finished in a tie for 5th with Brookfield in the computer points. The top 4 in Division 3, Region 9 were Youngstown Mooney, Mentor Lake Catholic, Wickliffe, and Youngstown Ursuline. 

The unfortunate thing about the 1990 team was it was better than the 89′ team. Kids today will never understand having to go (10-0) to make the playoffs. Bottom line, St.C beats Brooke and the Red Devils make the playoffs in consecutive seasons for the first time in school history. Though, 10-0 didn’t guarantee a spot (see 85′). 

This is where I insert myself into the story. In the summer of 1991, one of my best friends asked me if I would like to be a manager with him for the 91′ season. Was there any other answer than “absolutely?” To say I was stoked was an understatement. 

The scuttle around the 91′ team was a mixed bag. Of course the expectations were high. It was St.Clairsville. However, there was some uncertainty around the team. The ELECTRIC Willie Heath’s status was uncertain heading into August camp. Heath’s speed was breathtaking. He was also a tremendous baseball player. Furthermore, standouts Jason Games, Jason Davenport, and Bill Snyder were sidelined for the campaign.

Regardless, expectations were still extremely high especially if you asked a 5th Grade Kurt Stubbs. The season started on a high note with the Red Devils capturing their 3rd straight win over Bellaire. This one took place on a sun-drenched Saturday afternoon at Nelson Field. Brian Schrickel took the first play from scrimmage 56 yards for a St. Clairsville TD and the county seat rolled to a 29-12 victory. 

Next up, was pesky Union Local at the annual Belmont County Fair. St. Clairsville ripped the Jets in 90′ by the count of 36-0, but no such outcome would occur this time around. UL pulled its second upset (12-11) of StC in three seasons. Making matters worse, quarter Brian Schrickel was injured on a brutal hit from Brian Delloma. 

Coach Young would hand the keys over to freshman Marty Lucki, which was absolutely unheard of in 1991. Trust me! Remember, the part of the story where one of my best friends asked me to be a manager? That was Lucki’s brother, Matt. I was close by throughout Marty’s career and to be moved up to the varsity as a frosh in 1991 came with plenty of backlash from not only kids but parents and community members. I give Coach Young a lot of credit for making the move. Lucki was one of the most dominant junior high players you would ever see, and looked like a grown man before entering high school. 

With Schrickel injured, Lucki would get the start on the road at Edison South. The Red Devils secured a 17-0 victory. The following week, Lucki looked even more comfortable in a 22-8 win over North Marion (WV). 

Little did anyone know, the next week would change the course of St. Clairsville football for nearly 16 years. The Red Devils came into its showdown with Martins Ferry at (3-1) and the game was at home. 

This is one of those games I can remember vividly from my ballboy position. St. Clairsville was dominating this game and with Lucki at QB the Red Devils appeared to have a star in the making. Finally, after many, many years, the Red Devils had a rifleman under center. Lucki connected with junior Greg Hilling for the 1st TD of the game then later hit junior Steve Schafer for a big gainer. Later on the drive, senior Eric Keller picked up a huge 4th down and then Lance Rice capped off the drive with a TD run. 

Early in the 4th quarter, Lucki led St. Clairsville on a 6-play 79-yard drive where the freshman ran like a man possessed with runs of 23 and 29 yards on the drive. The 29-yarder ended with another St.C 6-pointer. I can remember Lucki just refusing to go down on those runs. 

St.Clairsville led 22-7 with 7:53 to play.

262 Seconds Changed a Generation

Ferry quickly answered when Josh Lucas hit Richie Speilvogel for a 69-yard TD. This may be a little off, but I remember free safety Danny Hutchinson running into a teammate and Speilvogel split the two. To me, this was the play that changed it all. If we get Speilvogel on the ground at midfield, I believe we win this game. 

We didn’t and it only got worse. The very next possession, Lucki was drilled by John McFarland and the ball bounced perfectly into the hands of Mikale Roby who raced it into the end zone. Lucas hit Erik DelGuzzo. 

Could it get worse? Yep! St.Clairsville got the ball back and Lance Rice fumbled on the St.C 25-yard line after appearing to pick up the 1st down. Just a few plays later, Keith Walker scored from 6 yards out with 3:31 remaining. 

Ferry had the lead and not many Rider fans were left to view it. The Purple Riders ended the game with another TO as Speivogel ended any St.C hopes with an INT. 

The Red Devils were (3-2) with a lot left to play for, but the swagger was gone. The mystique around the St.Clairsville football program was gone in 262 seconds. 

The following week St. Clairsville made the long trek to Holmes County to take on West Holmes and just got physically destroyed. Players were literally getting their face masks broke. The Red Devils fell 28-7 and then came home the following week and got shutout 28-0. It was telling that we never recovered from the Ferry comeback. 

The next two weeks St.C couldn’t get over the hump losing a (16-13) nod at Claymont before losing (14-13) at home Meadowbrook. The season did end on a high note as Schrickel returned to QB in his final high school game. Eric Keller buried a game-winning FG as time expired for a (24-21) win to finish a disappointing year at (4-6). 

Expectations were off the charts once in 1992, but refer back to the 91′ Ferry game. St. Clairsville had a group of tough seniors returning along with a massive offensive line featuring mainly juniors. 

[ohioguru03]

A Lesson from Cal...and my Dad

It's hard to fathom yesterday was the 25th Anniversary of Cal Ripken Jr. surpassing Lou Gehrig's 56-year-old record of playing in 2,130 consecutive games. Many thought this record would never be broken and now Ripken's untouchable mark stands at 2,632 games in a row. Most records will likely be broken, but I'm 99.999999% sure this will never, ever be touched. The younger generations can't even wrap their head around the magnitude of this accomplishment. 

There are many reasons I don't believe this record will ever be sniffed, but mostly because they don't make guys like this anymore. For perspective, Kansas City Royals 2nd basemen Whit Merrifield is the active leader at 290 consecutive games which means if he plays in every game for the next 14 years he will have a chance. 

I parallel this to my life and the example that was set forth to me by my Father. He never received the accolades or notoriety of a Cal Ripken Jr., but I would argue his numbers were every bit as impressive.

Hour-after-hour, day-after-day, week-after-week, and year-after-year I watched him go to work after eating a bowl of Total each morning for 36 consecutive years. He worked 35 years at one job and then 12 at another. I can't recall him missing work or heck even taking a lunch break. 

This isn't cliche: he was the manager and was first to arrive, last to leave, and always cleaned the toilets (lead by example). Countless times receiving calls in the middle of the night for someone who needed a part and he would get dressed and head into the store. The standard that was set is you always over-deliver! He didn't do all this for exposure, fame, or someone to post about him on social media, he did it for the same reason Cal Ripken Jr. did it...it's your job and that's the expectation! 

You don't need awards for showing up and doing your job! In a world full of average, these two were all-time greats at their respective jobs. One was an MLB Hall-of-Famer the other was a manager at NAPA and an Operations Manager for Quality Environmental Service. Be great wherever you are at!

[ohioguru03]

24-Hour Shutdown!

Let me start by mentioning this, what I’m about to discuss wasn’t some heroic act or great sacrifice, so don’t get it twisted. I simply wanted to journal through this time to see what came to mind.

Earlier in the week I noticed on social media our church (Grace Fellowship) was doing a shut-it-off Wednesday (all technology). I immediately thought, “hey, I’m in!” 

I woke up on Wednesday, turned off the phone, checked to see what my workout was for that day then turned off the computer, and the only television that was on featured Hudson’s Blue’s Clues. 

When I turned my phone off the first thought that came to mind was a barrage of “what ifs.” Quickly, I heard a still, small voice say something to the affect of “trust me, I’m greater than your what ifs.” 

The mind is funny as it will start giving you all the reasons you should power back on, but at the same time, it will give you all the reasons you shouldn’t work out today. 

It’s amazing that technology has become part of who we are...When the brain/mind senses relaxation or downtime it immediately is searching/reaching for our phone. You know what I’m mean, right? 

Think about this...how many times have you been texting or scrolling through social media on your phone, checking email or doing work on your computer, and watching Netflix on the television all simultaneously? Some of you above average performers may even have the iPad out or listening to music on another device as well. Friends, this is ridiculous and should not be. Kurt Stubbs, you can go ahead and be the first to take your own advice. 

Before I get to the major stuff, I want to say this was refreshing time but not quite long enough. The next time I get a week or so when I have no work requirements, I’m going to shut it all off for at least seven days. I’m sure my journal entries will be much larger. If God allows it, I hope you will join me when the time comes. 

Alright, enough of the introduction, let’s get to the heart of things. 

Big Takeaway

I was able to do a lot of things yesterday with zero technology. Hudson and I took our morning walk. I worked out and hiked in the woods. Dana and I were able to enjoy watching, playing, and spending time with Hudson. I was able to begin reading another book and spend some quiet time with God. This is what came to me...

We don’t like hard! We like comfort and distractions. 

In moments of silence, our actual reality comes storming to the forefront. Hence, why we drown ourselves in work, busyness, or ya know...scrolling through social media. Perhaps, you are nothing like me, but I know from personal experience it’s much easier to get lost/distracted in some sort of busy work or scrolling endlessly through meaningless social media posts then to confront issues we have in our life. In addition, most of us fear our thoughts when we are still, silent, and it’s completely quiet. Try to sit in complete silence for five consecutive minutes and let me know how it goes. Though, 2 Corinthians 10:5 says we are to take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ.” 

Therefore, we can’t control what pops into our mind, but The Lord has given us a blueprint to battle each thought. We don’t have to be afraid of the quiet, because God has given us weapons for the battlefield of our mind. The Bible has much to say about thoughts, thinking, and what we should be thinking about. 

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. -Philippians 4:8

Scrolling through our phone or the computer is like sitting in a rocking chair...it passes time but ultimately you didn’t go anywhere. There are many reasons we stay distracted by technology (possibly another post in itself), but I truly believe one of the biggest reasons is that it takes us away from reality. Often times, our reality isn’t quite what we want it to be, so it’s just much easier to get lost in a fantasy world. Yes, I said it...social media is a fantasy world (90% of it isn’t real). 

Moving Forward

I reluctantly turned my phone back on this morning. To be honest, I didn’t want to. In a perfect world, I could easily say goodbye to all technology. However, our world makes it really hard to do so. Everything revolves around being connected (emails, text messages, interacting with family, directions, marketing etc etc) to our technology. 

I love technology in some regards. It can be great to promote encouragement, lifting others up, kindness, and just to stay connected with loved ones that I don’t often see. However, as great as it can be, technology can be evil just as well. There is so much garbage out there. People slandering each other (most times people they don’t know or have never met), arguing, tearing each other down, and creating even more divide in an already divided world. The social media world can be an awful, awful place to spend too much time. Again, this a topic for another day. 

Let me finishing by noting this. When I turned my technology back on, I had nearly 70 text messages and several emails. I can honestly type that not one, not a single text or email was of great importance that required an immediate response. 

Final Thought

We (myself included) spend so much of our time wasting it on useless things that bring absolutely little to no value to our lives or the lives of others. I want us (myself included) all to think about this...how much of our time spent using technology (not work related) adds real value to our lives or the lives of others? How much of that time is spent looking at things that enrich us or others? Is what we are spending our time on going to have any lasting or eternal impact?

With Love,

Kurt

[ohioguru03]

The Journey

There is a saying that life is a journey, and those words couldn’t be truer over the course of the past five months.

My wife Dana and I decided to get healthy at the start of 2020. Right now, some of you may be asking, didn’t I read something similar to this a couple years ago. Yep, sure did!

Let me rewind for a second before I fast forward to present day. In April of 2018, I had ballooned to 202 pounds which was six pounds less than my heaviest of 208. I was feeling terrible mentally each time I would look in the mirror and see my gut continuing to grow. My pants were quickly becoming spandex. I had to suck in each time I put a pair of pants on.

(April 2018, around 202 pounds)

As most of you know, working out has never been the issue for me rather it’s the kitchen aspect. If I didn’t workout I’m not sure what my weight and body fat would’ve been. Simple answer...high! 

Alright, well, it was early May of 2018 and I began crushing workouts and eating far less (like way less). I started cutting foods out left and right, and just eating less overall. I had done this a few times before, so somewhere in the back of mind I knew this wasn’t sustainable but I was seeing results. However, as the weight and waist line dropped so did my my muscle mass because I wasn’t taking in nearly enough food (you will hear about this in a bit). At some point, during the fall of 2018, I had dropped to around 168 pounds from 202 (originally 208). I had quite a few people tell me I needed to put on some weight or don’t lose anymore weight. I always chalked that up to haters gonna hate ;)

To be honest, over the next several months from the fall leading up to the birth of our son Hudson (March 28, 2019) I can’t recall much of what took place. I remember in the days we spent at the hospital I was snacking quite a bit, which began a slow fade. It truly was a slow, methodical fade! 

It was like a snowball rolling down hill, I couldn’t seem to stop it. I continued to workout 4, 5, and 6 times a week, but I wasn’t able to out work my poor eating decisions. Every Monday I would start with great hope, but by Monday night or Tuesday I was right back in the cycle of bad habits. I think brother Paul sums it up best...

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. -Romans 7:15-17

This is exactly how I felt almost every waking hour trying to control this beast! At work, I would start out the day well, but as the day moved on I would find myself bored/stress eating whatever you want to call it. I don’t know what your go to is, but mine is crackers and pretzels (anything dry and salty). On the surface, not the worst food you can eat, but when you take small hand fulls over-and-over it becomes a problem. Unfortunately, most of this occurred for me after I had settled in for the night (slow metabolism). You know nothing says post workout like some Cheez-Its or peanut butter-filled pretzels from Costco with a protein shake. Let me be clear, throughout the day I wasn’t void of bad foods. I would grab a donut in the teacher’s lounge, a piece of cake or pizza in the office, and over time that adds up. It wasn’t every day, but it was enough to get the waist line moving in the wrong direction. 

Boom...just like that I went from 168 in the fall of 2018 to 206 pounds in December of 2019. This picture below looks like (or maybe it doesn’t) that I’m carrying the 206 pounds better than reality. As I mentioned above, it was a slow fade and it just felt like I couldn’t stop the bleeding. Can you relate? 

(December 2019, around 206 pounds, but the kid is the stinkin’ cutest!)

Toward the end of December, Dana began talking about this “Faster Way to Fat Loss” program she wanted to try and was hoping I would jump in with her. My sister had done the program in the past to some degree and got some amazing results. Long story short, I hesitantly said yes partially because I wanted to be an encouragement on her journey so I said what the heck let’s do it! Little did I know, this program would change the way I view eating and give me the tools for sustainability. 

Let me start by saying this, I’ve known for quite some time the difference between healthy foods and garbage. That was never the problem.

“I knew what to eat, but I never knew how to eat.”

Prior to us starting on January 4th, this was my game plan for losing weight. I would workout even harder and eat less, which as I came to find out was completely wrong. You know like Bob Uecker said in Major League, “just a bit outside!” Did it work? Sure, for awhile. Was it lasting? Nope, never! You know they say the definition of insanity is...nevermind you’ve read that a 1,000 times. 

I was so overwhelmed when we started the program as they talked about counting macros, eating whole foods etc. I dabbled with macros for like two days once, but this time I had to get serious and get down to bitness! However, somewhere in the back of mind I thought we would flame out after a week or two.

The first week we didn’t count macros, but basically ate three meals of whole foods and cut out gluten/dairy (I cut out gluten/dairy for the first 6 weeks). Oh, and there was this other thing...intermittent fasting. When we started the program (January 4th, 2020), my lunchtime at school started at 10:40 a.m. which is when I would break my fast. I would eat until 6:30 and then be done until the next day at 10:40 am. To be honest, this wasn’t as bad as I expected once I got dialed in and started to educate myself (Side note: we’ve done this every day for the past 210 days). Our usual window since not being in school is about 9:30 am to 5:30 pm. 

Week 1 went by and it was a bit challenging because eating whole foods meant I completely rid myself of all the garbage/useless food I was consuming. Starting week 2 we began counting our macros and inputting the data into MyFitnessPal. At first, it was somewhat overwhelming, but let me assure you that it got easier as I became more familiar with the app, counting macros, and what foods worked for me to hit my numbers. Heck, you can even give your friends a thumbs up or an encouraging comment on the app. 

The first week I was struggling to rid myself of old habits. I was leaving like 30-50 carbs on the table each day, because I thought that was beneficial. Our coach (Rachel), advised me not to do that and to make sure my Carbs, Fats, and Proteins were plus or minus 10 each day to my target numbers. For example, if I got 277 carbs for the day, I was only eating about 230-240 thinking I would lose more weight doing that while working out. Again, as I continued to educate myself, I realized I needed to trust the process and not my ignorance.

I can’t pinpoint the exact date, but somewhere in the week 3 or 4 range I began to get more-and-more comfortable and find a groove. It was becoming easier to look at that donut, cake, or pizza at school, and say no, because I have a purpose and mission that I am on. There were times when I would see someone eating something I may enjoy, and I had to keep telling myself “you are different, you are disciplined, you are made to do this.”

My biggest advice after 210 days of this journey is to keep the process simple.

Faster Way to Fat Loss is an awesome program, and I would highly recommend it, but if I were to continuously try and fix the meals they present each day I would be back eating peanut butter-filled pretzels and Digiorno’s Pizzas by now. Dana and I found foods that worked for us so we are able to attain our numbers, were simple, and things we liked. 

If you aren’t a gourmet chef, don’t try to be one.

I eat a lot of salmon on the grill, lean ground turkey with some taco seasoning, grilled chicken, and grilled shrimp. We get carbs from sweet potatoes, jasmine and brown rice, and fruits (mainly bananas, blueberries, apples, and oranges). Do we eat other things? Heck yes! I just wanted to give you our foundation especially what we leaned on in the early going. As I mentioned earlier, it’s about learning “how to” eat and what works for you. As time progresses, you will find out when you can mix in that pizza, burger, or ice cream because once you know how to eat you won't easily fall off that proverbial cliff. Knowledge truly is power! 

Another important thing I learned was and that was I’m not sure there was ever a point in my life when I was eating enough of the right stuff. There were days when I consumed a lot of food or calories, but never the right food. However, I think back, I would be willingly to bet almost every day of my old way of eating I came up short in the area of protein (likely way short). As I’ve stated countless times, when I’m able to get my mind made up, I can lose 30 pounds in a couple months. Though, it’s never lasting. Now, compare that to this time around. I’ve went from 206 pounds to 174.4 pounds in 7 months. As a math teacher, that is 32 pounds in 210 days.

(August 2020, around 175 pounds)

I wanted to trust what I thought what right, but I began trusting my macros. When I started the process, I put in as my goal to lose one pound per week. Well, 32 pounds in 210 days is nearly one pound per week. Again, trust the process!

Trust the Process

In our society, we have been wired and programmed to want things quick, fast, and easy. You know that microwave society. There is nothing worth having that is quick, fast, and easy. My earthly Father has modeled discipline, consistency, and simplicity for me throughout my entire life. What a blessing! By the grace of God, I’ve been able to remain disciplined, stick to the plan, and even when there were weeks that it didn’t appear I was making progress Dana encouraged me to keep pressing forward. Hopefully, I’ve done the same for her. 

“For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” -Hebrews 12:11

“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.” -Proverbs 12:1

This was the very first time that I used the slow cook method to losing fat, and this time, I was eating more of the right stuff and I didn’t lose muscle composition. Imagine that, when you read, research, listen to experts, and put the plan into action, you get the results you wanted thinking you knew best.

Don’t be Fooled

I know how easy this can be, so I wanted to mention it. We are all constantly being marketed to like never before in the history of mankind. It’s a 24/7, in-your-face business. Look, I’ve used supplements (still do but I’m very selective) and I’ve tried many different programs, but very rarely (almost never) do they cash the checks that they are writing. It has nothing to do with the supplements or the programs, because they will work, if you have the right mind set and knowledge heading into them. Unfortunately, most feast off people that have no plan to follow through. In the moment, they are inspired by something but inspiration quickly fades away and you are left picking up the pieces to money wasted. 

Retired Navy Seal David Goggins says “inspiration means nothing to him, but it’s the driven who will succeed.”

You can attempt every latest and great diet, try all the newest supplements, and buy as many workout programs as you want. Trust me either I’ve tried them or know someone who has. All of it is crap unless you plan on putting in the work. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon. The journey can be messy at times, but beautiful all in the same. 

There is absolutely 100 percent, without a shadow of a doubt, no substitute for putting in the work.

Faster Way was the jump started I needed, and it gave me the tools to learn how to eat right. Though, it’s like going out and buying a pair of running shoes and never running if I don’t move forward with the tools I’ve been given.

Dana and I have taken those tools, and we’ve learned how, what, and when to eat. Is it easy to count macros every single day, take a food scale with you wherever you go, or not eat enticing junk food when every one else is indulging? To be honest, at times it’s not easy, but at other times it is. I’m motivated by every time I pass up that momentary craving. I count it as a win. If I have 5 wins in a day and 1 loss that is around 150 wins per month to just 30 L’s.

Curve in the Road

We were rolling along quite nicely and found a rhythm. I was getting up around 4 am going to the gym, so I could come home and get ready to be at work by 6:30 am. It wasn’t always easy, but I didn’t want that precious time with Hudson interrupted after school (I teach school in case you didn’t know). I’m not exactly sure, but I was about 6 weeks into doing the 4:30 am workouts when suddenly plans changed. I’m reminded of this scripture...

Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. -Proverbs 19:21

A global pandemic had swept through the United States like a tidal wave shutting down everything in its way. By the way, unless you have been on a boat for a month or two, it’s still going on.

This was a brutal blow to someone who is a creature of habit and likes control of their plans and agenda. I was reminded just how quickly it can all be taken away. I’m not entitled to be able to work out or have this nice routine every day, God allows us those blessings. I’m often reminded on days when I don’t feel like working out that I get to work out. I just change a couple words and it completely reshapes my mindset.

Our last day in the classroom was March 13, 2020. In the following days, there was a lot of questions, uncertainty, fear, and doubt running through my mind. It was almost like this sense of doom. I knew very little about this virus, and began trusting in myself and fearing for my wife, my son, my parents, and my family.  It’s so easy to be swept away by fear and doubt. If you felt that or are feeling that right now, you aren’t alone.

Despite, my weaknesses, God continued and continues to show faithful. He reminds me that...

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. -2 Timothy 1:7 <-- This is my life verse

He also made sure I didn’t forget...

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. -Isaiah 41:10

Please, listen to me here, even in our moments of weakness we can rejoice. Brother Paul said this in his letter to the Corinthians...

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. -2 Corinthians 12:9

What??? We can boast in our weaknesses? Yes, that is when God’s power shines brightest.

Moving Forward

We were now into this time of uncertainty. Dana and I were both teaching online from home and Hudson (not even a year old at the time) was running around like a wild man. Busy and active! This was challenging to say the least especially for Dana as her job (3rd Grade Intervention Specialist) requires a lot more face-to-face (Google Meets) interaction than my 7th grade math students. By the way, she was a rockstar throughout the entire transition.  

I was scrolling through social media and people were talking about their quarantine bodies and all the usual nonsense, and I just remember thinking not on my watch. God had allowed me to come too far to let a lockdown derail me.

I made a decision that I was going to use this time and figure out a way to come out of this even better.

I’ve worked out in my living room, in the bed room (save the jokes), in the garage (my main spot), and at a buddy’s house. I’ve walked, I’ve ran, I’ve ran hills, carried wreck bags, and everything in between. In the month of April, we did a burpee challenge (100 burpees per day). Fortunately, I was able to accumulate 3,000 by the end of the month thanks in large part to Jordan Barbina who pushed me to be my best. 

I’ve been able to stay locked into my macros despite a 5-day trip to Nashville, a four-day trip to St. Clairsville, a 5-day trip to Aurora, and a 5-day trip to Lake Cumberland. When you have a plan in place and you stay consistent, you are less likely to slip. I knew there would be a couple bad meals involved in those trips, so I planned for that and accounted for it, and I also made sure I took my food scale and stayed consistent. Simple and consistent always wins out in the end!

This whole thing reminds me of E + R = O. None of us were able to control the event (E) that occurred, but we all had/have the opportunity to respond (R) in a way that will allow us a chance to earn a more desired outcome. Being locked in a house for nearly 3 months is a great excuse to unravel.

The good news is we don’t have to. There is always a way. It may not be the same way that we are used to, but remember we control our response. I can’t go to the gym, but you know what, I can get my butt up off the couch or out of the chair and do 10 burpees. I may not be able to attend Grace Fellowship and worship with other believers in person, but I can make sure I hit that play button online every Sunday morning at 8 am. I may not be able to shake any hands, say hello, or provide a smiling face for the people walking into the church (I’m a greeter), but I can watch the joy in my Wife’s heart as our 16-month-old gets excited to see Pastor Keith on the television screen.

My Heart

My prayer at the beginning of this pandemic was that more people would come to know Jesus Christ and call on His beautiful name for salvation. That people would see there is hope where is looks like there is none. I wanted to pray that people would see all the light despite so much darkness.

If I’m honest, as much as I’ve put into my eating and working out, I haven’t been nearly as diligent when it comes to making sure this was my prayer each and every day. It makes me sad in many ways. I’m a Christian, and ultimately my purpose is to know God and make God known. I want everyone to know the same lifesaving power of Jesus Christ that I’ve experienced in my life, which was all by the grace and mercy of God. I want people to know that no matter how badly they’ve screwed up that hope and forgiveness is freely there for them. It’s free because Christ paid the ultimate price so salvation could be a free gift offered to us. I want people to know that and I want people to experience it and as I noted earlier I’ve done a pretty poor job of lifting these sentiments up in prayer.

I want to apologize and I want you to know that I’m deeply sorry that I haven’t been fulfilling something that is so lasting and something that is so significantly important when it comes to eternity. I’m reminded of this...

For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come. -1 Timothy 4:8

This is not say that I’m going to stop training and stop eating right right, because for me, that sets the tone for me mentally, physically, and spiritually. I say this to be transparent, and let you know that I need to a better job of fulfilling what the Lord has laid on my heart.

When I start my day with a devotion and scripture along with physical training, I feel like I can charge a large army with a nerf gun.

Let’s Keep Fighting

We don’t know where this country is headed in the next days, months, or even years, but lets control what we can control and know God is sovereign. There isn’t one single thing that Has surprised Him yet. Remember, the battle has already been won. Spoiler alert: Christ wins!

He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken. -Isaiah 25:8

We may be facing troubles now, but...

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” James 1:2-4

Your Heavenly Father has spoken...

“So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

I love each and every one of you, but even more, God loves you in a way I can’t even fathom! Please, please never forget that! You are LOVED!

[ohioguru03]

Let’s Turn Back

The year 2020 has been something...something indeed! 

As a Christian man, I’m trying to use wisdom, knowledge, understanding, and discernment, while listening and doing my best to be empathetic. With the availability of a smartphone and social media, we have to be very careful to make sure our words and message line up with God’s written word. 

I can’t say I’m completely shocked, but it’s disheartening to watch Christians move further and further from the truth and continue to spill out word-after-word. Love, mercy, grace, forgiveness, kindness, justice, righteousness, and self-control don’t appear to be what we are striving for. 

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. -Galatians 5:22-23

We, as a country, are in an absolute state of confusion. Who do we believe? What do we believe? Who is for us? Who is against us? I have been in deep thought over the past two weeks and ran through a tidal wave of emotions. To be honest, the majority of the time I didn’t know what to think or how to feel. Who or what am I mad at or about? The Lord has really been working on me in the areas of patience, empathy, pride, and listening, while not responding instantly or with emotion when it comes to issues that require wisdom.  Then, it hit me, no matter what Kurt feels or believes it doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Feelings and emotions are fickle and change with the way the wind blows. God is a God of peace and not a God of confusion, so you know without a shadow of a doubt that Satan has his evil hands in all of this. It hit me that we as a country don’t need any help bringing ourselves down. We are rotting from within. The powers that be want us to continue to divide as people instead of unite. If we all take a step back from our strong and powerful emotions, which is easier said than done, we will be able to more clearly see that we are treating each other in a way that in no way, shape, or form honors God. 

As brother Paul tells us in the Book of Ephesians, we aren’t in a battle with our brothers and sisters, but against SIN.  For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. -Ephesians 6:12 As a Christian man, let me be blunt, there is a real enemy that comes, has come, and will continue to come to lie, steal, and destroy. I’m not talking about earthly things, I’m talking about our eternal souls. Believers...the opponent isn’t physical but spiritual.  The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I (Jesus) have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. -John 10:10 As Christians, if we don’t acknowledge there is a real enemy that is doing everything he can to separate us from Our Heavenly Father or distracting us from being obedient, we are absolutely standing on a false gospel. We have an enemy that is destroying us and we are letting it happen, while not turning to the only ONE who can save us. We need to stop reading social media and pick up the Sword of the Spirit which is God’s written word. Let’s stop scrolling and go be the change we want to see.  10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. -Ephesians 6:12-18 Christians in America it’s time to rise up and stop playing Church. I’m so tired of hearing about right, left, Democrat, Republican, White, Black, Blue, Red, liberal, conservative, Trump, Biden, Fox News, CNN, Fake News etc...etc...there is NOT One of those things with the power to save. We are all mere mortals, who one day will be laying in the dirt with worms. We are ALL sinners in need of a sinless Savior (Jesus). Only what we do in the name of Jesus will remain. 10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad. -2 Corinthians 5:10 If we are turning to anyone other than Jesus as our lifeline, we looking in the wrong place. We can’t claim to be Christians yet completely ignore God and His word when tough times come. Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram have zero saving power nor do the people (including myself) that make up these social media platforms.  12 Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name (Jesus) under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved." -Acts 4:12 In John 14, Jesus said to His disciples, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.” -John 14:6 Please, be honest with me, does this sound familiar? 1 But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people. -2 Timothy 3:1-5 Believers...put your trust in the Creator rather than the creation.

12 In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, 13 while evildoers and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived. 14 But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, 15 and how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. 16 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17 so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. -2 Timothy 3:12-17

Love your neighbor as yourself!  13 You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. 14 For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 15 If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. 16 So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. -Galatians 5:13-26

No matter what is happening around us, let us continuing doing good.  7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8 Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. -Galatians 6:7-10 Christians, and let me perfectly clear, I’m directing this at myself first and foremost, it’s time to stand up and stand on God’s word. However, we must read and know God’s word before we can stand on it. Stop... just stop getting your truth and opinions from social media, media, politicians, athletes, celebrities, and Hollywood unless what they are professing is the absolute truth and that’s The Word of God. But...how do you know if it’s God’s word? You have to study it, memorize it, know it, and bind it around your heart.

 If you want to argue there aren’t any absolute truths then you are absolute that there aren’t any absolute truths so I guess that’s absolutely true. Don’t take my word for it or any professing Christians for that matter, rather I urge you to pick up The Bible and read it for yourself. Let God speak to you and ask him to open your spiritual eyes. Don’t reject the Jesus of the Bible because of sinful men like myself. I Promise you this, if you only get your view of Jesus from me or other Christians, you will be highly disappointed and likely to run the other way. We will fail you...He won’t! There are no word that I can ever say or write that will top the word of The Lord. Let’s stop playing American Christianity on Facebook, Twitter, and our bios.

25 But the word of the Lord remains forever.” And that word is the Good News that was preached to you. -1 Peter 1:25

Think about this...how many times have your emotions, attitude, feelings, thoughts, and opinions in regards to different topics changed just this week? Do you really want to put your trust in that when you can have this...

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. -Hebrews 13:8 

No matter what the world throws at us, let us bring God glory through our actions and words.  11 They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb (Jesus) and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. -Revelation 12:11.

[ohioguru03]

Simple and Consistent

How is everyone doing out there? Really, how is everyone doing? 

I last put together an article in late March, which we were in the early going of our new normal. At that time, I was experiencing a lot of different emotions from anger, to anxiety, to worry, to fear, to sadness, and back to peace and joy. 

For the most part, we have been living our new normal since leaving school on March 13th, which was 51 days ago. Full disclosure, we’ve sat in the driveway with my parents, sister, and brother-n-law the last two beautiful Saturday’s. We did our best to keep our social distance, but it was just really nice to be around loved ones again without the shield of a computer or phone screen. 

One thing is clear, and we certainly shouldn’t be surprised, human beings were meant to interact with other humans. 

Dana and I have continued our online/remote learning journey as educators. She has an extremely difficult task of meeting the needs of her IEP students, which she is doing a fantastic job at on a daily basis. Two or three times per day she is working one-on-one or small group over Google Meet. Special education teachers are special people!  I couldn’t be more proud of her dedication to make sure her kids get the best education possible with the hand we’ve been dealt. I’ve seen her emotions run the gamut. She wasn’t right for two days after finding out face-to-face learning was over for the year. She weeped after seeing her kids at the home parade they did. She wears her love and passion for her students, more specifically the underdogs, on her sleeve. Those of you know that her, know that’s one of the reasons we love her! 

I haven’t even got to the fun part of educating from home. There is this adorable 1-year-old running around like a wild man and wanting to be a part of all video calls. Hudson, as lovable as he is, gives you that road game feel when you are trying to shoot free-throws and the opposing student section is going nuts. 

What have I learned?

Throughout this journey, I’ve tried to focus on understanding my strengths and weaknesses more. I want to use this time wisely to be a better version of myself when we come out of this. 

It was evident from the start that I love routine and control. Of course, my daily (Monday through Friday) was thrown off and I had to adjust to a new normal. Did I mention I like my routines? I’m sure that’s a not shocker to those of you who know me. 

After I got over that, I decided I need to make new routines within the parameters of our quarantine. There was a point, and I can’t recall exactly when it was, that I was okay with not having control over this situation. I know I have very little control anyway, but when we have a daily order we feel as if we have some control. I may be mistaken, but I think it started with a simple set of 5 burpees between grading some formative assessments. I thought, hey, why don’t I just set a timer and do 5 burpees every 15 minutes while I’m working. (Side Note) That’s where the April Burpee Challenge started. 

Most importantly, I’ve learned that God has allowed Dana and I invaluable time to spend with Hudson in a time where he is doing new stuff all the time. I have no idea if we will ever go through another time like this in our lifetime, which history says it’s unlikely, so I’m trying to do my best to savor this special time with my wife and son. As I mentioned, we may never get another time in our lifetime where things are this still and quiet where we have time to just be together because our schedules aren’t distracting us. I’m really, really trying to savor every moment of this! 

I know we are blessed and fortunate to both still have jobs and we continue to receive a paycheck, which isn’t the case for everyone so I know many people aren’t in the same mindset. Many people are facing challenges that are unimaginable so I don’t want anyone to think that I’m making light of that with the mindset I have with our situation. 

Simple and Consistent

One of the things that continues to gain steam with me is to keep things simple and consistent. It’s so easy to get caught up in the latest and greatest trends, cognitive overload due to constant information, and just trying to keep your head above water. We often make things entirely too complex, which leads to quitting things we start or never even starting because we are too overwhelmed. 

Simple Wins! Consistent Wins! If you look at people we would consider the greats of their profession, they most likely have one thing in common. I would bet a large sum (if I had it) they are great in the fundamentals of their craft. You know the things we look at as simple and foundational, but most never master. The greats are great in the day-to-day and the mundane. 

My Father is a great example of this. The man can accomplish more in a day than 10 human beings half his age and still have time to be there for those in need. To be honest, a lot of his time (along with my wonderful Mother), is spent caring for and putting the needs of others as a top priority. Selfless, generous, giving, and honorable. 

I’m a deep thinker and sometimes get caught up in the thinking and miss out on the doing (action). My Mother and Father keep it simple and consistent. They Love God and Love People! Jesus puts it this way when asked in Matthew 22:36-40: 

“Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

I’m not saying studying God’s word is overrated, so please don’t hear that, because I believe it’s absolutely essential to the Christian life. However, many times as we progress in our Christian walk, we can become information consumers and forget about the obedience part. I’ve heard it said that we don't have a knowledge problem, but rather an obedience problem. We live in an age where there is entirely too much information and through the complexity of it all we forget how simple it can be (Love God and Love People). My parents do this consistently and make it simple...see a need and fill out! You may have heard me say this before, but my Dad used to tell me...

“while you are thinking about cutting the grass, I’ve already got it cut.” 

I know for me personally this can be a struggle as I often overthink things, and end up doing nothing. At times, I can get so deep in thought that the people around may think I’m a million miles away. It’s really hard to describe to others, but I analyze and analyze and analyze to almost an obsession. There are aspects of life that I’m able to thrive because of this trait, but it can be a serious hindrance as well. It’s good thing I’m still a work in progress! 

An imperfect person trying to follow a perfect God! 

[ohioguru03]

Times of Trial

I’ve been trying to piece together my thoughts and emotions over the last week, and I’m finally starting to get some clarity. Perhaps, like some of you, I didn’t pay much mind to the Corona Virus (Covid-19) when it was on foreign soil. Heck, when it first arrived in America my level of concern wasn’t real high. In my mind, I was telling myself this is another H1N1, SARS, Bird Flu, etc...and we will continue business as usual as the media tries its best to place fear in everyone.

It hit me today that my last statement is actually part of the problem. It’s like the little boy who cries wolf. The American people have been pawns in a game being played by political parties and the national media for so long it’s not crazy to think they wouldn’t believe this, downplay it, or not take it seriously. We finally have a real pandemic, a real threat to people in this country, and people are just now slowly coming to grips with this reality. Even now, there are naysayers despite both political sides telling you the same thing, highly intelligent doctors and scientists pleading with the people that this is the “real deal.” Again, I believe it can be traced back to American people not knowing what to believe or how much to believe. 

My Story

Let me start with the selfish portion. On Tuesday, I found out the Ohio High School Athletic Association was going to limit spectators to the remainder of its events to just four tickets per player. However, the media would still be included. If you are unaware or don’t really care, the tournament was currently in Regional Play on the boy’s side and getting ready to start the State Tournament at St. John Arena on the girl’s portion. Tuesday’s Regional boys games were played in front of its normal crowds, while Wednesday it was just a few onlookers. However, by Thursday afternoon the tournament was postponed until further notice. I would be absolutely shocked if this ever resumes. 

My Father and I have been attending the Boy’s State Tournament together since 1999 and I first went in 1997 with his first taking place in 1966. Selfishly, I was disappointed that this was not going to happen in 2020. 

Then, the NCAA conference tournaments and NCAA Tournament were cancelled and it was bye-bye March Madness. I figured if I was going to be home at least I could watch college basketball. Still, at this point, not recognizing or realizing what was happening. 

In the following days, schools were closed, church services were cancelled, restaurants and bars closed, and well basically anything where gatherings could take place. It went from 100 to 50 to 10. Now, it’s recommended to be isolated with only immediate family and to go out only when it’s a necessity. 

My Emotions

I’ve run the gamut of emotions over the last week. I’m experiencing bouts of anger, depression, anxiousness, worry, fear, hope, and joy. 

It started with fearing what might happen if I were come down with this then it went to what about my family (Dana and Hudson) and finally to My Parents and the elderly who they keep telling us are at the highest risk. I’ve found myself caught between the feelings of losing my usual busyness and soaking in every movement of my Wife and Son. 

People are losing their jobs, income, and stability. Kids, without school, are having to watch their younger siblings and getting two quality meals have become much more difficult all while trying to course work. 

This is the ultimate wakeup call that the control we believe we have is really an illusion. In reality, we have very little control. 

My Response and My Hope

One thing that is ever apparent is just how much we take our freedoms for granted. I’m writing of the simplest things like being able to go out to the grocery store or having a conversation with someone at the bank, which we do daily without worry. 

In addition, it’s even more evident that a lot of things we deem as important or prioritize on a daily basis don’t really amount to much. In a time, where the United State has basically come to a halt, we are reminded that the most important thing in this life are people and loving people. 

My two favorite hobbies are sports and working out, and it was like God informing me that He “allows” me to do those things, and I can shut those down whenever I see fit, which leads me to my next thought. 

I was talking to a buddy and he confirmed what I feel like God has been trying to tell me all week. Three people have confirmed this for me in a matter of 24 hours and they had no idea how or what God was speaking to me about this week. This is what has been confirmed multiple times. “Maybe this is God’s way of slowing us down and getting us to focus on what matters most.” Just another example of God taking something meant for harm and using it for good. Many times in the Bible, God had to go to extremes to get His people’s attention. Perhaps, this is one of those times. I certainly don’t have all the answers, but maybe this is something to seriously consider in this time of uncertainty. I believe God is ready and willing to speak to all of us in mighty ways over this time of shutdown. Let’s be available!

I’ve mentioned this before, and I think it’s worth saying again, which is our God is not asleep at the wheel. He is still on the throne and He is still in control, and nothing under the sun is happening that He wasn’t aware of. It’s okay to be fearful and scared, but turn it over to The Lord, and let Him give you His peace that surpasses all understanding. If you are struggling with fear, worry, or anxiety through this time of uncertainty, I encourage you to read these scriptures over-and-over again. Instead of continuing to scroll through social media, dive into God’s word and let it soak through you. 

My Prayer:

Through all of this, I pray that this isn’t a meaningless trial. We, as a people, need to lean into what God is speaking to us as most of the constant noise and busyness has disappeared. There is a great time to just be alone with God and seek His face. Trials and tribulations mean very little if we aren’t growing and learning through them. So, let’s not miss it!

My ultimate prayer is that through all of this that more people will come know to know Jesus Christ, who is The Way, The Truth, and The Life, and NO ONE comes to The Father except through Him. I pray that thousands if not millions will surrender their lives over to Christ and find their hope in Jesus. 

I’ve been without hope in my life, and I’m far from perfect now, but Jesus Christ saved a sinful man like me and He died for you as well. I’ve screwed up, messed up, and everything in between even since giving my life to The Lord, but the only difference is now I have hope in eternity with My Heavenly Father. 

As Christians, may our light shine in this time of uncertainty and turmoil. In trials, may we respond in a way that shows we serve The King of Kings and our hope is not found on this Earth or anything it has to offer, but rather our Hope is in Jesus Christ. 

[ohioguru03]

The Gold Standard

As I walked through the greeting line,Thursday night, at my Uncle Jim’s showing, I came upon perhaps the strongest woman I’ve ever known. Let me preface, I don’t mean the loud, opinionated, and bold fixture that society tells women they now have to be. I’m speaking of a woman of incredible faith and simply the gold standard when it comes to honor, integrity, kindness, compassion, and being beautiful inside and out albeit standing around 4-foot-10. She has true inner strength that comes solely from her Lord Jesus Christ (See Proverbs 31).

I came upon a woman, who just two days ago, had to receive 2 liters of blood just to secure the energy to make it to her chair that she was seated in. Not only was Uncle Jim battling serious health issues, but this incredible woman is as well. Though, she would never tell you, because for her, it’s never about her, a picture of selflessness. The type of illness that would melt most of us, but there she was sitting in a chair to honor her beloved husband of six-plus decades.  

Seated in her chair, with a brace around her upper body, was my wonderful Aunt Maci. When my Granda Brown passed, Maci (my Mother’s oldest sister) assumed the role of the leader of this large, large family. As I mentioned, she is and always will be the glue that holds it all together. The straw that stirs the drink if you will.

I looked down to give her a hug, and I gazed upon a woman that continues to fight the good fight. Uncle Jim and Aunt Maci spent 66 years together, which is something most of us will never know, understand or truly comprehend. You could see the painful hurt and loss in her eyes, while fighting her own struggle inside.

I was driving into work on Friday, and began being overcome with tears, which is not common for me. I began thinking about some of the dark days for me filled with worry, anxiety and fear in my early 20s while at Ohio University. Aunt Maci, who never forgets any of her loved ones and trust me there are many, would send me hand-written notes (still does) and scriptures while I was in Athens when I needed them most. I don’t believe in irony or coincidence, especially when it comes to a woman that’s walked so closely with The Lord. I’m positive she was doing this very thing for countless others.

I say this frequently, but they just don’t make humans like this anymore! My sister (Lisa Shrieve) spent many summer days with Uncle Jim and Aunt Maci during her childhood, and I know she loved every second of it and always looked forward to spending time with two amazing people. Uncle Jim always teased Lisa, which she loved.

I left in amazement, thinking about 66 years spent together, and what a testament that is to love, sacrifice, mercy, grace, patience, and understanding. It’s not easy, but like all the great ones do, they made it look that way.

You see the fruits of their labor everywhere, but you don’t have to look any further than their sons (Chuck and Greg), daughter-n-law Connie (one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met), and Zack Kendall, who I always thought could pass for their third son. There is a common theme among all four…and it’s “selfless.” The type of people that are always there, no matter what the need! Selflessness is not our default as humans, so this was learned through an example set and it’s no secret where they witnessed it modeled.

Thank you Aunt Maci and Uncle Jim for setting such high standards for all of us! There is enough average in this world, but you both are/were anything but average. Uncle Jim has now passed from this life, but is now in Glory, and Aunt Maci your job here isn’t finished yet. You are still inspiring us, loving us, and showing us what it truly means to live as Christ here on Earth. I think I can speak for everyone in this extremely large family…we love you beyond measure and we admire you more than you will ever know!

[ohioguru03]

Where Else Shall I Go?

m                                            My Testimony

Last night, I had an odd but factual dream. People I know, yet a bit random, were asking me why I love God/Jesus so much? To be honest, I found it a bit strange coming from these particular people, but I answered them the only way I knew how. 

I jumped at the chance to tell them why I love Jesus so much and why He is my only hope for salvation. It made me think back to a verse we were recently studying at church. In response to Jesus asking if His disciples were going to turn away as well.. Peter answered Jesus,  “Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words that give eternal life.” (John 6:68). This is exactly how I feel! Even when I have serious doubts, they are quickly erased by my remembrance of God’s mercy and grace He has shown me time-after-time. I look back on things that happened (I could tell you in more detail at some point if you would like), and only a fool would view these things as just coincidence. 

Whether you believe in Christianity or not, that is between you and God, but I wanted to share a short version of my testimony of how Jesus spared my life for eternity. I can’t say for sure, because we all know how foggy dreams can be, but I’m pretty sure I shared this with the people who asked the question. 

See, I grew up in church (United Methodist Church), and loved going as a young kid but I’m not sure I quite had a relationship with Jesus but more of a region of do’s and do not’s. Though, the seeds were planted thanks to my Parents. As the years passed, I continued to attend church but it was more out of guilt and obligation (in other words to check it off the list). As high school began, I drifted even further from my foundation which continued into my mid-to-late 20s. It was a slow fade and I was blinded by the fact that it was even happening. Before I knew it, my religion was only something I would fill out on a survey (you know click the box if you are Christian and check it on Facebook). 

Throughout this time, I know there were people praying for me that I would see the light. Furthermore, God continually placed people in my life to speak life and truth into me. The thing is...I wasn’t ready to hear it or allow Christ to change my heart. I knew I would have to change the way I was living, and the selfishness inside of me just wouldn’t let that happen.  I can reflect back on the countless times people would share truth with me or ask me to attend this or that, and I would politely find an excuse to not go. I can also look back and truthfully say these people were so patient and loving with me despite my ignorance. 

As I began to fade, my life began to be filled with anxiety, worry, panic, fear, obsessions, and control (or lack of). This was a regular occurrence from about age 20-to-28. It began to become normal despite how awful these feelings were. See, I was still able to fully function and hide it from most people other than the few trusted people I would overwhelm with questions and irrational fears/worries. I would turn to many different idols to distract me from my troubles. As we all know, this always leads to a dead end. I can’t count how many times, looking back, God intervened and spared me from even more trouble.

In 2008, it all boiled over. I began to have this overwhelming sense of needing to fill a whole in my soul. I can’t quite describe it, but I knew there was something more than the life I was living.

                                 A Snow-Covered Gravel Road

One day, I was sitting at work, and the panic reached an all-time high. I quickly scurried out the back door and began walking with no goal in my mind. That’s what people with panic do, they escape the current setting they are in (I never quite figured that one out). There was about 5 or 6 inches of snow on the ground and I walked outside with a t-shirt on. It never dawned on me until I got back. As I made my way to the road, I just began shouting and yelling out to God. It was like an out-of-body experience. I was pleading with God to take this pain from me. I can’t recall exactly what I said, but I know there was a lot of yelling and pleading. I gave my life over to Christ that day, and He has delivered in ways I could never imagine. I don’t mean financially (which He has always shown up in that area as well), but rather the rich blessings and joy of getting to know Him more and the people He has placed in my life. 

I would love to say that very instance He completely took all of the worry, anxiety, fear, and panic from me, but He didn’t. God was waiting for me to take a step towards Him (faith) and to see if I was for real. I did and I can’t tell you specifically when it happened but the panic disappeared in only a way God can show up. My eyes were open to new things, and I could see just how spiritually blind I really was. I would have considered myself a good person (manmade definition), but really my life was hopeless without Christ. I was rags and living with no purpose! 

As I invited Christ in my life, it didn’t all of the sudden become rainbows and unicorns, rather it often becomes more difficult. This shouldn’t be surprising to the Christian as Jesus notes in John 16:33... “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Since accepting Jesus into my heart, I’ve experienced the highs and the ultimate lows, but the one thing I can hold tight to is I now have eternal hope. The lows are never easy, but when we have hope of God’s everlasting love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness we can endure the tough times knowing this isn’t our permanent home. I got baptized when I was 13, but I’m not sure I truly knew the significance, so I did so again in my 30s wanting to show an outward sign of an inward change. 

As a Christian man, I strive to look more like Jesus each day, but being transparent, I often fail miserably. As Paul says in Romans 7:15...”I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” I feel like Paul quite often. I’m just thankful that Jesus loved me enough to die for a sinner like me knowing I may never love Him back. That is TRUE LOVE! 

I’m just a sinner like the rest of you. I’m screwed up, messed up, and full of baggage. I’m often selfish and still get in my own way at times.  I’m an imperfect person striving to be more like a perfect God. So, please, don’t judge Christianity or Jesus off a sinner like me. We will fail you every time! 

I used to have a church story, but now I have Jesus story! I will never tell anyone what to believe, but I can tell you that Jesus Christ absolutely 100% changed my life. This is a real, factual testimony of how Christ changed a wretched man like me! 

The Untold Story...Shame and Redemption 

There is a part of this story that I have never told you, but it’s time. I have tried to hide this part of my story for a long time out of guilt and shame. Somewhere, in my human mind, I didn’t believe God could use this part of my story. Somehow, I didn’t believe God could use this “failure” to connect and relate to others. Ultimately, I think it boiled down to myself not wanting others to think I wasn’t actually a Christian. Notice, all of my worries revolved around “Kurt” being the main character instead of God. If I truly believe all scripture is “God-breathed” then Jesus died for this as well and He will use this for HIs Glory if I will open up and share this part of my story. 

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, -2 Timothy 3:16

So, without further introduction, here is the part I intentionally left out for years...

For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open. -Luke 8:17

In July of 2009, I got married...for the first time. To be honest, I had no idea what I was doing or getting into. I had met a young lady, while I was volunteering at youth group. As some of you may know, I grew up in the Methodist Church, but a guy I knew (the youth pastor) had kept inviting me to different opportunities. Finally, i said yes, and began volunteering at youth group. In just a few months, I was completely immersed in this church and was spiritually growing in leaps-and-bounds. I was so caught up in this life-change that at some point I felt like getting married was the next step along the way. 

I met several young ladies at this church, but the youth pastor’s cousin was the one that continued to pursue me. Long story short, and a very (very) short time, we were engaged and slated to get married in Oregon in July of 2009. 

I can and will admit this...I knew this was not right for me from the beginning, but for some reason, I thought God had ordained this whole thing. I was definitely caught up in the “new believer” high. Ultimately, looking back I believe the Holy Spirit was doing everything He could to get my attention to let me know this ISN’T what God had for me. However, I continued to ignore, and carried on playing out what I thought a Christian man was supposed to do. I acted out this entire story. Even up to the day of the wedding, everything within me was telling me NOOOOOO, but I didn’t have the courage to call it off so I just continued playing out this story. 

To no one’s surprise...things were rocky from the start. I want to preface, that in a marriage it takes 100% from both parties which means we both had 100% blame in the marriage falling apart. To me, as a man of God, I would never turn this into a “He said...She said” or blame this person or that person. We both had an equal hand in the demise of the marriage. The only thing I can say is...it the marriage) never should have happened in the first place. This marriage should have never taken place, but it did, because I decided to ignore the Holy Spirit’s prompting. I will say it again, I knew in my bones this wasn’t right for me, but I was too much of a coward to end things in the dating stage. To be 100% honest, some of the closest people to me that I love and cherish their opinion dearly, knew it from the start but I knew best. I don’t know if in some strange way I was taking it as a challenge to prove them wrong instead of just listening to people that love me and could see the writing on the wall. 

I hurt a lot of people close to me with this decision, and still to this day, I haven’t been able to recapture some of those cherished relationships. That’s on me!

I won’t go into all the details of the 6-year marriage, but it officially came to an end in August of 2015. I want to reiterate a marriage is about two people with 100% ownership. I have no idea what story my ex-wife tells, but I can tell you from my lens both parties were to blame. I can say I hope she has found her true purpose in this earthly life and has discovered joy. 

This story isn’t about my ex-wife, but it’s more about me and my disobedience from the jump. There are consequences to our actions and there are parts of me still reeling from those 6 to 7 years. I made those decisions...I did that...no one else. I knew I was entering into a marriage I was never supposed to be in, but went ahead any way. I take full ownership for that and the eventual failure of the marriage. 

After the divorce, my mind was so skewed. I thought I had committed the unforgivable sin and that God would never honor or bless any of my relationships moving forward especially if I chose to get remarried. I was believing lies from our enemy. I didn’t think God ever wanted me to be happy again. Still, to this day, I don’t know if I have fully forgiven “myself.” 

I was ashamed to tell anyone, so for the most part, I’ve tried to hide that I was ever married before. I’ve tried to completely erase any part of those 6 years from my hard drive. I know people know, but I have spent the last 9 years pretending as if they don’t. I didn’t want them to think I was a “fake” Christian and look at this guy who says he is a Christian but then goes and gets a divorce. I never wanted to face that persecution. 

Though, finally, I’m slowly beginning to forgive myself and know that I’m only going to answer to ONE in the end. I don’t know what God is going to say about my first marriage, but I do know that Jesus Christ died for sinners just like me (even a failed marriage). The only thing I want to hear is “well done good and faithful servant!”

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. -Hebrews 4:16

I feel a weight lifted from me and I hope that someone can in some way connect to my story. I apologize for hiding this part of my Testimony for so long. I truly do! Remember, Jesus Christ died for all sin and if He didn’t none of this really matters any way. 

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” -John 3:16-17

It’s 2024, and I’ve been married to my wife Dana for 6-plus years and we have two incredible blessings from God in our son Hudson and daughter Quinn. God is and will always be in the REDEMPTION business. I’m proof over-and-over again! 

But now, this is what the LORD says— he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. -Isaiah 43:1

If my story resonates with you or you just want to reach out and share your story, I would love to hear from you. I truly mean that. You can email me at [email protected]. 

[ohioguru03]

It may not be easy, but it will be worth it...

I’ve written several times on here about working out, diet, and my own personal struggle with body image, so it won’t be a surprise to the throngs of people who read my C- blog that the topic is resurfacing. This is something I’m passionate about, and I truly believe many people struggle with these same issues, which is why I write so much about it. 

Working out has never really been an issue for me, rather, the diet and body image side of things is another story. Of course, if you read my blog, you already know this. 

A little over a year ago, I penned an article referencing my increase in body weight and vowed that it would be taken care of immediately. I forgot one, small aspect to that, which is cleaning up my eating. I increased my workouts but failed to work on my diet. Guess what? If you do what you’ve always done, you will get what you’ve always gotten. Pretty basic, but how often do we live as if this isn’t true? We somehow believe that we will be the exception to the rule for the first time in human history. I guess that sums up how selfish we can be, but that’s another topic for another day. 

I don’t know if it was the moron side of me or what, but I couldn’t understand why my waistline continued to grow despite working out at what I felt was an intense level. The more I worked out, the more and more I ate...anything and everything. 

The picture shown below on the left is from January 6, 2018 at 208 pounds compared to the one on the right taken on July 25, 2018 at 179.8 pounds. 

After summer ended, and I didn’t have to wear tank tops or swim trunks any longer, I found it cool to become a little thicker like I was some sort of powerhouse or something. However, it wasn’t long before I noticed my skin becoming nasty, my face ballooning, and my belly popping out in my sweaters at school. 

One of our secretaries at school made reference to me being happy after I returned from our Honeymoon. Of course, that was true, but I know she was also noting my plump, jelly-belly. See, I returned from my honeymoon at 208 pounds, which is the most I have ever weighed. Mentally, I was beating myself up day-after-day but just couldn’t seem to get things turned around. It was like a hamster on a wheel. 

The wife and I quickly hopped on the 80-Day Advocare Challenge after we returned from our Honeymoon, but I don’t think either of our mindsets were completely dialed in on the mission. Needless to say, we didn’t last anywhere close to 80 days. Maybe 80 hours? Despite the setback, I still managed to drop a couple lbs. 

Over the next couple of months, I struggled mentally to turn on my discipline. In my mind, I woke up every morning wanting and hoping to make a change in my eating. I was somewhat becoming depressed with it. I just couldn’t seem to get it turned around. 

Meanwhile, from January to the end of April I continued to eat very poorly...all day long! I continued to work out, but my workouts were so sluggish due to the increase in body fat. My sleep was being disrupted by the late night eating and all the crap I was putting into my body. When I say I was eating all day long, well, that is not an exaggeration. Pizza, cookies, donuts, cupcakes, candy bars, crackers, pretzels, chips, french fries, etc...Sweets during the day and pizza and french fries at night. This was all on top of everything else I was eating whether it was good or bad. 

Over the past year, we got married and bought a new house during the school year, so there was some added stress, but no reason to turn to things that promise things they can’t deliver on. You know the momentary comfort (maybe 10 to 15 seconds at best) followed by the hours of guilt and beating yourself up for how you are eating and feeling. In other words, sin (gluttony) over promises and under delivers.

Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. -Philippians 3:19

I even started a weight loss challenge at school to get me kick-started, but even the first three weeks of the challenge weren’t enough to knock down the mental bind that clamped me down and was squeezing the energy out of me. You are likely asking yourself, is there a turn in the story? Thankfully, the answer is yes!

In the latter half of April, my wife’s sister got married in Nashville, and like most weddings and receptions a lot of pictures are taken. It wasn’t until those pictures surfaced a week later that reality hit me with a Mike Tyson haymaker. 

When I saw myself in those pictures, to be quite honest, I was disgusted in every sense of the word. I looked like I had aged quite a bit, my skin was nasty, and it appeared someone pumped me up with an air pump of hot garbage. Harsh enough? This is me on the left. My belt is begging for mercy. The last notch life. 

I know I’m a child of God and made in God’s image, but He never meant for me to indulge in food and gluttony the way I had for nearly two years. Once I recovered from seeing those pictures, I knew there were no more excuses, it was time to get serious. 

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. -1 Corinthians 6:19-20

On April 30th, I began my journey and I love the word journey because anything worth doing is a journey or a marathon if you will. I started the beautiful journey at 202 pounds. 

But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified. -1 Corinthians 9:27

I really didn’t have a plan of what I was going to eat, but more so when I was going to eat. To start, I used my Advocare eating plan to time my meals and know what I needed in each. I used Advocare’s Spark, Meal Replacement, and Muscle Gain to support my change in eating. This wasn’t simply a change in eating, but a complete lifestyle change. 

I kept telling myself, if I can make it through the first day, I can turn the corner and get this done. It started with a pound the first week and then another pound the second week. I refused to get discouraged despite only two pounds being dropped after two weeks. I was laser-focused on staying the course. 

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. -Jeremiah 29:11

Finally, in week three, I dropped a total of three pounds. It’s hard to tell when you see yourself daily because in case you weren’t sure, you are always with yourself, but I’m sure inches were coming off if pounds weren’t. I knew that if I ate that poorly for two years, things weren’t going to change overnight. 

It’s a slow cook that’s food worth eating is what I like to say. No pun intended.

My goal when I started was to get down to 185 pounds, and if I was able to attain that, my ultimate goal was 180. After 90 days, I can humbly say, I’m still eating clean. I have to be honest, I’m proud of myself, but also know it’s God’s strength that allowed me to accomplish something I wasn’t sure was ever going to happen again. Praise Him for the ability to persevere! 

I’m not absurd about my eating, but there are things that I’ve totally steered away from including pizza, chips, pretzels, sweets of any kind, and fried/fast food. Oh, I did have an order of French Fries from Bob Evans after running the Savage Race back in early June, but after that race, I would’ve eaten the southbound end of a northbound skunk. 

My energy levels have increased, I’m sleeping better, my overall performance at the gym and on my runs has increased significantly, my internal confidence has grown in many areas, and my wife tells me how good and young I look daily (that tops all of the other things). I honestly feel like I’m in my mid-20′s again. She has been my biggest supporter and encourager, and for that, I can’t thank her enough for her unwavering love! 

The coolest thing happened, on day 50, I hit the 185-pound mark and finally on day 84 (12 weeks) I went under 180 pounds (179.8) for the first time in over two years. 

My fitness journey is a perfect parallel to our spiritual journey. We go through seasons of peaks and valleys, but despite the valleys, our faith remains steadfast. 

With my eating habits going out of control, it felt like I couldn’t see 5 feet in front of me as my windshield was smeared with heavy mud. However, through it all, God continued to teach me things and work on me even if I couldn’t see. This is precisely how our walk with Jesus can be sometimes. We can’t see the next step, but we know the One that holds it. It takes faith to move forward even if we aren’t sure where we are headed.

And without faith, it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him. -Hebrews 11:6

Whether you are struggling with weight, diet, mental strongholds, relationship issues, trouble with your kids or parents, addictions etc...I encourage you to just keep pressing forward. Your situation may not change today, tomorrow, next month, next year, or the next decade, but if you entrust it to God, I can assure you it’s in much better hands then striving to do it on our own.

Please, please don’t do life alone! We were never created to do life alone. I’m speaking to myself here as well because my default is to retreat and seclude myself especially when I’m going through the trials of this life. See, our enemy wants us to do this very thing because when he can get us alone that is when he will torment our minds and fill us with lies. 

So, again, I encourage you to surround yourself with people that love you, will support you, encourage you, and tell you the Truth in love when needed. 

I hope you find these scriptures helpful and bring peace to your soul no matter what you are going through. 

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. -Romans 12:12

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. -Galatians 6:9

Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him. -James 1:12

[ohioguru03]

Let’s Analyze Our Hearts...

Until we see ourselves as sinners we will never see our need for a Savior. It’s nearly impossible to show mercy, grace, and forgiveness to others unless we can first see who we truly are and despite that our Heavenly Father shows us an endless amount of those very things. We can never truly understand mercy, grace, and forgiveness until we see it from the One that gives it freely. If I really take inventory of what lies in my heart and analyze who I truly am at my core, I know I have no hope of salvation without Jesus. This King of Kings died for us taking the world’s sin upon His mighty shoulders knowing full well that we may never love Him back or even recognize what He did for us. 

To be quite honest, it can painful to truly know what resides deep inside of us which is why many of us spend a great deal of time distracting ourselves with activities that aren’t bad but often times meaningless. We try to stay as busy as possible, so we don’t have to be alone with our thoughts. I’ve got both hands up here. 

“The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is? -Jeremiah 17:9 I encourage all of us to analyze our hearts and truly see what lies within the depths of our souls. Friends, salvation can be yours right now. The assurance of eternal hope after this life and eternity spent with God is one “cry out” away.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. -Proverbs 4:23   Call upon the Lord and ask Him to save your soul for eternity, ask Him to make Himself real to you, ask Him to forgive you and wipe all of your sin away (past, present, and future), ask Him to make you brand new, ask Him to open your spiritual eyes and ears, completely give Him your life from this point forward, and ask Him for wisdom to move forward on your walk with Jesus. This is just between God and you. Tonight, there is someone that needed and wanted to hear this to take that next step. It’s a decision you will never, ever regret. 

With Love, 

Kurt

[ohioguru03]

Life Is...

This summer, our church, Grace Fellowship, is doing a season-long series on what “Love Is.” I can honestly say it’s been the best message series I’ve heard, perhaps, ever. Pastor Keith and his team have done an incredible job communicating this series to us. It has challenged me at my core and hopefully changed me in some aspects. 

At times, I become restless with life and this world, because of the weight of burdens it can bring. It can be tiring and troubling. Let’s not sugar coat it, life and people can suck at times. Yes, I know all the verses about being joyful and loving our neighbor etc. etc..., but at the end of the day we are flawed and sinful humans, and we can’t always live up to the Biblical standards. God isn’t looking for perfection, but rather, progress. And yes, there will be days where we just don’t hit on all cylinders and our ugly human side shows up all too often. 

This definitely makes it a challenge to be a Christian and carry the burden of the greatest man to ever walk the Earth. It can be tiring at times and create unwanted stress and anxiety. Type in anxiety, fear, worry, control and fret with Bible verses into Google and 50-plus scriptures will pop up immediately. In faith, I think, I’ve said many of these powerful scriptures over-and-over through some difficult times, which are always comforting and powerful, but there are times when I just don’t feel like it and try to tackle things on my own. Wise? No! Human and flawed? 100 percent! Do I believe God can heal me of these things, absolutely, but if he chooses not to I know this will be a constant battle for me. 

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." -2 Corinthians 12:9

To the non-Christian, they are constantly watching, and often times don’t understand what it means to be a follower of Christ. Most think it’s about following a set of rules that no one can live up to, and if you don’t practice what you preach or live legalistically or by the letter of the law, well then, we are a bunch of hypocrites, gossips, and phonies (all three are actually true of us). 

As Christians, we will blab back with the usual it’s about a relationship, not religion or quote some scripture that carries zero meaning to most. 

Even some proclaiming Christians believe it’s about what you do that earns your ticket to Heaven, or simply by being a good person. What is a good person anyway? Who says what a good person is? Do we make it up to fit our narrative? Is there a hierarchy or point system? In other words, under this thought process, we would all be our own gods. 

Selfishness, get mine, do you, make yourself happy, follow your heart...do these all sound familiar? They should as the world vomits it all over the place. However, for the Christian, this just isn’t Biblical. None of it! People will call us hypocrites and all sorts of things, perhaps, and even make fun of us, but that doesn’t and shouldn’t change what we truly believe to be the Truth.

People of this world aren’t going to look at what we say, but rather what we do. Will we always be on point? Absolutely not and when we mess up and screw up we should be the first to apologize, the first to extend grace, mercy, and forgiveness. We need to just be honest with people and stop acting like we have it all together. Nothing pushes people further away from a cause then presenting something that never seems attainable. 

Why would I want to connect with someone that struggles with nothing? We don’t connect with people by impressing them, but rather through our struggles and weaknesses. You will never connect with people by hammering them with scriptures, using language that is mostly foreign to them, or try incredibly hard to present yourself as perfect. We have to make a connection by being REAL people. Just because I’m a Christian doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with worry, anxiety, fear, stress, anger, guilt etc...I’m a sinful person, period. 

It’s hard to share the Gospel with someone or your testimony when your pride and view of yourself is better than the person you are talking to. The only difference between you and that person is the Gospel was presented to you and by God’s love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness you received salvation. Trust me, it was nothing you did and nothing I did. If it weren’t for God, I would be completely hopeless. Now that He has opened my eyes, I can truly see that, but I would’ve never been able to see that if it weren’t for people willing to get messy and connect on my level when I lived for solely Kurt Stubbs II. 

Would I have thought of myself as a good person? Sure. Did I grow up in the church? Yes. However, I was never made new and my eyes were never opened until I truly accepted Jesus into my heart. Churches don’t save us. Being a good person doesn’t save us. Reciting a prayer doesn’t save us. Doing good works won’t save us. I accepted Jesus into my heart, but it doesn’t change that I’m still a sinful person that is always one step from stupid. 

Here’s a truth...not everyone we attempt to connect with will want to reciprocate and that’s okay. There will be people that will reject you and that’s okay. You will never argue or opinion someone into changing their mind or beliefs. Only the God of this universe can change hearts, minds, and souls, and the truth is, not everyone will be open to the change. 

We are called to love and serve our neighbor, but that doesn’t mean they will react the way we want. We can share our Jesus story and the Gospel, but only God does the actual changing. We are simply called to love. There will also be times when God will use another person to connect with that very person that rejected you, and guess what, that’s okay. As Christians, we are all on the same team and when one person calls upon The Lord, we ALL should be rejoicing. 

Take Off the Mask

I’m just as guilty as the next person, but this is something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately, which is living behind an invisible mask. Pastor Jeremiah spoke on Love being “vulnerable” and the message really resonated with me. There was so much meat in this message, but ultimately it comes down to us masking our weaknesses. Don’t think so? Just cue up someone’s social media page. 

Get caught up on the entire message series “Love Is” right here. Trust me, Christian or non-Christian, you will be deeply enriched by this series. http://www.gracefellowship.cc/love-2018

Here’s a question I’m pondering...how many people does the world truly know?

My guess? Not many. We love to look like we have it all together. We take that picture 10 maybe 15 times until it looks just right, so we can post it on our social media page and make our lives portray something they aren’t simply to impress people that are likely doing the same thing. What does this create? Comparison, which is a whole other topic. We are comparing our masked life to someone else’s masked life, which likely makes both parties insecure about their real life.

 I truly believe there would be far fewer issues if we were just more open and honest about who we really are. No one can relate to our perfect picture, our perfect family, our perfect body, and our perfect family. The only thing they can relate to is “hey, I’m doing the same thing.” So, in turn, we all just live and love at surface level thinking if they knew who I truly was, they would never want to be around me. When the truth is, if they did know who you really were, they would likely find something they struggle with as well and want to interact with you even more. Instead, we hide from each other, because if people get too close, they may really get to know us and how embarrassing would that be (or so goes the lie that we tell ourselves). 

We all try so hard to cover up who we truly are that we might not even know who we actually are. I’m not saying to tell everyone you pass in the mall your deepest, darkest secrets, but we would all be better served by being real and honest with people about who we are and how we are doing. Let’s be honest, no matter how much we try to hide and cover up, God knows our true self.

Please, don’t do life alone, because you are too proud to offer up your weaknesses. Remember, there was only one perfect man and that was Jesus, so that means the rest of us have issues and likely many of them. So, if we all know that about each other, why do we spend so much timing running from them and hiding them? The simple answer is PRIDE. Pastor Jeremiah said, “pride drives what we highlight and what we hide.” It’s a double-edged sword. There are very few, if any, that would say I love to be vulnerable. 

Brother Paul speaks in 2 Corinthians about boasting in his weaknesses, yes, boasting (bragging). 

“Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.” -2 Corinthians 12:9

The good news is “salvation is found in weakness and vulnerability.” Until we see ourselves as flawed, sinners who are no better than anyone else we will never see our need for a Savior.  When we get real with ourselves, it’s only then, can we truly be able to see our need for Jesus. As Christians, we need to be real and honest with other people about who we really are, and despite our ugliness and sin, God still loves us and because of Jesus we are forgiven and have eternal salvation. 

I encourage you, to get out there and share your Jesus story, and be real and honest about who you are and what you struggle with. Remember, people want to connect with the real you, not someone they are impressed by or can never live up to. Truth be told, they are trying to live up to a lie, because that is not who we truly are. We are messed up, screwed up, and tangled up, but yet still loved and forgiven. That’s our Jesus! The Jesus that died for us, while we were still sinners knowing we may never love Him back. Brothers and Sisters, that is TRUE LOVE!

[ohioguru03]

Your past...can grow you

Does anyone else get haunted by their past? It’s like you can’t escape the things you’ve done, said, or been. The lies somehow keep popping in your head as if this is who you will always be despite not being that person at all in the present. 

Yeah...I thought so. Me too! 

This can be tiring when the lies constantly bombard us, and maybe for you, it’s not just the lies the enemy wants you to believe but perhaps another person in your life constantly reminding you of your past. Either way, please remember, none of that is from God. 

I’ve currently been reading through a devotional on the Bible app, which focuses on our past. This a small snippet that I wanted to share. 

The following is what Brittany Rust had to say about our past...

You might feel like your past has left you too broken to be of any use. You might feel so used and ashamed that God could never use someone like you. You’re not the only one because I’ve felt that. But these are lies the enemy wants us to believe to keep us down so that we won’t fulfill God’s purpose for our lives. Rebuke these thoughts and remind yourself of these scriptures we are learning about regarding our future!

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! -2 Corinthians 5:17

When God puts us back together there’s more than an external picture of being put back together like a broken vase, or the cleansing of red to white. God does an internal working in our heart, soul, and mind that is a healing of sorts as well.

He wants to reach down into the innermost parts of your soul where no one else can go to mend and fill with grace. To rid you of shame, guilt, sorrow, pain, insecurity, and more.

These are works only God can do; no human has the ability to fill your void and depths of the heart. 

There is nothing more valuable in this Universe to God than you. He sent His Son to die in your place and claim the victory over sin so that you would no longer have to live in bondage to your past. Step into what He has done and is doing in your life and live the purpose you are called to live.

Wow, aren’t those powerful words! We aren’t our past. God sent His Son to die for our past, present, and future sins and we should constantly be thankful and grateful for not having to pay the price for our sinfulness. It’s just crazy to think that God loves you and me that much! 

I pray you’ve found hope in this tonight as much as I have.