necroticarachnidism

[necroticarachnidism]

Really though, I do appreci8 you humoring him.

[necroticarachnidism]

No one tell hiim II called out the body horror corner

#I won't tell a soul. ::::)

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

i mean, im just being honest?

You always are.

8ut you’re also a sweetheart.

[necroticarachnidism]

Speaking of, though, I have given us all the weekend off, seeing as everyone is very on guard right now.

I intend to spend most of the time a 8it wine drunk.

#alcohol //

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

its okay, wwe cant all livve for drama

#plus youre stealthy! its your wwhole brand #so it makes total sense that you wwouldnt wwanna do anything remotely like this #but i havve the reputation of a maniac butcher so like. nothing is TOO OUT THERE for someone like me #you dont LIKE being knowwn because then you cant pull your brand of crime wwhich is honestly pretty cool

Aww, you flatter me.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

true! i do havve a brand to maintain here!

wwell, yeah - but i mean evveryone keeps trying to kill me anywway, so, i might as wwell? at some point you just reach a threshold wwhere you cant make your situation wworse no matter howw much bullshit you pull, and thats the point at wwhich you go buckwwild

...As much as I admire you, I don’t think I can envy that particular part of your infamy.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

unfortunately, no 

but i still havve hope!

#if you wwere the one planning this gag howw wwould you improvve it? 

You’re the only one who would think of doing something like this, Dualscar.

That 8eing said, you seem to 8e pulling it off as well as you can, assuming no one gets any 8old ideas and tries to kill you for it.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

HELL YEAH

treasonous shenanigans

god i cant believve theyre this petty! it wwas a good gag, let me livve!

Have you ever met a high8lood around here with a sense of humor?

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

god i wwonder howw cool my crimes are

im so fucking glad

wwhat do they think it is???

My memory of your crimes is that they were all very cool.

Shenanigans, as you intended.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

god fucking damn it. also, damn, that must be a fucking huge list - i knoww you wwerent being serious but i kinda wwanna see it because im sure i forgot something

oh, no - im just saying that i nevver once intended to kill him, evven if it wwould be fun. but if i wwanted to, i wwould havve succeeded! and noww they must think ivve failed twwice! or, like….actually i dont knoww wwhat they think, since the fake blood kind of pushed it to charades, as intended.

I was 8eing serious. Not a8out the sneering, of course, 8ut they should have everything that’s 8een formally filed against you all in one place somewhere or another.

You merely trying to make everyone 8elieve you harmed the Emperor is a 8etter scenario for them than if you actually harmed him 8ut did not finish the jo8, so most imperially trusted news sources have not spread the idea that you have any real intent to kill him. They’re still fucking pissed, 8ut they don’t 8elieve it’s an actual attempt at regicide.

#I 8elieve I would find myself having to partake in the strangling too #So please do not

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

i knoww, i knoww, its a bit repetativve - i dont usually repeat stunts like this, but it’s been half a swweep and i thought they got ovver it. honestly, i just wwanted to make it not a big deal anymore.

damn it! but i dont ACTUALLY wwant to kill him!

They’re high8loods, Dualscar, they don’t get over anything unless they happen to forget or die with the memory. Somewhere in the empire they have a list of every crime you’ve committed since you were a wriggler, and I’m sure it’s keeper looks over it every few nights just to sneer.

As much as dismantling the government would make our lives easier, I don’t 8elieve you have to kill the Emperor simply 8ecause your plan did not work.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

ehehehehehe

oh, oh, oh, i pretended to kill the emperor again! they’vve gotta stop thinking its high treason EVVENTUALLY, right?

...Again, Dualscar?

8ut I can assure you that it will still 8e high treason no matter the amount of times you commit it.

[necroticarachnidism]

@trolljacksparrow

Dualscar, I am rather curious as to why the 8ounty on your head has risen so sharply.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

oh excellent

any preferences wwhen it comes to things?

No, I’ll let you have first pick.

That’d 8e much more fun for me.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

…..thats such a fantastic idea

wwhat about the terms?

It would pro8a8ly 8e 8est to figure all that out after we have a suita8le target.

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌:

that just makes it that more fun!

Certainly ::::)

You know, if you’re that in touch with 8etting rings already, and that 8ored, perhaps we could simply start with something they think you might 8e going after? See who can get there first?

[necroticarachnidism]

trolljacksparrow‌: 

absolutely

#wwould wwe bet?

If you’re willing.

Not much of a gam8le without a reward, wouldn’t you say?