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Miles is ONCE AGAIN here with the jokes

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IM SO SICK OF YOU ALL

No nuance allowed. please share for a bigger sample 💕💕💕💕💕

*by eat i mean how do you prefer your cereal.

#cold ???? its a meal of convenience im not warming up milk

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if you're wondering why THIS tiktok ban bill made it through the senate unlike last time...

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hey girl i mean any pronouns

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I love the phrase "they get along like a house on fire". It's perfect. You and me have perfect chemistry and it's setting off the carbon monoxide detectors. People are calling emergency services to get us to stop being so chummy. Someone died

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most important thing to remember about being a woman is if youre married you have to go under the covers with your husband and laugh cutely and play wrestle so when you die to progress the narrative he can remember it in slow motion montages

#saw a tiktok where a girl talked abt her photo inspo / the mindset she curates her insta photos for and literally #called it the dead wife pose #tbr all her pics look great it works so well with her

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#fave

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I need to go to the library (it's 9pm)

#mina mumbles #i need to pay for a library card (5 dollars) #funniest thing EVER btw some friends and i in middle school made the TREK to the library #and when asking how much it costs to get a library card we were told we needed a parent or 18 older (we were like 14) #it was so so funny #btw we did not get library cards none of our parents wanted 2 stick around the second our hangout time was over

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So we all know that Tumblr is US-centric. But to what degree? (and can we skew the results of this poll by posting it at a time where they should be asleep?)

Reblog to increase sample size!

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Animal Crossing: New Leaf (2012)

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guy sitting in front of me in class was vandalizing wikipedia and i kept reverting his edits as soon as he made them and he couldn't figure out why it was happening

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"Would you peel an orange for me?"

I would peel a pomegranate for you.

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“unhand me” is so good. and always appropriate to say. like literally unhand me

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whenever i say “something just happened.” it 100% is a sonic snapcube dub reference. btw

#as a hot sauce enjoyer i add hot sauce to everything #thank u sonic snapcube dub for language

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just curious as they're always things i've never questioned just doing but people in my life are often surprised that i don't mind doing them alone

🔁 pls reblog for sample size

#would love to do things alone ♡ #alas .

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honestly the discourse on this site is so bad that I have a new hot take: if you use tumblr at all fuck you