mamonthemoon

[mamonthemoon]

[mamonthemoon]

[mamonthemoon]

#weekend

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[mamonthemoon]

[mamonthemoon]

[mamonthemoon]

how is trump alive?? like hes rlly gone thru his whole life like That …. and no one has ever just fuckin decked him?? gave him the ole one two? knocked his lights out??? incredible

[mamonthemoon]

by Kagechiyo

[mamonthemoon]

I have a hole in my heart

That's why I can't pursue anything that I start

Wholeheartedly

[mamonthemoon]

11:11

It is dark. I mean, the path ahead of me- I cannot see. I was made happy and strong when I decided to pursue CCS next fall in 2020. My burdens of the future collapsed into strength and worry free. I feel burdened by poverty and aloneness,no path, just existing working to get through each day to the next- for what? I am glad Sagittarian is here.. He has given me attention and therefore love, by his engagement and intentions. "I don't want you to feel sad" he said, we were downstairs seated playing cards and I was down. I had been blocked from Ayla again. He has since connected with me two more times, coming forth more than I would expect, makes me feel good. He shared with me something terrible happened to his baby cousin. He had sat down next to me, I was sitting by myself at a large otherwise empty table, reading a story assigned by Jacob that was particularly boring at that point, and it took a little focus to continue reading with him next to me, not sure what to say to him. I really just want to give him affection, simply. I have no words really, it is up to him to initiate.. He is a fire sign.. Fully capable of that, I suppose. It has gone well and steady. I don't seek out his attention I am just present in whatever I am doing, wherever I am. I did ask him if he was bored, as he walked again through the cafeteria, I was the only one in there. "No are you? Come play cards" so I did. Two women and a coworker were down there also, with some kids doing their own play thing. We played UNO and I sucked at it, it being slightly different than when I had played as a kid. He had won, then came over behind me and with a lot of energy played for me, his arms wrapped around me. Teehee. They're like come on, let her play, but I didn't care I had already given up on winning it was inevitable I'd lose at that point it was just comforting and random and silly and over the top yang energy haha. He can be stoic, quiet, pensive, reserved, to exuberant, wild, silly, immature, to authoritative and serious. I like that. More personalities in one, a full range, spanning the spectrum. Wonderful. I found out, because he told me, he's in graduate school and has two degrees already. He asked me if he seems like he would. I want to ask him why he asked me that. I want to talk to him more. I hope the words for the conversation I've thought of while alone come to me when I am with him again. MAY the conversations I want to have with him seamlessly flow. And if they don't, I'll just look at him, into him. Perhaps he will say what? Or, perhaps he will enjoy it and not have a word to say. I keep imagining going up or down the steps and pushing into him and kissing his neck. It is a recurring fantasy, a short little one. Short but sweet. I can't obsess over him, because I don't believe or have hope. Its healthy. Alone in bed I have a few times imagined him holding me, although its a vague one. I have read that it is good to imagine having, being, doing, that which you desire. To not desire in the way that is longing in lack.

[mamonthemoon]

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[mamonthemoon]

Catch my tears

So they don't make my pillow wet

Drop my fears

But I haven't quite made it yet

[mamonthemoon]

Congratulations are in order for a success in your life recently.

The Six of Wands is a card of triumph and victory and says that currently you are in a place in your life where you have the right to feel proud. Of course, too much pride can get in your way, so you want to be sure you aren’t getting over-confident but all in all things are looking up for you. Typically this card will appear in a reading after some sort of test of wills. It is not a fluff card that represents small successes. Rather, this is a time of congratulations on something larger in your life. You can feel proud that you have put forth your best effort.

 You are the master of your own destiny and your actions alone have set you on the correct path.

The card is very individualistic with a strong emphasis on what you have done correctly. Now is a time to be proud in yourself but not everything is roses. Understand that your success may attract negative attention by others who are jealous or envious of your achievements. Steer clear from those that would potentially want to see you knocked down a couple of pegs and secretly root for your failure. There is always that one person who is dissatisfied with their own lot in life that will not be happy for you. The Six of Wands serves as a reminder that not everyone around you can be taken at face value.

This is also a time in which you may feel an expansion emotionally or spiritually. You may feel a high from the rush of adrenaline for conquering the issues in your life as of late. Do not allow your confidence and joy to get too carried away. The battle that you have faced is over and you have succeeded. Allowing your exuberance to knock you off your guard in other areas can be detrimental, especially in court or legal battles.

The Six of Wands in Work and Wealth The Six of Wands is a card representing gain and wealth financially. In this card it shows that the momentum of your money is moving in a direction of success. Whatever you are doing right now, keep on doing it! With the energy around you there is a lot of luck and you will continue to see an upswing. Because of your success you still have to be reminded that there may be others that are not as happy to see you succeed as you are. With money and wealth of any kind, also come people that want to take advantage or use you for their own financial gain. Do not allow people to grasp on to your coattails at this time as their actions can end up brining you down. Focus on your own finances and work situations based on YOUR actions. Do not rely on a team to bring you prestige. Now is a time to let yourself shine. It is not selfish to want to get ahead and there is nothing wrong with guarding your work and ensuring that you get the credit that you deserve!

[mamonthemoon]

The Queen of Wands tarot is the card that represents warmth and comfort. It signifies truthfulness and generosity. It also indicates exuberance, determination, and vibrancy.

It means being kind, patient, faithful and nurturing. It also signals a time to be intuitive and well-liked.

The Queen of Wands is sitting on her throne while holding a long wooden wand in one hand, and a sunflower in the other.

These objects symbolize faithfulness, warmth, and nourishment, as well as fertility, life, and happiness.

The black cat that sits by the Queen’s feet represents her hidden dark side and her strong and independent nature.

On top of her throne, there are two lions etched on it, which symbolize the strength, just like the Knight of Swords, and the fire, just like the King of Wands, that the Queen possesses.

The Queen of Wands tarot represents strong feminine energy. She is fearless and will not walk away from any challenge.

She is a powerful leader who has a strong sense of focus to achieve all that she sets out to do.

Just like the Queen of Wands, you are strong, courageous, and independent. You can take care of yourself and you can make things happen. Even if the odds are against you and even if you have very limited resources.

You are relentless and talented. You are focused on your goals. But you still manage to be a well-liked, nice, and optimistic person.

The Queen of Wands tarot also indicates that you live a very busy and energetic life. Your energy is contagious and this is what makes you such an effective and natural leader.

You actively inspire other people with your actions and your confidence.

The Queen of Wands tarot asks you to be brave and bold in your endeavors. You know the path that you want to take, and you have never been so excited or optimistic.

The only downside to this tarot card is that the Queen of Wands can be stubborn at times, especially if you’re too focused on completing a goal.

You can still feel symptoms of burnout. You are not as invincible as you think.

 Queen of Wands tarot can represent yourself or someone who has a lot of fire and energy in her. She can be a good friend who is steadfast and loyal.

She can be a boss whose leadership and focus you admire. She can be a public figure who has an admirable humanitarian spirit.

The Queen of Wands tarot is one of the most positive cards that you can get. It indicates that you will accomplish a lot of things, and impress a lot of people.

It signifies your ability to lead and inspire without forcing people.

It represents your natural gift to make people feel good about themselves and discover their own gifts.

It symbolizes how a sense of balance is needed in your life so that your spirit can grow and be nurtured.

The Queen of Wands tarot wants you to stop for a while and think about this: What gifts has the universe blessed you with?

Do you make good use of these gifts to make yourself grow and inspire change in others?

[mamonthemoon]

Benefits of Hemp Protein

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[mamonthemoon]

Nexplanon Day 1

June 1, 2019. YAY! IM FREE!

I am happy.  My arm hurts. There is a mighty bruise, I couldnt quite capture a photo that does it justice, with the tablet I’ve been using, although I tried for a good ten minutes.  So, my side effects seem to be INCREASED APPETITE.. but maybe this is due to my sudden decrease in nausea.  I reached for coffee, but that is doing me no favors.  Nor is sugar or the great amount of carbs I am consuming.  I look forward to eating healthy as I choose soon!  I was proud of myself yesterday I walked to the store with $1.75 and spent $1.41 or so and got 1 banana, 1 orange, and a slice of watermelon! I was happy.

NEXPLANON

Nexplanon contains the active ingredient etonogestrel, which is a synthetic form of the naturally occurring female sex hormone, progesterone. Etonogestrel is released continuously into your bloodstream from the implant.

So far, I feel better, because my nausea is gone from my previous condition.  So I have not had time to be natural and hormone free, I went right into having the implant inserted into my arm because it was available to be done that day and free! So we will see.  I am really hoping I dont gain weight and if I do gain weight, enough to stop fitting into my clothes and be noticable, I WILL get it removed.  I have seen mixed reviews.  At first I read the most recent reviews on WebMD, all of which were negative, then after a few pages it skipped to the very last review, which is then did again, when I clicked to show the most favorable reviews, or any other type of relisting the reviews.

Cant beat over 99% effective.  I wanted a hormone free birth control method, but since I get infections super easily, spermicide that is to be used with diaphragms just didn't seem to be a good option, i have always hated the word, and my older friend tried it with horrible results as well. So no. Sooooo.  Implant in my arm, major bruising, its kinda cool, but i dont like the hurty, and it is close to the surface, and I feel like i can feel the hormones being released which is unpleasant, but not compared to what I have gone through the past two months.

WE SHALL SEE

But, I feel more focused, I am reading more, want to walk more, am not fatigued from walking up the stairs, not nauseous. I do not feel emotional or suicidal. But I feel like it is Very possible I could gain a lot of weight is this pattern with my appetite continues. The women in the reviews stated they had no change in lifestyle, said they were not eating more or different or changing their exercise and some exercised more even.  But there are mixed reviews.

WE SHALL SEE.