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lost-mokoko · 2 years

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Somewhere, Someone

Armen/Reader (no pronouns mentioned)

Tags: fluff, ANGST, canon compliant so unhappy ending :(

Spoilers: Luterra/Lostwind Cliff (major spoilers), Rohendel (no major spoilers)

Words: 2300

!!!I'M OPEN FOR REQUESTS YOU GUYS!!!

You find yourself floating in nothingness. You shouldn't be here. Not when so much is at stake.

In an attempt to get back to your senses you only get further and further washed away from consciousness. Memories mingle with dreams. Soon you cannot even distinguish between what was and what is.

You feel safe. A dying voice whispers you shouldn't. For a second you want to listen to the voice. You cannot feel like this.

Somewhere, someone is calling your name.

But moments pass and with it your resolve of defiance. Why would you even want to fight? Your body feels drowsy and heavy, the adrenaline of a battle you cannot remember finally dissipating along with any thoughts that are left inside of your mind. You welcome the break with open arms, letting go of anything that ties you to this body.

Are you... dying?

The thought startles you and your eyes flutter open in alarm. For a second all you can do is blink against the bright light basking the room you are in. You hold your breath while the world around you finally comes into focus, a gentle breeze caressing your skin.

You're in bed.

You're home.

Right next to you lies Armen, one arm carefully wrapped around your waist, the other serving your head as a cushion. His face is completely relaxed, a few strands of blond hair falling over eyes that remain closed for the time being.

He looks beautiful in the golden light of the rising sun flooding through the open windows. Your chest feels heavy with emotions you cannot place. You're not sure why, but you really missed him.

Swallowing down a knot in your throat you scoot even closer towards Armen, enveloping him in a tight hug. He stirs a little, returning the gesture by tightening his own grip with a small sigh, but otherwise doesn't react. With your bodies pressed against each other you can feel the steady rise and fall if his chest, hear the rhythmic beat if his heart, and relish in the comforting warmth he emits.

The next breath you take is a shaky one. You can't really remember, but you must have had a bad dream. If you could, you would hide from the world like this forever. Feeling safe, some of the tension finally leaves your muscles, although you cannot fully get rid of the anxiety cursing through your veins.

You remain like this for a few long moments before Armen stirs once more. He makes a small noise, surprised by the close proximity, but instantly relaxes again.

"Good morning" he mumbles in a sleepy voice. It's as soft as the lips that gently press against your head. It's as melodic as you remember. You want to answer, but all words die down in the back of your throat. Why does it feel as if you haven't heard his voice in months?

The silence between you stretches on for just a bit too long, so Armen nudges you carefully and adds, "Did you sleep well?". Already you can hear the concern in his voice. It's incredible how quick he picks up on your moods.

"I-..." You start, but once again the words don't make it past your lips. Even if, you wouldn't even know how to answer Armen's question in the first place.

Did you sleep well?

It almost feels like you didn't sleep at all.

Instead you decide to pull away and for the first time that morning, your eyes meet his.

Hazy pictures flash in front of your mind while you get lost in pools of bright blue. You feel like Armen was there, inside those memories, and then he wasn't. There's a sense of sorrow clutching your heart, and the more you try to grasp for these pictures, the further away they got.

The call of your name anchors you back in reality. One of Armen's hands comes up to wipe away tears you weren't even aware of. Your face feels warm where his touch lingers and as if in a trance you take his hand into yours, caressing it softly.

Things you want to say float in your head.

'Good morning.'

'I had a bad dream.'

'I missed you'

'I'm sorry.'

'Did you sleep well?'

'I'm happy to see you.'

What comes out of your mouth is "I love you".

It feels rushed to you, like if you didn't say it now you might never will. It feels too meaningful for a casual morning.

Armen's eyes open slightly, a blush creeping into his cheeks. "You-...", he shyly avoids eye contact, "I didn't expect that."

"Me neither." You whisper. Despite the new wave of tears that you still had no explanation for, you feel relieved. You look at Armen, the way his hair is disheveled and his simple shirt is fitted around his shoulders. His eyes are anywhere but you, his hand still in yours.

Your chest swells with affection. You will hold this moment close to your heart. A smile wants to creep onto your face, but you need him to see it, too. He needs to know what words cannot express right now.

Carefully you bring your second hand to his face, leading him back to look at you. Armen doesn't object, despite being flustered. When his eyes meet yours for the second time that morning, the unmistakable look of worry crosses his face again. Even so, you were captivated by him. Being near him is as comforting as it is invigorating and slowly you can feel your heart rate picking up.

Your eyes flutter to his lips which doesn't go past him unnoticed. Armen's brow raises in question and he chuckles slightly. Your breath catches in your throat at the sound.

"Seriously, you're confusing me!" he exclaims, although there was nothing but affection behind his voice.

Your hand is still on Armen's cheek and you absentmindedly brush away a strand of his hair. "I'm sorry." you finally say, pulling away. You exhale nervously, trying your best to chase away the last remnants of sadness. "I woke up feeling unwell but..." you stop to take another moment to admire the man in front of you. A beaming smile spreads on your lips, your heart feeling like it could jump right out of your chest. "...I'm okay now."

Armen visibly relaxes, returning the smile with one of his own. He takes both of your hands into his and squeezes them gently. His eyes glisten with emotions too intense to comprehend. "I'm glad. I don't like seeing you sad."

The world around you flashed in colors much darker than the white of your shared room. The light breeze now suddenly brought the smell of chaos with it. There was no bed, only the blood soaked ground. Your hands were covered in it, too. Armen lied in front of you, trying to catch his breath through gritted teeth. He looked at you with a week smile. You're only faintly aware of the tears mingling with the red. "I don't... like... seeing you sad."

The images are gone before you even realize they were there. A painful pressure is building up in the back of your head, but you're quick to push it all away. You want to enjoy this moment a bit more.

Armen is still gazing fondly at you and this time it's you who catches his gaze falling to your lips. Just for a second - then your eyes meet again, a shared sense of shyness between you. Both of you instinctively move closer. You're carefully approaching, almost painfully slow, until he's only a couple inches away. The air is think with emotions, yet the moment feels fragile. If you were to move too suddenly, if you'd make too loud of a noise, you're afraid it might all shatter.

You swallow down your fears, all thoughts once again dissolving when you feel his breath fanning over your skin. Armen's hand sneaks up to your face again, holding you in place. Your eyes fall shut as he finally closes the gap between you.

The soft lips that touch yours couldn't be a greater contrast to the sharp pang of excitement that sparks in your chest. By now your heartbeat is deafening in your ears, drowning out the birds singing in front of the window.

Armen's kiss is gentle, of course it is. Yet it doesn't fail to convey emotions too powerful for words. It carries longing and passion and with each second that passes you hope Armen feels as loved as you do. Nothing mattered more than that.

When you eventually break apart, your body is on fire and your mind is a raging storm of meaningless words. Amidst it all you scream at your brain to hold on to this moment until your dying breath. You know you must have kissed him before but when you try to remember, your mind goes blank.

Somewhere, someone is calling your name. Instinctively, your eyes wander away from Armen and towards the window. You can't see anything. Not even the sky.

You swallow nervously. While you aren't sure whether this was your first kiss or not, it suddenly feels like it could have been the last.

All at once the pain in your head returns with vengeance. A disturbed expression contorts your features, but you manage to push away the pressure and dread building up inside of you. You want to enjoy this moment for just a bit longer.

"What's wrong? Are you hurt?" This time Armen had noticed your peril, sounding alarmed. You grimace a little, closing your eyes against the bright white room.

When you open them again you found yourself on a grassy field in the middle of the night. You had fallen to your knees, body weak and dripping with sweat. You felt sick, your vision swimming in and out of focus. Instantly Armen had dropped to your side, his frantic eyes scanning for injuries. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

The pictures were instantly forgotten again. What lingered was a feeling of nausea and the memory of hating that day.

"Yeah, yeah." You fail to sound dismissive, "Just a little headache." You try to ignore the fact that your room is strangely empty, lacking any color or detail. It doesn't matter. All you want is to focus on this moment with Armen; please, just a bit longer.

Armen pouts at your answer, sending you a sympathetic look. "You should have said something! I'll go get you medicine." He gives you a little forehead kiss before untangling himself from the bedsheets.

A sudden burst of panic freezes you in place. "Don't leave!" You blurt out without thinking. Your skin still tingles where he kissed you.

Armen stops in his tracks, turning around to look at you in a mixture of surprise and amusement. "What's with you today?" He laughs.

Once more he turns his back to you. Once more you're losing him.

Somewhere, someone is calling your name.

The wind has picked up; outside the window it's now raining. It smells like farewell.

"Armen! Please!" You try again, but he walks away further. "Don't go- wait! Don't go!" Every attempt to move is futile. An invisible force is keeping you chained in place. You can only watch as Armen approaches the door, taking with him all warmth and light. In the now dim room, his hair almost looks white.

How do you tell him that if he leaves he won't be able to come back?

You're crying again. Behind the door, the world simply fades into darkness.

"Armen..." you try, one last time, "stay, just for a bit longer... please..."

He stops and turns, one last time.

The door falls shut so loudly it startles you. Darkness takes you into a suffocating embrace, the room you were in now gone. And before you can even start to feel your way around, you lose your footing suddenly falling, and falling, and falling and-

"Armen!" You snap your eyes open and gasp loudly, your lungs seeking air as if you'd been drowning. Vision hazy, you barely manage to make out the branches of a gigantic tree above, as well as two figures watching over you.

"It's Aven, actually, but close." The taller figure said, his sandy hair and glasses coming into focus. He's been calling your name, you realize.

Next to him the little Bambiri girl Turan looks at you with big worried eyes. A groan slips past your lips when previously forgotten memories return, and with them the soreness of your muscles.

Aven is explaining the situation to you but you barely understand anything. You're in Elzowin's Shade and by the gods you do not want to be here. The only thing keeping you from bursting into tears is the dull pain from pressing your nails into your palms. What a cruel dream that was.

You allow yourself a moment to just exist. The feeling of something irreplaceable being lost gnaws a hole of ever growing size into your chest. You had been reminded not only of the things lost, but also of the things most unattainable.

For the first time since that day on the Lostwind Cliffs, you're realizing just how hollow have become. You have lost countless battles, but never have you felt this defeated. Your mind is in shambles and somehow the only coherent sentence it seems to be able to spew out is that you once again didn't get to say goodbye.

Gradually, your despair gives in to anger. You are angry with yourself, angry at the demons, angry at the world.

It is right there that you decide to pour all of your resentment into the void of your heart. Brelshaza would pay for this. Kharmine would too.

And at the very end of this, Regulus would fall under your hands as well.

___________________________________________

GONNA CROSSPOST THIS SOON ON AO3!!! I'm on mobile rn and it's late and everything is confusing

I DIED FOR A HOT MINUTE but i said i would make content for lost ark so here i AM. This is my first time ever publishing fanfiction, can you believe it. Criticism is very welcome AS WELL AS REQUESTS. Honestly, this was supposed to be pure fluff but :)

i actually HATE unhappy endings but in my head they find each other after all is said and done. EXPECT MORE ARMEN STUFF BECAUSE IM A SAD B. The two flashback scenes that i wrote are actually ideas that i am planning on writing one day! Also I've never written a kiss scene and ngl i got SO flustered. IF I DON'T ACCIDENTALLY DELETE MY BLOG AGAIN I'm planning on posting some FLUFFY summer holiday headcanons soon, lmk if you have any special wishes for characters you wanna see.

#lost ark #lost ark armen #lost ark fanfiction #lost ark fanfic #lost ark armen/reader #armen fluff #armen angst #armen x reader #armen come home its been too long

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