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kekabumi · 4 years

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Stories About Women from Women

by MIMI JAMAL

When I was 8, mama and I went to a SureHeboh Carnival. There was a colouring contest, and she signed me up for it. After I was done, we left to enjoy the rest of the carnival. I wasn't feeling confident about it so I didn’t care about winning.

An hour later, we went back to the tent curious to see who won. All the winners took home their prizes except for the grand prize. Apparently, the winner was missing because it was me! I won the contest!

“Anak mama ni memang berseni. Boleh jadi artis, kena berani sikit. Buat apa pun, mama tahu Mimi boleh buat,” said mama.

And that’s how “Mimi boleh buat” propelled me to become a creative, and the woman I am today. It is something I hold on to, in whatever I do. So, kalau Mimi boleh buat, you can do it too.

by KASIH AZHAR

My mother is probably the only other person in my life who still deals with my tantrums from time-to-time during our arguments. Some time ago, she let one rip and told me,

"Listen, if you're going to be a quitter, then don't allow the novelty of being a woman to become a crutch for yourself. Here's the reality: no one's going to congratulate a woman for the things that they can do, but they'll remember the things that they can't."

by NANI ZUL This is a story about the most thoughtful person I know. I call her Ibu. She’d remember the little things - like my favourite ice cream flavour and ayah’s favourite mug.

Ibu’s most inspirational advice to me is simple: Be grateful. No matter where you are in life, always be grounded and thankful for what you have. She always reminds me that when you fill your life with gratitude, good things will flow your way without you even realising. by LYLATUL QADRINA

Relentless, unbreakable and zealous. The qualities of the first feminist in my life. Hardworking, independent and selfless, I embody her spirit to navigate life.

Mama is not one to talk you out but the examples she sets are loud enough. I persevere with her prayers, an aid de memoire for a brighter future. This is to Joycee, and other women like her out there. You are the spark that keeps me going!

by CONNIE KHONG

My mom sets good example by living it out - so she doesn't really dispense advise per se. Even when I ask for her thoughts, she would say

"You know yourself well so, you can decide what's best for yourself."

All qualities considered, what I'm most inspired by her is that she is a very giving person. That's how I learn not to be berkira, kedekut or greedy about things. For her, as long as we have the means to give, we should. And if we have food on the table, we have enough.

She is the woman who taught me to always give.

by JIPA

When I got 6A’s for PMR, I invited my parents to attend the Majlis Anugerah Kecemerlangan. They agreed, but only if my mom could cheer loudly for me when I am called on stage. Of course, it was a joke. One that touched my heart because of how proud she was.

Ibu is a woman of many things, but having unbreakable patience would be her superpower. It’s still vivid in my head how every time I get my exam results, she would remind me,

“Tak payah sedih kalau tak dapat A atau nombor satu dalam class, nanti kita belajar sama-sama, ibu ajar awak. InsyaAllah boleh berjaya.”

And so I aspire to be the woman that she is, and love unconditionally.

by LIZZIE ZANY

My mom is always... studying. She has never stopped studying for as long as anyone knows her! She pursued masters after my sister and I was born before pursuing to become a very good Biology lecturer after giving birth to my brother. She became more and more passionate about education with every certificate and achievements.

Being a mom of 3, she did a lot for us. Aside from providing for the family as a wife and a mother, she excels in her career with other kids in mind (her students). I don't think it's easy being a mother neither do I think it's easy being a woman in STEM either. But she did both anyway.

Years have passed, and she's still, yes, studying - finishing up her PhD now. She's always excited to tell me what she's been experimenting with, her little projects and lab results. She taught me to be strong by being the best example I could ever asked for.

My mom pushed through so much in her life and as far as I know, she never gave up. When I'm down in the dumps and I feel like breaking, I think of her strength and it keeps me going.

When she didn’t have the means to get to the stars, she made sure it was a pretty good trip to the moon, for all of us.

#iwd2020 #kekabumipresents

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kekabumi · 4 years

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#iwd2020 #kekabumipresents

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kekabumi · 4 years

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The Big C

by Connie Khong

Cancer - something that seemed like it only happened in movies or that it is someone else's story and not my reality. Unfortunately, my first touch with cancer was when we found out that my beloved uncle, my mother's brother, was diagnosed with nose cancer. I was still in early secondary school, then my father suffered the same fate when I was in university.

Both experiences were different and yet so similar at the same time - but nothing could ever prepare me or my family for that. It was difficult to see your loved ones go through such a painful process, and at that point of time, you wish you can just, take away all their pain.

My Ah Pek had to undergo radiotherapy when chemotherapy didn't have much effect on his cancer anymore. He was such a jovial person and was set on enjoying life to the fullest when he found out he was diagnosed. He was set on beating cancer with all his might - but the treatment really took a toll on him. I was still too young to properly understand the stress and strain that my family was going through at the time - I knew it was always there, and most of the time, my coping mechanisms were to pretend like everything was okay. To treat him like nothing has changed so he wouldn't feel any different.

That one fateful day came when my dad picked me up from school, and he uttered those dreaded words: Your Ah Pek has passed away. I couldn't believe it. It seemed so unreal. It only hit me when I heard my Ama walk through the doors as she returns from the nursing home where he stayed at during his final days, wailing her heart out. I could never forget the look in her eyes, her sense of loss to lose her son. Only love can leave you feeling like that.

Years later, it happened again. This time, it was my beloved Papi. He was unwell for the longest time; he kept coughing and it felt like it wasn’t getting any better. We kept telling him to go to the doctors and have it checked out but he kept brushing it off and delayed the visit to the hospital. I guess fear was overwhelming for him - I think he had an inkling of what it was, he said he suspected that it might be cancer when everyone kept pushing him to go to the clinic. He was terrified to find out.

He eventually did - and the local doctor seemed anxious, and wasn’t happy with what he discovered. He said Papi's liver feels hard and that he suspects it might be something worse. He wrote a referral letter for us to take him to the hospital for another thorough inspection. They ran more tests before confirming that he was diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer. By then, it already spread to his liver.

Nothing prepared us for this - not even with the loss of my Ah Pek many years ago. Once again, I find myself running away when things get difficult. I didn't know it then that I was coping differently - I was staying on campus at the time and could decide when to head home when I am ready to face it all. I didn't want my Papi to see me sad or at loss for words when he wasn't getting better. I felt the need to be the positive one so that he doesn't give up on this battle.

Whenever I'm back to see him or to accompany him for his visits, he would always worry about me and kept telling me that I need not be there. Yet at the same time, he would say that he is glad that I am around. It was the only way I knew how to support him; to be present for a man of little words.

His chemotherapy worked but only for a short while. He finally decided that he didn't want to go through it - so we chose to respect his wishes.

When he stopped, it all happened so quickly. I remember patting his back when he was coughing from drinking water one night. I was packing for a short trip to Japan with my university mates and he couldn't sleep - so I fetched him some water and told him if he needed anything he could just informed me. He said he's fine and not to worry about him. He was too sleepy to say goodbye when I left for my flight the next day. I didn't know it then, but that was the last time I would see him alive.

Throughout the short trip, I got updates from Mami that he wasn't doing so well and that the doctors told us to prepare ourselves. I was telling her that I'll cancel all my trips upon returning to spend more time with him. Short of a couple days of me returning, I got that dreaded phone call from her: Papi breathed his last.

It felt unreal to be back in the house when I landed and he is not there. It felt unreal to see him lying in the casket. Everything felt unreal. But at the same time, that's how much I love Papi. As much as it hurts to know he is not around anymore, I also find comfort in knowing he is no longer in pain. Both Papi and Ah Pek dealt with this bravely until the end.

It's not easy battling cancer and it's not easy supporting someone through that as well. But, it's important that we do; that we show up and be there for them all the way during this difficult time. It's our way of being brave and giving them courage to carry on the fight.

And it's so important to go for health checks, and get yourself tested. Early detection saves lives. Cancer does not necessarily translate to death, if detected early. So, please don't sit around and worry about the what-ifs and instead, take an active role to play a part for your health.

Find out more and learn more on how you can help prevent cancer at worldcancerday.org.

#cancer #worldcancerday

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kekabumi · 4 years

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by Connie Khong

Growing up in a non-typical Chinese household, Chinese New Year always bring about different meaning to me. Why is it different? Because in the eyes of most Chinese in Malaysia at least, I am considered a ‘banana’. It means I’m yellow on the outside and white on the inside. In other words, I only look the part - but inside, I’m not the least bit.

I still speak a sprinkle of Hokkien in my household. And I speak Penang Hokkien so our Hokkien, similar to our cousins in Malacca, is smattered with Bahasa Malaysia. Except unlike a big percentage of my Chinese counterparts, I don’t speak the common Mandarin or the lingua franca of Kuala Lumpur : Cantonese fluently.

Thankfully, my late Papi's’ family is of Hakka-Cantonese descendents and accompanied with TVB dramas growing up, I ended up picking up a bit of Canto here and there. Not the best since I don’t speak it as much, but I can still order some food or drinks and attempt some bargaining at the resident kopitiam - teh c ngalat, mm koi!

I didn’t think my Chinese New Year or me not able to speak Mandarin makes me any less Chinese - until I got older and hung around with other Mandarin-speaking friends. It was only then it came to my realisation that I am a bit different because I lack the ability to read, write and speak the so-called common language and that also meant, there is a whole universe I couldn’t access - which is apparently the license to be true Chinese. Nevertheless, I tried not to let these things bogged me down or define me - after all we still held some traditions or must-do things and practices which still hold dear to me - as a true blue Chinese or not.

So here are some things I do know about Chinese New Year!

1. Apa tu makan besar Chinese New Eve?

- Similar to your malam Raya, this homecoming dinner is THE essence of the storyboards you see in most of the Chinese New Year ads. Everyone will gather once a year to catch up with each other. Even if you don’t talk throughout the 365 days, it’s definitely NOT fine to skip the reunion dinner (don't be disrespectful to the food!). This is where the ‘how are you’, ‘when are you getting married and when are you having kids’ questions will be bombarded. But really, whether you’re true blue Chinese or a yellow banana, this means family quality time of coming together - of homecoming. Which is why the dinner is known as reunion dinner, 团圆饭 (tuan yuan fan).

Over the years, I am learning more important vocabulary because it carries much meaning to the things I celebrate and helps me connect with it better - with my roots and to appreciate it all the more.

2. Pantangs are real!

- Well, I’m a second generation Christian and honestly, most pantangs don’t or shouldn’t really apply lah. For your infomation, second generation Christian means that your parents are the first to believe in the household and you’re the second to follow after them. Well, for my household, more than beliefs, it has been customary that we keep to making sure

a) we have lots of red things in the house

b) spring clean wayyyyy before the 1st day of Chinese New Year and that means

c) not sweeping the floor especially on the 1st day (my late Papi insisted on it but my mother cheekily suggested to vacuum this one year when she forgot to spring clean the few days before)

d) putting the (fake) plum blossoms or any other spring items and decorations up

e) the word ‘fuk’ is placed upside down at the door or walls.

3. The upside down ‘Fuk’

Hahaha, nope, not THAT F word but fuk 福. I may not be able to read a lot of Chinese characters because I’m a Kebangsaan kid since primary - but this is one of the few that I know by heart. We will place it upside down and not right side up to invite all the fortune, luck and happiness into the household and then, pour it out to all the guests that enters and leave the household. Another reason why I remember it is because it’s also the same character used for Hok in Hokkien.

4. Khong Family CNY Signature Dish

- Not all family serve the same food you know? Like how we have different versions of Laksa, different household serve different must-have dishes : special to that group. For example, Jiu Hu Char (Stir fried yambean with dried cuttlefish) is a must in my Hokkien household and because we have our Hakka grandmother on my late Papi’s side, we also serve these gorgeous Kau Bak or Khew Yuk : Hakka marinated 5 spice pork belly, steamed with round yam. They are sooooo good - our go-to signature Khong CNY dish!

We would plan what to prepare for Eve, First Day and back then when my Papi and his parents were still around, the 2nd Day family lunch as well. Usually First Day are more vegetarian friendly - because we have had so much meat on the Eve and for the religious ones, they will observe 1st and 15th of the month as vegetarian days so it’s only apt that we try to incorporate more vegetable options as well.

And food have good meanings to them as well - onomatopoeia! So, it’s really common to find Mandarin oranges, pistachios, fish, and certain vegetables like mushrooms because in their Chinese pronunciations, they sound like words that means happiness, gold, prosperity, luck and the likes. That’s why they are a must-serve during Chinese New Year and even more on other auspicious days for the Chinese community like weddings!

5. Red Packets - angpow mana?

- Contrary to popular beliefs, not everyone gets angpow and not everyone gives. The golden rule of thumb, is that if you’re married, then you have to start giving. Because it means, you’re finally an adult and is able to pass on the (financial) blessings to others - especially the younger ones. Well, the amount is up to you - but it really depends on the economy (nowadays, the minimum has increased from the heyday of RM2 per couple or per pax to about RM5 or RM10 these days) but, to be honest, it’s the thoughts that really counts. And while married couples generally don’t receive, their parents still can give to them if they want to. While unmarried older relatives can give money, they don’t put them in red packets. Then there are some practices where the younger but already working siblings will give to their older siblings as a form of respect. Though this is not as common, it’s being practiced. But generally, any older relatives can start giving - and yes, even you - the twenties and thirties year olds, if you’re working and if you have younger cousins or nephews and nieces, you can give them as well. Just don't put them in red packet if you’re not married yet.

6. #OOTD: Colour to wear

- The obvious colour would definitely be red! But anything that represents prosperity, money, luck is good too. So colours like gold, orange (because in Chinese pronunciation, it means gold), green and blue. If these colours are too strong for your liking, you can even opt for pink and salmon. Contrary to popular belief, we don’t all wear cheongsams or samfus during the celebrations anymore. It’s not really a common practice but it's still fun to put it on for the occasion! While most people these days are not as superstitious, to be safe, black and whites are a no-no as they are seen as inauspicious and related to funerals.

7. Balik kampung time!

It’s a common practice for the community to travel or make their way back to their hometown. I believe it’s the same for most of our non-Chinese friends when it comes to their day of celebration. I mean, it only makes sense to head back to where your grandparents and extended relatives are at - and for some, where you grew up in. If you’re married, you would have to follow your husband to celebrate 1st day at his parents’ place and only to return on 2nd day to yours. It's really all about planning so you can celebrate with each other’s family.

8. WIND AND WATER

And this brings me to my 8th (which also sounds like fatt (prosper) in Cantonese) and last point. It’s apt for me to end with feng shui - synonym to all things superstitious Chinese. And how specific dates bring extra ong and huat to you (dates to get married or return to work, hoi gong in Cantonese) in hopes that choosing a good day to do things, it will make everything go well.

For others who believe in feng shui and the likes, the zodiacs and fortune telling is also another important thing to start the year with. Some say if your zodiac is the zodiac year or is against the Taisui (something like a guardian God overseeing people’s fortunes) for that year, you’re going to have a very tough year ahead.

So yes, that wraps up a few of the things I know. I am still trying to learn and reconnect with things that most, if not all, Chinese that still practices even up to this day. And to me, the most important thing is family and homecoming. That’s really the essence of Chinese New Year which lasts until the 15th with more mini celebrations in between such as Everybody’s Birthday (Yan Yat) on the 7th and pai ti gong by the Hokkien community on the 9th and the end of it all, Chap Goh Meh on the 15th night where the singles will head out to the river/seaside to throw oranges with number in hopes to find their potential partner.

So, join us welcome the new year in the lunar/Chinese calendar. And no, for the last time, you can be a Christian / Muslim / Buddhist etc and still celebrate Chinese New Year because you’re still CHINESE.

From all of us at Kekabumi to your family, we would like to wish you a Huat-derful Chinese New Year and may this year brings you lots of joy and prosperity!

#chinese new year #banana #cny #malaysia #reunion dinner

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kekabumi · 4 years

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#kekabumipresents 21st Century Spy by LUST

Check out LUST's music video '21st Century Spy'! https://youtu.be/bN0ucb4nfXw

Directed by Shazwan Zulkiffli and Hakim Malik Original story by Lylatul Qadrina Produced by Lylatul Qadrina and Shazwan Zulkiffli Edited by Ari Adzmin Director of photography: Hakim Malik Assistant camera: Nurul Nazifa Art directed by Lizzie Zany Production designer: Mimi Jamal Production assistant: Kasih Azhar and Myra Alissa Starring Fadhli Masoot and Elena Laurel

#indie #malaysia #music video #kekabumipresents

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kekabumi · 7 years

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Gulab Jamun

Gulab Jamun is a popular dessert in the Indian subcontinent and our personalities are just as sweet and lovable as the dessert.

In conjunction with the Festival of Lights, Kekabumi presents: Gulab Jamun, a photo journal of 4 very different gulabos*, each with their own unique twist and flavour as we explore their take on being a Malaysian Indian.

*term of endearment

GULABO #1: ANJALI NIJJAR VENUGOPAL, 22 Artist, Actor, Poet, Freelance Publicist

“Is your name inspired from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai?” I threw the first question to break the ice.

“No,” she replied with a sweet smile. “I was born before that!”

Anjali, despite being young is a quadruple-threat. She’s an artist, actor, poet and a freelance publicist. Her artwork have been exhibited in Tokyo and she is as passionate as one can be. She also recently competed in SHORT+SWEET staged at Kuala Lumpur Performing Arts Centre (KLPAC) if she’s not performing at poetry gigs like ‘If Walls Could Talk’.

“I’ve always liked the stage,” she admits.

Born and bred in Sabah, Anjali pursued her tertiary education in Film & TV. Her favourite film is Scott Pilgrim vs The World and she described her style as a fine line between pastel goth and sporty.

As a theater actor, Anjali said that she has to open up and be vulnerable when she is on stage in order to put on a good show. The intense training she had during Theatre for Young People (T4YP) had allow her to do just that.

“I’ve become much, much, braver.” she added.

A lot of people would never guess that she’s actually a Sikh because to her, there is not enough Sikh representation in Malaysia even though there are a few Gurdwaras in KL itself.

“It’s also unfortunate that the Vaisakhi (a major religious celebration in Sikhism) is not given Public Holiday here. Sometimes I had to choose between classes or work and going to temple. I wish that wasn’t the case.”

Anjali, whose dream home would be a studio apartment where she can turn into a creative space wasn’t afraid to speak up about the struggles she had growing too.

“I used to not like my name because people was making fun of it when I was a kid. They made me feel like I’m horrible and ugly for being Indian.”

“It was not until I see the representation (of POC) in the western media that I thought to myself wow, I could actually look good in that (outfit).”

Anjali’s play “TIGA” will be staged at Five Arts Centre from 23rd – 26th November. Make sure you don’t miss it!

Instagram/Twitter: @pertatos Website: http://pertatos.blogspot.my/

GULABO #2: AZAAD, 25 Videographer

Azaad was 30 minutes late to our shoot but his personality is so bright we couldn't be upset about it. Our conversation started when we went to 7Eleven together to get some drinks and snacks. He told me that one day, he wants to prank the 7E guy too. Throughout our 15-minute walk, we talked about a lot of random things - from car drifting, to parkour, to suicide.

"Every day I wake up to be a better person than I was yesterday," he told me. "That's what keeps me going.”

Born in an Indian-Muslim family from Penang, the Media Technology graduate from SAE International emphasized on the importance of family by saying that there will never be a place like home.

“Growing up, my friends are 60% Chinese, 30% Indians and only 10% Malays but I have never experienced racial clashing. I see it happening around, but never to me.”

When asked about his thoughts on the minority in Malaysia – Indians especially, Azaad said that he wish the Indians realised how important they are as the people here in Malaysia and that they should never feel sideline. Azaad speaks fervently of his dissatisfaction with the IT and Medicine stereotype often imposed onto Indian individuals as he hope to see more Indians in the creative line of work.

While digging deeper into his own heritage, Azaad also enlightened us about what it means to be an Indian Muslim in Malaysia.

“I think the Indian culture is amazing. The heritage is really something to be proud of and celebrated. And the colours are just so beautiful” said Azaad. “However, one of two things people often ask when they find out that I’m Indian-Muslim is either: Which one of your parents is malay? Or are you a convert?”

As Azaad explains about the Indian Muslim community within Malaysia, we learnt that it is a small minority that often get mixed up with Mamaks, who are individuals of mixed Indian-Malay heritage. Azaad laments on the interchangeability of the Malay and Muslim identity, which gives way to a form of ignorance towards others that don’t fall under the same label.

Azaad notices that Indian Muslims are at risk of losing their unique culture due to the pressure of trying to fit into modern Malaysian society, but they may also be at risk of losing a part of their identity as well if they do not. As Azaad mentions, “If you can’t beat the rest, join the rest but of course there are those who still stay true to their roots.”

The enthusiastic 25 year-old who loves his current job told me that if not a videographer, he’d probably be in aviation as a fighter pilot or a professional motor sport driver if he ever runs out of creative juice. Well, I guess we have to wait and see what’s in store for this Penangite creative.

Instagram: @ahmedazaad

GULABO #3: VARSHA, 20 Musician, lawyer-to-be

When I first arrived at the studio, I noticed a girl with sharp face feature doing her make-up and I thought “Woah, she’s beautiful.” It took me awhile to approach her because not only she was doing her make-up, she also has this stern look that made me feel a little scared. But as the hour pass by and everyone was all warmed up, Varsha turned out to be a very pleasant person to have conversations with. And quite chatty too!

So when I had her to tell me a bit about herself, it was very surprising to know that this 20 year-old is currently pursuing her degree in law despite having a pure-science A-level qualification. So why the drastic change?

“Well, I’ve been learning science since I was 16 and the thought of having to spend the rest in my life in the lab is just not something I am quite comfortable with. I mean, I really, really, love Biology and all but maybe not as a professional.” she told me as we were hanging out at the balcony.

Three fun facts about Varsha that I learnt:

When she was 10, she had a skateboarding phase but never really got into it because she was just stoked to have Spiderman design on her skateboard instead of the actual thing.

When she was 13, her guilty pleasure show to watch is Keeping Up With The Kardashians (KUWTK)

She was obsessed with High School Musical (HSM) so much that she had posters all over her room that she has not yet taken down.

Varsha who views John Mayer as one of her sources of inspiration recently released two songs on her Spotify – ‘Real’ and ‘Fool for You’. But her achievements to this date definitely didn’t come easy.

“I feel like no matter how good I am, I will always have to push a bit extra in everything I do. For example, I did great in my SPM but not great enough to land me a scholarship because of the race quota. I totally understand that the majority should have more seats but yeah.” she explained.

To Varsha, Malaysia is a country where you have to conform to the majority. You are forced to follow the flow but if you are a salmon who swims upstream, that wouldn’t be too easy.

“Honestly, I don’t think coerce is good for you spiritually or mentally. I wish people can just be their own person regardless their preferences,” Varsha added. Well, we agree with you on that, girl.

Instagram & Twitter: @thatssovarsha Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/2X1RsyKi5IRhAPyKAa8o3m

GULABO #4: KEITH NOEL RAJ, 22 Musician

“Passionate. Rational. Naïve.”

Those were the words that came out of Keith’s when I asked him to describe himself in three words. Started playing music since he was 13, he told me he never learned how to read notes despite being able to play instruments well.

Throughout the photoshoot, Keith wasn’t the loudest person in the room but he exuberates this calm aura that made it easy to approach him. Young and talented, Keith believes that if you put in a lot of effort, time and details in what you do, you will be great at it.

Speaking of great, he will be releasing his EP really soon and we wish him nothing but the best!

“So what do you think about the Indians in Malaysia?” curious, I asked. “I do think that our representation in this country is a concern especially with all the stereotypes that people have on Indians.”

“But a way to rise above that than getting proper education. Those who are financially stable are lucky, but what about those who are not? They need to get out of the cycle and see the world.”

To Keith, the inability to see life in a bigger picture will restrict your reality. Which is why if he had to write a letter to his future self he would ask if the older Keith is okay and hope he is not having a stagnant life at that point of his life.

“Hopefully you don’t have a wife and kids too!” he added.

This young musician who would like to visit Japan one day told us that there’s just something about the way Japanese do things that he loves. Contrary to the Western world, Japanese people don’t have problem with routine and he think it’s very interesting how they live life there.

Twitter/Instagram: @keithhateskids

We hope you enjoy this feature as much as we do. We had a really good time working with the personalities and super glad that we get to share their stories with all of you!

Love, Kekabumi.

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