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kannoushousetsu · 22 days

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As much as I want to be understanding of the wacky legalities when it comes to potential harm to children (even if those are pixel dragon children), the hatchling skin moderation update really rubs me the wrong way.

Initially when I read the post the thing that irked me the most was the part about Lolita fashion. I don't care about zombies, and I get why scars might be considered an issue (even if the majority of scars I personally have came from various dumb shit I did as a kid)... but Lolita fashion?

I'm sure there are some people who find it hot, but people find all kind of things hot. Should we ban teacher and nurse themed dragons next out of fear that some people might get off to them?

But either way. The longer I think about it, the more I'm irked by the whole base statement that permababies are literal children. Like, what the fuck is up with that? They literally wrote:

"content that communicates visually or through the title/name that the hatchling is an adult in a child's body, etc."

Staff... By your own site's mechanics they ARE an adult in a child's body. Hatchlings are children for the first 5 days of their life, and even the rarest breeds become consenting adults after 35 days out of the egg.

With the way the system works, you won't be able to put skins on literal babies — only on eternally youthful dragons. And eternally youthful dragons are basically any old dragon + 350 gems.

Decade old dragon + 350 gems = permababy.

A dragon with a laundry list of children + 350 gems = permababy.

If you're uncomfortable about the fact that eternally youthful dragons can be perceived as children — update the writing on the scrolls and affected dragons. Make a post to talk in detail about how those dragons are adults. Do literally anything but come out and say "by our site's standards this dragon of yours that has been bred to hell and back and is a proud great-great-grandma by now is a literal child uwu". Idk about yall, but to me that sounds like a way worse implication than any usermade Lolita skin a moderator might have the misfortune to look at.

#flight rising #fr permababy #fucking yikes #idk that whole post reeks #“we wouldn't want anything bad to happen to our pixel babies uwu”#well too fucking bad staff #congratulations on confirming dragon child brides

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kannoushousetsu · 1 month

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Reading through half of AO3's virginity kink (M/F) selection is pretty much a yearly event for me. Some of those works I know by heart, lol. But while it occurred to me many times before that maybe I should put them on some kinda list (insert obligatory fbi joke somewhere right here), this is the first time I actually went along with the impulse.

It's a simple(ish?) checklist I'm making primarily for my own amusement, so the things I decided to account for are pretty basic:

The pairings — to see which character within a fandom is the, uh, top deflowerer. There is probably a less disgusting way to say this, but also am I wrong?

Additional tags (both specified and just painfully obvious) — to see what kind of content tends to accompany my kind of content most often and also because the unmentioned praise kink is sometimes so thick in the air I can smell it /affectionate/

MC descriptors (or lack thereof) — while lack of any tangible description is most common in the type of media a reader is meant to insert themselves into, there are still things that either slip through or proudly stand out of the ordinary. For example, out of the first 20 fics I went through, only one MC was evidently not white. So there's that.

And then a larger open synopsis space that includes everything else noticeable (to me) within the fanfic:

Who propositions whom. So far the Dragon Age fandom predominantly makes the girl do this kind of work. Who would've thunk.

Descriptions of smells and tastes, if anything of notice is mentioned.

Where the event happens. It is most often someone's bed, sure, but then it's an open balcony? In winter? There's, like, snow laying right there? Do you want a UTI? Because that's how you get a UTI.

How it goes. So far the most common way for things to go is:

Oral ★ > Fingering ★ > Missionary ✿ ★

★ being an orgasm and ✿ being, well, the obvious?

Thus far the arithmetic average is 2,23 orgasms per a loss of virginity (but I probably should add some bonus points to that for three fics I encountered with multiple orgasms)!

And other notable little things (and timeless classics) that I lightheartedly chuckle at.

So far a variation of "Will it even fit?" was mentioned in 38% of works, and a variation of "Are you sure you want it to be me?" in 31%. Average pain scale was "a bit of a pinch", and any amount of blood was mentioned 15% of the time.

As this is a personal fun little project and not a serious publication in Psychology Today or something, it can't possibly be 100% accurate or all-encompassing. There are more works in the Loss of Virginity tags than will be in my selection. That is mostly because I disqualify any works where the male partner is the virgin in question, but on rare occasions it may also happen because I personally really don't vibe with what I'm reading.

For example, so far I skipped two fanfics in the Dragon Age tags that could've otherwise qualified. One of them for being an AU that at that point should've just been their own separate 50SoG, and one that started with descriptions of Zevran's past sexual assault experience and soured my mood too much to continue for the evening.

I will try to include the information on this margin of error (and keep it to a minimum) going forward as well. Bu yeah.

There are also some things that may not become apparent to me until way too late to get a concrete count of them. Like, as awkward as it is to admit, it took me one too many fics to notice that "he's bigger than she expected" is a common pattern even outside of size difference tags. So I'm not accounting for it this time, because I'm not reading all that again to find every instance of it.

But the thing that I'm annoyed at myself the most for being too late to notice it is the pattern of the MC being worried that her inexperience is a turn off.

I was more than 100k words in when it suddenly occurred to me that I keep coming across this same sentiment, rolling my eyes and getting annoyed, but moving along without writing down anything. It felt too late to come back, and frankly I just didn't wanna dwell on it.

(I still ended up dwelling on it, perhaps a tad too much, but writing about things I find annoying on Tumblr isn't the most efficient kind of therapy, so it might take me some time still to gather my thoughts on the matter). But it is apparent that I'm not this particular trope's target audience, so to hell with it anyway.

Welp. I guess that's about it for now. I'm starting this project from Dragon Age (all media types), and will have to see if there's any juice still left of me once I account for everything in the Loss of Virginity tag there to dive into another fandom right after. Hell, I wonder what awaits me in the depths even here! I decided to sort the fics by the amount of kudos, so whatever awaits me in the latter pages might, uh, change this statistic dramatically. Time shall tell?

#ao3 #statistics #virginity kink #freak in the (google) sheets #dragon age

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kannoushousetsu · 1 month

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What chain of events leads to an adult woman spending free time this way?

Well, uh, how should I say that... Childhood trauma?

This is both too vague to serve as a good faith answer and not funny enough of a non-answer; but 3rd post, even on a personal blog, is perhaps a tad too early to delve into detailed descriptions of abuse and csa and what it tends to do to a person.

It is, on the other hand, a good time to notify anyone who might visit this blog that it is in fact my personal blog, and that those are themes that will inevitably be woven into whatever I write going forward.

But hey, at least my life experience has (hopefully) made me moderately funny?

#child abuse #csa #childhood trauma #my mother's side of the family all survives through sheer force of narcissism #but at least none of them (that i know of) are into kids #my priest father on the other hand...#my early life was an extremely eventful kind of mess #and then as soon as i grew up and managed to escape that house A FULL ON FUCKING WAR BROKE OUT IN MY COUNTRY #shit sucks man #but it is what it is #so yeah #my experiences are likely far from universal #and far from a pleasant read #but whatever #therapy is expensive and tumblr dot com is free #so tumblr it is

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