jw-horror-stories

[jw-horror-stories]

PIMO venting here!

i have a story from an assembly i had to go to last summer! i remember i was so disinterested in the whole thing and i was pressured to go even tho i was feeling horrible and i was going thru a major period of gender dysphoria so the idea of wearing a suit was a really disgusting idea to me

i went to use the washroom at one point to freshen up and i saw a man drag his kid into a washroom stall and began giving her “corporal punishment”, even tho the kid was crying and asking him to stop. nobody in the room had the fucking decency to question it, and i hate myself so much for not doing anything even tho i was there and seeing it! i was completely shaken the rest of the day and when i got home i wanted to hurl

later i mentioned this to a jw family member and how i was so disgusted that it was allowed for a child to suffer and that it was ok for her to scream in anguish. the best (or worst) thing about it was he was apologetic for it! he said that it was ok and even permissible! and this was coming from a bethelite and an elder, someone you’d think to be the best of the best.

safe thing to say is that i think in that moment is when i started down on this path to becoming PIMO.

Corporal punishment is seen as more acceptable among previous generations (Boomers, Gen X, even some early Millenials). I'm afraid corporal punishment covers far beyond the confines of Jehovah's Witnesses. Still, if there's one thing I can say about the cult, it's that they're very slow to change or adaptation, so I predict this would continue to be a thing for them.

Hope all goes well with your eventual (if not current) HRT.

-Degurechaff

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission #jehovas witnesses

[jw-horror-stories]

Always remember:

Anyone telling you not to read someone else's post because they're "dangerous" or whatever, especially if they themselves haven't read it, are usually afraid their own worldview is fragile at best.

That in and of itself isn't bad, but if they want you to share the same mindset and they absolutely CANNOT let you see what "the bad guys" have to say, then that's a cult.

I cannot stress this enough because I know now a lot of my followers are already isolated from their own family/circle/etc. And cults of all shapes and sizes love it when a new recruit comes pre-isolated.

-Degurechaff, because cults. Cults never change.

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories

[jw-horror-stories]

Apostasy

does anyone hve any sin recommendations i just fell from the garden of eden five seconds ago

[jw-horror-stories]

hey i’ve been reading your blog over the last few days. i’m living in a jw family that’s seen as like an elite group because they’ve had a part in a lot of major things since it was founded. i’ve been questioning for months now about the faith and as much as i feel valid in my own feelings im now really scared my whole life up until this point has been wasted(17yrs)

to note, i personally identify as non-binary and somewhere between asexual and bi- which is awesome because a lot of jws in my life are transphobic or homophobic and those who might be catching on with me have a tendency to be very passive aggressive

im also autistic- so ive had do deal with my fair share of ableism

also i gotta mention- ever since i learned about evolution in school, i’ve firmly believed the evidence to it. i’ve frequently asked about this topic and others to other jws because there must be a rational explanation for why the belief in creationism etc etc. but ive only ever gotten “because god said so”, “you are denying the word of god! do you still even believe?” and to just pray and meditate (?!) it’s so fucking annoying

(TW FOR ABUSE)

my father used to be verbally and physically abusive to my mom and i. because of the rules they weren’t allowed to leave each other and he fucking traumatized her. apparently my extended family knew of this and did NOTHING because they didn’t want to respect the family arrangement- so they let me just get abused and suffer years worth of mental health issues

———

for the last year or two now i’ve felt like this wasn’t for me, especially because a lot of the rules we have meant i couldn’t get therapy and i couldn’t have friends and i had to stick in a small worldview. but i am so scared of losing the love of my family which i know will happen- my uncle got disfellowshipped and they speak like hes a blot on the family.

there’s a lot more but i’ve been rambling for too long. my only question is what does PIMO/I mean? i see it getting mentioned a lot but i have no clue what it means

thanks again for the blog!

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#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission

[jw-horror-stories]

Went to the memorial today to make my parents happy, hadn’t gone there in, like, four years. Luckily nobody really talked to me and they bought me Wendy’s after 👍 Also there was a baby in the seat in front of us that was screaming the whole time

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#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission

[jw-horror-stories]

you will not be stuck here forever.

they will guilt you and force you to attend every meeting and participate in every activity but one day you will be gone and they won't be able to control you anymore.

one day you will not be forced to find solace in church bathrooms.

[jw-horror-stories]

“lean not on your own understanding” fucked. me. up. yes, i understand the context in which it was written thousands of years ago but i’m not talking about that. i’m talking about how that verse has been weaponized by modern evangelical christianity to abuse and maintain control over people. to smother any critical thinking, resistance, independence, individualism, and more. this post doesn’t have a point. i am just pissed about my religious trauma and all the fighting i had to do just to trust my gut, my instincts, and my own critical thinking. i’m angry about all the years of loving, growing, and discovering myself that i lost to the spiritual abuse from the church.

[jw-horror-stories]

The last ask reminded me of this; this is VERY heavy so feel free not to post.

I have a memory of another brother at the kingdom hall I went to as a child assaulting me in the rows. I was around 5 and wearing a dress. I don't think anyone noticed, and if they did, they didn't do anything to stop it. I brought it up to my sister once, and she told me about how many pedophiles the religion seems to harbor

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#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission

[jw-horror-stories]

not anything super insane but people would constantly hug me and shake my hand without even asking me in the kingdom halls and my mother would get angry at me when i refused to "greet" people and all i can do now is laugh in panic disorder. this plus the fact my mother knew very well random strangers touching me made my body physically repulsed but its okay because we were all technically family right with the whole brother and sister thing and she always tried to spin it that way no matter what when its like. no? i don't know these people? don't touch me actually??? very tiring in all i have more stories but had to go with something more tame to just share something thats at least mildly insane. at least to me.

Gotta keep up the act, they say. Doesn't matter how uncomfortable it is. At least in retail you get paid, and (usually) they don't condone random acts of touchy-feely.

-Degurechaff, was at one point randomly massaged by an Elder once.

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission

[jw-horror-stories]

I don't know in other parts of the world, but here in Canada we have a thing called Family Day which is often on the 3rd Monday of February.

Knowing how many people following me are at least on thin ice with family, I would like to say...

...can I be the weird uncle that the adults think is insane but the kids seem to like spending time with?

I've no desire to be the team dad or anything, too much responsibility for me. But I certainly wouldn't mind going go-karting or whatevs.

-Degurechaff, please?

#mod degurechaff #jwhs #jehovah's witness horror stories #not jehovah's witnesses

[jw-horror-stories]

pimo kid whos avoiding baptism with an inch of my life here. one kinda vent and one funny story

i was at a public talk yesterday about babylon the great and there was so many statements that contridiected the bible and real world history to the point i was making faces visibly. mom asked if i was okay, and i made the rookie mistake of being honest about my religious beliefs in the moment. now she wants to see the results on further research..and man i DO not want to face my parents head on again. i get scared ill lose their love every time even though they say it isnt true. i feel trapped

i was having a anxiety attack at mid-week meeting and mom told me to go pray in the bathroom. so i technically did. but it was mainly just me saying to Jehovah he sounds like a load of hypocrisy and i want proof that what the bible says. next day, got an awesome character in a game, who is also a lesbian and trans. had a great day doing a lot of sinful stuff aka just being myself and never felt better. then the next meeting was the post above. i think this a sign. maybe. i dunno im deist

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#jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission

[jw-horror-stories]

HI I was in this askbox before, but I RECENTLY learned something new!

My grandfather is an ✨apostate✨who actually spoke out about the JWs several times!

He did speeches and stuff, apparently, a couple of open letters.

I'm so so shocked at learning this because we still go over to their house? My mother talks to him? My father isn't a JW anymore but he still talks to him.

This explains a lot of stories I've been told- My mom was sent away for nine months after *holding my father's hand*, and that was it, but now I think it might be that she was sent away for *holding an apostate's son's hand*.

My grandfather was very open with his story when he wrote letters, so I won't restate any of here because I don't want to doxx myself- but yeah!

Wild!

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#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories #submission

[jw-horror-stories]

Ooh, I love telling my JW stories!!

1. (tw familial abuse) First off, I was lucky enough to not have had other kids my age in our congregation, so I wasn't really pressured into baptism. I got out when I was 16,it was a bit messy but no comparison to how it would have gone had I been baptised.

2. My mom was actually allowed to get a divorce! But only after she wrote to Bethel. My father was abusive to everyone in our family (my mother as well, but not quite as bad as him). She asked the elders in oir congregation to be allowed to get a divorce, but they didn't allow it. My older sister just turned 18 (I was a toddler, my younger brother a baby) and threatened my mom to go to CPS and try and get custudy for me and my siblings. So my mother wrote to Bethel, told them about everything and they allowed he to get a divorce. It was really messy and we had to go to a different congregation.

3. Said sister was disfellowshipped when I was 4 for having a boyfriend. Until then I had spent almost every day and night either with her or my other sister. From one day to the next I wasn't allowed to see her anymore and basically only then started living with my mom and my brother.

4. My elementary school teacher bullied me for being JW and poor. That's not JW fault (she also did this to the only muslim kid in my class and another poor kid) but it still sucks.

5. When I was 12 two elder (both over 50) talked to me about my nail polish. They said that it was really disrespectful to tempt men like that and asked if I wanted to be a stumbling block or viewed as a whore.

6. I actually don't have much to tell about evolution, because it was only briefly mentioned in my science lessons. The teachers knew about our religion, so I wrote one sentence at the end of the test (something like "scientists believe..., but I believe the bible") and that was done.

6. I do however remember how I debated pro life in politics class. Like the good jw I was I usually didn't really participate in our politics lessons, only enough to get an ok grade. But I cann still feel how my heart was beating because I was so horrified that my classmates were okay with "killing babies" (while praying for God to kill everyone who isn't jw).

7. I also remember when I was 11 (?) and I finally found two friends in school (who I was only allowed to see in school and for schoolwork) that I thought how nice it would be if someone killed them, because then they would be resurrected (also thought that the kindest thing to do would be if one person decided to kill as many people as possible, because they themselves would not get into paradise, but they would help others, because if you have already been resurrected it would be easier to decide FOR the truth). You know, normal kids thoughts...

8. I was constantly terrified that I would have unforgivable thoughts. I always had a "what if..?"-mind, so as a very young child I thought about "what if this is the dream and our dreams are the real world?" "How do we know what's real?" and stuff like that and I always had doubts in my mind (although of course I did everything to suppress them). When I learned that blasphemy was unforgivable and that a lot of stuff is considered blasphemy in jw circles I was even more afraid of my own mind.

9. One time my mom found my brother's Yu-Gi-Oh cards and freaked out because ot would certainly invite demons into our home. (I was slightly better at hiding my stuff)

10. Also, my family is convinced that my father invited demons into our home because he read Stephen King.

11. When I went to 7th grade I had to choose between learning French or Latin. I always wanted to learn Latin because I always had athing for ancient languages and "useless" knowledge. But my mom said that I would only need Latin if I wanted to go to college so I had to choose French. I had 5 years of French, hated every second of it and now that I could actually use it, I have to relearn everything because I forgot everything. Now I really like it btw, but now its purpose is;vt to keep me from acquiring "the wisdom of men".

You're among the more fortunate. This is good.

I'm actually quite surprised they Guv'Body actually relented.

Separating families. Classic Guv'Body technique.

That's messed up. Though sadly I don't have any words of advice regarding teachers abusing students (I'm here for Jehovah's Witness Horror Stories, not School Horror Stories).

Honestly by this point the Elders are most likely projecting their own sexual desires. In layman's terms I think they may be pedophiles themselves.

(You put 6 twice so I'll just merge the two). It's amazing how one's cult programming can bleed into everyday life. I like to think that it's this very same bleeding that caused me to start asking questions.

That's the very same hypothetical I've brought up on at least one occasion regarding logical extremes. Believing that the dead will simply await judgement after Armageddon, etc etc. A horrific proposition, if you ask me.

It's stuff like this that makes it easy to scare people into submission. Make someone unable to trust their own instincts, and they'll cling to anything and anyone who acts as their "leader". A dictator's favourite pasttime.

I've basically just learned never to share my interests beyond the barest of descriptions because of this.

I've heard of several regimes that would try to snuff out literature. They rhyme with "Mittler", "Chtalin", and "Meow".

Reading Latin would've helped you read some of the older Bible literature, and therefore poke holes into JW theology. I FEEL LIKE I SEEN THIS SOMEWHERE.

-Degurechaff, dropping the "Mod" prefix.

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories

[jw-horror-stories]

Also thank you for running this blog!! Even after all these years that I'm out, it still helps to see that there are people who understand <3

Happy to help!

-Degurechaff

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories

[jw-horror-stories]

if I could ask God anything and get the real, genuine answer, I'd ask him why He commanded Abraham to sacrifice Isaac. He knew He was going to stop him. He knew that He'd never truly ask him to do it. He knew that if he went through with it then His promise would be frustrated.

The thing is... the story has led parents to think it's okay to sacrifice their children, metaphorically and sometimes literally, for a false sense of moral superiority. How many LGBT+ children have been sacrificed in the supposed name of Christianity? How many autistic children? How many orphaned children? How many abused children?

Maybe it was the right lesson for Abraham, especially about how it paralleled Christ's atonement. But it's not a story that has translated well into modern times.

[jw-horror-stories]

On an unrelated note, I've been finding myself saying "Gods" instead of "God" where otherwise commonly used.

"Oh my gods" "What in the gods-damned?" "gods-dammit" etc.

Just thought it'd be funny.

-Mod Degurechaff, ring-a-ding-ding

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories

[jw-horror-stories]

Not enough people understand the importance of the phrase "I don't know the answer, but that ain't it chief."

"If not God, how did Life?"

I don't know the answer, but God ain't it chief.

-Mod Degurechaff, still isn't it chief.

#mod degurechaff #jehovah's witnesses #jwhs #jehovah's witness #jehovah's witness horror stories