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snowy new york
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What's wrong?
everything bitch don’t act stupid
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brain: here's a good memory with someone who ended up really hurting you
me: why did you bring me this
brain: just because
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i think the hardest part of losing someone, isn’t having to say goodbye, but rather learning to live without them.
- Day 69
(via chocolate-pumkin)
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depression is being lonely in a room full of people
depression is being constantly tired but never able to sleep
depression is smiling to hide the pain inside
depression is when the soul dies but the body keeps on going
depression is forgetting who you used to be
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Me: I should focus more on my mental health!
Me to Me: ...How about you don't eat for three days and ignore all of your friends?
Me: ...
Me: ...
Me: Sounds good!
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And just when you thought you were better, you’re not. You’ve ended up in the bed asking yourself, “How did I get to this place in my life?” When, really, no one, not even yourself, can answer that question. Because you don’t know where it went wrong, but it did. Maybe it was sleeping with the guy who is now your boyfriend, but he wasn’t when you fucked him. Maybe it’s taking a job you knew would last long enough. Maybe it was listening when someone said they’d never hurt you again. Maybe it was keeping your mouth shut when you needed to speak up the most. Maybe it was bottling everything up until you finally explode, and the one person you love starts to realize how deliusional you really are. Maybe it all went wrong from the beginning. Maybe your very existence is what is wrong. And maybe if I want here, it would be better for everyone. It’s already as if I’m not here. My voice and opinions aren’t heard. My actions could be gone without. My name will have been said a million times as people cry and say how much they loved me, but it’s not true. No one ever cared enough to really ask me how I was. So, maybe... Just maybe... We could end this. Right here, right now. And it would be better for everyone.
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Not fruit. Not salad. But it IS a bowl of Gushers.
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i just want to matter to someone
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Tired of feeling alone even when you’re right beside me
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