just-a-man-in-a-can

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Okay, you need to make sure you play this game at some point. Maybe not today or anything, because you’ll need about thirty minutes and a serious willingness to understand how it works, but - it’s so worth it. It’s basically an answer to our occasional frustration - why do assholes always come out on top? - and the beautiful thing about it is that not only does it explain how that happens, but also how we can change it.

“In the short run, the game defines the players. But in the long run, it’s us players who define the game.”

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🧍‍♂️➡️🥫

write your url by only using emojis

🍅✨✨

#fun

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If you know you know.

... Extrapolating from incomplete data be like...

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Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

#tumblr stories

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tumblr i am once again asking to reblog ads bc what the fuck

#level up by beeping AND booping

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Pass it on 💛

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Happy Ides of March

#ides

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caesars assassination but with empty cardboard tubes

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“The average person thinks about the Roman Empire every day” factoid is a statistical error. Tumblr users in March -

#IDES

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Having a vagina honestly sucks bc it's like you have to do fucking alchemy just to prevent yourself from getting sick. You've got an intricate ecosystem of microorganisms down there that you're dependent on for your own well-being and they can be set off by the tiniest fucking thing

Keeping your pubes too short can cause yeast infections, but letting them get too long can also cause yeast infections. Washing the area with specialized soap can help prevent yeast infections, but it can also cause them. Your periods can cause yeast infections, and so can the medicine you take to stop your periods. Having sex can cause yeast infections, especially if the person you're having sex with is diabetic (???). Being diabetic can cause yeast infections. Wearing the wrong clothes or eating the wrong things can cause yeast infections. Not getting enough fucking sleep can cause yeast infections. The list is neverending

Luckily, yeast infections are fairly easy to treat with OTC medicine that you can find at any Walmart. BUT! Even if all of your symptoms indicate that you have a yeast infection, you have to take a test first to confirm that it's a yeast infection (they do not sell the tests at Walmart) bc you might actually have the opposite of a yeast infection (bacterial vaginosis) which has the exact same symptoms as a yeast infection but is caused by an imbalance of different microorganisms. And if you use yeast infection medicine to treat a bacterial infection it will light your pussy on fire. So if you have a bacterial infection, you must instead visit your local witch doctor (gynecologist) and get prescribed special potions (antibiotics) to treat it

Antibiotics can also cause yeast infections

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Got offered a job that looked better than my current one. They requested an example article from me. I worked really, really, really fucking hard to find something which would do numbers for them.

They accessed my application and looked at the sample article on March 3rd.

On March 3rd their website ran my article under a different writer's name, practically verbatim.

On March 4th they told me "after careful consideration we've decided not to proceed with your candidature."

You mean after you stole my fucking example article you fucking cunts.

I can't even begin to convey how mad and upset I am tbh.

Anyway, I usually don't name and shame, but this site was GameRant if anyone cares, and doesn't want to read articles which are legitimately written by people who they offer employment opportunities to and then steal from to churn out under a fake profile.

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Julius Caesar memes are fun and all, but make sure you don’t forget the true meaning of the holiday: Stabbing the fuck out of politicians for their flagrant, self-serving abuse of power.

#ides of march

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🇵🇸 From BDS:

More than 300 Palestinian sports teams are calling to ban Israel from the Olympics over its genocide against Palestinians in Gaza. [...] In Gaza, Israel has killed Palestinian Olympic Football coach Hani Al Masdar, destroyed the Palestinian Olympic Committee offices, and turned sports facilities into shameful mass detention and torture centers. We can’t sit back as the IOC allows Israel to use the Olympics to sportswash its genocide in Gaza and its apartheid regime against Palestinians everywhere. Support the call from Palestinian teams. Join the campaign to #BanIsrael from the Olympics and peacefully disrupt the road to the Paris 2024 games. 

Global days of action planned for March 15-17:

Ahead of the IOC executive board meeting in Lausanne Switzerland (March 19-21), take the call from Palestinian teams to your National Olympic Committee, International Sports Federations and Recognized Sports Federations. Organize protests, sit-ins, peaceful disruptions, or awareness raising events on Israeli attacks on Palestinian sports.

For more concrete information on how you can participate in the campaign, see the link above. You should also check in with your local BDS-affiliated organization(s) to see if they have anything planned for these dates (if they don't, consider bringing it up to them)

If you're not familiar with any BDS-affiliated organizations in your country (or state/city), then take a look at BDS's "Join a Campaign'"page.

There's also a petition you can sign.

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y'all, it is March 1st...

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A lot of adulthood is shouting “AUGH MY LAUNDRY” hours after you put it in the washer/dryer and running to go fetch it

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My brother refuses to get Tumblr, which is a tragedy because this is the complete fucking nonsense they have sent me today alone, and I think Tumblr would appreciate them more than I do.

Edit to add poll.

#posts with 10k notes to me #this is hilarious