itsteenagewastelandus

[itsteenagewastelandus]

opposite sides

You get to be loved, understood, have someone be on your side. I have conditions to be loved, a commitment to being misunderstood, and a battle only I’m fighting. How can you do this to me. How can you put conditions on love you promised was borderless. I can’t keep crying, I can’t keep begging god to make you love me more. I can’t keep being the only person to hold myself at night. I hope in another universe, you love me more, and I’m more gentle than you.I hope you never feel the pain I do, im sure it would kill you. I hope you always have someone, and you never feel as lonely and broken as I do

[itsteenagewastelandus]

17

The feeling of 17 lingers all over me. I’m no longer a child but scoff at being called an adult. I seem to live in a constant déjà vu of 17. I’m still pleading with the same boy to choose me, still wondering if things get better with us. They don’t. We’re still two mean teenagers stuck in adults body’s. Hurting the other, declaring themselves the victor. Coming back together because no one else will detangle our bitterness. Mean, angry, spiteful, the characteristics that define both of us. With wind, sun and water doing the best to soften us, but we both stay hard and callusesd. Two kids, who never shown the true meaning of love, throwing the word around. I want to mature, I want to not repeat, but he knows my scars, he knows where I bleed. The places in my skull, I don’t want to show anyone else, he knows they exist. It feels like 17, except this time I know better, but I’ve miss the feeling of your blade. Everyone else’s has been too dull to puncture the skin, but yours goes right through the bone, straight to the heart. I hate to bleed, and cry so hard I feel like I’m drowning, but happiness feels like a unfit glove. It keeps on slipping and just doesn’t fit right. I sit in paradise, feeling like a child who’s dad won’t stop drinking, mom won’t stop yelling, and a boy who will never really love her. It’s time to grown up, but I’m leaving claw marks on my past, as the future pulls me forward.

[itsteenagewastelandus]

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[itsteenagewastelandus]

Deja-vu

Feeling 17 at 23, stuck in the same spot of knowing how it ends. Playing a game, where the only winning is not playing. Loving someone, who will never love you the same. Second place, to everyone and everything. Put myself together, and now I’ve handed you the hammer, asking you to do it again.

[itsteenagewastelandus]

No ying, no yang

As much as I love happiness, I seem to be comfortable in misery

[itsteenagewastelandus]

The only exception

The rules that apply to them, never applied to you. Neve loved any one else. Never wanted the white picket life with any one else. Never wanted things to be different more.

[itsteenagewastelandus]

You get to be loved and I get to be used.

[itsteenagewastelandus]

sinking.

It’s a feeling I use to call home. One that has taken up almost all the space of my teenage brain. My heart feels tight and tears soak my face and hands. I’m a little girl again, wondering what I’ve done wrong. I’m 18, begging someone not to leave me alone. I’m 21, asking what I could have done, to be loved for one more day. I’m 22 saying good by to my best friend, who never got my best self. I’m 23, wondering when the emptiness will leave me to go be someone else’s hole. The words are never beautiful, just painful. I’m here, sinking in.

[itsteenagewastelandus]

Do i love him or did my ex screw up any type of feeling i have ?

[itsteenagewastelandus]

My ex: call me anytime You need me:

me when I miss him on his voicemail: baby answer I love you

[itsteenagewastelandus]

I miss my ex and call him 39 times it’s called

self care alright X)

[itsteenagewastelandus]

You ever poop and it scratches the part of your butthole you just couldn’t get to?

[itsteenagewastelandus]

People just aren’t ready for you. The Iron Giant (1999) Directed by Brad Bird

[itsteenagewastelandus]

Just had a sneaky link for cuddling, we‘re in deep boys

[itsteenagewastelandus]

Andrew Garfield the most fuckable spider man frfr

[itsteenagewastelandus]

Had a great day. Saw family. Laughed myself sore. And I still don’t want to be here. what’s wrong with me

[itsteenagewastelandus]

Capitalism has gaslighted me into believing pooping at work is wrong and IM SICK OF IT