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Crowley: Are you okay?? Why are you crying?!

Aziraphale: Yeah *sniffles* it’s just this onion

Crowley: *furiously grabs onion* what the FUCK did you do to my angel?!

#ineffable dumbasses #ineffable idiots

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I am once again thinking about digging holes

It's so fucked up that digging a bunch of holes works so well at reversing desertification

I hate that so much discourse into fighting climate change is talking about bioenginerring a special kind of seaweed that removes microplastics or whatever other venture-capital-viable startup idea when we have known for forever about shit like digging crescent shaped holes to catch rainwater and turning barren land hospitable

#save the world dig a hole

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Highlights from the conference room where they nominated contenders for Word of the Year 2023:

• They put Skibidi Toilet on the projector to explain what “skibidi” means.

• Baby Gronk was mentioned.

• We discussed the Rizzler.

• “Cunty” was nominated.

• “Enshittification” was suggested for EVERY category.

• “Blue Check” (like from Twitter) was briefly defined as “Someone who will not Shut The Fuck Up”

• The person writing notes briefly defined babygirl as “referencing [The Speaker]”. He is now being called babygirl in the linguist groupchats.

• MULTIPLE people raised their hand to say “I cannot stress this enough: ‘Babygirl’ refers to a GROWN MAN”

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Reblog if you would buy this poster (this honestly gives dorm RA vibes too)

I need one of these posters for my kids tbh

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens swag

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My internal monologue, at any given time

#and the one that stood out to me was Mr. Brown

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Aziraphale: Crowley, do you remember when we ran into one another in Rome?

Crowley: Yeah, I remember that.

Aziraphale: *blushes* remember when my entire forearm was on display?

Crowley: *gasps softly* yes I do…

#legitimately how has no one claimed the Michael_Sheens_Forearm handle #who has the audacity #we need you like Gotham needs Batman

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Ou fuck, I finally started How Do We Turn On The Light.

There goes my weekend.

Chapter 3 hurts me more than the final 15 does and I swear if one of you lil shits come in here and tell me it gets even more painful *shakes fist*

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everyone and their mother should read this good omens fic https://archiveofourown.org/works/55369603 its actually the most insane incredible fic ive read in months and i NEED more people to see it

CLICKABLE LINK! Thank you i always love a rec

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mlm/wlw solidarity hostility

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I just know Aziraphale and Crowley will end up retired the way Pestilence is retired. Going on and on about how relaxed they are and how happy they are not to be working, meanwhile you glance at their calendar out of the corner of your eye and take immediate psychic damage.

(every retiree I’ve ever met is like this)

#good omens ficlet #ineffable husbands #south downs cottage #good omens #good omens 2

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Hi Neil,

I write to you because I find myself without answers, and who better to turn to than you, the person who has arguably raised the most questions in my life due to your lovely stories.

I currently live with my dad and step mother, his two sons (my brothers) and her two children. There are a lot of us in one space right now and it’s safe to say we don’t get along very well.

Getting to the point, I want to live on my own. I have the means to do so (hypothetically). I have a job and a car and savings put back, but up until recently it hadn’t occurred to me that leaving was an option. I always thought it wasn’t allowed for some reason. That there would be consequences for revoking my presence from them like I’m their favorite toy instead of a person.

The fear, I suppose, is that they won’t forgive me for leaving. That I’ll leave and fail somehow. That I won’t be able to come back from the hubris that is thinking I could do things on my own. Truly though, the real danger is that I’ll never be in a place where I can be myself without some all consuming guilt gnawing at my stomach.

The question is whether or not to deal with the current circumstances or risk losing everything for the chance at success.

Can you get the things you want and keep the things you have?

Sincerely, a huge fan wishing they had a beloved Bentley to live in and offering condolences for the rant.

As a parent, you are doing your job when your children leave the nest and become independent. It means you did something right.

As a child, it's always scary to leave. But it's necessary. You aren't punishing the people you are leaving. You are beginning your journey to independence.

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Crowley cosplay at ComoFun

My boyfriend in Crowley cosplay at Como Fun, Italy 😍♥️

I'm a very lucky girl 🥰

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since the cowboy and the samurai were both dying out in the 1800s i want an action adventure historically wildly inaccurate comic about the last cowboy and the last samurai teaming up BUT one of them is gay and the other doesn’t understand what being gay is and there are multiple comedic mishaps resulting from this

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there's a very thin line between bodyguard boyfriend and trophy wife and Crowley is balancing on it like a goddamn funambulist

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The idiots