indagonightmare

[indagonightmare]

AGHGHGHGHGHGHHH

WHOEVER DECIDED TO GWT RID OF HEADPHONE JACKS AND ACTUAL REAL PHYSICAL BUTTONS ON PHONES I AM GOING TO KILL YOU

#had to get a new phone today #I am NOT happy about it #I hate new phones #I hate capitalism #Next time I'm getting a damn landline

[indagonightmare]

I’m in Poland and they keep showing this pizza advert and it’s amazing.

It starts off with rival pizza makers who argue over who has the best pizza and are driving the customers away

Then there’s this crazy old lady who yells at them from a window to quit it (because where else do you yell business advice from?)

So they work together and do some obvious flirting via pizza montage

And the old lady is all like “just kiss already”

Then they create a pizza together, combine restaurants and live happily ever after with the crazy window lady

[indagonightmare]

Tomska going hard on Twitter again.

[indagonightmare]

I am losing it at this image on Wikipedia for static electricity

look at that Expression Of Resignation To Fate

[indagonightmare]

do you ever hear people talking about something and you’re like. fuck. let me be real for a second. i’m too much of a commie to have this conversation

[indagonightmare]

no i don’t have plans later. i will, however, be taking extensive poison damage periodically for the foreseeable future. but beyond that my schedule is totally open

[indagonightmare]

honestly like i get the poly(nesian) vs poly(amorous) thing, and n(on)b(lack) vs n(on)b(inary), and i’ll change to polyam or ply or enby if asked to avoid confusion, but i also need yall to know that like…its okay for one abbreviation to have multiple meanings. theres only 26 letters and we can reuse some of them, no one is “stealing” anything.

Animal Crossing did not attack Air Conditioners.

[indagonightmare]

this entry in a ‘what would happen if the internet went down tomorrow’ contest has been making me laugh since 2009

[indagonightmare]

I’ll never understand why anthropomorphic animal cartoons like Robin Hood and Zootopia will go to the trouble of creating character designs that are meant to be understood as “attractive” or even “sexy” to the human audience but explicitly avoid showing interspecies romances between anthropomorphic animals. Why is THAT weird but, like, trying to make rabbits recognizably sexy-coded to humans isn’t?

[indagonightmare]

[indagonightmare]

somehow the poor cops who we were told are simply too understaffed and underpaid because of Woke to deal with 'rampant rising crime' have found the strength to beat the shit out of college students across the whole country for peacefully saying "divest from the country killing innocent palestinians in the tens of thousands"

[indagonightmare]

[indagonightmare]

omg so yesterday i put a salt line on the pathway to our front door because i was fucking around and my brother was pretending to be a demon

and today we ordered pizza and the salt line was still there

and my brother went outside to sign for the pizza

and the pizzaman refused to step over the salt line, like he almost did and then he backed up and handed my bro the pizza and left; which is pretty ridiculous because it’s far from our door

so a heads up to everyone i’m pretty sure domino’s is actually run by demons??? kind of like how in men in black the post office is run by aliens

[indagonightmare]

i think it's fucked up that there are plants that decided they wanted to eat meat

[indagonightmare]

*smoke emiting from clenched fist*

woman: OOOOoOOH NoO!!!! It’s meelltIINNGG!!

*ring melts off woman’s hand*

woman: MY PRECIOUS POWERRrRR RING! GONE FOORRVVERrrr..

woman: *screams like a pterodactyl* 

[indagonightmare]

[indagonightmare]

I want to get into an argument and call whoever a peon.