hlfmoonshine

[hlfmoonshine]

coen watched as the blue curtain was pulled across metal, a sharp scrape to signify that they might be a little more alone than they had been a moment before. not truly, a sheet of cotton wasn't going to dampen where this conversation was going. as soon as sofia retorted, he could read her anger. frustration and confusion mixed together to paint the situation in the most devastating colours. he leaned back in his seat, his arms crossing over his chest. not in defense, but rather as a barrier of protection. there was no way he got out of this conversation without some serious wounds.

"i quit, sof." coen sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "i quit fighting, when you left me. you were the greatest loss i'd ever had, and it wasn't worth it anymore. i moved in with josie and ellie, started going to councelling." he felt like a piece of trash at that admission. he wasn't able to fix himself, or at least get on the right path to fixing himself when he was with her. what did that say about him? what did that say about her?

coen wanted to get up and walk out. he wanted to pull her in and kiss her. he wanted to do anything that would stop him from truly hearing her words. he was having a baby. some little thing was brewing in sofia, a blend of their genetics, a promise of his mannerisms and her brains potential in another being. he couldn't help but think of booker, of the father who hated how much his son looked like him. the pathetic creature left behind with three kids and no idea what he was doing. "i'm going to be a dad?" he asked finally, looking up at her through watery lashes.

she could see the look in his eyes as he tried to process what she was telling him, the change in his expression when he realised that this was his baby. of course it was a shock, maybe she should had tried harder to find him. but life took over, she was so stressed out, she had sent texts, send so many messages that she thought he must have seen them. maybe he changed his number, she didn't know. but he was here now, and the pain he was feeling was obvious.

she sighed and pulled back the curtain so they could talk, though no doubt everyone was going to be listening in but at least this gave them some privacy. "you think i would mess with you about something like this?" she asked and tried to keep her voice calm, she didn't have any right to be angry right now. did she? "i'm not playing game. you should know i don't play games, i don't mess around, i don't play with people's feelings. i tried to find you, i sent you hundreds of texts. am i supposed to be a detective now as well?" she questioned and took a deep breath to calm down. "i'm sorry this isn't -- none of this is what i pictured. i love you, i never stopped loving you and i'm having your baby and it's killing me not being with you." she confessed as she started to feel the tears falling down her face. "but you didn't -- you loved the fighting and the lifestyle more. im having our baby and i don't want to push you away, i want you to be involved. but i can't worry about you all the time any more, there's a tiny person to worry about instead."

#c. eden #coen & sofia #scinglives

[hlfmoonshine]

the open starter department : an anthology

this post tracks all my open starters posted per muse up to 2024/05/27 this post ft. ≈ forty muses, ranging from one to four starters, depending on the muse. * = supernatural origin Φ = criminal origins ° = nepo/fame origins

aberdeen carano (one)* angel silva (one)*Φ angelina george (one)° ash dayna (one)(two) asmodeus moll (one)*Φ bo linklater (one)Φ boone leigh (one)Φ claire leigh (one) cobie conford (one)(two)(three) darius landon (one)(two)Φ dima federov (one)Φ elena toro (one)° este galin (one) fleetwood gagnon (one)(two)(three)° francis landon (one)Φ gillian owens (one)(two)* icarus conford (one)° ingrid wilson (one)Φ ivy reyes (one)° josie eden (one)(two) laramie hannigan (one)(two) lena antonova (one)* lita price (one) lydia reid (one) lori gallagher (one) millie woods (one)° nash clement (one)° nellie dawson (one)Φ otto james (one)° patrick visser (one)* pennyshore robertson (one) perry hart (one) rosemary clement (one)° royal woods (one)° sanem togan (one)(two) seraphina poriosolo (one)(two)(three)* suvi nygard (one)(two)(three)(four) thaddeus james (one)° veronica wright (one)° willa hancock (one)Φ yasha clement (one)°

#📝— the open starter department #✍🏽— open starters #open starter #indie rp

[hlfmoonshine]

going to update this tag today.

#📝— the open starter department

[hlfmoonshine]

everything slowed down, like the whole er had been flooded, wading through water with muffled noise blurring out everything around him. sofia was pregnant. she'd found someone, she'd fallen in love, and suddenly all the things she couldn't have with him were coming true for her. he couldn't even be upset over how quickly she'd moved on, he didn't have a right. just as quickly as he was being drowns, he was ripped from the water with her next admission. the baby was his.

he was able to reach out and grasp at a few of her words. she couldn't find him, that made sense since he'd spent those first three months with his sister and his niece. she'd looked for him. the internet was a thing. he had never been on the internet much. the kid was his. the life growing inside her was a child of his, of hers, the last remaining proof that the two had loved each other before.

"sofia, you— i can't play games. i know i deserve it, but you have to tell me if you are being serious right now." he wanted to be furious and tell her that she hadn't tried hard enough. he wanted to fly off the handle over the fact that she didn't tell him the moment she saw him across the er. "sofia, please don't mess with me. i can't—i don't think i can handle it."

sofia knew she had been the one to end things between them but that didn't mean any of it was easy. when she found out she was pregnant she had tried to reach out to hi, but she didn't know where he had gone. she had lost hope of seeing again, wondering if he had left town to avoid her, to have a new start.

she opened her mouth to say something else, to say that she still loved him. and then he saw his eyes look down, and then she knew it was over. the pretending, that she was seriously going to have to have this conversation with him in the middle of the er. she tried to say something but nothing came out, nodding her head slightly because she didn't trust her voice. after a few moments she cleared her throat. "i -- yeah i am." she confessed quietly. god this was breaking her heart. "i am, and it's -- it's our baby. i tried to call you, i tried to find where you were but i had no idea and then -- well i gave up hope that i'd see you again to be honest and now here you are and i'm -- well i don't know what to say. this isn't how i pictured any of this...." she confessed, she knew he could work out how hard along she was, it had almost been six months since they broke up.

#c. eden #coen & sofia #scinglives

[hlfmoonshine]

open for @ofbookshelves

"you're too pretty, come on, don't get shy on me." fleetwood grinned, keeping his balance on the fence as he held the lens to his eye. "you said you'd help me get pictures for the album, you said you'd be my model, remember?" they were supposed to be getting pictures of him, but the musician couldn't help himself.

#f. gagnon #fleetwood & red #ofbookshelves

[hlfmoonshine]

coe chanced a glance up from her hands, to her face, those eyes he could get lost in, would die happily to see shine brightly. they shimmered, but not in the way he wanted, she looked like she might cry. coen bit back his bitterness, frustrated that he never seemed to bring her any kind of peace. he'd always been the worst thing for her, the clouds in her sunshine days. "you—sof—" what was he supposed to say to that? that his heart still burned for her? that she haunted all his dreams. that she was the best and worst thing he'd ever had, and that if he had to pick between reliving those few months they were together on repeat and building a happy life for himself, he'd never let her go?

"you can tell me anything, sofia. we don't have to do some thing so you can." she was in a relationship again. coen had left town when she left him, gone to stay with josie and eleanor, disappeared to fix himself, he shouldn't be shocked that she was moving on already. "you don't owe me anything, but you also don't have to see me more than now. i know you didn't plan this. i know i've been gone, i just wanted to keep out of your hair, give you space to get away from me." he gave a soft shrug of his shoulders, eyes falling to the ground before him. in that moment, he clocked her stomach, carefully hidden by her coat, but unmistakable now that he'd clocked it. sofia was pregnant. "sof—wait, sofia, are you pregnant?" his voice low and shaky.

sofia missed coen every day, more than she wanted to admit. walking away from him was the hardest thing she had ever had to do. she couldn't take it any more, seeing him hurt, seeing him in pain. having to stitch him up all the time, there was only so many times she could do it. always worrying about him, always panicking that one day it would be one fatal blow. that it would be something she couldn't stop or fix.

she didn't know what to say when coen said that he only wanted the best for her, feeling her eyes watering again because she hated this. hated that they weren't together, hated that she had kept this pregnancy from him. but how would he take it? how could he be a father when he was out fighting all the time? he couldn't quit for her, and she didn't know if he could quit for a child either. "yeah well i still --" she paused, shaking her head because what could she say? "well i still have feelings for you, that didn't go away. so no it's not -- it's not easy you being here. but i need to -- i've been meaning to -- to talk to you -- we should talk. not now but -- soon."

#c. eden #coen & sofia #scinglives

[hlfmoonshine]

open for @saturnblooms

"hayır, anne gitmem lazım!" sanem tried her best to hide her whiny tone. "i have to go, mama." she nodded once, twice and finally hung up the phone, shoving it into her pocket. "i'm in the kitchen, sorry the place is a mess." she called out, grabbing the massive salad bowl she'd been using and bringing it to the sink.

#s. togan #📘— closed starters #saturnblooms

[hlfmoonshine]

open to @dozenrozez

"oh come on, what's life without a little adventure, huh?" syd grinned, rocking against the back of the couch as she looked the other over. "we get up to some mischief, grab something to drink on the way—i hear they dropped a new blood orange flavor of slushie—and then we do something stupid to tie off the night."

#s. allen #📘— closed starters #dozenrozez

[hlfmoonshine]

hi! like this post for a little starter from me! reply to this post for a specific muse!

[hlfmoonshine]

suvi's lip caught between her teeth, concern crossed her brow as she tried to figure out what venus was aiming for. "having fun isn't enough if i'm lost the whole time, vee." suvi gave a clipped sigh and looked the woman over. "what does that even look like? starting over."

"i wasn't trying to push you away. i'm just... really, really good at it." venus always lived for the dramatics, so naturally, she had trouble accepting fault for her actions. "i am interested in you. we had a lot of fun together, didn't we? can't we just start over?"

#s. nygard #suvi & venus #bittcrsuite

[hlfmoonshine]

"they are only that good because of you, ben. don't brush that away. you deserve all the credit your given, even if you don't want to believe it." yasha said with a shake of her head. he'd never saw himself as worthy, no matter what she said. there was a natural urge to hold himself back, lower himself and clip anything that could be seen as good in his personality, in his behavior. they'd broken up, she never understood why or what he'd been thinking, but she always suspected it came from how lowly he seemed to see himself. there was no one better, more loving and kind, more protective and honorable in her eyes.

lucky, privileged, blessed, she'd heard it all before but she never know what to do with it. "you're too kind to me, ben." she said, brushing her blond hair back over her shoulder. she was the angel, and he was the devil, that was how he seemed to view them. she didn't agree, but yasha wasn't the type to argue with people. there was an expectation that as the baby of her family, she would be the spoiled brat, and yet that title belonged to cy and cy alone. yasha was the doormat, the one who never wanted to sway someone, the one who cheered from the sidelines and tried to live a peaceful and easy existence. perhaps that was what tied into ben's opinion of her. helpful but never driven.

ben just nodded when she said that his mom would be proud of them all. that was something he liked about yasha, that she did allow him to let his emotions out. but it was still something he was terrible at, especially when it came to his mom. he don't think he ever truly grieved for her, he had been thrown in to taking care of the girls, there had been no time for him to focus on himself. "i don't know about that, they're a lot better people than i am." ben murmured, he wondered if yasha's whole idea of him would change if she found out what he did for extra cash. that she would ask him why he had never just asked her for money rather than getting involved in gangs.

"bored?" he asked with a raised eyebrow, a small smile tugging on his lips. he knew she was trying to find what she wanted to do, and it was hard. he just kind of went into his job because it had always been his passion, fixing up old cars. "it's hard to decide, but you'll get there. one day it'll come to you, what your passion is. you'll feel it. you're lucky, you can take your time, do different things, see what's right for you. i know you're going to go in to something helping others, you always help others no matter what. hell, you helped me a thousand times over. and definitely in times where I didn't deserve it."

#y. clement #yasha & ben #scinglives

[hlfmoonshine]

clementine's heart picked up and her stomach twisted. she'd always felt important to him, she never doubted their friendship but there was always a step between that. those who loved him and shared the space around him, one space removed from where she wanted to be, and yet here he was telling her that she wasn't there anymore. he had too much to lose, and she had no doubt she was one of those pieces that he couldn't give up. she felt better, even though he was still hurt and laying in a hospital bed, she felt better about it all knowing he held her so close to his heart.

"you aren't exactly old, yet, callum." she said, a poor attempt at humor. she brought her free hand to clasp around his, immediately comforted by his touch, by the change inpressure as he reassured her with a squeeze. "you have thought about it, clearly. i have your back, callum, whatever you want to do you know i'll support you. i've been your cheerleader too long to give up now." she said, a small smile returning to her expression. this was hard, but it wasn't impossible, and if she was going to get through it, it'd only be with him at her side. he'd remind her that she didn't need to be so scared.

"i promise i will never be reckless." he assured her, maybe from time to time he did jump in to things too quickly. because his emotions got the best of him, especially if there was family involved, whenever someone was in the building all he wanted to do was run in and get them out before it was too late. but that was his own pain of losing his parents that tried to get the better of him. "i've got too much to lose these days to be reckless."

he looked at her for a moment and thought about what she said, he didn't feel pushed to stop. but part of him just knew it was time. what if he had died today? what if izzy lost her dad as well? he knew that pain of having no parents, he never wanted to do that to her. "it's something i've been thinking about for a while." he confessed, squeezing her hand softly. "giving it up, going in to something else. training, something like that. i'm not getting any younger, now i've got people to take care of, to be there for. maybe it's time for me to take a step back."

#c. molina #clementine & callum #scinglives

[hlfmoonshine]

coen only nodded, he was used to her medical opinion, he was used to pain and recovery and the misery that accompanied the terrible ways he'd hurt himself over the years. it had started with the fighting, a way to make money, following in his father's footsteps even as he protested against it. then there were the parties, the drugs, the sex, the reckless behavior that was only spurned on by his depression and self hatred. he finally kicked that, keeping only to fighting so that he never backslid into the darker parts of his twenties. when sofia had walked into his life, she'd tried to get him to give it up. quit fighting, quit scaring her. he wouldn't let her near for the first few months of their friendship.

not great. coen wasn't narcissistic enough to think that it could be him, that she would still be upset or that his appearance was enough to throw her world off. he assumed she was happy, or at least better off without him. most people were. "it's not a stupid question." how could she think otherwise, once again in the er, bothering her. "i am good, sof. besides the fender bender, of course." could he brag? could he tell her about school, about eleanor and rory and booker? could he tell her that he'd stopped fighting? "i've been—i'm sorry things aren't good for you, i've only ever wished good for you. i'm sure me showing up back here isn't helping either."

sofia could feel her heart pounding beneath her chest as she tried to focus on him and how he was. trying to focus on getting him stitched up, but her mind was somewhere else. she was having his child, and standing right in front of him when he had no idea. she could feel her hand shaking slightly but steadied it, giving herself a mental pep talk. get your head in the game. "you won't feel hurt yet, but trust me you're going to feel it in the morning." she said softly as he sat down.

she paused when he asked how things were with her and frankly she didn't know what to say. "not great." she confessed as she kept her eyeline on his stitches for the time being. she missed him, she had been so in love with him but knew that she couldn't keep being with him. she knew that it wasn't going to end well, but her heart still hurt after their break up. every day she just wanted to see him again and speak to him, but then as soon as she found she was pregnant it had been like a whirlwind. every day she thought about telling him and couldn't build up the courage to do it. "i'd ask how you've been, but that seems like a stupid question." she murmured and couldn't help but allow the words to leave her mouth. "i miss you though." she confessed and felt a lump in her throat, dammit. these hormones were driving her crazy, she was not a crier.

#c. eden #coen & sofia #scinglives

[hlfmoonshine]

itty bitty reminder that if we are mutuals, i always prefer to have threads with you.

[hlfmoonshine]

his teasing had an effect, even if she tried to deny it, there was no ignoring the fact that her smile quirked and her cheeks tinged pink. "whiskey sour," she corrected him, cheeky grin of her own as she glanced at him, "tequila is for making mistakes, i wouldn't want to consider giving you the time of day as making a mistake. i'm sure you wouldn't want that either, trying to get back into my good graces and all." she teased back, though they both know he'd never been in any graces with her, good or bad. she was just weary.

the rush of adrenaline he gets is instant, like winning big at a slot machine. "you drive a hard bargain," charlie teases, dark eyes never leaving her as he waves down the bartender and offers his card in exchange for her drink. "one drink is worth getting back in your good graces," he continues, as if he ever was in the first place. charlie's brow furrows as he makes a show of looking her over. "are you sure about the whiskey? i would've guessed tequila."

#e. porter #emerald & charlie #wildhcrses

[hlfmoonshine]

me: i'm done writing, i don't have the energy @tyliocellier posts a reply me: well fuck. i guess i am not done writing.

#tyliocellier #i love you and our babes

[hlfmoonshine]

tylio held her and the spinning slowed. her heart still pounded, there was still too much to tell him, about her mother, about how tate had raised herself, about how her name hadn't been tate back then, about how she had spiraled when she finally escaped. she still had to admit that she hadn't seen her father in twenty something years, and how she hadn't seen her mother in twelve. she finally relaxed into his embrace, letting the breath she'd been holding out.

"the morning of the dinner." tate said, tears still swimming in her eyes, threatening to spill down her cheeks once more. "the first time since he left, he sent me an email, got my information from somewhere, and sent me a long email." she hadn't responded, she still didn't know how, or what she would even say. "my dad left, just like he left the priest, who was ruined. the church kicked him to the curb, he moved to the states i think, his family stayed in town, even after my mother and i moved away." tate felt the hiccups coming, the ones that weren't quite hiccups but stuttered breath as she tried to calm herself.

"i didn't talk to my mother either, she didn't do anything after the whole thing. i graduated, changed my name, partied too much and too hard for most of my twenties." she admitted, shame painting her cheeks a deep vermillion.

As soon as she started telling her story, a concerned frown creased the center of Tylio's forehead. He had long suspected that something like an affair may have taken place, but he didn't realize that it had such far reaching consequences. He also wasn't aware of the depth of the scandal - her father not only had an affair with a priest, but also abandoned his family right afterwards. For a moment, Tylio could picture her. Tate, standing there as a small child, wondering where her father had gone and why the family was no longer attending church. Why her mother was now drinking so much, and why everything around her was falling apart. She must have blamed herself for it. That was what children were good at, after all.

Tate's fear of abandonment was starting to make sense to him. "Tate, I'm so sorry...", was all he could think to say at first, but then he stepped forward to take her into his arms. She seemed tense, unsurprisingly, but he still pulled her into his embrace. It felt almost as though she was going to fall apart just now, but he knew she wouldn't. Tate was a lot stronger than she probably realized. He could see it often, her resilience and her qualities, it was too bad she had such trouble seeing them in herself.

While he held her, he also began to wonder something else. With her father gone and the way they met...was Tate's past also part of the reason she was interested in him? He cursed himself for having that thought, but it did cross his mind. He was older, considerably so, and he was generally the one to console her when she was worried or scared or upset. He was not quite old enough to be her father, but there was a gap and learning that she did not have any decent parental figures, it irked him. But he shouldn't think that way. If anything, this just meant he had to try harder to help and understand her. "Did he ever contact you?", Tylio wondered aloud, because he almost couldn't imagine that not a single letter or phone call or email had been sent in all those years. He knew it was possible, though. People did these kinds of things.

#t. o'brien #tate & tylio #tyliocellier