heyjudethedude

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Yuriko Kotani /  Russell Howard’s Stand Up Central

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“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

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Just want to be clear about my boundaries.

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when you smoke weed one time

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“Smoking canabis isn’t about withdrawing from your family. It’s about altering your perception of them … so they’re tolerable”

Disjointed (via bretro)

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Disjointed

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“ This isn’t a story about Forgiveness, it’s about Revenge ”

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Ready to head back to Spain

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Fun facts about your sign here

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Hazel Scott playing two pianos at the same damn time with ease

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Hazel Scott playing two pianos at the same damn time with ease

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I wish I could ignore you, like you ignore me

5.08am thoughts (via lust-is-me)

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Aries: We didn’t realize we were making memories. We just knew we were having fun. Taurus: Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend. Gemini: Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can’t we go back to page one and do it all over again? Cancer: Some people care too much, I think it’s called love. Leo: Life is a journey to be experienced, not a problem to be solved. Virgo: “I don’t feel very much like Pooh today,” said Pooh. Libra: Sometimes the smallest things take up the most space in your heart. Scorpio: How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard? Sagittarius: Promise me you’ll always remember: you’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. And more loved than you’ll ever know. Capricorn: Any day spent with you is my favorite day. So, today is my favorite day. Aquarius: A friend is one of the nicest things you can have & one of the best things you can be. Pisces: I think we dream so that we don’t have to be apart so long. If we’re in each other’s dreams we can be together all the time.

—A Winnie The Pooh quote for every sign. (via sodiumforsaltytimes)

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The best translations into English do not, in fact, read as if they were originally written in English. The English words are arranged in such a way that the reader sees a glimpse of another culture’s patterns of thinking, hears an echo of another language’s rhythms and cadences, and feels a tremor of another people’s gestures and movements.

Ken Liu, Translator’s Postscript to The Three Body Problem by Liu Cixin (via theletterkilleth)

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Where you can find the signs at:

Aries: Horse racing bet Taurus: Some fancy event Gemini: Online Cancer: The library Leo: The Mall Virgo: Hair salon Libra: Lying on their bed Sagittarius: Tattoo shop Capricorn: The gym/ swimming pool Aquarius: Hitchhiking to Wonderland Pisces: Some music concert Scorpio: You can’t find them, they’ll find you *obviously* It’s just for fun

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the most sensitive signs

fire: leo

earth: virgo

air: libra

water: pisces