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grammil · 6 days

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shidou is a mother figure post

I don't know how to start this let's just get to it

cr: voice drama 1, voice drama 2, amane's vd, timelines

Family as a priority

I want to put as a disclaimer that I believe Shidou was an absent part of the family. He is bad at handling children, and he doesn't seem to be good at partnership either (saying he was relying on his wife). Gunsli explains it all in this post.

That said, the fact that he talks so much about prioritizing family above everything, and the way he's associated with children not only in his own behavior (his attitude towards Amane and Es) but symbolically (his first vd is named "Molech" which is associated with child sacrifices, and his name consists of kanjis "lion" and "child") has always been curious to me. Looking at it through the lens of traditional values and gender roles.

Shidou is a person who wants to be a Proper Member Of Society.

Why did you choose your current workplace? Because I thought it'd let me contribute to society.

So I'm not surprised that he got a "proper" profession which gives him a respectable, helpful position in society (which we see being recreated in the prison) and a "proper" family with wife and two kids at a pretty young age (judging by his children's appearances he was likely younger than 25 when they were born. Talking about this, education in medicine fields takes a long time, so he could be still in university or freshly graduated from university). However, rather than establishing himself through this social position, he's trying to establish himself through family and position of a father and a husband. "Family", "love" and "parenthood" are all strong motifs in his story, also considering he's paralleled with Mahiru who is very much "traditional family is the path to happiness in life". And in the end he prioritized saving his family member(s) over staying loyal to his work principles.

He also realized "what he was taking away from people" only after losing his own family.

"In order to save the life of someone you don't know, please let me kill your family," I told them. It doesn't even take much thinking to realize how cruel that is, but… I didn't realize it until the very end.

So his family was more of a value for him than his work, ideologically. The way he talks about his work in general makes me feel like he didn't really go for it as a "career". Like he chose it because he couldn't think of any another way to be "helpful" to others and not because it was interesting for him personally or promising financial stability.

Have you contributed to society? I had thought my work was a contribution to society.

Since I can provide treatment, I have to do something about it.

But… because I was forgiven, I was able to save the lives of the other prisoners. That’s the truth. …I can’t ask you to not forgive me anymore. If I’m not alive, then I can’t protect their lives.

I… I took a lot of pride in my work. I considered it a good deed.

I thought so, too. Doing it for a good cause... without a single doubt.

I think that Shidou perceives being a father/husband as something more honorable for him than being a doctor. Which is something associated with the gender role of a woman rather than the gender role of a man. In traditional gender roles men are supposed to prioritize career; being a good father and a husband is a bonus, achievement, but it's not the first thing that is supposed to define you. While women are supposed to be mothers and wives, to the point that "woman", "mother" and "wife" are synonyms - it's not an achievement but a standard. Father/husband is Shidou's standard. Besides, he became one at a pretty young age, and was likely preparing for it from an even younger age:

I started going out with my wife in the 2nd year of middle school, and we've been together ever since.

Finding a partner and getting married early is also something more expected from a woman than from a man. As I mentioned, while we don't know the exact ages of Shidou's children and his age when he got married, it's possible his family was completed before he finished university or right after it. Which makes me think of Mahiru again. I talk about it in detail in children and adults but here's a snippet from it:

When Mahiru shows obsession with romance, she's not only searching for ultimate happiness and way to brighten her possibly depressing life, but also for the sense of independency, in the only way that she can think of while growing up sheltered. She is almost finishing university but is not thinking about getting a job because do women even need jobs? Marriage and children are way more important matters to think about.

And it also makes me think of Mikoto, from the same post:

But he's doing everything that adults do! Have a job, overwork yourself, live alone. I don't remember where I've seen it, but someone mentioned that his apartment has really few pieces of furniture but there's a TV that is a symbol of "wealth", even though in the current year barely anyone watches TV, especially not someone who is 23. He also asks Kazui what kind of hobbies he has because he wants to have something he can do for a long time, maybe because Kazui is the oldest in the prison and significantly older than Mikoto compared to Shidou. "Being an adult" is like a checklist, once you check everything, you can be reassured that you're now mature and independent.

And here I see contrast between two male characters who want to be Proper Members Of Society (and take pride in being ones rather than Fuuta and Kazui who are miserable about not being ones).

Do you have a desire to get married? Yup. But that’s a story for after I’ve accumulated a good enough track record and go independent though.

What was the cause of your parents' divorce? He chose work over family. But well, at least that's what my mom told me, so who knows!

Because Mikoto, being the only man in the family, thinks that he must first establish himself as a professional in his field before he can even consider the possibility of having a partner. So, the fact that Shidou thought of getting a family and a job simultaneously, and possibly got a romantic partner even before he thought of his career plans (2nd year of middle school is like 13-14 years) is interesting to me. Shidou actually puts quite a big focus on romantic relationships in general.

Tell us about your dating history. I don't remember much but, I had one girlfriend in kindergarten, and in elementary school I had two relationships. I started going out with my wife in the 2nd year of middle school, and we've been together ever since.

Which makes me think of Mahiru again. They even have extremely similar answers sometimes.

What is the ultimate form of Love? Being together until death do us part. Being always together.

What are you willing to sacrifice for love? Everything. Everything.

Would you rather be the one to confess your love, or would you rather receive a confession? I think I'm the type to prefers to be the one confessing. I want to be the one to do it! Eh-! But I've always been the one confessing, so maybe I want to try being confessed to for once!

What is the definition of happiness? To be promised an unchanging tomorrow. Having a romantic heart.

Which implies they have a similar "romantic", idealized mindset on life and especially on partnership and family.

Did you have a good relationship with your family? Yes. It really was a family as happy as you could dream of.

And the fact that Mahiru has an idealized mindset on partnership has a lot to do with her being a woman. Romantic narratives are targeted at girls and women, and they are typically not expected to have interests outside of romance. The easiest example is that "shounen" as a category is more associated with adventure and action genres while "shoujo" as a category is more associated with romantic stories that explore people's feelings towards each other in-depth. Mahiru takes her knowledge on human relationships from these idealized stories. So again it's interesting to me how much Shidou shares the romantic mindset with her, like he was also taught it and lives by it.

Caretaker > protector

Shidou is exposing his savior complex in t2. Now, it's rather the gender role of a man that is associated with being a "savior" (prince saving the princess and whatnot). "Doctor" is also rather associated with men, while nurses/assistants are associated with women. But the thing is how Shidou "saves" people/takes care of them, especially in comparison to other characters.

Characters that have traditionally masculine traits (in behavior, appearance, or symbolism) are Fuuta, Kazui, Kotoko and John/Mikoto (uh, depending on who you think is who but I'll use just Mikoto). They all used brute force to protect other people, and have a focus on "physical strength" in general (the first three have a timeline conversation on this topic, and all four were involved with Kotoko's attacks). Fuuta, in t1, entered the interrogation being prepared for a fight and called himself the representative of the prisoners, because he was told by Yuno that Es was cruel to her during the interrogation; even on the internet he used verbal violence to "protect" others with bringing justice and punishing the wrongdoers. Kazui was sent to work in police and protected Fuuta from Kotoko's attack because his physical build allows him to do so. Kotoko and Mikoto self-explanatory.

Shidou though:

Mahiru: Shidou-san…… you’re really good-looking. Personally I think you’d be better if you ate a bit more, but you’re slim and tall, and well put together to boot…… You must’ve been super popular up until now, right?

State the meaning of your name. I think it means to wish to become strong like a lion. It seems I don't live up to that name at all.

Shidou is implied to not be physically strong. While we're here on the topic of appearance, I want to mention that he's said to be good-looking and popular among women several times:

Jackalope: Prisoner 05, Shidou. Well, I guess after me he’s the second most handsome here. But they always say the best-looking guys are nothing but trouble. Not that I’d know.

which makes me think of bishounen trope (bishounen refers to those younger than 18-20 but this is the most well-known term in non-Japanese fandom spaces so I'm using it):

(x) A popular Asian character type, the bishōnen, or "beautiful boy", is a male character that possesses androgynous or "feminine" physical traits. He is usually tall, slender with almost no fat and little to no muscle, and no body or facial hair.

Actually the very emphasis on his appearance can be seen as something associated with women, or rather the way this emphasis is made. It's worded like his appearance is used as a weapon of sorts.

But they always say the best-looking guys are nothing but trouble.

Shidou: ……yeah, that’s true…… I did my share of fooling around in the past. Mahiru: Oh~? That’s not the sort of answer I’d expect from you. I’ve got it! Somebody told you that if you replied like that people wouldn’t resent you so much, right?

In narratives especially, appearance being used as a weapon is mostly associated with female characters (femme fatale trope and such).

Back to the topic of saviors. The way Fuuta, Kazui, Kotoko and Mikoto are being helpful/caring to other people is through being protectors, guardians, shields and weapons. But Shidou is being helpful through being a caretaker and a healer. He doesn't protect from the attack but he helps to recover after it. This is a traditionally feminine way to be a "savior". Men are soldiers while women are nurses and such. Compared to traditionally masculine characters who are rather reactive and preparing for future attacks,

Kotoko: ……Mukuhara Kazui. Thanks to you, I wasn’t able to properly serve justice to those who did something unforgivable. I’m currently acting as an agent for our prison guard Es. Don’t get in my way next time. Kazui: Oi oi, don’t be silly, Yuzuriha-chan. There’s no way I could just look away from your outrageous display of violence. Anyway, even disregarding the fact violence against those voted guilty isn’t a part of Milgram’s system, what you’re doing is just acting recklessly based on a broad interpretation. As long as I’m free myself, I’ll stop you.

Shidou is calm, soft-spoken and providing, staying in the rear.

What are your thoughts on Amane's changes? The adults need to do something about it. It's frustrating because I can't move due to treating people's injuries, so I have no choice but to leave it to someone else.

As I mentioned earlier, the way he talks about his job makes me feel like he chose it because he couldn't think of any another way to be "helpful" to others. So putting these two ideas together he decided to be helpful through a traditionally feminine way.

While we're here (again) there's something that was noted by a person on twt back in t1, that post is now deleted I think but it stayed in my mind.

Shidou means "lion" (獅) (shi) and "juvenile, child" (童) (dou).

The first kanji means literally just "lion", but that person connected it to Chinese guardian lions:

(x) The male lion has his right front paw on a type of cloth ball simply called an "embroidered ball" (繡球; xiù qiú), which is sometimes carved with a geometric pattern. The female is essentially identical, but has a cub under the left paw, representing the cycle of life. Symbolically, the female lion protects those dwelling inside (the living soul within), while the male guards the structure (the external material elements).

There's also that one of Shidou's main narrative foils is Kotoko who is a woman expressing traditionally masculine traits (physically strong, makes being someone's "fang" (again, shield/weapon) her whole personality, puts a lot of emphasis on intelligence and logic, etc.) Kotoko is a woman who is fighting while Shidou is a man who is healing. Kotoko is muscular and has somewhat unremarkable appearance (with short hair that is easy to maintain and sport clothes, easily disguising herself) while Shidou is slim and noted to be handsome several times, like his appearance is one of his "strengths" or rather something he can use as a weapon. They are paralleled through being Amane's teachers:

Amane: ……what’s wrong, Shidou-san? Your hand has stopped marking. This is mathematics, so there’s no questions about the answers. If I got something wrong, please mark it with an X. Shidou: I…… I just don’t understand. If everything about MILGRAM is true…… why did a child like you have to become a murderer? Just imagining what sort of circumstances must have led to that, it makes me so sad……

……please give me back my test. It seems you don’t have the concentration levels required to be my teacher. I’m going to get Kotoko-san to teach me instead.

Kotoko: Treat you like a child? Hah, you’ve got to be kidding. Back when I was your age, I was already the person I am today. I don’t have any plans to let you get away with something just “because you’re a child.” ……remember that. There, I’ve finished marking. 83%. How do I put it… Even though you act like this, it’s not like you’re super brilliant at studying or anything, huh.

Kotoko puts a lot of emphasis on intelligence and logic as I mentioned earlier, Nott has some posts going in more detail about it (here and here). In these interactions with Amane I find it interesting that Shidou gets carried away and is considered incapable of teaching because he gets distracted by emotions. While Kotoko is rational, stoic, and criticizes, even scolds Amane as needed. Do I need to explain the stereotype that women are emotional and incapable of thinking while men are level-headed and the only ones capable of science. Especially that the emotion that distracts Shidou is pity towards a child.

Motherly behavior

More about traditional gender roles. "Mother" is expected to be soft and caring but also dedicated to the children and always looking after them. That often results in a behavior that is delicate on the surface but overcontrolling in its nature. "Mother knows best" sort of thing. (Shidou can be explained with a single "mother knows best" so well that I wish I could end here, but I'm a yapper) Which is a behavior that Shidou expresses a lot, and it also comes back to what I mentioned about him being heavily associated with children in his behavior: out of all prisoners, he's the one who is always somewhere near young prisoners trying to force his concern onto them. His good intentions ending up in behaviors that are intrusive and uncomfortable, or him straight up saying "you're wrong let me explain how to do everything Properly" but disguising it with "I'm just concerned".

Now, Shidou, in general, appears pretty non-pushy in his personality. In the beginning of the trials, he seems kind of shy in conversations with people, often makes pauses in his speech, like he's hesitant or careful, or gets lost in his thoughts/prefers to keep his thoughts to himself (like in the conversation where he's teaching Amane). He doesn't want to bother and is not good at communication.

Shidou: ……do you mind if we talk? It seems you’ve relaxed a bit more recently, Kusunoki-kun.

I see…… In which case, I wonder if I could ask for a box of cigarettes? I don’t want to be a burden, so I don’t mind if it’s the same brand as whatever Mukuhara-san is getting.

Shidou: ………… Is that so… I apologise. I’m sure everyone else will be happy to eat it, so don’t worry about it. Sorry for intruding.

I'm not sure what to say to that…

He's also noted to be reserved in his expressions.

Shidou: No, I know nothing. ……I’ve never really had an expressive face.

With the same expression no matter who comes I don’t feel scared because I don’t know

Presumably because he's suppressing his emotions in general, ending up feeling lost and indifferent in a way.

“NO” in my dream I am making you cry again, I am being blamed “NO” the hesitation I killed Is holding its breath and sniffing out lies

It becomes more and more diluted, it doesn’t have any flavor even if it’s chewed If it’s not needed, I’m not interested Here and there is such a waste There’s no meaning in it, yes and no, it doesn't matter. It’s all how you say it

No thank you, it’s none of your concern

The correct answer, I don’t yet know But there are lives that need safeguarding

That is to say I think Shidou is straight up shy and somewhat anxious person. So he is quite soft-spoken and delicate in his behavior. Nott noted on this topic that the way he cuts flowers in Throw Down is tender, he's not shown doing anything brutish. And the way he forces his concern onto young prisoners also appears pretty delicate on the surface. He's not being sharp like Kotoko. But behind this seemingly soft attitude is an anxious desire to control his environment, so everything can be Proper, the world can be the way he wants it to be so nothing bad can happen again.

What is the definition of happiness? To be promised an unchanging tomorrow.

Because mother knows best, and knows what should be done so everything can be good. And so his attitude towards young prisoners starts as soft and develops to be more and more forceful in a subtle way.

Shidou: That’s good…… You were crying so much, so I was concerned for you. ……yeah, I’m sure. Your family will definitely be worrying about you. I…… hope you can go back soon. Mu: Shidou-san…… did you come here to comfort me……? I’m sorry, I’d thought you were…… a scary person…… fufu.

Shidou: Sakurai-kun……? Show me your hand. Haruka: Heh!? No, I…… There’s, n-n-nothing wrong. Shidou: Show me. ……the palm of your hand is bleeding. I’ll have to disinfect it.

Amane: I don’t need it. I’ll gratefully accept your well-wishes, but I don’t eat things like that. Also…… Shidou-san, I can’t say I’m especially fond of the way you assume that all children will love frivolous things like this. Shidou: ………… Is that so… I apologise. I’m sure everyone else will be happy to eat it, so don’t worry about it. Sorry for intruding.

Shidou: Amane…… I don’t think that’s true. However smart you may be…… you’re still just a child.

Shidou: No, I don’t understand. It’s my job as an adult to teach you that throwing a temper tantrum isn’t going to make everything go your way. If it’s a test of endurance you want, I’m happy to oblige, Amane.

Through both of his voice dramas he's trying to convince Es to make their judgement according to his advice.

You're being annoyingly persistent, Shidou! Know your place here.

Because he knows better.

If you want to hand down the correct punishment for me, then all you have to do is put an end to my life and it'll be over in a blink of an eye.

This sick joke, I can’t take it any more, I surrender You don’t even know yet, and yet

It's also like he is constantly evaluating Es' capability in their interactions. Explaining when they make a mistake, or praising them when they're right in their knowledge.

Ah, well… I was just thinking about how despite being a child, you've really done your research on this.

I don't know what circumstances you face while guarding this prison nor the reason as to why you're doing it, but I'm sure that it must take a toll on you emotionally as well. So, please do your best. *Pats head*

Shidou: I see… If I feel pain, then it's proof that I want to live? Es: Hmph! Shidou: ...Well, with that being said, here's my counterargument to it. It was the nociceptors in my shin which felt that pain. So, it's nothing more than a reaction caused by pain signals being transmitted to my spinal cord and then to my brain. That phenomenon is called nociceptive pain. Es: What? Shidou: What I'm saying is… Even if I do want to die, pain is something which will still involuntarily occur. And therefore, you, Es-kun, were making a mistake in your claim.

Shidou: Let's digress for a moment. Have you studied criminal law? Es: Well, the most important parts at least. I've been learning about it since I started working as the Guard. Shidou: Excellent. So, for example, if someone harbors a criminal or tampers with evidence in order to protect that criminal, that is a crime in itself, right? Es: That's articles 103 and 104. Shidou: You remembered well. Can you recall article 105 as well?

Nott has a post on Shidou and Mahiru paralleling Amane's parents. Here's a more proper/elaborate phrasing of my tags on it: I think that Amane's situation, the way both of her parents are emotionally neglecting and her mother is abusive, makes her view her parents as sort of concepts. A concept of criticizing and overcontrolling parent on one side - her mother, and a concept of loving parent that will praise her but doesn't have enough time for her on the other side - her father. Shidou and Mahiru end up paralleling these concepts. With Shidou being the concept of "overcontrolling mother".

Amane: Shidou Kirisaki… His actions violate our rules. I have given him a warning. If he continues, I suppose it will be inevitable for me to intervene.

State the name of your victim. There is no victim. Only those who were served punishment.

Is there anything you wish your parents would have done? My mother should have kept her faith to the very end.

Is there anyone you hold in high esteem? My father. My father has been on a journey for a while, but that is something very honorable.

What are your thoughts on Amane's changes? If I were healthy, I would want to play with her a lot…

What do the people you respect think about your sin? I just followed what I've been taught. So obviously they'll praise me and tell me that I did good.

If you had to make one of the prisoners part of your family, who would you choose? Shiina Mahiru. Her innate goodness might have brought the two of us closer, maybe.

Flowers & pomegranates

Smaller details that might or might not be relevant but Shidou is heavily associated with flowers and flowers are associated with femininity. His image color is violet/wisteria/lavender shade all of which are derived from flower names. The other characters I can remember being associated with flowers are female characters who are the most gender-conforming out of the cast.

Also pomegranates or something

(x) Zeus, it is said, permitted Hades, who was in love with the beautiful Persephone, to abduct her as her mother Demeter was not likely to allow her daughter to go down to Hades. Persephone was gathering flowers, along with the Oceanids, Artemis, and Triton's daughter Pallas, as the Homeric Hymn says, in a field when Hades came to abduct her, bursting through a cleft in the earth. After Persephone had disappeared, Demeter searched for her all over the earth with Hecate's torches. In most versions, she forbids the earth to produce, or she neglects the earth and, in the depth of her despair, she causes nothing to grow. When Hades was informed of Zeus' command to return Persephone, he complied with the request, but he first tricked her into eating pomegranate seeds. Hermes was sent to retrieve Persephone but, because she had tasted the food of the underworld, she was obliged to spend a third of each year (the winter months) there, and the remaining part of the year with the gods above.

From what I know this story is focused on the grief of a mother/reunion of a mother and her child although in mass media it's interpreted in the context of romantic relationships.

Regardless of how she had eaten pomegranate seeds and how many, the ancient Greeks told the myth of Persephone to explain the origin of the four seasons. The ancient Greeks believed that spring and summer occurred during the months Persephone stayed with Demeter, who would make flowers bloom and crops grow bountiful. During the other months when Persephone must live in the underworld with Hades, Demeter expressed her sadness by letting the earth go barren and covering it with snow, resulting in autumn and winter.

There are trees without leaves outside but trees with leaves reflecting in the windows. There are also both dry/wilting and living flowers in the greenhouse. Also the general switching between empty real life landscape (which could as well be autumn or early winter) and greenhouse with colorful blooming flowers.

THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!! writing this killed my brain in million ways I can't do this anymore

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grammil · 6 days

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The Futa and Mikoto dynamic in the latest minigram-

MILGRAM EP57 "Caffeine"

[57-1]

Mahiru: Would anyone like some coffee?

Yuno: Do you have any sugar?

Mahiru: Of course!

Yuno: Thank you very much.

Mahiru: Want some sugar?

roar

Futa: Why are you only asking me?!

[57-2]

Mikoto: I don't think she meant anything by it.

Futa: I can't keep my mouth shut when they want to make assumptions and treat me like a little kid.

Futa: It's bitter.

Mikoto: (Maybe it's because you act like this.)

Mikoto: It's a matter of taste.

Mikoto: So, I don't think it relates to being a kid or an adult.

Mikoto: Also, you should apologize later.

Futa: How about you then?

Mikoto: Me?

Mikoto: I've gotten used to drinking coffee.

Mikoto: It's not really a love/hate thing.

OVERTIME

ENDLESS PHONE CALLS

PILES OF WORK

Mikoto: Coffee was more like something like a must have...

Futa: ?

The way Mikoto says taste has nothing to do with being a child or adult. That mindset right there is why I believe Amane let's her guard down around him and allows herself to be childish when he's around.

21/04/16 (Amane’s First Trial)

Amane: …………

Mikoto: Oh, welcome back Amane! ……what’s with the grim face? Ah, right, the guard summoned you! How was it? Did you cry? I bet you were so scared you cried, right!?

Amane: ……alright then. If it’s a fight you want, it’s a fight you’ll get.

Mikoto: Huh? Oooi! Hey, are you listening?? Ooooi!

Along with why, when he became more standoffish in response to her verdict and she saw him being avoided, she began to avoid others. Turning people away when they approached her as she saw them not approaching him. So, she may have gotten the impression that others were only approaching her due to her age, not because they cared about her.

Something that could give further context to Shidou noting Mikoto and his behavior specifically in his second trial written interrogation,

Q.07 Are there any prisoners you get along with?

Shidou: Kayano-kun has become like that, and I can’t spend my time smoking at the moment, so the smoking trio has disbanded, which is a bit lonely.

Despite him and amikoto around this same time being drawn smoking together. Along with Kazui literally encouraging Shidou to take breaks in the timeline as well. Plus, Mikoto's change in attitude having very little to do with him not smoking to his own admission in the same answer. Like he states he just hasn't had the time to do it at the moment but starts with noting Mikoto's attitude isn't helpful. Probably because he thinks Amane is mirroring him and he's not srtying a good example for the kids. Which isn't his fucking responsibility since he's in a high stress situation for one.

Secondly, despite being like this, he's still better with kids than Shidou is. Let that fucking sink in.

Amane let's herself be childish around Mikoto because he's less likely to judge her solely based on being a child. Instead as he would treat her like any other person. He'd treat her as herself and someone he only knows about through their own individual actions.

Not base his judgment of her off of something she has no control over like her age-

20/06/13

Amane: ……what’s wrong, Shidou-san? Your hand has stopped marking. This is mathematics, so there’s no questions about the answers. If I got something wrong, please mark it with an X.

Shidou: I…… I just don’t understand. If everything about MILGRAM is true…… why did a child like you have to become a murderer? Just imagining what sort of circumstances must have led to that, it makes me so sad……

Amane: ……*sigh*. Is that right. I don’t think I’m going to get along with you, Shidou-san. I don’t agree with the fact you refuse to acknowledge that I have my own free will, and that I should be held accountable for my actions, just because I’m a child. I may have only been alive for 12 years, but all the choices I’ve made, even if they weren’t the best ones, were entirely my own. What point is there in you getting sad when I have no regrets myself? ……please give me back my test. It seems you don’t have the concentration levels required to be my teacher. I’m going to get Kotoko-san to teach me instead.

Shidou: Amane…… I don’t think that’s true. However smart you may be…… you’re still just a child.

Mikoto, in contrast, recognizes that Mahiru asking Futa if he wanted sugar had nothing to do with her treating him like a child. Instead, this was Mahiru being considerate and taking note of Futa's taste and behavior. Then giving him the opportunity to adjust his drink to his liking. Something that goes totally unappreciated because he gets upset that she didn't ask Mikoto the same thing.

When in all honesty I wouldn't put it past Mahiru to have taken a glance at Mikoto soulessly drinking his coffee and internally go,

"Nothing will make him like this drink. I don't even think he tastes it. There's hope for Futa though."

That's how neutral he is to it. Hell, he even admits he's neutral to the drink in this same conversation. Referring to it as a must-have or a necessity for his job. He's basically just drinking it because it's there, and it's now a habit for him to drink it when it's available due to the environment he was in prior to this. He just mindlessly with no real thought went hey there's coffee might as well get some then when asked went oh yeah I have no feelings towards this drink.

Leaving Futa there confused downright puzzled like of you don't like or hate it why did you voluntary get some as Mikoto is their having trauma flashbacks like,

"God the work, the hours, the phonecalls...coffee my only reprieve and fuel. The thing I needed but..."

Yet this also shows off something about Mikoto that gets overlooked. The guy is no pushover. Even though he doesn't want to be rude he will be direct and tell others when they mess up. Going ad far to tell Futa,

"You should apologize later."

While talking Futa through the mistake of tying taste to maturity.

Because that's a stupid thing to fucking do. Assuming having preferences when it comes to what one eats or a person has to eat a certain food due to their age alone and no other health reasons is stupid.

20/06/03

Futa: ……huh? What’s your problem? You’re just leaving all your meat? What a weird kid.

Amane: You say that, but you’re not eating all of your food either. ……are you not able to eat your vegetables? Even though you’re an adult.

Futa: Huh, what, so you’re just eating grass? What are you, a rabbit or something? Since you’re just a brat, you should be eating your meat properly. You won’t grow if you don’t.

Amane: ……you make some really funny jokes, don’t you, Futa-san.

Eat what you like regardless of age isn't a hard concept to grasp. Going I can't eat this it's too childish or drinking something a way you don't like to seem more mature is a waste of your own time..if it doesn't taste good don't eat if you don't want it politely decline. If you actually do want it eat it.

Mikoto respects Futa's behavior here but ultimately gets the point that Shidou has been failing to get with Amane. If the problem is the act of consuming certain things has been intrinsically tied to a person's age you should remove that pretense entirely by going,

"I don't think it relates to being a kid or an adult."

Taste is just taste. Instead of continually pushing like you're a child, children like sweets come have some pancakes. Can I tempt you into these childlike pleasures, Amane? Shidou they're fucking pancakes they don't have an age restriction you absolute tool. A lot of adults enjoy them, too. Shidou goes through every possible reason Amane should try these things while missing the point of why she ultimately doesn't taste it. Because he's arbitrarily decided she should like and try these things because she's a child and has consistently chosen to ignore the fact she declined.

Unlike Mahiru, who gets yelled at and just leaves. To the point that even Mikoto says Futa should apologize for that. This is why I find the dynamic between Amane and Mikoto, and Futa and Mikoto so interesting. Because when they get upset he stays leveled for the most part and gives them space to be themselves without outwardly labeling their mindsets as childish and immature. Because on some level he gets it which makes him more likely to talk it out to them like they're people instead pf just blatantly lecturing them about being roo childish or immature.

Instead of going you're acting like a child he'll just bluntly go its a bother having you be angry all the time in a way of seeking attention.

20/06/15

Mikoto: Hey, it’s kinda a bother having you be so angry and tense all the time. You should stop trying get everyone to pay attention to you. You’re a uni student, right? You can’t act like that once you start working properly.

Futa: Huh!? Shut up. Not like I care what you say. Even though we’re in this shitty situation, you’re just chatting away, it’s stupid. Aren’t you the one who’s acting out of place here? ……also the fact you give everyone nicknames is just gross.

Mikoto: *sigh* It’s more stupid to be taking this all so seriously. I mean, it’s definitely just a reality TV program. There’s no way a real prison exists that’s this lax. Also, I don’t give nicknames to everyone. I don’t give them to young kids like Amane, or to the hard-to-approach types like Shidou-san. I mean, I’m not giving you one, right?

Futa: ……oi, which group are you trying to say I am?

Futa "I don't care what you say" Kajiyama. Also how do you feel about coffee, which group do I fall under there. You called out my anger as attention seeking well the way you nickname people is gross.

*sigh*

Is right Mikoto it's absolutely right. Even when reprimanding him and bringing something adjacent to age Mikoto still focuses on social standing. How it won't be beneficial and instead inappropriate for Futa to behave how he is here when he does join the workforce. It's a perspective hard to combat because it's reasonable and straightforward. It's also something Mikoto doesn't have to say at all unless he is genuinely concerned in some way. Futa's behavior can lead to him being ostracized or deemed unapproachable and rude in a work environment who cares it's not his job to correct that. He can just learn the hard way like everyone else has to.

Haruka's social skills are kind of poor and could lead to problems with others.

20/06/05

Haruka: Ah…… ah, u-um, Mikoto-san. The c-communication……? thing, that you were saying was important. I-I thought, I’d give it my best…… Um, so, Mikoto-san, what’s your favourite food……?

Mikoto: Ooh? Nice going, Haru-kun~

Yeah, we still have no idea how long this lifestyle will go on for, so it’s best if we all get along together here.

My favourite food…… I like pasta and horse-meat sashimi. Also bubble tea, and recently I’ve been big on custard puddings. What about you?

Haruka: ……ah, I, I wonder…… H-hamburg steak, and omurice, a-and also…… what else? Ah. Cotton candy……

Mikoto: C-cotton candy!? That’s the first time I’ve met someone who has that in their top three favourites!? ……man, Haru-kun, you really are hilarious.

Who cares it's not his job to tell him how to practice that or make sure everyone is communicating well with others. He is in this weird situation it would ve so much easier to just keep to himself and mind his business. Like Kotoko does at the start but instead he behaves in a way similar to Mahiru.

Yet, instead of just talking with others to include them, Mikoto gives them pointers on how to further include themselves. Whether they're talking with him or not. He goes well- Here are these tools that could make communicating easier and more beneficial to you. This is important to setting the right atmosphere now off you go. Then when it works out he's proud of them.

He states they've grown and changed into good people and he doesn't shove the thing in their face or even take any credit for it.

22/10/06 (Mikoto’s Birthday)

Haruka: Mikoto-san. Um, are you ok……?

Mikoto: Ah, Haru-kun. It’s been a while since we last talked, huh. Yeah, I’m fine. Are you doing ok……?

Haruka: Ah, I’m fine. I’ve been enjoying myself, a lot. Um, I’m sorry, for avoiding you. I was a bit scared. Of you, honestly……

Mikoto: Ahhh, yeah. I’ve been lashing out whenever I go to sleep, right? ……it’s fine. Even I think you’re right to be scared.

You know, I kinda just hate that I don’t even know what’s going on myself…… haha.

Ah, but despite all that you still came and talked to me because it’s my birthday, right? Thank you, you’ve grown into a good man.

Then he just continues living like oh that's good proud of you for coming so far back to the suffering I go now.

Haruka: Wait you said you were fine.

Mikoto:

Even when it comes to welcoming Amane back and seeing that she was upset after her interrogation. Why was Mikoto the one who did that and not Shidou?

Why did Mikoto see Amane being quiet and clock that something was up and not the guy literally attempting to force himself in a parental role over her. Why was it when Amane was actually upset he was the only one to take a second and go hey are you good oh wait yeah the interrogation of course you're upset- my god it must have been terrible for you!

Why was he here in regard to any of these situations? When literally anyone else could have been noted. Because Mikoto, unlike Shidou and possibly to Shidou's annoyance- Is good with those Shidou regards as children. When he talks to Amane, she listens and takes him seriously. She even takes notes when Shidou talks to her he gets pancakes thrown in his face. This is all because Mikoto's way of speaking respects that someone is a person first and doesn't emphasize the things they don't have control over and may be sensitive about.

Outside of blatantly telling them like here, being an adult or a child isn't tied to things like that. Because it's not tied to food preferences it's tied to the choices we make and why. Anyone can be a better and more considerate person if we just work on communicating properly with those around us. That sort of mindset and knowing when not to rub someone's face in something because he doesn't rub in Futa's face that he complains about the drink being bitter after complaining about being asked if he wanted sugar which at that point he clearly needed it. No he keeps that's shit to himself and just thinks pinpoints what caused Futa to respond in such a hostile way and goes I don't think that's how that works. He goes to the root insecurity and goes no what you like to eat is not tied to whether you're a child or an adult. It's just what you like to eat or don't.

Which is really good on so many levels and highlights so well why he does get along with most of the younger prisoners.

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