flyingambulist

[flyingambulist]

What's your evil twin doing now?

used him for food provisions in the harsh New England winters

[flyingambulist]

delivers a watergun tank

This has been sitting in my postbox for like 4 years and have you ever had the post office pissed at you about a tank they've had parked in their back lawn for 4 years? Terrible

You'd think they'd have appreciated the extra security I was letting hang around outta the good of my heart

[flyingambulist]

Don't worry about it, kiddo

#i'm just firing shots in the neighborhood to see if I can summon the riffraff

[flyingambulist]

help help Flash I'm being oppressed.

Don't worry Jesse, we'll do nothing to help and then destroy your character for the next ten years so everyone thinks you're Luke Skywalker again until the dawn of time

,,,

and you won't get the gucci boots with that association either

#your second cousin twice removed on your father's uncle's evil clone's side is oppressing me

[flyingambulist]

Haterade chugger

#it's not MY fault they forgot to add Joy into your Powerpuff Girl serum drippies

[flyingambulist]

[flyingambulist]

Alright that's enough of my government mandated 3 posts before vanishing off again

I'll see you guys in the holiday special

[flyingambulist]

Haven't killed me in a way that matters yet

[flyingambulist]

Still remember that password promise from 3 years ago?

Man, next you guys'll be knocking about my car's extended warranty.

#like anyone will even insure me

[flyingambulist]

ellingson.tv on instagram

#weekend projects #but like. to a flash-annoying size.

[flyingambulist]

you'll never guess what I found in a totally unguarded warehouse guys

#it's fine it's fine it's not stealing #i asked a guy in a blue devil suit if it was cool and he was like #'who the hell are you?' which sounds like a Go For It if I've ever heard one #i mean really Cassidy YOU'RE the rude one here

[flyingambulist]

In his belly you will find a new definition of pain and suffering as you are slowly digested over a thousand years.

[flyingambulist]

#babe hey hey Hart I need you for a sec

[flyingambulist]

[He’s lying]

which is worse: the furbies or the puppets

"Oh, for SPROCK's sake. I had FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE PUPPETS DAMMIT!

"The puppets are clearly worse!"

[flyingambulist]

“Happy to be of service, Greenbean!” 

"I never once thought those furby mods could get more horrifying, but you've proven me wrong, James."

[flyingambulist]

[worm offers you a small cup of rooibos tea.]

[do you accept?]

[flyingambulist]

My coworkers: what you'd do with your long weekend?

Me: