flavoredfaeman

[flavoredfaeman]

Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

[flavoredfaeman]

guy who has chronic pain and fatigue: man why can't i do more stuff

[flavoredfaeman]

Being a young adult is so strange. You enter a coffee shop. The 20 year old girl waiting behind you cried all night because she just came to a new city for university and she feels so alone. That 27 year old guy over there works a job he is overqualified for, he lives with his parents and wants to move out but doesn't know what to do about it. That one 24 year old dude already has a car, a house, and a job waiting for him once he graduates thanks to his dad's connections. The 26 year old barista couldn't complete his higher education because he has to work and take care of his family. The 28 year old girl sitting next to you has no friends to go out with so she is texting her mother. That couple (both 25 years old) are married and the girl is pregnant. The 29 year old writing something on her laptop has realized that she chose the wrong major so she is trying to start all over. We are not alone in this, but we are actually so alone. Do you feel me

[flavoredfaeman]

Mods? Take him to the stump of his favorite childhood tree.

[flavoredfaeman]

rewatching the mighty nein and rewitnessing their amount of paranoia is so good. they walk into a 5 star hotel after a battle with the followers of the god of death and a total of 10 hit points and 3 spell slots between all of them and they're still casing their rooms. uv lights out, flipping beds and checking smoke detectors for cameras. they insight check every person they meet. they want to cast a truth spell on the oldest, most powerful and crustiest wizard in all of exandria. theyd rather impale themselves instead of giving up their weapons. theyd rather send a cat with 2 hit points that's determined to roll nat 1s on its perception rolls to check out evil lairs rather than going in themselves. they hate people scrying on them but they get annoyed when they fail doing it to others. they lie to most people they meet yet they're still 'trusted' by the two out of the three great powers on wildemount. no one's doing it like them.

[flavoredfaeman]

idk how to flirt but i can make things awkward if you're into that

[flavoredfaeman]

marcille is very protective (and jealous)

[flavoredfaeman]

local ladies man’s signature move totally useless against autistic monster enthusiast. more on Kabru’s fumble era at 6

[flavoredfaeman]

If u start posting 2009 trek I will weep openly … It was my fav for a hot minute & I only really got into TOS bc of ur art … AOS renaissance would be so beautiful to me

grab some tissues then because i have in fact done some sketches…..tos are still my guys, but aos is a good time :] glad to hear you’ve gotten into tos too !!!

bones^2

#THEM #BONES #🥺

[flavoredfaeman]

wizard losing a bid

[flavoredfaeman]

failed my bechdel test AND my prostate exam 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 #finalsweek

[flavoredfaeman]

im starting to think you guys dont like it when stories make you feel things

[flavoredfaeman]

not divulging my thoughts on star trek (2009) rn. but this scene is like a cartoon to me

[flavoredfaeman]

hey why are there loose plot threads in my fucking different every time game show

[flavoredfaeman]

"con artist" is maybe the profession with the biggest gap between How Cool They Are In Media and How Cool They Are In Real Life

[flavoredfaeman]

in media i love when love is painful i love when love makes you scream and fall to your knees and rip your hair out i love when love is crushing and deafening

[flavoredfaeman]

(after getting attacked by a one-episode creature) whatever that was, it's gone now...