feralg0blin

[feralg0blin]

humans are a subspecies of elf known for dying really quickly and being stressed the whole time

[feralg0blin]

there is a huge difference between criticizing an institution and criticizing individual behavior. i can criticize the makeup industry without criticizing the 14 year old girl who uses concealer because she’s self-conscious about her acne; i can criticize the plastic surgery industry without vilifying the woman who decided to get a nose job after two decades of pointed comments and bullying. it is intellectually dishonest to respond to an institutional criticism as if it were a personal attack; on the flip side, it is cruel and unnecessary to leverage personal attacks in the name of institutional criticism

if i see one (1) more person respond to a perfectly reasonable beauty-industry-critical sentiment with “but i personally enjoy eyeshadow. why are you attacking people who like eyeshadow :(” or “exactly, all women who wear makeup are miserable and brainwashed” i am going to climb a tree and bite the top of it

[feralg0blin]

soon it'll be dawn again

[feralg0blin]

THEY CAN REST NOW

[feralg0blin]

started calling my executive dysfunction issues my board of dysfunctional executives and treating it like a room of frail old white men and it hasn't fixed everything but it sure is fucking funny

[feralg0blin]

[feralg0blin]

[feralg0blin]

my mom’s trans allyship is on another level

[feralg0blin]

This was shared as a "bad" joke but I was so charmed by it I've been thinking about it for days.

[feralg0blin]

[feralg0blin]

as an aroace, im particularly dangerous, because i wont fuck or marry. i only know how to kill.

[feralg0blin]

my older relatives on facebook when they find out i think poor ppl shouldnt starve

[feralg0blin]

ye murph spectrum

(he who makes my favorite characters. and cody is there)

[feralg0blin]

oh you like history? name everything that ever happened

[feralg0blin]

His shitty attitude and grabbable waist have bewitched me

[feralg0blin]

Consider:

You died with a remarkable fortune and no heirs. You grant your wealth to two rivalling schools in the same city, under one condition: One of them must always keep your preserved skull. They may keep it on display (therefore attracting interest and potentially fame to the school) but that always raises the risk of students of the other school stealing it. The students and staff of the other school have not only the right, but the duty to do so at any opportunity. Nobody can be arrested for this unless they're caught breaking some other law.

Ideally, the students of the two schools keep stealing your skull, back and forth, forever. The culture of both of the schools is enriched by this activity, the students are too busy engaged in these harmless shenanigans to drift into worse habits and behaviours, and you get to be included in countless nonsensically frivolous heist operations whose sole purpose is to bring more fun into the world.

[feralg0blin]

I like to think Sir Theobold "carries a full scroll of his liege's titles on him at all times" Gumbar does the exact opposite of the full-naming the princesses when they're in trouble.

"Heir apparent, Princess Jet Rocks, First of her Name, Duchess of Gumberly, and Lady of the Realm"? Normal day. Casual conversation.

*a very tired bear voice* "Jet."

Oh shit someone's getting grounded.