fedpawstered

[fedpawstered]

Vent post to ramble about intersex issues.

Honestly I'm just now starting to feel intersex on an emotional level, despite having known for years. It has taken so much time to start working through the shame and sense of powerlessness built up over a decade, because the medical system is so fucking violent toward intersex people for NO reason.

Beyond forced "corrective" surgery — that's the big one everyone is aware of. Allowing parents to force their newborn through a sex change. Literally doing the hyperbolic conservative's worst nightmare about trans people and everyone's just fucking fine with it. But aside from that.

Since I was a sweaty, awkward teen with a five o'clock shadow, I've been told, "FEMALE‼️ DEFECTIVE FEMALE‼️ YOU WANT SURGERY FOR BABY⁉️ 👶 WE WILL GIVE YOU SURGERY FOR BABY, AND MAYBE HORMONES TO MAKE YOU LESS MANISH‼️"

I've told my doctor, my parents, any adult who asked, point blank, I never want children and would rather drink bleach than incubate one. But it's always, "You're still young, you might want that option in the future." As if I'm not enthralled with my infertility, as if pregnancy is the end goal of every female, as if I'm female to begin with.

And the shame of being classed as a disorder. One that so few doctors have seen that specialists have treated me like a lab experiment, and one even asked me to induce menstruation and come in while I'm bleeding so he can poke around. AFTER admitting that he didn't know what was going on down there. Just. "I'll have to refer you to a different specialist, but can you come in while you're bleeding so I can see what happens between your legs when there's ✨blood✨ involved?"

Or staring at the M/F boxes on ANY intake form, trying to decide which one is less humiliating. What kind of comedic relief do I want to be perceived as: a femboy who is uncommitted to the aesthetic, or a comedically masc woman like Doris from Shrek? I can count the number of times I've seen "other" or "intersex" listed as an option on one hand. And I can't describe the relief of being able to check it. It's beyond words, just to be fucking acknowledged — to have any sort of implication that my existence isn't supposed to be something else, and that my natural state is not fucked-up, or a failure.

But why is it okay for a doctor to push gender "correction" onto any intersex person, minors included, then turn around and act like trans healthcare is such a big fucking deal?? It's okay to shove progesterone into my hands despite me NOT FUCKING WANTING IT, but god forbid any transfemme person asks for it. Moreover, god forbid I ask for top surgery. It's fine for them to change my sex on my behalf, so long as fertility is the end goal: but if I want to modify my body on my own terms, then it's, "Are you sure??? Are you SURRRRE about that???"

God I HATE the medical system, I hate the insistence on a false two sex binary, and I hate troglodyte conservatives who harp on about middle school biology because they're mentally stunted and permanently at the age of 12 — when they're the same ones that bullied me in middle school so they should KNOW intersex people exist.

I miss being pre-pubescent, going into the doctor's office and knowing that my pediatrician had my best interest at heart. Even if it was shots, or gross medicine, or whatever, I knew that it was for healing me, and I could at least trust that. Now I go into a doctor's office and it feels like a fucking warzone, fight-or-flight is engaged, and I can't help but question their intent.

But the few moments when I do feel intersex? When I don't feel like a defective perisex person? It's beyond description. Being able to have a box to check off. Seeing descriptions of intersex people in history, and knowing that we used to have a place in society. When shame has been beaten into you, having it removed even for a second is a joy beyond words. 🥲

#はい #彼らは性矯正手術がもたらす問題の数を決して教えてくれません #intersex #半陰陽

[fedpawstered]

cutie patootie little doitsu sleeping in my sketchbook

#可愛い🩷 #再投稿 #ヘタリア

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acceptance

#he is such a tragedy #my wife.. #再投稿 #ローデリヒ・エーデルシュタイン

[fedpawstered]

- Address me “Oni-chan”, then I’ll stop. - What is the stupid system? So childish! APH 1hr drawing challenge Theme: Flick on forehead Characters: Iceland & Norway

#staring blankly into the horizon #yeah #再投稿

[fedpawstered]

🇵🇱 🇰🇷 🇧🇬 🇨🇦

requests for friends and anons (:

#ooh #再投稿

[fedpawstered]

#can’t let gang kno i fuck with castrating him #ギルベルト・バイルシュミット

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i want off tumblr vro yall are scary ngl 🤫

#no joke this fandom is kind of insane #like i am trying to look at cool art on here #not your evil political takes

[fedpawstered]

japan is so silly <3

#they should kiss #ヘタリア

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When the dog bites

#oh my 👁️👁️ #he’s getting touched tonight #ヘタリア #エドァルド・フォンヴォック #再投稿

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ranch isn’t done until I SAYYY it’s done 🙏

#ranchposting

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Guy who never looks the same when I draw him

#oh hell naw his ball 🙁 #ヘタリア #ギルベルト・バイルシュミット #再投稿

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Under the whimsical rain, he is a man of hardship... [Original]

#oh my goodness #gulp #ヘタリア #hetalia germany

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APH Austria

I dunno I wanted to make more transparents of Austria cuz I love him and I found this XD

Art © Hidekaz Himaruya Transparent © heta–transparents

#i hate him #he will he peeled #aph austria

[fedpawstered]

he definitely saw that erotic art

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How do you even lose a whole ass country

[fedpawstered]

They look like 2 parents and Japan is their teenage kid going through a phase 😭☠️

#free him #ヘタリア

[fedpawstered]

dude shut up leave her alone man