fandomfairyuniverse

[fandomfairyuniverse]

After shoving Hansel in the oven, the witch turns to Gretel - who is currently fending the witch off with a gingerbread chair - and says:

“I can’t believe you thought a trail of breadcrumbs would save you. I mean, honestly, this is a forest! It’s full of animals. Honestly, the very idea that a dumb shit like you thought you could get the better of me is absurd.”

Gretel hits her in the face with said chair. To be fair to the witch, she takes the chairshot like a champ.

“Ow!”

“Did you know,” says Gretel, “that crows are capable of facial recognition?”

“Eh?” Says the witch, clambering to her feet and pulling a candy cane sledgehammer off the wall. “What’s that got to do with anything?”

“Not only that,” Gretel continues, “but they can remember both friends and enemies. And they’ll often follow people they remember as friends.”

The two fence with their sugared weapons for a moment, before the witch knocks the chair out of Gretel’s hands.

“Enough with the bird facts! Honestly, this whole attempted escape has been utter clownshoes. Get in the fucking oven!”

She seizes Gretel by the collar. Gretel immediately sandbags, letting her whole body go limp. This eminently practical defense forces the witch to try and deadlift her. Which is hard, as the witch often skips leg day.

“For example,” Gretel says, as the witch struggles and grunts, “if you feed crows a lot of breadcrumbs, they’ll probably start to see you as a friend and follow you in the hope of more food.”

The witch stops. Outside, she hears the thunder of wings.

“They’ll even bring you shiny things they find as presents!” Says Gretel, as a corner of the gingerbread ceiling is suddenly cut away by a large crow with a knife in its mouth.

“Oh shitballs.” Says the witch, as the crows descend. “I hope you know this is a great unkindness.”

“Technically,” Says Gretel, “It’s a murder.”

[fandomfairyuniverse]

"It's not every day that you get to see stars with an alien, right? How can I miss it?" June Wanwimol as LUNA in Episode 8 23.5 (2024)

#she <3 #23.5 degrees

[fandomfairyuniverse]

yawns are contagious

[fandomfairyuniverse]

240331 hongjoong, yunho, yeosang 💛 kcon behind

#pretty boys #ateez

[fandomfairyuniverse]

TOPTEN SUPAKORN as Darin in GODDESS BLESS YOU FROM DEATH (2024)

#yessssss #goddess bless you from death

[fandomfairyuniverse]

Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

[fandomfairyuniverse]

[Official Pilot] Pit Babe The Series Season 2

I miss my X-Hunter babies so much

#they mean so much to me #pit babe

[fandomfairyuniverse]

“Sweet Dreams”

Martin Gregus captured a once in a lifetime moment of a Polar Bear sleeping on a bed of fireweed.

Churchill, Manitoba, Canada

[fandomfairyuniverse]

Changkyun ✷ [I.M BEHIND YOU] ep.15

#hi #he pretty #im changkyun #monsta x

[fandomfairyuniverse]

💙

#oh wow #this is so pretty #hwang hyunjin #stray kids

[fandomfairyuniverse]

SEVENTEEN 'Maestro' Official Teaser 1

#this mv is going to end me #seventeen

[fandomfairyuniverse]

when people are like “the hunger games just stole the plot of battle royale” like listen everything steals from the plot of everything the lion king is just furry hamlet westworld is jurassic park but sexier lost is edgy gilligan’s island there are no original stories and the only good piece of media is jennifer’s body

[fandomfairyuniverse]

Jamie-Lee O'Donnell as Michelle Mallon in Derry Girls (2018—2022)

#an icon #derry girls

[fandomfairyuniverse]

Me meeting a genie: Okay, so my first wish is for 1000 dollars a day, deposited to my bank account without any way of tracing it to anything illegal. I want this money to come from the ten richest people in America (100 dollars each), withdrawn under the guise of nebulous, random purchases and surcharges. It would probably be best to split the money into a myriad of smaller fees, though, to reduce the likelihood of anyone noticing. Got all that?

Genie: um

Me, continuing on without a care: For my SECOND wish, I want you to give me the ability to learn any given phoneme, so that I can learn to pronounce new languages perfectly. If you’re willing, it’d be nice if it were a little easier to memorize new languages too, but if that’s not cool, I’m perfectly fine doing all the legwork myself I mostly just want to be capable of pronouncing things correctly.

Genie, now staring at me like I’m insane: ……okaaayyy?….

Me: For my third wish. I want to always have great ideas for gifts for people. Every birthday, every holiday, I want to be able to come up with something they’d really like, with enough time to actually get it for them.

Genie, just staring at me

Me: I can provide you with a written document if that would help.

[fandomfairyuniverse]

🖤

#soft pretty boy #jeong yunho #ateez

[fandomfairyuniverse]

23point5TH's update with viewjune as aylinluna 👽🌙

bonus:

#awwwww #they’re so cute #view benyapa #june wanwimol

[fandomfairyuniverse]

on this planet full of competitions, there are losers, and winners. it seems impossible for those two paths to cross. doesn't it?

#oh wow #this is incredible #heart that skips a beat