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irl update!!!
TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY IN MONTHS WHERE I WENT WITHOUT A BREAKDOWN LIKE... i've basically just either really, REALLY hated myself to the point of being sick, or felt suicidal, every day at least once, for a few hours
but i've been trying to go at least one day on a normal schedule by myself, keeping myself stable, for one day and
i did it
no crushing depression
no self hatred
no wishing i was dead or thinking people would be better off if i was
like.... this may not last but the fact is I PULLED THIS OFF FOR ONE DAY... IF I CAN DO IT FOR ONE DAY.... I CAN DO IT AGAIN... RIGHT?
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Carnevale di Venezia ► celestial blue
x x x x x x x x
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cut me open
sorry super gory i guess
panty version
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some IRL updates for u guys below the cut because i don't update here much i'm sorry ahhhhh!! ; 0;
my doggy is 6 months old now and also 60 lbs she's huge
i've been on a few dates but he kissed me and i ended it because i wasn't really interested in pursuing it further i decided i didn't feel like being romantic and i certainly didn't want to be physical i think i'm just guna be one of those people who just has really good friends in life and never marries anyone!! i'm content w/ just having friends i love having friends.. and puppies puppies are great too i love doggies
neopets
pokemon also i'm so fuckin excited for the enw game but also i've been playing w2 some more and i'm thinking i'm going to write a really nice fic w/ N and hopefully it'll help me get back into writing again too
i might be getting the flu
my depression/anxiety is still getting worse and stuff and most of the time i just stay up only about 6-8 hours a day but i'm getting better at holding myself together even when i feel my worst? so that's good at least!!!
i've made so many new OCs it hurts because i can't draw any of them
did plan more stuff for til dea out though
and for my novel
neopets
i'm hoping to be able to hold myself together well enough to get a job this summer, and start taking classes again in the fall. so. yup. that's it. those are my life updates!!
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Characters from The Last Story by Kimihiko Fujisaka
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jammin to good mood fast beat super cool musics
pandora decides to play linkin park
#TRIED SO HARD AND GOT SO FAR#BUT IN THE END IT DOESNT EVEN MATTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR#no shut up pandora#ashtalks
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today is one of those wonderful rare days where i'm so pleased w/ how a picture is coming out that i've spent half of my time staring deeply into the character's eyes
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