enlightenedbean

[enlightenedbean]

[enlightenedbean]

So how do u kill your self without actually dying

[enlightenedbean]

to the woman watching the Toxic by Britney Spears music video with no headphones in the psychiatrists waiting room: you’re the only motherfucker in this room who can handle me

[enlightenedbean]

[enlightenedbean]

[enlightenedbean]

ya coochie declined

[enlightenedbean]

Ya know, bisexuality ain’t that hard to understand.

Girls are cute.

Guys are cute.

What more do you want from me?

[enlightenedbean]

men will wear the worst jeans youve ever seen and act like its okay

[enlightenedbean]

i can’t stop thinking about that tweet about the guy who tried to stop his cat from pushing his door open and accidentally trained him to push 50lbs instead

[enlightenedbean]

please put “yeeted the fuck off this mortal coil” on my tombstone

[enlightenedbean]

Gays!! Wake up!!

[enlightenedbean]

me after taking 4 flintstones gummies

[enlightenedbean]

the beef between STEM and arts + humanities is so tired. science and art are the same. sister subjects. they’ve fueled one another for years. one cannot exist without the other. they’re both made of the same kind of wonder, one tries to attain long sought after things in reality, and the other impliments the stuff of dreams. logic and emotionality. they’re both exercises of imagination. it’s all just beautiful, academic sludge.

[enlightenedbean]

[enlightenedbean]

“Years ago a friend of mine had a dream about a strange invention; a staircase you could descend deep underground, in which you heard recordings of all the things anyone had ever said about you, both good and bad. The catch was, you had to pass through all the worst things people had said before you could get to the highest compliments at the very bottom. There is no way I would ever make it more than two and a half steps down such a staircase, but I understand its terrible logic: if we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known.”

— I Know What You Think of Me, Tim Kreider for the New York Times

[enlightenedbean]

My favorite misunderstanding I’ve had to clear up so far was a Japanese person asking me about the word “fuck”. Because apparently someone had told him if he said “fuck” in America that he might be killed on the spot. Which I think is the funniest lie that I’ve ever heard

[enlightenedbean]