elenabradshaw

[elenabradshaw]

i'll be good | self-paragraph

mentions: alex kingsley ( @thealexkingslxy ), bohdi sharma ( @bohdisharma ), jovi levine ( @jovilevine ), zehra aksoy ( @zehraxaksoy ) and sasha kang tw: death, addiction, drug use, gun

i'll be good, i'll be good, and i'll love the world, like i should

things have been turning around for the better for elena as of late, reconnecting with zehra, finally focusing on the love she knew she deserved with bohdi, just…living her life the way she simply wanted. but the happiness along that came with it was instantly taken away from her when the news of sasha’s death was immediately spread throughout the news. she was supposed to talk to her next, like zehra, sasha deserved the truth, why she left them that day, when she’s chosen to take herself out of the whole femme fatale narrative, pretend as if that chapter of her life didn’t exist. for days she stayed in and had been quiet, away from mostly everyone, except bohdi. jovi did come over, but that was it. she’s never dealt with death like this before, with death that wasn’t deserved, sasha didn’t deserve this, nobody did.

for all of the light that i shut out, for all of the innocent things that i doubt, for all of the bruises i've caused in the tears, for all of the things that i've done

and that made elena think about talking to alex, for days, as she was also mourning for someone whom she considered was her sister. alex was different, alex knew her past the walls she put up around most people, she could tell her absolutely anything about everything. in a way, she keeps her feet on the ground and not bury herself with it, she keeps the light alive, brings the sense of adventure out of her, not letting her seclude herself from everything, from the world. that conversation with alex as she was dealing with her withdrawal was elena’s wake up call to take that love she knew she deserved. alex and jovi were her new consistent for the past few years ever since she arrived to hidehill. they didn’t let her put herself away from people, even though there was hesitancy from her at first, she was thankful for them.

for all the sparks that i stomped out, for all of the perfect things that i doubt

she knew she had to talk to alex, especially with how long it has been after what happened at the fourth of july event. as painful and disappointing as it was, alex was still her friend, alex was someone who was around elena as she was just crawling back up to her feet from her lowest. she couldn’t just leave her because of a stumble. she knew alex needed people who wouldn’t give up on her, and she hasn’t given up, she just needed space, as that night reminded her of the first time, she took on a path that messed up her life.

she had been pacing around her apartment for almost the whole day, getting ready as she’s decided to come over alex’s trailer. it had taken her long because she was still figuring out what to say. she was never mad at her in the first place, she was just hurt, but she still loves her best friend, she still cared from a distance, she just needed it. she knew alex had to take the steps on her own accord to turn her own life around, to take that step only motivated by herself. of course, she’s heard things, about the meetings, they go to the same place, she just chooses to be there at a different time. she had to let her know how much she’s proud of her, and maybe celebrate with her for the things she did for herself, not for her, not for jovi, or for anyone else. for herself. elena was so proud.

then there comes a knock.

elena wasn’t really expecting anyone to come over for the day, she made it clear over text to people who had checked up on her the last time they’ve talked, she’s chosen to distance herself from everything and everyone to deal with sasha’s death. it was something she’s still dealing with. today was just an exception, she needed to see alex, before things are too late.

“h—” before elena could even get a word out, everything that comes next from the very second she opens the door becomes a blur. she couldn’t make of whoever it was, as she was just filled with panic and the need to survive. she wiggled her best out of their hold, but it wasn’t enough, all she could is voice out her need for help, but there isn’t a sound coming out from her, falling defenseless, limp while they took over her. elena, once more, tries to figure out who it was after all, but it was an attempt wasted, as she passes out seconds later.

the former singer then wakes up, panic instantly in her eyes whilst she looks around the room, they weren’t there anymore, and the first thing she notices was how her place was…arranged as if nothing has happened, except how she was tied up, facing the door. she tries to let out a scream once more, a desperate scream for help, yet it was muffled by a cloth covering her mouth. though it didn’t take her long to finally see the gun pointed at her, with a thin rope tied to its trigger. she follows its trail, realizing how it is connected to the door. she tries to cry out once more, the very moment she hears a series of footsteps, which aren’t suppressed, with the door slightly open.

then she hears that voice. alex, run. please just run. she couldn’t get the words out, though she still tries, eyes wide as tears continue to stream down her face. she knew she’s got nowhere to go now; she accepts her fate. but she didn’t want alex to get hurt. but the more she cried out, alex made her way in, triggering the contraption, and her life ended just before she could even realize it.

yeah, i'll be good, i'll be good, for all of the times i never could

#death tw #addiction tw #drug use tw #gun tw #elena bradshaw: self para #hidehillplotdrop017

[elenabradshaw]

Austin 📲 Elena

Austin: i know, me too Austin: shit has to start getting better at some point Austin: you'll let me know if you do? Elena: worry about zehra instead, austin Elena: i'm fine, gonna be fine Elena: i just need to be alone right now.

#austinparker #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

Austin 📲 Elena

austin: hey kid.. austin: how are you holding up? anything you need to talk about or go to a certain meeting about? Elena: i wish for it to be fucking over, austin Elena: i'm fine. i don't need to go.

#austinparker #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

ELENA BRADSHAW: INSTAGRAM

ft: sasha kang

#elena bradshaw: socials

[elenabradshaw]

Nathalie Emmanuel by Bartek Szmigulski for Rollacoaster (F/W 2020)

#elena bradshaw: visage

[elenabradshaw]

closed to: zehra aksoy! (@zehraxaksoy ) location: zehra's place

elena hasn't gone out of her place for days ever since the news, still struggling to process the loss of someone she's considered the family she had for almost a decade. she was just patching things up with the people she's left all those years ago, zehra, austin, and she was eventually going to get to sasha, too. but she was too late, she has never been able to tell her the truth as to why she left in the first place, which makes things even harder for her to take in. she had a few people, bohdi and jovi check up on her here and there, but it was something she still found hard to believe as she go through different kinds of emotion, the denial, the anger towards people who never really knew them, never really knew sasha talking about things, hence her snapping momentarily in the forum. it was just now that she found some strength to get up on her feet, and come over to zehra's place. they needed each other more than anything else right now. a few weak knocks on his door as she finds herself staring off into space, trying to find the right words to say as she waits for zehra to open up.

#zehraxaksoy #elena bradshaw: threads

[elenabradshaw]

the second the rest of the buttons of bohdi's shirt were undone, elena's hands immediately explores the newly exposed skin, wanting to just feel the man as close as she possibly could, without absolutely anything that were separating them. there were just times that she just wanted to crawl under his skin if it were possible. he had just brought this wave of calm and of love that the woman has found herself hooked on, a feeling that she really hasn't felt before. she has then found herself tugging on his shirt, wanting for it to be completely off and have his body completely close with hers again. his hands that were now under elena's shirt elicits a moan from her, hips rolling in need whilst he spoke, and she doesn't let him wait. she slightly sits up from the bed, instantly slipping it off and tossing it on the floor before laying back down and pulling him close. "you have me, bohdi..." she murmurs, before pressing her lips on his. "i'm all yours to take."

𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓 for a time that wanting her would be enough. perhaps he believed that he would be offered nothing more than a simple cordial hello, a simple extension of fingers as she brushed by him. but now, his own fingers traced the very constellations that blemishes she had been born with built across her skin -- ones that he had become intimately familiar with as the days pass by. i need you. it's all that she needs to say -- the way her name falls over his lips is just the cherry on top. he doesn't expect her to continue and yet, he's blessed with such sinful words creating such glorious music in his ears. her kiss burns in the most exciting way possible, only pulling away to make quick work of the other two buttons keeping his shirt together. ❝ you don't have to ask me twice, elena.. ❞ he breaths, unable to keep himself from closing the space between the two of them as his hands caress the skin underneath her shirt. he needs it gone -- desperately so. perhaps more so than he's needed anything else, food, water.. he never thought he could crave someone more than any kind of basic human need. again, a testamate to the sheer power she had over him. ❝ lets get these clothes off.. i want to see you. i want to see just how you look, only for me. ❞

#nsfw tw #bohdisharma #elena bradshaw: threads

[elenabradshaw]

elena felt like her world just crumbled upon learning the news that sasha has been murdered, that she has lost grasp of everything. the woman was someone she's spent almost a decade of her life with, the four of them achieve the very goal they've dreamt of together. she was a huge past of elena's past, one she has chosen not to acknowledge before, but was starting to accept as of late. she had been in her place the whole day, wanting to just drown in the silence of everything as it was a war in her head, the former singer going through their pictures as she hears a knock on the door, which snaps her out of the thoughts she was deep in. "jovi, i--" upon instinct, she pulls the redhead into a hug, finally breaking down in tears. "she doesn't--she didn't fucking deserve that, jo..." she murmurs. "why the fuck is it gotta be her...i don't understand..."

@elenabradshaw

LOCATION: elena's apartment

𝐉𝐎𝐕𝐈 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐈𝐍 the hours of the night that she was completely numb, unable to feel a single emotion ever again after learning of sasha's death. the next emotion she had felt was anger -- pure, overwhelming anger. how many people in this town were so fucked up, that they resorted to murder in an attempt to fix themselves ? especially taking sasha from the people who loved her. she was nothing but kind, and brought everyone around her so, so much peace. and now, there was another hole poked in the town. elena had been one of the first person that jovi reached out to after her death was released to the public. it was a blur, her journey between her own home and her best friend's. when the other opened the door, tears started to fill jovi's eyes. ❝ elena.. ❞

#jovilevine #elena bradshaw: threads

[elenabradshaw]

text to 📩 elena bradshaw

jovi: hey you.. jovi: where are you right now? Elena: hey...you don't have to worry about me, jo. Elena: i just need to process everything right now.

#jovilevine #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

text to 📩 elena bradshaw <3

bohdi: you were exactly as you are, elena. that's what you did. bohdi: hey, of course. i'll order some stuff, and we can do whatever feels right. okay? bohdi: i love you [deleted before being sent] bohdi: so what if i get a speeding ticket. i'm cutting my time in half. Elena: please don't leave me. [ unsent ] Elena: you don't have to rush, bohdi. just please...stay safe for me. Elena: i can't lose you too.

#bohdisharma #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

text to 📩 elena bradshaw <3

bohdi: and i want to do this. i want to be there. bohdi: alright, i'll be there in five minutes, and then you and i are gonna go back to the apartments. bohdi: i know, i know. i didn't know her well, but she was always kind to me. bohdi: whatever you need, consider it done. Elena: i really don't know what did to deserve you Elena: i just...i need to be away from everything right now, bohdi, everything doesn't feel real

#bohdisharma #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

text to 📩 elena bradshaw <3

bohdi: we don't have to say a single word. but i'm coming and i'm not going anywhere. bohdi: i'll handle them, okay? bohdi: now. where are you? Elena: bohdi... Elena: i'm at the lounge, out back. i need a smoke Elena: this isn't fucking real. this is all a fucking nightmare, bohdi.

#bohdisharma #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

text to 📩 elena bradshaw <3

bohdi: lena. bohdi: i'm leaving the office right now. bohdi: where are you? bohdi: i'm coming to you. [ SENT A COUPLE MINUTES LATER ] bohdi: don't look at the forum. please. Elena: i'm fine. i just need a second. Elena: bohdi you really don't have to. i need to be alone right now. Elena: i can't just fucking let them say that, bohdi

#bohdisharma #elena bradshaw: sms

[elenabradshaw]

it was those words that elena didn't expect to hear from crue, nor from anyone else. with the deaths that had been haunting them for months, elena or anyone in this town were deprived from something they've deserved to have. the former singer had stayed up some nights reading the news of people who were either friends she's made over the years or someone she had just bumped into a few times found either injured or dead, and it brought strange feelings she couldn't shake off. "crue...you don't have to do such thing for me." elena gives her a soft smile. "you know i'd tell you to prioritize your own safety first over mine, right?"

"I'd keep you safe, you know." Crue spoke softly as they looked over, connecting their eyes together. She really meant it too. She would do anything to make sure nothing happened to Elena, to anyone she really cared about. "Even if I had to risk myself, I'd keep you safe." Her thumb softly rubbing the back of her hand as they continued to lay there together with their fingers intertwined. She had spent so much time admiring the person that was next to her, that she never had the courage to say anything until now. Now that they were alone together on the beach, she could try her best to somehow give her comfort with the town they lived in.

#cruebishop #elena bradshaw: threads

[elenabradshaw]

"you have me, bohdi..." elena pulls away slightly so she could stare deeply into his eyes, making sure that he knows that this isn't going away anytime soon, or ever. that elena is going to say by his side through it all. their relationship was something she hasn't really defined herself yet, but she knew that this is where she's supposed to be, that after all this time of being so lost that she really didn't have that much of direction in her life, that after she'd left the only thing she knew how to do, there was not path for her to go to. but all this time, she had been sharing a path with someone whom she had just referred to as neighbor, a word that didn't carry much meaning, but, for them, it was a little term of endearment over the years of their little banter in the mornings at the hallways, the little smiles and the nods, one inviting the other for whatever reason just to have company...

elena guesses she should really thank that wine for the courage.

"i need you, bohdi..." elena breathes out with not a trace of hesitation as she tilted her head to the side, grabbing and tugging on a handful of his hair as his lips find her neck, a weak spot bohdi has immediately learned from the very first time. elena's legs then were now wrapped around the other, not really wanting any kind of space between their bodies as every kiss he leaves on her skin elicits a moan out of the former singer, subtly rolling her hips against his. "i need you to touch me, everywhere..." her body then shudders under his as she utters those words. elena then tugs on bohdi's hair once more, making him look up at her before she continues to speak. "take me the way you've always wanted to take me."

𝐈𝐓 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 felt like ages since bohdi had experienced something so healthy -- a connection that reminded him of the beauty in the world around him, even with the war that raged outside. despite the chaos they had been experiencing, he made sure to cherish every moment he had with elena, for the woman had an unspoken talent of keeping him sane. not that he would ever want to place such a responsibility on the woman's shoulders -- which is why he kept the words to himself, but he meant every single one of them. hearing her call him baby could have caused his heart to give out right then and there, but he stays strong as he takes in every feature that he has come to know so well. ❝ i know, i know.. if something comes up, of course i will. but right now.. ❞ he responds, an arm coiling around her waist. he used to find himself wondering what he did to deserve her, moments like these. her time, her affections. and yet, as he has them -- all he can hear or think about are how beautiful her voice sounds in his ears, and how desperately he needs her, as if he's a desperate traveler who needs to be led to water. ❝ i just need you. ❞

she doesn't have to ask him twice to focus on her, because it's all he wants to do. and so, he simply nods with a broken breath as he takes her in his arms once more and closes the space between them. he's slowly but surely found himself becoming more familiar with her body in manners that he never thought he ever would -- this night being no different. lips slowly trace a familiar pattern within the crook of her neck. ❝ what do you need, elena ? ❞ he hums, asking the question in a manner that is both genuine and somewhat coy. the otherwise buttoned up bohdi could not have been more undone, shirt unbuttoned except for two clasps clinging to life as it is. lips soon trail across the skin near her collarbone before meeting her gaze once more. ❝ tell me. ❞ he takes advantage of the small space between them to tease, wondering if maybe, just maybe, he would be leaving some kind of expectation for more.

#nsfw ish tw #bohdisharma #elena bradshaw: threads

[elenabradshaw]

Friday's female celebrity of the day is Nathalie Emmanuel. Hey, she's great. This is the twenty second time she's been FCOTD.

#elena bradshaw: visage

[elenabradshaw]

elena turned to look at crue after she says those words, not really expecting to hear it. it was this sense of comfort she's never expected to share with the blonde, feeling as if some weight was now lifted off her shoulders. "i really...truly hope so, crue. i really...don't want to lose anyone." even though part of elena was still scared, she kept her optimism that things are starting to look up for everyone in this town. and as they held hands, elena succumbs to the need of intertwining their fingers, eyes only staying on crue.

Crue watched with longing eyes as Elena laid down next to them. Ever since she could remember the first-time seeing Elena perform on stage, that first time with Sasha, she had always been impressed by the person she was. "You were just the company I was hoping for." They laid back on the sand to join them. "Nothing we have to worry about anymore. Neither of us have to lose anyone again." She reached over, taking the others hand in hers as they both laid side by side covered in the sun.

#cruebishop #elena bradshaw: threads