eldritch-cutiepie

[eldritch-cutiepie]

humans are a subspecies of elf known for dying really quickly and being stressed the whole time

[eldritch-cutiepie]

REMEMEBER IF HARD WATER IS CAUSING CALCIUM BUILDUP IN YOUR BONG, JUST LET SOME WHITE VINEGAR SIT IN THAT THING FOR A FEW MINUTES AND SHE'LL BE LOOKIN BRAND NEW. JUST DONT SMOKE WEED WOTH THE VINEGAR INSIDE PLEASE

[eldritch-cutiepie]

as far as i’m concerned all pussy is clown pussy

[eldritch-cutiepie]

if I had a plasma pistol you wouldn't hear from me ever again. i would crouch behind highway guardrails and shoot fully charged shots at teslas passing by me

[eldritch-cutiepie]

its time for the tantrum hole

[eldritch-cutiepie]

shoutout to the color red

[eldritch-cutiepie]

How are we still having homestuck drama in the year of our lord 2024

[eldritch-cutiepie]

Call me sex negative if it makes you feel better but I just don't see how so many people can fall for such an over engineered explanation like that. Especially when "delivered by a stork" gets you to the exact same end result, and without A LOT of unproven science and mental gymnastics to tie some vaguely connected concepts together.

[eldritch-cutiepie]

When people are talking about Catholicism’s positive contributions to human culture they’re referring to BDSM

[eldritch-cutiepie]

the doctor just walks around like i’m a slut….i’m a war criminal….i’m so sad…..i put on funny outfits……

[eldritch-cutiepie]

Do you kids know how hard it is to hyper fixate on shit as a goddamn adult?? Sorry boss I know you need those files done but I’m too busy giggling like a goddamn school girl over a fictional man

[eldritch-cutiepie]

Alleged Wizard Steel Hater*

Just got called a “Henry Hopclap truther” (correct) by a proud “Wizard Steel Hater” (my wife)

[eldritch-cutiepie]

pokemon single moms will raise their child in a quaint neighborhood of three houses and one of the nations leading laboratories

[eldritch-cutiepie]

Any of my followers extradimensional? Can u help this guy out? He's not even supposed to be here.

[eldritch-cutiepie]

his pussy was like a Whataburger frier. and brother. i was the last rat in texas

[eldritch-cutiepie]

[eldritch-cutiepie]

do you think a dude ever had sex with another guy