eggworld7

[eggworld7]

#waiting for the doors to open #magic keys

[eggworld7]

Part 1: Finding The Magic Shop

Two more years. I have two more years until I graduate, until I’m finally free from the stress and weight of academia. At the age of 20, I really expected to have my life together, 15 year old me would be laughing if she saw me. You know those assignments that teachers in high school ask you to write? The ones that ask “where do you see yourself in 5 years?”. Well, I couldn’t have been more wrong. 

Like most 20 year olds, I was in the midst of finishing the typical academic career. Not quite sure what I plan to do with my life, unsure of my dreams and interests. It seemed as if all my friends were on their paths, and whenever I asked “how did you find you passion?”, I got the same answer, “you just have to know”.  As someone who suffers greatly from overthinking, I am constantly worrying about my future. Honesty, I’m scared. What if I never find something that excites me? Or what if the job I get makes me hate my life? These questions circle my mind daily, and mom and dad have difficulty with helping me answer these questions. I figure that things will work themselves out but I can’t help but overthink. The last time I felt at peace with myself and my position in life was probably as a toddler in an imaginary world. 

With the sun shining onto my head, it felt as if my brain was on fire. I sat by the window, letting the sun burn into me, senseless as I had no more energy. Quickly, I felt as if I was running out of time. It honestly seemed better to let myself be burned into oblivion rather than let myself burnout from school. Maybe I should go for a walk… 

Fueled by the feeling of failure and uncertainty, I stepped into the scorching sun and started walking. With no destination, I walked for what felt like forever, until I came across an unfamiliar store. Coated in navy blue pain and dotted with small stars, the stores stood out from the rest of the neighborhood’s ambiance. My curiosity was piqued. Without looking back, I stepped into the dimly lit stores and gazed at the sight before me. What I saw was literally out of this world. Surrounding me were shelves upon shelves of jars that contained colorful keys. On the ceiling were videos of stars and planets, it seemed like I was in the center of the universe. Happiness washed over me as I felt the stress and fear of life become minuscule, overtaken but the greatness of the galaxy. Behind the counter stood a man, six foot five tall, and he resembled a fantastical character. He was beautiful and young, with strong, sharp features. Unable to process the sight before me, I stood staring, with my mouth opened wide. The man swiftly moved from behind the counter and approached me. He reached his slender hand out and softly closed my mouth. He backed up and took a breath and shouted, “WELCOME TO THE MAGIC SHOP”.

#welcome to the magic shop #waiting for the doors to open

[eggworld7]

Part 2: Using my keys

It had been a while since I felt an excitement such as this.

”With his shout, the jars were brought to life, hopping around and creating a jingle. As they danced around, the man joined in. The atmosphere nearly made me dance, but the stress of school weighed me down, keeping my feet weighed down. The man turned to me, still moving with the rhythm, and grabbed my hand. Swaying just my arms, I began to feel a jolt of electricity and saw my feet begin to move. Soon enough, I was smiling and grooving, something that seemed so foreign to me came so naturally. I realized that I loved this feeling, and I wanted it to last, but with one last hop, the music died down. “Welcome to the magic shop! The place that exchanges your worries and fears for happiness” the man announced. “Simply put, these keys on the wall are keys to doors that will lead you forward, into the right direction”. I looked to the very back of the room and noticed a dim light that slowly changed colours. Pink, yellow, orange, purple, became hypnotizing. The man reached his hand out. “Follow me”

Following the strobing lights, we walked to the back of the room, where hundreds of doors of varying sizes and colours were lined up.

“Now we just need to wait for the door to open, and it will do so if it seems like you are ready for change” the man said. 

I was ready to do anything to rid myself of the feeling of self-hate, and return to a few minutes ago when I was happy just dancing with a stranger. One door closer to happiness, I stepped through the yellow door, into darkness, and after a few seconds I ended up at the storefront. I peered back into the shop but saw nothing but. Wondering if I was all just in my head, I decided to return home, all out of hope.

I crossed the street and as I turned the corner, an acquaintance from school appeared. Shyly I wave and continue with my head down when suddenly a hand grabs me. “I’m headed to the library to study, care to join?” she asks. I’m not one for being spontaneous but for some reason I nodded and followed. As we walked, she talked as I kept quiet, still thinking about the magic shop. We came across a bike rental store and I was suddenly dragged in. “ohmygosh we have to!! The sun is setting!” she squealed. With a smile we hopped on a bike and waved to the owner, indicating that we would return. With that, we cruised down the street towards the beach while listening to music and laughing. As the sun began setting, we talked about school. It turns out that I’m not the only one overthinking and unsure of my path. A wave of relief washed over me the longer we talked and soon we returned to the bike store and parted ways. I was so happy that I had found someone like me. 

The next day I returned to the magic shop. Where the second door managed to help me once again. It was amazing.

#keys #jars #happy #doors

[eggworld7]

#happy #relaxed #part 2

[eggworld7]

https://open.spotify.com/track/3YJJjQPAbDT7mGpX3WtQ9A?si=75fb843487254baa <- perfect song for this picture

#how im feeling #part 3

[eggworld7]

Part 3: Found

I’m happy now.

Rather than my life being better due to physical things, I realize that I just need to have the right mentality. I have finally found my path, I just needed to wait for the right doors to open. The doors to happiness and self-love. After my first visit to the magic shop, I did not believe what the man told me, “be patient and wait for the right door to open because once you do, you will find the missing pieces of your life”. But after my first entrance, my life actually changed. Pieces of my life started coming together and making sense in a way that I developed a better relationship with myself. Crazy right? 

On days where I hated being me and just wanted to disappear, I would visit the magic shop, and by entering through the door, I would find all my answers. I learned that you just need to wait for the doors to open, you don’t need to bust them down. Like they say, “good things come to those who wait”. I waited for the magic shop to find me, for the keys to be given to me, and for the doors to my new identity to open. 

Today was another hot day. As I gazed out the window and decided to go for a walk. It felt like deja vu, the sun scorching my skin as I took a few steps out the door. Without hesitation, my feet led me down the road and I got an odd feeling in my stomach. I thought to myself, “I am happy. I can’t forget that”, as I continued to be lead down the road. As I approached the familiar navy blue store my stomach stirred. I gulped and took a brave step through the door, still in awe of the interior. The man approached me with a grin. “What brings you back?” he asks. I try to explain the way my feet carried me here and the strange stomach feelings taunting me, but without luck I just babbled. He laughed out loud as I stood there flustered. “Are you happy?” he asks. Without hesitation I answer “yes!” as he walks back behind the counter. He reaches up on his tippy toes, and grabs a jar on the top shelf and hands me the key from inside. “But I’m happy…. I don’t need any more keys” I say. “There are always moments where you need my key. Save it” he replies. With that he pushes me towards the exit and salutes me. “I’ll see you in the future!” he waves and smiles, leaving me with questions.

With a key in hand, I looked ahead at the vacant street. I have finally found peace with who I am and what I’m doing, so I guess the last thing for me to do is to wait for the last door to call for me when the time is right.