dusk-dawn-longposts

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Happy Solstice! Merry Yule!

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Blessed Yule and Happy Holidays to all those this season!

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

⬛️ 🕯 Watch the music video "Necromancer and His Murdered Son”. It tells the story of what happened during the magic ritual performed by a necromancer right after his son was brutally murdered. Find out what he experienced and discover what was revealed to him on that tragic night in his desperate attempt to resurrect him.

✸ The video could be described as tragic, dramatic, surreal, symbolic, expressionist, and it’s fully charged with ritual and subconscious bodily expression, raw emotions and cathartic force.

✸ The track could be labeled as “dark ambient music” and is also available on YouTube Music, Apple Music, Amazon, Spotify and many other music stores and platforms like FB or Instagram.

🛑 Please refrain from watching this video if you suffer from epilepsy or if you consider yourself as someone who could experience seizures when exposed to certain light patterns or images. Viewer discretion is advised.

TYVM All links in Bio ➝ @ofb1t Link of the Youtube video ➝ https://youtu.be/crCmN95YB8o

⬛️ 🕯

#darkambient #ambientmusic #ritual #surreal #underworld #electronicmusic #darkwave #drama #dark #darkmusic #darkart #witchhouse #witch #butoh #downtempo #classicalmusic #goth #gothic #cybergoth #surrealism #necromancer #theatre #contemporarydance #occult #glitch #glitchart #death #fantasy #dreams #ofb1t

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Pet the baby

(via)

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

my pain and suffering is medicalized & privatized, but apparently so is everybody else's

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

autism according to Lacanian psychoanalysis, which i'd say is incomplete so i added stuff (see comment above #/tags):

I'm diagnosed with Level 2 autism. My best friend at one point in my life was paranoid schizophrenic, and I've only experienced psychosis under intense prolonged masking (months of masking at a time).

I also don't suppress social ambiguity very well in language. When I say something to someone else, i register its ambiguity as i say it, that's why i add many caveats when i feel comfortable with someone, or I stop talking and feel kinda distractible. I don't feel "invested" in verbally eliminating ambiguity, unless i know the other person just doesn't like it, no matter how many times I've gotten pushback from other ppl regarding my caveats.

I think the reason why ppl see autistic ppl as quasi‐psychotic is bc many of us cope with neuro‐typological differences (being surrounded by undersupportive allistic/non‐autistic ppl) by going catatonic, either hyperkinetically—agitation, overload—or akinetically—shutdown. But i assume non-autistic ppl would also shutdown if forced to appear autistic.

Another reason for the "psychotic" label is that the autistic children who require more support also need that support (and their support needs are recognized more clearly by non‐autistic ppl) more acutely bc they have co‐occuring intellectual disability, which isn't the same thing as autism.

Allism (which shouldn't be forgotten as a category just bc it's "normative"/majority), autism, neuroticism, psychosis, perversion, are probably "separate" spectrums that overlap depending on neurology and personality. I'm assuming that there's just a bigger gap between a "very autistic" (Level 2) and a normatively allistic person due to how institutions have only been built for the latter, while only asylums and restraints have been built for autistic ppl who aren't at Level 1 (adjacent to allistic ppl). That might actually have to do with how Level 1 has been mainstreamed and accommodated, but also might have to do with them being less autistic and thus easier for restrictive institutions to make room for Level 1, however limited, and if course even more limited by discrimination based on race, gender, etc...

That catatonic stuff doesn't happen to me very often when I'm around ppl who understand me. And if i go beyond autistic catatonia & into more schizophreniform psychosis, it's brief, it goes away easily (eases off into catatonia) as soon as i stop masking, and that level of psychosis actually makes it *easier* (emotionally) for me to mask bc I'm too psychotic to really process the distress consciously. So psychosis for me is kind of... against my autistic traits. Maybe some autistic ppl are also schizophrenic & would therefore have a different relationship with psychosis—one where their psychosis amplifies rather than negates their autistic processing.

If i force myself to appear or speak less autistically/more allistically, it can only be accomplished through cognitive shutdown or a kind of negative, simple psychosis if I try to persist through a shutdown.

Allism/non‐autism, as a mask, is psychoticizing to me. I'm assuming that non‐autistic ppl would also be psychoticized if they were forced to appear autistically.

I don't foreclose "the name of the father". I have the same limits of "other" (I need help understanding non‐autistic others, the same way, well reverse way, that allistic ppl need help understanding ppl like me as a Big Other).

Lacan could just be labeling the ALLISTIC sense of big/general other/non‐self as "Big" bc he's not autistic and is essentializing the allistic general sense of otherness as the natural mode for our whole species when that's just not true. Allistic bias.

I relate more to the big "m/Other" of Ettinger (transsubjective "presentifiers", instead of the classical Big Other), but i can kind of code‐switch to approximate the allistic relationship to "Big Other" if im around enough friendly allistic ppl. Just like non‐autistic ppl have learned to understand my "m/Other" presentification of ambiguity when they care to get to know me. I've also met autistic ppl who seem very comfortable with a stereotypically masculine sense of autonomy, so they seem to have that "f/Ather"/Other master signifier just fine, so this whole m/Other thing could just be due to my personality type (psychological) rather than my neuro-type.

It's just a different relationship to otherness. Autistic otherness i guess.

I had to learn to put this stuff into words due to being online, but a lot of this can be communicated through riffing with other ppl.

Maybe for autistic ppl, any non‐autistic otherness has to be synthetic but our understanding of a Big Other is just an autistic other. And allistic ppl's "Big Other" is also limited to an allistic other, and their synthetic other is autistic. It's not that one neurotype, allism, has full access to something "Bigger" than autistic ppl have access to.

I'm diagnosed with "Level 2" which isn't "high functioning", and I'm hyperverbal when i feel comfortable and was selectively mute in elementary school.

I've talked to nonspeaking autistic adults through text, and met Level 3'ers (profound autism) and Level 1'ers (slight autism, closer to allistic ppl) too.

We process language similarly. Selective mutism ("poverty of speech" sometimes) when we don't think anyone around us will accept our speech, and we can usually tell when non‐autistic/allistic ppl will "micro‐reject" our un‐masked communication, even if we don't know our own neuro‐type (or theirs). Just like non‐autistic ppl can tell when someone is neurodiverse even if they don't even know, in language, what that means for the autistic person they're communicating with, autistic ppl can tell when we've encountered a linguistic or body‐language barrier bc of neurotype difference.

#autism #neurodiversesquad #neurodivergent #autistic #audhd #actually autistic #Youtube

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

a bnuy witch

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Joseph Essig（American, b.1952）

via    more

#felt safe in empty city streets #before i knew better #maybe just in pictures now

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

i've stopped cross-posting but you can still search "instagram" here for my link after it gets inevitably buried

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

i'll see you That, and raise you This: gas pump televisions with the mute option disabled

Billboards on the roads. Product jingles on the radio. Sponsors and ads in the middle of basically every podcast and video. Unskippable previews at the start of physical media. Ads plastered all over any website you visit. Cookies being mandatory to use the modern internet. Scrolling past a dozen ads just to get to the recipe you looked up. Presorted junk mail sent to you ad nauseam. Subscription selling on packaging tape and cardboard boxes. Spam callers. Video game sale. Limited time deal. Buy it now! Hurry in! Impress your friends! Show your loved ones you appreciate them by spending all your money on them! Fill the seething void of having to hear ads every fucking waking moment of your life by spending money! Buy our product! Buy this drink! Be healthy! Get this amazing body! Get this great look! Impress everyone with the things you own! Come home after your grueling job to watch television that's interrupted every 10 minutes by 5 minutes of ads! Airplanes with banners and drones filling the night sky telling you to go here and buy this! Company names lining the boards of every sporting event! Brand logos on most clothing that turn its wearer into an unpaid advertiser! Fuck capitalism! Fuck this constant fucking bombardment of ads telling you if you just buy this one thing then you'll finally be happy!

#murder thoughts #unblockables #dick moves

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Thurs, Fri or Sat? . , . . CHVRCHES UVERworld,　Ella Mai,　 Lil Uzi Vert dj TAKA,　 The Mars Volta,　 My Chemical Romance,　 Cherrie Nas,　 Sota Fujimori,　 Slipknot,　 Reik The Cure The Birthday Massacre,　 Aaliyah,　 Grimes Angel Haze,　 Kanako Itou,　 Circa Survive,　 Common Gabrielle Aplin,　 Fefe Dobson,　 VNV Nation,　 The Used Studio Killers KANA-BOON,　 Paramore,　 Lauryn Hill Ryu☆,　 cupcakKe,　 BIGBANG,　 Molly Sandén BeForU,　 Nicki Minaj,　 DJ Sharpnel,　 GACKT . . , . , . , .. #instafesta #instafest https://www.instagram.com/p/ClkVtINO-4j/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#instafesta #instafest

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Emo rainbow: —• You've seen at least one emo or scene person wear or dye their hair at least one of these colors when they're not wearing all black: Crimson, vermillion (A K A Chinese red, or cinnabar), goldenrod, aquamarine (A K A Brilliant green), indigo, wisteria, and some hue of amaranth. . , . #emo #emoAesthetic #emoHair #emoRevival #emoRenaissance . https://www.instagram.com/p/CjejIOyO5nJ/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#emo #emoaesthetic #emohair #emorevival #emorenaissance

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Credit to @/means _ tv https://www.instagram.com/p/CPHVmY4rvFf/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

✊✊✊ Tweet reads: "Capitalists have created a system in which socialist dissidents cannot live their values. Then, they shame us for "refusing to walk the walk." Stop confusing capitalist hegemony with socialist hypocrisy." —Twitter user: The Millennial Snowflake @/Teh_Snowflake . . . #socialism #capitalismkills #capitalism #capitalist #hegemony . . https://www.instagram.com/p/CPdjE18lsqP/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#socialism #capitalismkills #capitalism #capitalist #hegemony

[dusk-dawn-longposts]

Credit to @Existential_Comic & @DemocracyAtWrk Capitalism began in England around the 16th century. They immediately went on to colonize half the planet in search of new markets, committed multiple genocides, traded slaves, and engaged in constant war. In school we learn about how communism is evil because of a famine. . . . . #capitalism #socialism #communism #communist #commies #socialist #capitalist #propaganda #LeftTwitter #leftisbest . . https://www.instagram.com/p/CPm29HMF4N_/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#capitalism #socialism #communism #communist #commies #socialist #capitalist #propaganda #lefttwitter #leftisbest