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drkungfus-customs · 5 years
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Mtg Custom Card Competition Round 2: Phyrexians on Ixalan
Hello everyone and welcome back to the second week of I and Alyssa's custom card challenge. Just a quick foreword to thank everyone for the warm response we have had to the last round of judging, it is always nice to see people throw feedback back at us for running it. This weeks prompt was provided by Alyssa where participants were asked to present a theoretical Phyrexian corruption of Ixalan. As always submissions were gathered through discord and were judged by myself and Alyssa.
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Michael says: So our first submission of the prompt, this card is a powerful reanimation and board control effect stapled onto a phyrexian corrupted dinosaur. However the power level, especially for a rare, is what has me most concerned. The colour pie is fine and the card feels very black, there are no problems in that regard. The part that has me worried is that the reanimation is instant, comes at a low cost, and is a replacement effect. Once Corruptosaurus is on the battlefield, and if itself gets a -1/-1 counter, it becomes almost impossible to deal with as traditional measures such as rest in piece or leyline will do nothing to prevent this effect. Additionally because the return is instantly rather than at the end of turn as with Marchesa, the Black Rose it opens the card up to some silly loops with persist cards or anything that has -1/-1 counters built in.  While the card is slow to distribute -1/-1 counters, their existence on this card implies they exist elsewhere in the set which will make this card much stronger. Especially in limited this card would be a nightmare as -1/-1 effects your opponent controls will be useless against your creatures and your own also feature as a steal effect. In order to make this card feel a little less broken and more fair I would restrict the resurrection to either only your own creatures or only your opponents. The potential value engine of this card seems a little above the curve as-is, especially when considering older formats with access to things like black sun’s zenith. There isn’t a single factor that pushes this card over, its just a confluence of factors that would make this card just not fun to play with and too warping in the limited environment.
Alyssa says: Formatting is mostly fine. The third ability shouldn’t be a replacement effect, because as written it inappropriately uses “return”. (Because the word return requires a card to be in the graveyard, and this replacement effect means that you gain control of the creature instead of it dying, it never enters a zone it can “return” from.) As written now, it resurrects friendly things with -1/-1 counter on them, meaning anything that has a -1/-1 counter either endemic to it (Bloodied Ghost, Grief Tyrant) or has permanent persist can be infinitely looped by it. You’ve accidentally prevented some abuse like Disciple of the Vault and Blood Artist by replacing the death trigger, but you can still benefit immensely from the infinite sacrifice. Furthermore, it just makes immortal creatures.
Balance-wise, it’s doing a bit much. The endemic wither is fine, giving it a way to damage stuff and get it back, and it would tie well in with the third ability like a souped up Necroskitter. The second ability is completely unnecessary, though perhaps more novel. You really only need one of these for the card to be useful for Limited and narrow Constructed applications (which is where this thing feels like it belongs.) It would be so much better if you went with only one of these abilities: I prefer the second one, as the incremental infection-based effect, perhaps through infected bites or claw injuries, seems much more “dinosaur” than a resurrection effect.
Flavor-wise, it’s okay, but it’s a bit bland. It’s a zombie dinosaur that does vague infection stuff. There’s not much of a story to the card, and a bit of flavor text with the space freed up from the above changes would be just dandy. I want to see how it fits in with the set around it, how Ixalan responds to its new apex predators. You have no art credit. We wouldn’t have noticed that “Mr. J” wasn’t an art credit if someone else didn’t use that art and credit it correctly.
Possible improvements:
-          Focus on one of the two passives and cut the other. If you wanted to focus on the incremental blight aspect, then perhaps make it asymmetric and only affect your opponent’s creatures.
-          Fix that malfunctioning third ability if you decide to stick with it.
-          Flavor text never hurts.
-          Drop a reminder text bubble on Wither for easier reading comprehension.
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 3/5
Flavor – 2/5
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Michael says: This card appears to have a serious flavour issue which really hurts the mechanical execution of the card. The flavour text indicates a phyrexian merger of Ghalta and Etali, something I would expect to have a similar importance as Brisela from Eldritch Moon, however the rest of the card appears to instead by an Ixalani call-back to Phyrexian Obliterator. This card feels like two excellent ideas combined to a less effective whole.
Judging by the perspective of an Obliterator call-back this card feels like a very good way to make a dinosaur version of the card, using enrage as an in theme way of simulating the desired effect. However in this case the card doesn't feel very green at all, outside of the dinosaur tribe and enrage there is nothing mechanical to make this card green. Given the enrage effect is symmetrical and only sacrifices a single land, if you had to keep the green in the mana cost rather than making it BBBB you could probably improve its power and toughness. Additionally if we assume this card is representative of the rest of the set, it is important to note that Wither and Enrage really do not play well in the same environment as wither -1/-1 counters will not trigger any enrage abilities on blocking. I personally would look to replacing wither with another ability, preferably one that is more green to help reinforce the colour requirements.
Again the card isn't particularly bad by any means, but the foremost improvement I would make is replacing the flavour text. The combination of Ghalta and Etali shouldn't be as small as a 5/5, should certainly be a legendary, and should at least cost red. The dissonance of these two ideas harms the card severely.
Alyssa says: Wither shouldn’t be capitalized. In a list of keywords, only the first one is capitalized. When you’re writing quotes in flavor text, make sure you put a shift line break in between the end of the quote and the beginning of the speaker’s name. The card feels barely green at all: in fact, I wouldn’t be surprised to see this as red/black. The only bit that really strikes me as possibly green is the trample, which is secondary in black anyway. Enrage is also really hard to trigger intentionally in black, making abuse of the ability in its two intended colors very difficult.
The enrage ability is beyond busted. I understand you want to reference Phyrexian Obliterator and its extremely powerful on-damage ability, but remember that ability can only be as strong as it is because there’s very few ways for you to abuse it, since the controller of the source sacrifices the permanents. There’s tons of enrage enablers that would allow you to use this to repeatedly Armageddon the board. You may think its symmetry compensates for it, making it a “risk vs reward” play, but if you’re building around it the play will never be symmetrical. If you have one of the many ways to reliably damage this each turn you can just pop every land your opponents play consistently, and you’ll have a giant 5/5 that can wear down literally anything over time provided it doesn’t die. There’s a reason people play Armageddon despite the “this includes your lands” line, and making a repeatable version on top of a strong creature isn’t a good combo.
But it’s the flavor which really grinds my gears. The implication is that the Obliterator is some kind of Brisela-like chimera of Etali and Ghalta… which completely doesn’t gel with the card itself. It’s not legendary, it’s less than half the size of Ghalta, it has none of Etali’s lightning stuff or draw power going on. It looks like a generic compleated dinosaur, which would honestly be completely fine if it weren’t for that flavor text implying this was an amalgam of two of Ixalan’s Elder Dinosaurs. It would be similar to Brisela being, like, a 3/3 Eldrazi with a card draw ability.
Possible improvements:
-          You need to find a way to make it green. Perhaps play on the legendary Phyrexian resilience and have it punish by getting bigger when it takes damage. Or perhaps have it dredge its way out of the graveyard at end of turn if it would die from combat damage. Who knows?
-          Figure out a new enrage ability. This one is ridiculously easy to turn into Armageddons For Ever.
-          Use some new flavor text. If you’re dropping story characters, then you need to reflect their abilities, roles, and legendary status.
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 2/5
Flavor – 1/5
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Michael says: A compleated Azor is a very interesting concept from a lore perspective, and his card would surely excite players to see printed. This card however I am not sure would accomplish this feat. His mana cost is highly colour intensive meaning he is very difficult to cast in any normal game, therefore I would expect to see a reward equivalent to the effort I put in to cast him. In addition to possessing no built in way to protect himself, his effect feels incredibly weak. While seeing your opponents hand is noteworthy, in the vast majority of games when you cast Azor you are likely to be in the later stages of the game. At this point your opponent has likely already cast most of their hand and if not you are playing against control in which case Azor is never resolving let alone actually attacking. And even if the effect does trigger you are only likely to draw a single card at most given the opponent will play around the effect as much as possible. In order to make this card playable its effect needs to be tuned into a specific niche; given Azor's previous identity as a control piece I would want to see an effect that works well against control to help tie the flavour into the mechanics. I and Alyssa came up with giving him "this card cannot be countered" to help give him an anti-control niche along with changing his effect to be an enter the battlefield trigger. Allowing you to look at an opponents hand, pick a card type, and producing a static draw effect whenever your opponent casts one similar to how Archon of Dawn's Reach is worded we believe would be the best way to give him a specific use worth the extreme mana investment to cast him as well as being more relevant in multiplayer.
Alyssa says: Some small formatting changes. It’s “…look at defending player’s…” rather than “the defending player’s”. You need to add a “Then” before “Choose a nonland card type” to help sequence the effect (basically, so you know you look, then declare.) Make sure you install the M15 Mainframe layout for MSE, so you get the M15 card style, holofoil stamp, legendary crown, flavor bar and text chopping.
Woah, that’s a restrictive mana cost! This gent would be underpowered at 3WUB, so making him six mana of specific colors is a bit too much. I get that it’s acknowledging Azor’s original 2WWUU, but he had two strong abilities, one with instant payoff, that necessitated four color pips. This card doesn’t, and should be priced accordingly. I doubt you’ll ever get value off of his ability. He needs to survive a turn to use it, and by that time you not only have to attack an opponent with a brimming hand, but choose a card type they’ll play loads of. It also only triggers from that player casting that card type, so if Jimmy jams all the enchantments that you just disincentivized Bimmy from playing you dont get any cards. Even so, he doesn’t stop your opponents from comboing off, and the fact it isn’t a “may” means in fringe cases he might mill you out. You might get, like, one card off this guy every two turns, and that’s far too weak. Just play Cloudblazer. This ability isn’t black at all. Becoming Phyrexian doesn’t just jack black onto your mana cost, as New Phyrexia demonstrated, and his vague lockdown/card advantage ability doesn’t do much.
Flavor-wise, I’m not sure what Azor is doing here. He’s evidently compleated, and is doing vague law things, but I just don’t see what the ability is meant to indicate. Does he demand tribute from those who would transgress his twisted law? It just doesn’t have an immediate, strong flavor resonance for me. There is also an Incorrect art credit, which also is already in use. This is the art for Sphinx of the Steel Wind, by Kev Walker, from Alara Reborn. (It’s also one of the five first Mythic Rares! The more you know.)
Possible improvements:
-          Make him 3WUB. Or just make him 4WU. He isn’t strong enough to need all of that color.
-          He needs protection, or a stronger ability to justify the risk. Perhaps make his ability also trigger off entering the battlefield, a la Arashin Foremost. You could also retool it into an effect that names a card type that can’t be played, a la Archon of Valor’s Reach. If you make it stronger, tick up the mana accordingly.
-          Make him scale to multiplayer scenarios.
Grades:
Formatting – 3/5
Function – 2/5
Flavor – 2/5
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Michael says: Ok so I really enjoy this card. Its a silly win the game condition with a really crazy activator. These sorts of cards are almost always popular and incentivize weird brews in both the standard environment and in eternal formats. Also I do appreciate the effort you put in to photoshop this yourself, good job on that front. While there is nothing wrong this card in its present incarnation, I think it needs to be improved from where it is now. Phyrexia in general often has an identity of using -1/-1 counters, and so if those exist in the environment it will stop a significant +1/+1 counters theme from being present which would be a key tool making this card workable. In addition while the precedent for win the game effects has been established for the upkeep step this particular card would struggle significantly with such a timing window, as many cards that buff or double power last until end step. If we assume this set cannot use +1/+1 counters the main pathway for this card would be effects that double in power, and therefore I think you can change this effect to an end of turn trigger without much concern over power. If you have a creature with power 40 or greater you are probably winning anyway. In order to avoid confusion with the cleanup step and to improve flavour I would suggest an end of turn trigger where if you attacked with a creature with 40 or more power you win the game.
Alyssa says: You need a comma between “more power” and “you win the game” as they’re two separate clauses. You spelt “versus” wrong, and you want to add a shift line break after the quote finishes before the speaker’s name. Make sure to get the M15 Mainframe card style to add a flavor bar.
Funky, fresh, and Green! The problem is that it’s way too hard to pull off. Placing the win trigger at the beginning of the turn means you need a creature with static power 40 or more, plus instant boosts/abilities, which is really hard because it and the creature both need to survive a full turn to trigger outside of some abstruse circumstances. This just feels like it’s been made too safe out of power level concerns.
I appreciate the need for some counterplay in win conditions, but I feel it’s pretty telegraphed anyway, and if you’re getting the beefy boy that you need to win with this there’s some other enchantments for similar cost that will make your beater so ferocious it’ll probably just win you the game anyway. I feel that it’s perfectly fine to make it an end of turn effect. One variant that we like is for you to attack with a creature with 40 or more power to win the game on the end step, really playing up the flavor of the card.
That flavor is really nice, and I appreciate the photoshop. It’s really cute! I would really prefer to have the artists who made the art you’ve edited credited too (the people who painted Ghalta and Vorinclex.)
Possible improvements:
-          Make it an end of turn effect to better synergise with creature buffs.
-          If you want to keep it at upkeep, add an activated ability that boosts power or whatever. It’s hard to use counters in a Phyrexian set (which is going to be a -1/-1 counter set nearly all the time) but temporary boosts still work.
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 4/5
Flavor – 4/5
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Michael says: This card I find somewhat disappointing in all honesty. To give credit where it is due the templating is correct, I love the flavour text, and the card works. But it is far too safe, and that safety really hurt the card. This is obviously a call-back to the original Mavren effect, but creating 2/2 horrors with deathtouch instead. This really does impact the card in a few ways. Firstly the tokens you make are not vampires, one of the benefits of the original Mavren is that he did not need to attack, and the tokens he made would fuel his ability further so you could always swing in with a single vampire every turn and remain even on tokens. This Mavren requires a significant amount of other vampires in the deck, or to swing with himself which opens up a lot more vulnerability to the card getting blocked and killed. And this plays into my other concern as well as the creatures have deathtouch instead of lifelink. While a more powerful mechanic it promotes a slower and more defensive playstyle, which conflicts with the precedent of the vampires being the white weenie deck, in addition to meaning that if Mavren does swing it is more likely there will be creatures available to block him. Finally and this is the most important concern, he is a white card that creates deathtouch tokens. Yes he is tied to vampires, a tribe mostly in black, but he needs to have black in the mana cost or otherwise this card is a colour pie break.  
Alyssa says: The formatting is just dandy. The full art is nice, but it does reveal the Legend of the Cryptids watermark and copyright information below, which really takes you out of the card. You also spelled Mavren Fein wrong! It’s a small quibble but it really, really hurts the card’s aesthetics and is something that could be easily fixed with some proofreading. Unless compleation made him shuffle his name around a bit.
This card puzzles me. For one, it’s not remotely white: Mavren Fein does produce tokens but they’re white tokens with lifelink rather than black ones with deathtouch. I don’t like the fact that mono-W can break the color pie and make deathtouch creatures relatively easily with him. For another, unlike Mavren Fein’s initial form which produces aggressive tokens with a keyword that incentivizes combat and attacking each turn, Mavren Fien’s ability produces defensive tokens instead. I’m therefore confused as to what exactly his game plan is: attack in every turn, or hunker down? There’s also balance considerations in that he does make 2/2’s, which is fine perhaps on a multicolored card but a bit much for a monocolored one, especially when it’s a color bend like this.
I also don’t like that it lets token vampires make tokens. Small thing, but the Torrezon vampires traditionally make lots of tokens so I worry that might kick it over. The flavor is fun, if a little lazy. It’s literally just Mavren Fein again, but with a slight change in some knobs. I want to see something a little more exciting.
Possible improvements:
-          Proofread! So close to being perfect.
-          He’d be perfect if he just cost WB. No color breaks there, and a neat compensation for being two colors.
-          Is deathtouch really the best keyword for his token? Possibly look to making the tokens more directly incentivize aggression
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 3/5
Flavor – 3/5
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Michael says: Another odd infect card, this time a compleated siren with the ability to steal creatures. Firstly I really, really love that flavour text. Definitely one of the best I've seen in a while from a personal perspective, it resonates just right. My opinion on the mechanics however is that this card is pulling in two directions. Its raid effect wants it to sit back and block attacking creatures to distribute -1/-1 counters, and this would inevitably be very powerful in limited. However on Ixalan I expect to see bigger creatures than normal thanks to all the dinosaurs, which means it can be very difficult at times to block with this creature. The card really wants to both attack to activate the raid safely as well as remain untapped to block incoming attacks. While this dissonance helps to balance what can be a very potent steal effect, it would also make the card very unfun to play as you cant play in the way this card wants to. Yes a board presence and other infect creatures help to mitigate this, but by itself it will not have a good gameplay loop. Additionally this card uses art that already exists on a magic card. I'm not particularly bothered by that but it can lead to a bit of confusion so if you can avoid that it helps.
 Alyssa says: You forgot the “on it” part of “with a -1/-1 counter on it.” You don’t capitalize the “The” in “the Stormwreck Sea”. Otherwise, formatting is good!
I feel mixed things about this card. On the one hand, it’s mechanically sound, on the other I’m not entirely sure how well it will play. It’s a seemingly very powerful trigger, but I worry that its implementation is internally competitive. You want to steal big stuff here, which is good, but as a 1/5 infect on its own you can only steal things that have 4 or less power that attack into Ichorfleet Despoiler. You aren’t going to be taking any Colossal Dreadmaws with this thing. Similarly, anything it can safely block will probably be worthless when you get it: it’ll be out of the way, sure, but I want more for 5 mana. If the surrounding environment supports putting -1/-1 counters onto creatures, then this could have applications, but it’s really, really bad at triggering its own ability and I think that should be taken into account.
I’m always awkward about putting infect onto things. Once again, this exposes another internal competition within the card. Its 1 infect damage means it’s going to kill people at the speed of a Coral Eel, but I don’t like that you’re incentivized to steal your opponent’s stuff, which probably won’t have infect. You want to win in infect by dealing 10 damage as quickly as possible, but because “not having poison counters” isn’t a resource, you don’t really gain much through incremental, slow upticking. If you’re stealing creatures without infect it’s like the damage this deals doesn’t even matter. In effect, it’s kind of like giving this infect has reduced its power to 0. Just give it wither, like several other entrants have twigged.
It’s a good card, but it just doesn’t sit right to me. The potential line of “attack with my dinky infect rat, get blocked by a gigantic dinosaur, play Despoiler main 2 and steal it” is really fun but once you’ve seen it once you’ve seen it all. This is a card that’s so hard to evaluate outside of set context.
The flavor is lovely, but this art is in use! It’s the art for Siren of the Silent Song from Born of the Gods. Reverse image search your images before you use them just to make sure.
Possible improvements:
-          Give it wither, so it can actually attack well.
-          Swap out the art for something that hasn’t been used.
-          Consider making the card better at activating its own abilities, so it doesn’t rely on the context of a set that doesn’t exist.
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 3/5
Flavor – 4/5
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Michael says: So because of the nature of this card as a goblin piker I am less reviewing the card as I am the mechanic, and to be totally honest I am not super keen. The mechanic is clearly a riff on explore, providing a poison counter instead of a +1/+1 counter. My concern with this kind of mechanic is that it would struggle to exist in an environment with infect already present as they compete with similar design space and infect is often easier to get to 10 counters thanks to how it scales and is repeatable. With this mechanic you would need to trigger it and hit a non-land 10 times to win and that is almost impossible in limited if we assume the mechanic is seeded like explore was in Ixalan. Another issue here is that these poison counters are functionally useless until you hit 10 meaning that there is no real benefit for the first 9, whereas with explore the +1/+1 counters can be supremely relevant to the board. Encroach would need to be significantly pushed in how often you can activate it in order to see any amount of constructed play and in doing so could produce a harmful standard environment as these counters would be more difficult to interact with than creature damage through infect. In addition seeing this effect on a BB goblin piker at uncommon is very below rate, while this effect existed in Ixalan the explore trigger was significant in that it existed on both a 1/2 and a 2/1 while also costing one coloured and one generic mana. This card is seriously underpowered in almost every circumstance except when the opponent is on 9 poison counters and I am unsure as to how the mechanic could be tweaked and still keep the flavour of phyrexia while also working similar to explore.
 Alyssa says: Formatting wise, this is completely fine. It wants to be a Soldier, though. Or perhaps a Horror, with appropriate art?
Mechanically, I don’t really have that much to say. Encroach is a very weak ability because it really doesn’t do anything to alter the game state aside from when your opponent has nine poison, which, if that is only being spread through encroach, means the first nine activations that don’t hit a land basically do nothing. With explore, both times you’re getting something, whether that’s a land card or a counter plus a surveil, but with the Conquistador you just give a worthless poison counter. It also feels very lackluster as a concept. It’s literally just explore, but with a tinge of Phyrexian spice that ironically makes it weaker. I can’t think of a set that would want this as one of its 3.5 mechanics. The card wants to be 1B rather than BB. For BB you’re getting a 2/2, or perhaps a 3/2, with that basic effect, especially at uncommon.
A big problem I have is that it’s ripped wholesale from Vraska’s Conquistador, which is also a black uncommon 2 mana 2/1 Vampire with the same art (which you didn’t credit, by the by.) There’s nothing spooky or Phyrexian about the art that tells me that this thing is encroaching on Ixalan, and there’s no flavor either. It just feels like it was slapped together in a couple minutes from Vraska’s Conquistador, even down to the name, with a mechanic that’s just Explore covered in Phyrexian graffiti.
Possible improvements:
-          It needs to be overhauled from the top.
-          Encroach needs some genuine thought to turn it into an incremental poison/value generation mechanic, with a benefit on top of just giving them a single poison counter.
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 2/5
Flavor – 1/5
And finally we have our winner for this week:
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Michael says: This is a safe design, but I think it checks a lot of boxes for a good call back design while still having its own unique effect. Here the original value engine of kumena is replaced with an infect strategy which supports itself through a token creation ability that also possess infect. I also enjoy how in order to fuel his unblockability, it requires a sacrifice instead of just tapping merfolk, an elegant way of powering down the card in a very flavourful way thanks to the addition of black to his mana cost. While infect can be scary I think the limiters on dealing combat damage to players to trigger the token making definitely helps to mitigate the potential of the card. In order to break this card you would need a lot of tribal investment and synergies, which means he would probably make a strong commander but his standard impact can be well measured. In addition to this the formatting has no problems and the art was well picked for this card. Honestly it makes me sad I cant say much more about this card, its just a really good example of linking old and new flavour. The power level may be a bit suspect but I think it is correct to err on the side of caution for infect cards, especially with built in evasion.
Alyssa says: The formatting is superb. You even got the rules for multiple instances of a legendary creature’s name in a text box right! I also appreciate that you provided the token it produces.
I always get leery of infect, but I can honestly see it working here. The stats are about right (considering it attacks players as a 4/4) especially for a 3-color legendary creature. It’s not Boltable, but it has no inbuilt protection, which I feel compensates. The combat damage trigger is a little uninspired, and perhaps a little weak. I’d like to see something sexier, maybe a card draw? I can’t help but look at Phyrexian Swarmlord as a point of comparison. But I suppose incremental infect production is a decent enough compensation. Either way, I feel it’s a good implementation of infect on a creature that is its own game plan.
You could probably dink the sacrifice condition for his unblockability down to two merfolk. Going in on a -3 to then get, I dunno, Divine Arrowed or whatever is really sad. I like it being free on mana but high on card disadvantage to really sneak infect hits through.
Flavorwise, he’s a real treat. Lovely to see a Phyrexian card with a bit of personality, especially with him being all shouty up in the card art. Flavor text is actually unnecessary on this, in my opinion. His charisma and influence is demonstrated by the Merfolk he summons, his cruelty by how quickly he disposes of them for his own benefit. It’s a shame he’s not a Zombie too but the typeline is packed to the gills (ha) already.
Possible improvements:
-          I want to see either the combat damage trigger a bit sexier or the unblockability trigger a little cheaper.
Grades:
Formatting – 5/5
Function – 4/5
Flavor – 5/5
So thank you to everyone who submitted a card and to Hyperviper for his winning design of Kumena, the Tainted Tyrant. As always feedback on this would be greatly appreciated and hopefully the next prompt should be provided shortly.
 As a bonus please see our take on the prompt with Azor the Mad, unable to intervene in the conflict thanks to his oath limiting simply to providing a passive sanctuary on Useless Island.
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drkungfus-customs · 5 years
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Mtg Custom Card Competition Round 1: Rabiah
Hello everyone and welcome to the first custom card competition for mtg cards that I have judged. For this round, submissions were gathered from a discord server and the results have been judged by myself and my partner in crime Alyssa. The theme this week was Rabiah. Participants were asked to design a card that could have been printed if the set Arabian Nights was designed in 2019 with modern design sensibilities.
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Alyssa says:
Flavourwise, it’s real fun! Trade as a method of getting white card advantage is really nice, and the art, name and flavour text all flow together. It’s not really that exciting, though. There’s nothing particularly mystical about the capitalism of antiquity!
Remember to capitalise Human and Treasure. Is it meant to scale to every Human everyone else plays too? If so, that’s a little too strong. Keep it to Humans you create.
The draw effect being “free” mana-wise isn’t that much of a problem. I’d add a tap to the ability so you can’t abuse it so freely. If this were blue, and cost 3 mana, then that effect would maybe fly, but white doesn’t get that.
Michael says:
So this card seemed a slam dunk at first, it has excellent flavour, very pretty art, and an appropriate white effect as we have seen the colour move into treasure generation a lot more in recent sets to compensate for its core weakness of mana ramp. This was until I got to the last line. Card draw in white is something that must be carefully monitored as it is one of the fundamental aspects of colour balance in magic. A good litmus test for this kind of effect is mentor of the meek, if a card can draw better or draw easier than mentor it probably crosses the line from a bend to a break in white.
Because the card itself produces treasure at a considerable rate, on a good body (thankfully still within bolt/push range), there is no real opportunity cost to the drawing as the treasure tokens also come incidentally by doing things a mono white deck wants to do. If this was a tap ability or had some kind of limiter the card would probably be acceptable but as it stands it represents a potent draw engine in any creature heavy deck, and god forbid what would happen in a Selesnya token strategy or an EDH deck running smothering tithe.
While the human type rider does help to limit this card, it is the most common creature type and so more often or not this card will provide good value even in decks not built around the card. Overall I really dig the treasure creation as a reward for building to a theme but the card draw is far too powerful and generic to be considered acceptable in mono white.
Possible improvements:
o   Currently this card is a break in white, either adding blue or limiting the rate of card draw would bring it into line with whites modern design philosophy.
o   It shouldn’t activate from your opponents Humans, symmetrical tribal effects have been retired due to poor gameplay.
o   It feels a shame to tie it to Humans, which are such a supported type. Making it rewarding to a more obscure tribe such as Advisors could be interesting.
Grades:
Formatting – 4/5
Function – 2/5 (would be a 4/5 with the drawing ability fixed or removed)
Flavour – 4/5
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Alyssa says:
The formatting here has several notable issues:
o   As-written, the cast from hand effect gives temporary unblockability but the combat damage Treasure-making effect is permanent because you haven’t given it a duration.
o   Every time you define a token on a card, unless you’re writing a modifier for how many of the same type of token are produced by the same effect under different conditions (like Increasing Devotion, Gather the Townsfolk or Saproling Migration) you need to define those tokens again, so you’ll need to write out the Treasure text for the second effect. Make space on the card by omitting the reminder text on Flashback.
o   Magic uses numerals to refer to life, damage, stats and costs, but everywhere else they write out the numbers, so you create five Treasures rather than 5.
o   The destroy effect on casting it from the graveyard should just be sacrifice. You don’t need to make it a targeted destroy just because the original effect destroys, because you can use the cast-from-graveyard replacement effect to override its targeting, just like how Overload makes a targeting spell into a non-targeting one.
It’s fine as a card, but it feels kind of weak and the two effects don’t feel connected. The first cast feels like a good effect with good flavour ties, but I’m not sure how the second effect ties into it. The first incentivises high creature quality (giving a big beater evasion) while the second incentivises low creature quality (sacrificing a worthless token to get advantage) and while the environment for those two interacting can exist (read: Rise of the Eldrazi) it’s rare.
Triple black feels far too colour-intensive in an effect we’ve seen at 2B and 1B before. I am also not entirely sure what is happening from a flavour perspective when the creature gets destroyed. If it’s being closed off in the Cave of Wonders, how the hell do you get the treasures out?
Michael says:
The flavour on this card is very apparent, showing off an iconic scene with using the alternate flashback effect to progress the story of this card. I very much enjoy how well the flavour and mechanics have been integrated on this card especially in a way that is in-colour for Dimir. However the templating very much needs work, the effect can be unclear on a first read. Something as simple as a paragraph break between the regular and flashback effects would do wonders to the overall card. 
In addition when designing black costs, sacrifice is usually a preferred choice both flavourfully and mechanically as the flashback just becomes a seething song when you possess an indestructible creature. I think this card has very strong flavour and story but has a few formatting concerns that take away from its impact. While the card can go mana positive I think the card is balanced well enough to not create any dangerous situations. Solid workhorse uncommons are just as important as flashy mythic rares and this card could help to signal a more aggressive or saboteur based blue black deck in the limited environment, although the card is a little disjointed in effect possibly due to it being created to match the flavour rather than the other way around.
Possible improvements:
o   Formatting changes as Alyssa has acknowledged.
o   Changing the effect so that it doesn’t split the card’s focus. If you want to get increasing Treasure value, perhaps just make it mono-blue, the flashback cost 2U and make the damage dealing effect create three Treasures instead.
o   Perhaps a small pump of +1/+0 to help solidify its role in limited decks.
Grades:
o   Formatting 3/5
o   Function 2/5
o   Flavour 3/5
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Alyssa says:
Flavourwise it’s fine, but not particularly imaginative. Genie wishes have been done before a lot and this doesn’t really do anything new with the effect except some ridiculous efficiency. (I’ll get into that later.) Formatting wise, it’s mostly fine. “It gains suspend” should be its own sentence. You missed “on it” for the land card drop.
Are the extra cards put on the bottom of your deck? I feel like you’re trying to make the “cost” of the effect be that it mills you slightly, which isn’t really that dangerous for reasons I’m going to get into, because the card is ridiculously strong.
It’s not hard to just casually spin this in your opponent’s end step with basic tutors or Brainstorm-like effects to find your best card, put it on top of your library, exile it with suspend and one time counter on it and just drop it like it’s hot. Five mana Emrakul, the Promised End with its cast effect? Anything that isn’t a land obtainable for free as long as you wait till your upkeep for it?
The second effect really doesn’t need to be there and is still really strong. Even though you can whiff, it can still effectively mean colourless 0 mana ramp every turn even if you lose the lands eventually. But it’s not like you’ll really want an effect like this when you’re doing top-deck manipulation to drop your biggest and best cards for free. It’s just overkill at that point.
Michael says:
This card feels intended to be fun but I believe has accidentally became far scarier than intended. I believe this card is firstly a lot more complex than it needs to be. The second ability that searches for lands adds a lot of extra complexity for this card and doesn't really add much to the overall playability. I believe it could be cut without losing the core effect of the card.
I would express serious concerns over power level however. Its nature as a colourless artifact means any deck can include it, miracle shells and cards such as sensei's divining top and scroll rack allow for significant levels of top deck manipulation which would make its random nature a lot more controlled especially in older formats and EDH. Being able to activate this card in your opponents end step for almost no cost also takes away any kind of risk to playing this card as even played fairly this allows for serious cheating on mana costs with a bit of luck.
There is also the slight problem that there is no rider to return the exiled cards to the bottom of the deck which would be standard for this kind of effect. While I assume this was accidental, it means that as submitted this card can mill your entire deck for a jace/lab man kill. There is clear potential in this card as a fun semi-random value piece but as it stands right now it has too few safety valves, and there is a clear risk of variance where one game you mill twenty cards to get to a one drop and the next where you rip Ulamog off the top on turn four. If anyone tried to play this card unfairly, as competitive players will certainly try to, this card will fundamentally break the mana system. Adding a mana cost to the effect and possibly increasing the casting cost is going to be the easiest way to preserve this card's intended purpose without being used as a combo piece, or just tying the suspend cost to cmc as opposed to how many cards milled. Also don’t forget the artist credits, that’s always important to have on custom cards.
Possible improvements:
o   Remove the second ability entirely. It’s superfluous at the best of times.
o   Jack a hefty mana cost on that ability. To keep the artifact at 4 mana, I want to make the ability cost 5 or 6. Alternatively, make you shuffle your library as part of the effect to make it a bit less spooky. Compare to Temporal Aperture or Mind’s Desire, which have a similar effect but deliberately shuffle your library beforehand. One thing you could do is make it a static suspend value, maybe 3, rather than however many cards you flip, because if you have to shuffle your library for that you might get stuff exiled with suspend 7 or whatever.
Grades:
o   Formatting – 4/5
o   Function – 1/5
o   Flavour – 2/5
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Alyssa says:
Beautiful flavour. This card looks gorgeous and makes me very happy to read. Your formatting is flawless as well. The flavour clearly stems from his portrayal in the original arabian nights stories so I appreciate the top down design here.
Unfortunately, this card kind of pays for itself with what might amount to an upside in a bad spot by making additional chump blockers/sac fodder, like a bargain bin Bitterblossom. Additionally the downside is also relatively small, as is the payoff. I wouldn’t have a problem with leaving him tapped for a few turns which I feel isn’t good for a sexy black 4 mana 6/6: those stats and that colour want to have a stronger downside for a stronger payoff. Think Phyrexian Obliterator or Death’s Shadow: Black’s big creatures go hard on the pro and harder on the con. I don’t feel like I’ve lost anything if he doesn’t make a big splashy impact on the board.
Michael says:
This card I quite like. While it’s unusual to see humans as powerful as a 6/6, that is about the maximum I would realistically expect to see for the tribe so that isn't too much of an issue. The flavour of a mono black king who uses his subjects is absolutely on point though and feels very in fitting for the feel of arabian nights so good job on that front. My foremost concern with this card is that there is no real downside to this card, while the king requires a sacrifice in your upkeep he has a built in method to mitigate this in his automatic ability to create soldiers. However there is a really easy fix to this, just include a cost to his ability to create tokens. Replacing this with a repeatable activated ability for an amount of mana feels too white so instead I would propose adding a cost to his end of turn trigger, possibly discarding a card to ensure that there is a price to splashing the king. Although given humans are the most popular tribe and many cards are incidentally human, I imagine that there will be plenty of sacrifice fodder in both constructed and limited. Overall good work on this one, a strong design that just needs a few tweaks to be good to go and really screams arabian nights flavour (in a good way).
Possible improvements:
o   Include a cost for the human token production. Perhaps “At the beginning of your end step, you may discard a card. If you do, create a 1/1 white Human creature token.” The card disadvantage is a real downer, but you have an option not to if you can’t.
o   Go a bit harder on his power level. Something on the level of a keyword ability such as menace for example wouldn’t hurt.
o   Make the damage life loss. Possibly amp it up to 3.
Grades:
o   Formatting – 5/5
o   Function – 3/5
o   Flavour – 4/5
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Alyssa says:
The flavour is nice, perfectly evocative of what Aladdin is. Perhaps it’s a bit too safe? This is what I’d expect Aladdin to do: maybe I was hoping for a little more. The formatting is mostly good, but as of now the steal effect is permanent and not tied to Aladdin staying in play. Was this intentional? Permanent steal effects are Blue’s wheelhouse, not Red’s, making it a colour bend. (Red does get to steal stuff, especially artifacts, but it very rarely gets to keep it.) I wouldn’t be averse to seeing this effect on an Izzet Aladdin for example.
It’s a simple, clean effect that has the potential for sick card advantage. I like it! It feels like something you could open in an artifacts matter set. I wouldn’t be surprised to see a similar card when we return to Kaladesh.
Michael says:
This card is interesting. As a four cmc legendary creature that fixes a core problem with mono red in an in-colour way, this card is clearly very good in EDH. However this card also is a significant tempo play and value generator in an environment that is heavy on artifacts which would probably give it legs in standard, albeit constrained thanks to the legendary supertype. My main concern with this card is that there is no condition or limitation to the steal effect. Indefinite stealing of cards is a very blue effect, while playing with artifacts is red, so I would like to make this an izzet card, but the flavour clearly does not support blue. Therefore to make this card more in line with the colour pie I would add either an end of turn clause to the steal, a limit on the cmc of the artifact, or at the very least have stolen artifacts return when this card leaves the battlefield. Return on leaving the battlefield seems the most appropriate option to me to help avoid flicker abuse in commander while still preserving the flavour of the card. Other than that good job, this is an excellent effort to provide a balanced and flavourful red card that I believe would excite people to play with.
Possible improvements:
o   Address the colour pie bend, or otherwise tie the stealing effect to Aladdin’s survival.
Grades
o   Formatting 5/5
o   Function 4/5
o   Flavour 4/5
So congratulations to Shanobi and her submission of Aladdin, Prince of Thieves as the winner for this week. It was a close race between Aladdin and King Shahrayah but where we could point to a few areas of improvement for the King, Aladdin felt perfect with just a minor tweak to bring his effect more into red’s area of the colour pie. 
It has been a fun week to judge and hopefully we should see these competitions continue if there is renewed interest in our judging. If any of you have any feedback or improvements to our judging style, please don’t hesitate to let us know.
Thank you all for your hard work and submissions!
As a bonus Alyssa and I worked briefly on what our theoretical submission could have been to this contest which we based off a monster from Iranian folklore and posted for fun here in Zahak, Hunger-Cursed.
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