doulayogimama

[doulayogimama]

It’s cool to experiment with things and be able to see the data in real time.

I sprayed homemade magnesium water on my back, legs, and feet. Going to see if that improves my sleep stats tomorrow morning. 🙏🏽

#my ring is like go to bed earlier you dumb bitch 😂

[doulayogimama]

Remember my childhood friend that I reconnected with over new years, I wrote her a letter?

So in January, she says she has friends staying with her, that she will write soon when they're gone and she's in the head space.

Then in February, she sends several voice texts apologizing for not writing to me yet, but that there are a lot of "not so great" things happening in her life right now and she's just trying to deal with them.

I still haven't heard back from her and I don't care about a response to my letter, I'm truly just concerned for her. I still know her. I could hear in her voice that things truly weren't okay. I offered to meet up with her in either city -- no response. She has made a suicide attempt before, shortly after I moved to CO from Miami -- she told me 2-3 months after the fact. She is living on her own in NYC, her entire family is in Miami, and to my knowledge (I've seen her a couple of times over the last decade) she has not been involved with anyone seriously since we were like 18 years old. So I truly hope she has a good support system friends wise in NYC.

She posted one story a couple months ago and I was like... she does not look mentally well. I just wish we were closer. I wish it was appropriate for me to do more but it's not.

[doulayogimama]

Jenny Holzer, Public Art, Times Square, New York, 1982

[doulayogimama]

Obsessed with this ring for its fertility tracking features already and I’m only 3 nights in ✨

I feel in my body that the app is right and OV is today.

It’s also like an Apple Watch, but more reliable. The pulse in your fingers is much more accurate than your wrist, apparently. So I have that when I want to track my workout which is nice!

Sad I don’t have the cute gold version that matches my jewelry 😭 But I’m really happy with the product so in the next couple years if I’m still using this I will spend the extra $150 for the gold ✨

#just have to remove the ring when I have a cute outfit on #oura ring #fertility awareness method

[doulayogimama]

Kevin and I stand firm in our decision that we are not interested in raising our children religious -- any religion. We are spiritual people and if they decide to be religious Jews, Catholics, Hindus, etc. I will support them 100%.

But my gosh -- something happened to my mama heart when my daughter (who knows nothing about Passover Seder or the songs associated) stood up on her chair with her cousins and tried her best to listen to the harmony of the people and sing along. I was quite literally crying at the table, watching my 3 year old light up with joy, singing songs with her cousins that her Jewish ancestors have sung for thousands of years.

Tradition is a beautiful thing. I wish we could have tradition without some of the repressive nature of religion. My (born Jewish, once-upon-a-time almost a rabbi) husband was sitting at the table looking uncomfortable because he has trauma around leaving his faith and does NOT want to teach Sky squat, so that burden falls to me, the ex-Catholic, lol. Once he saw me crying and saw the moment through my eyes, he softened and thought it was sweet. I just don't think he will ever forgive the fact that he spent so much of his life repressed --encouraged not to speak or look at females, reading Torah all day as a teenager instead of playing sports, feeling ashamed about his teenage bodily changes and being unable to talk to anyone for fear of his parents getting upset.

Anyways - I believe in balance. I will learn the songs with Sky and we can enjoy singing them together. We can revel in the miracle that her ancestors once sat around a table just like us with their loved ones and that we are here now continuing their tradition. That's pretty cool.

#passover

[doulayogimama]

[doulayogimama]

[doulayogimama]

I know I am truly under my stupid bodies fertile spell because I just saw a twin boy announcement and thought: "aww that would be so cute"

I think Sky would love twin brothers. And then I could feel like we are truly ~d o n e~ with having biological kids.

But fucking hell would I risk losing my mind in the process, lol.

#hormones you are a real powerful force

[doulayogimama]

This is so much better than the Temp Drop or using a normal BBT 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Damn, the Temp Drop was so glitchy. Super annoying to sync every day. Sometimes your band slipped off so the temps would be wrong. The Oura ring just does it for you. You open the NC app and your temperature is there, ready 👌🏽

Yesterday, before applying the ring, it said OV was predicted CD 14 and after just 12 hours of usage, it’s updated to CD16 (which sounds more like my cycle pattern). That’s pretty impressive! I thought it wouldn’t get a read on me this cycle.

#Oura #fertility awareness method

[doulayogimama]

Roller blading is so much fun. 🫶🏽 I’m going to take my headphones out next time — I feel confident enough now after 3x of going around. It’s so relaxing, when you get in a flow.

My Mimi called me 2 days ago and told me she REALLY wanted me to go to Miami for Mother’s Day (we just left Miami on 4/3 so kinda ridiculous timing). Call me crazy, but if she’s paying, let’s goooo 💃🏽

Kevin didn’t want to leave his mom for Mother’s Day so I’m flying with Sky to Miami alone and he’s meeting us there 3 days later. Then we will stay there 1 week all together before we come back to NY. We will not be leaving the tri state area all summer 👍🏽 (but also who knows)

#really considering bringing my skates

[doulayogimama]

"Your job, throughout your entire life, is to disappoint as many people as it takes to avoid disappointing yourself."

— GLENNON DOYLE

#quotes

[doulayogimama]

My Mimi called me today and asked me to fly down for Mother’s Day, which is in like ~two weeks. I just left Miami three weeks ago. My Mimi said she would pay for all of our flights, but Kevin said he felt it would be disrespectful to leave his mom for Mother’s Day when we just got here.

I would personally like to go to spend Mother’s Day with my family. If it’s free to go, and I was told by Kevin that of course I could go to see my family, it’s Mother’s Day. I can do whatever I want. But I don’t know what to do. I’ve never taken Sky on a plane away from him and I know that’s a normal thing to do but it just feels weird… she’s so close to Kevin and I’m scared to take her away for like 5 days or something.

#and I have to decide soon

[doulayogimama]

Pesach Sephardi menu

carrot and sweet potato soup

veggie sushi

almond flour wraps with hummus veggies and potato chips

sweet potato and black bean quesadillas or nachos

salad with black + garbanzo beans

hummus + crackers

tortilla chips + guac

mash + veggies

salad kit

leek + potato soup

quinoa, sweet potato + kale bowl

french fries

#passover #years past have been spent sneaking out to Taco Bell subway or Panera bread lol

[doulayogimama]

It's Passover cleaning day. Lord help me, I loathe this holiday.

However, this will probably be the most tolerable year yet. Through a lot of communication with Kevin's mom, I've been able to find out that my room can be a Sephardi room and because Kevin is married to me, he can eat Sephardi food too, lol. I am also permitted gluten free items, like crackers. So I have almond + seed crackers that I can eat with hummus this year, which is a big win - that's my go to snack or girl lunch along with some fruit or something (is this what the kids say????)

ALSO - I found out Sephardi can have CORN!!! I can eat tortilla chips and guac, I can make bean + cheese quesadillas so long as the pan is my own and I wash it outside, lmao. I might just run out to the nearest taco place but ya know, it's amazinggg that I have tortilla chips to eat this year.

I am going to roast sweet potatoes and wash garbanzo + black beans. I can make a big salad with all of the above plus with the sweet potato and avo I can make tik tok sushi with the baby nori sheets (I have microwaveable sticky rice I can make because yes, I have a non kosher microwave and fridge in our room hahaha).

This week is just insanity with the food and cleaning, phewwww.

#I'm essentially going to be a gluten free vegetarian this week

[doulayogimama]

Saturdays are Shabbat here in Kevin’s families house so it’s the 1 day he takes (mostly) off; therefore, he’s primary parent on Saturdays and not me 😆

He went to his friends house for a couple hours with Sky (lives 5 min walk away). She ran around with her cousins while us parents hung out outside.

I drank my second cup of coffee for the day in solitude and peace. I got stoned and took a magnesium bath. I don’t know why, but I’m resonating with melancholic T Swift (I mean, I do know why lol) so I listened to that in the bath. I don’t think it’s a masterpiece, but it’s just my vibe right now, if that makes sense and doesn’t sound TOO annoyingly vague.

Legs are shaved, hair is washed ✅ An Olympic feat for us parents with long ass hair. Going to rest and eat all the carbs before Passover 😬

#it’s the law so I gotta do it

[doulayogimama]

@puerilismus

[doulayogimama]

I just received a vape delivery from a legal recreational dispensary to my in laws house 😂 👌🏽

#what a time to be alive #happy 420 #NY