diaperesrossi - Tumblr blog

diaperesrossi · 5 months

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First of all, thank you for who you are, and especially for choosing to share it with the world.

I am DL, with very few AB tendencies, if I understand correctly, you are also like that, with a connection to the DL world mainly.

There are very few women in the community in general, and in particular those who are DL. It's really refreshing to see that the first girl I notice that she's DL, she's also the most amazing beauty I've ever seen wearing diapers, and with a face that has real angelic cuteness.

I wanted to ask, and I would be very happy if you could answer, Even if not a complete answer, at least to know that you read and saw what I wrote, it will be very, very flattering to me.

When did you start wanting to wear a diaper? Is it sexual? If so, at what age did you realize it was related to sexual arousal? And if not, what in your soul makes you want this? At what age did you first put on diapers after initial weaning from diapers? And according to the fact that you had, from what I understand, late night wets, did your parents force you to wear a diaper? And when was the first time you put on a diaper in a section where it was clear to you that it was a so-called 'forbidden act'?

Sorry for the flood of questions.

I had a theory that was destroyed because of you, that these are only men can be a DL, because the sexual sensation associated with diapers somehow comes from stimulation and friction of the genital organ at a very young age in a diaper, which causes the brain to develop something very primitive to want a diaper, something that, technically, does not happen with women or should not happen for obvious reasons. And this is the reason that from the very, very basic tests I did, a lot of DL, these are children who were weaned at a relatively late age, 3, 4 and even 5. Then they develop the desire to wear a diaper, and at the age of 13 or so, it develops into something sexual. And that is why women are not DL, because the stimulation is supposed to be a lot more rarer.

One last thing I want to tell you is that the day I see a picture of you with a soaked diaper under your clothes, my day looks like rainbow.

Thank you so much��for this!!!

Hiiyaaa 💕👸🏼

Thank you for such a kind message 🤗 I am definitely more into the DL side of things, you are absolutely correct but I do love some aspects of the AB side, I just don’t tend to share them online as much.

So I just started kindof dabbling in the world of diapers a few years ago, but had been wetting my pants and bed (some accidents, some on purpose) for literal years before I discovered the idea of wearing diapers… When I was a teen I went through phases where I would wet my bed like every night on purpose and then try to hide the evidence in the morning from my parents 🤦🏼‍♀️ they mentioned things a couple of times, but nowhere near the amount I was actually wetting the bed… they probably knew though lol.. l I definitely have a watersports kink, absolutely 🙊. Anyway I felt so silly for not thinking about the idea of using diapers sooner but diapers just never occurred to me lol. A few years back I saw my first porn video with another girl in a diaper and I was just in awe and had to try it myself 🤭.

Slowly I started to indulge more and more into blogs and personal ab/dl blogs to the point that I just kindof gradually mentally got myself in a space where I thought that I could try wearing diapers more often, which started off as just at night (when I was 26 to answer one of your questions)…. But somewhere in this phase I realized the convenience aspect of wearing 👀.. I could actually go through a full night in bed without having to get up to pee, so what started as a kink lead to discovering more than just that. I started wearing diapers all night, every night and just got used to waking up and wetting them, but this slowly, and I do mean slowly, about a year of wearing every night, turned into me starting to barely remember waking up to wet and eventually just flat out not remembering/not waking up and wetting myself most nights of the week. This was kindof scary but also turned me on? 🤷🏼‍♀️🤭 sooo I just kept doing it.

Here’s where the “convenience” aspect let me start wearing during the day: long road trips or long days out with my partner meant there was no real good spots to stop for the restroom all of the time. Things like concerts or big gatherings where there is drinking and long lines for the ladies room… I started wearing diapers to some of these things, not much as first but when I’d go back to not being diapered and have to suffer waiting in line, or waiting for a pit stop.. it was those moments that I seriously realized how much better it was being padded 💡 It was a little scary at first wearing diapers in public, especially wetting them.. also especially because I typically wear leggings or short dresses, so there is always some way that it can be seen. I’ve slowly just started to realize most people don’t care what you’re wearing for underwear, especially strangers. Friends on the other hand… 😬🫠 I know that some of my friends have noticed my diapers. I’ve had friends over for wine nights and forgot (on multiple occasions) to throw away my night time diapey and it was folded up on the bathroom floor and two of my friends went in there before I had went in and noticed. I’ve had a leak while waiting for a cab with my other friend and it was just us waiting outside in the quiet and I know she could hear the leaking onto the pavement. I also have multiple pictures on here of a diaper(s) I was wearing for while we were all hanging out…. So like all that and many other random occasions I’m sure lots of my friends know I wear diapers, I’m just waiting for someone to say something 🙊🙊 but part of me knowing they know, secretly turns me on? I’m super weird 🫠

So anyway since I knew there was a really big and accepting community out there for this, I finally got the courage to make a blog on Tumblr. It actually just started out as a personal blog for myself to be honest. Just a place where I could document my progress and share this side of me, for pictures I could go back and look at… I had no idea it would blow up like this. 😳 but I am extremely grateful and happy about it 💕💕

I wear diapers all of the time now, and am 100% nighttime bladder incontinent, and daytime at this point of a year wearing diapers 24/7 and NEVER trying to hold it….. I’m like basically there for daytime incontinence. 2 years ago I could totally hold it for hours like any other girl, but now I legitimately need diapers to keep me ‘dry’. I did it all to myself and part of me can’t believe it, but most of me is really happy I did it to myself 💕

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diaperesrossi · 1 year

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24/7

Since it seems that eveyone is doing this, imma hop on the trend as well

Ill be diapered 24/7 for as long as i get

1 like = 1 day

1 reblog = 2 days

1 comment = 3 days

1 follow = 5 days

I'll leave this post up and pin it to the top and Calculate the time from now up until the 31st January at 12pm

Once the time starts in diapers I will be keeping the blog updated daily.

Im not a big account so this shouldn't be too long.

Please stop or I will never make it out of diapers again!

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diaperesrossi · 1 year

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diaperesrossi · 1 year

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Since it seems that eveyone is doing this, imma hop on the trend aswell

Ill be diapered 24/7 for as long as i get

1 like = 1 day

1 reblog = 3 days

1 comment = 3 days

1 follow = 5 days

I'll leave this post up and Calculate the time from now up until my birthday February 14th.

Im not a big account so this shouldn't be too long.

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diaperesrossi · 1 year

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Daddy I'm not too little! See, I can reach! 👶🏼

JustForFans

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diaperesrossi · 2 years

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Tummy time crinkles!

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diaperesrossi · 2 years

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Hey there I just discovered your Tumblr page. What a treasure trove of info! You rock my world!

A tiny bit about me, I’ve been 247 for about 5 years now, and fully dedicated to unpotty training for about 2-3 years. Mostly focused on urinary incontinence (though I have bowel accidents from time to time as well).

1. Currently I’m at the point where I can still exercise a tiny bit of bladder control if I sense a full bladder before I reflexively wet. It ranges anywhere from 30 seconds to 2 minutes before my bladder muscles give out and I start wetting. My question for you is do you think it is possible to get that number to 0 seconds? (Absolutely no ability to hold it in)? Or is that unrealistic? I realize that even at 2 minutes it’s impractical for me to go without diapers. But even so, I get dysphoric even at the idea of being able to hold it in.

2. I read on another answer you gave that you notice loss of control is irreversible after 5 years. Did you mean 5 years of 24/7 or 5 years of incontinence? Anything I can do to speed things up so it’s irreversible sooner? At this point I know darn well what I’m getting myself into, and I already have to cope with all the struggles that people with “medical causes” experience. (Other than needing to cath). I fully intend to spend the rest of my life diaper dependent, and the sooner I can ensure that happens, the better I’ll be emotionally.

Thanks!!

Hey there I just discovered your Tumblr page.

Hey jessm5! Welcome!

What a treasure trove of info! You rock my world!

I'm really glad it's helping! Thank you for the lovely compliment.

A tiny bit about me, I’ve been 247 for about 5 years now,

Congratulations! That's an impressive job.

and fully dedicated to unpotty training for about 2-3 years. Mostly focused on urinary incontinence (though I have bowel accidents from time to time as well).

Totally understandable! Do be advised that UI considerably increases the chance that you are going to develop FI whether you specifically aim for it or not, due to shared muscle groups.

My question for you is do you think it is possible to get that number to 0 seconds? (Absolutely no ability to hold it in)? Or is that unrealistic?

I don't think it's unrealistic! I have been in diapers continuously for a little over eight years, and I cannot hold at all. After you reach the point where you don't have enough control to give you any meaningful benefit, and therefore have no reason to retain it, my experience has been that the residual control continues to slope downhill.

Eventually it becomes so weak that you can't feel whether you're using it or not, can't perceptibly contract the relevant muscles, and lose muscle fibre from atrophy, permanently putting an end to your ability to exercise that kind of control.

even so, I get dysphoric even at the idea of being able to hold it in.

What do you mean by 'dysphoric' here? While I'm not offended by it, body integrity dysphoria and gender dysphoria are obviously two different things; I'm worried that intermingling the terminology without clarification will muddy the waters. However, I absolutely understand vehemently and viscerally not wanting to hold it in.

I read on another answer you gave that you notice loss of control is irreversible after 5 years. Did you mean 5 years of 24/7 or 5 years of incontinence?

Good questions! A very precise definition of what I meant would be: if through untraining someone's level of control drops to a certain point, and doesn't rise above that point again within at most 5 years, for a variety of reasons it is (IME invariably) not possible for them to regain more than that degree of control over any timescale.

"5 years" is a rule of thumb. Irreversibility of loss of control sets in through a variety of different mechanisms depending on the person and their specific untraining process; 5 years after continence loss is just the horizon after which, IME, 100% of people are not able to effect a perceptible change in their continence.

There are definitely nuances, and those nuances are interdependent, such that this rule of thumb applies exactly as written to precisely two continence phenomena:

day wetting prior to the onset of bedwetting;

messing.

Other continence situations tend to operate under slightly different rules:

Bedwetting is reliably irreversible much sooner than 5 years after onset. By the time it becomes a relatively predictable phenomenon happening at a consistent interval, bedwetting is, IME, always irreversible. Exactly how long after onset bedwetting tends to become irreversible is something I haven't yet established. I've known one individual who was able to fully reverse bedwetting and day wetting after about 3 months of irregular accidents.

On the other hand, I've known a couple of individuals who went cold turkey after literally their first wet night, but who nonetheless experienced subsequent bedwetting progression at about the same rate and severity I've observed it happen in people who stayed in diapers, and who were not able to meaningfully halt or reverse it.

After the onset of bedwetting, pantswetting rapidly becomes partially irreversible. I've written about this before, but I have some experience of people who retrained from a point after they became bedwetters. The most continent people in that group had what can probably be called toddler/preschooler continence: they were always still bedwetters; they virtually always had stress UI and random wetting accidents, and would often wet themselves if their attention was distracted. Over 9 in 10 reported wetting themselves if they were startled. About 1 in 2 reported at least some circumstances under which they would not be able to control their bowels; slightly fewer than 1 in 5 reported that they would involuntarily fill their pants if scared or startled. Greater than 3 in 5 still had to wear diapers for need for at least some proportion of the day.

Anything I can do to speed things up so it’s irreversible sooner?

Depending on how your loss of control has progressed, it may already be irreversible. 5 years is the longest-reasonable time to irreversibility, not the median. I have corresponded with at least one person who made an attempt to retrain approximately 2 years after losing continence and got absolutely nowhere.

For me personally, after I developed untraining-related UI sometime in the first half of 2013, while I maintained residual control for a good while, I was never able to actually meaningfully reverse my loss of control; by June 2013 I couldn't stay dry for long enough to be out of diapers, and I have never gotten above that level since. I had well-developed FI by early 2015 and was able to reverse it somewhat when I tried in late 2015, but not when I tried again in early-to-mid-2016.

At this point I know darn well what I’m getting myself into, and I already have to cope with all the struggles that people with “medical causes” experience. (Other than needing to cath).

And other than that you want it and they typically don't :P

I fully intend to spend the rest of my life diaper dependent, and the sooner I can ensure that happens, the better I’ll be emotionally.

You mentioned that you've been untraining for 2 to 3 years and that you have what I would characterise as trace bladder control. Has your bladder control been like that for 2+ years? If so, I wouldn't worry; while you might still have the capacity to regain some vestigial control if you were inclined to do so, it's extremely unlikely that you still have the capacity to get dry enough to get out of diapers, and if you're also a bedwetter the probability only increases. I would say that for you, diaper dependence is pretty comfortably in the bag.

Thanks!!

No worries! I really hope this post was helpful!

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diaperesrossi · 2 years

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Heya Kali! Just wanted to update on my previous ask about my SO wanting to retrain me. This may be a tad long as I took lots of notes on what they said, and I was just curious about your thoughts on some of the major points that I felt were worth asking you about. I ended up compiling a list of references (most I got from your posts) as well some concerns I had and sat my SO down and had a conversation. I basically went through the list and specifically mentioned the recorded struggles that many untrained people have had with regaining control, especially those who’ve been untrained for several years. I made sure to stress that I was willing to go through with it for their sake, but I wanted them to understand that there was a high chance of failure. The references seemed to help them understand my current position a bit more, but they still want me to at least try. During this following conversation I tried to let them articulate their points without interjecting or planting my own thoughts as much as possible because I wanted to try and understand their viewpoints. I then went through my concerns, I started with what would be their conditions of failure? As I was very curious if they planned on perpetually trying to retrain me forever, or if there were end terms. To which they didn’t really have an answer for, but said it really depended on if there were any noticeable improvements, which made sense to me. I followed up and asked what exactly their plan was, which it seemed like they’ve been thinking about this quite a bit as their answer was quite confident. Essentially their belief was that my lack of control was due to a mental block where I lost the associated feeling of “going to the bathroom” and that the way to regain that sense was to plant myself on the potty on a frequent timer to positively enforce the feeling of “going to the bathroom” in the sense that I’ll re-associate that feeling over time. I’m not quite sure I understand how this would help as to me, it’s a physical issue and not mental that’s preventing me from controlling my bladder/bowels. And not only that, I have no idea how that would help in regard to bed wetting/messing. The last question that I was really curious about was why this suddenly came up. Their reasoning was that at first when I had control it was just a minor inconvenience to them that they simply put up with because they loved me. But as my control deteriorated and accidents started happening much more frequently, they began noticing that their role as my SO had started blending into a weird “Babysitter-like” role where they felt like they had to check up on me every once in awhile to make sure I wasn’t leaking or currently messy. They then expanded on it and basically said between constantly having to carry around a diaper bag, and check my diapers for me, it felt like to them that they were taking care of a toddler instead of their SO, and if we were to have kids in the future (which we both want) they’re not sure if they’d be able to hand two kids in diapers at the same time. I will admit that I’m not always the first to notice when I’ve had an accident, and up to this point I hadn’t realized it was that significant of an issue for them. I apologized profusely for being so inconsiderate and putting them through that. All in all, I completely understand where they’re coming from and agree with a few points they brought up while also disagreeing on others. We both stressed how much we love each other even if I don’t go through with retraining. We both felt this conversation was extremely constructive for our relationship, and I promised that I would try to get better at being an adult about my incontinence. I’m not sure if I’ll go through with their plan, it just doesn’t seem like it would help in any way if anything it would probably annoy more, but I am open to trying something. In the end I basically left it open ended telling them that I’d like to do some more research on it which left them hopeful. If you had any resources, or even suggestions on what could

possibly work, I’d be extremely grateful! Might even earn me some brownie points with my SO~

Heya Kali!

Hey again, @vulpix76!

I ended up compiling a list of references (most I got from your posts)

I am both honoured by having been useful and intimidated by the responsibility.

The references seemed to help them understand my current position a bit more, but they still want me to at least try.

I'm sure you don't blame them, and, inasmuch as it is my business, I don't blame them either. The heart wants what it wants (E. Dickinson, personal communication, spring 1862).

During this following conversation I tried to let them articulate their points without interjecting or planting my own thoughts as much as possible because I wanted to try and understand their viewpoints.

That's incredible. I am really happy to hear that you do that in your relationship. For goodness' sake please keep doing it. More couples should.

To which they didn’t really have an answer for, but said it really depended on if there were any noticeable improvements, which made sense to me.

It makes sense to me. I will say that I would expect noticeable improvements would probably stop being/have stopped being likely at, ballpark, 3 years 6 months. This is midway between 2 years (you can probably make significant improvements but full continence is almost certainly off the table and leaving diapers may or may not be possible) and 5 years (you are unlikely to be able to change your continence in a way that even you can detect).

Essentially their belief was that my lack of control was due to a mental block where I lost the associated feeling of “going to the bathroom” and that the way to regain that sense was to plant myself on the potty on a frequent timer to positively enforce the feeling of “going to the bathroom” in the sense that I’ll re-associate that feeling over time.

Iiiinteresting. There is certainly a psychosensory element to untraining, namely that in the initial stages of untraining you learn to filter out and block any residual signals of voiding urgency because they are no longer relevant. However, that's not the main component of how untraining works. It works:

behaviourally, by inculcating new continence-related motor behaviours that are written to motor memory and over time replace the previous behaviours, same way it's virtually impossible to ride a bike shakily once you know how to ride one well;

physiologically, by using the previous phase to inculcate behaviours that lead to weakening of the muscles of bladder and bowel retention over time to the point that not only do you have little to no muscle memory of how to operate them, they cannot be operated to a degree sufficient to function, and eventually actual loss of the underlying muscle occurs.

I don't have the benefit of being inside your SO's head or knowing what they're saying first-hand (although I trust that you are telling the truth!), but I can't see what they're going for. Toilet training, of any kind, is supposed to promote awareness of the need to use the potty. Timed potty trips seem like they would promote more voiding in the toilet by sheer coincidence, but would do nothing to actually address awareness of need.

it’s a physical issue and not mental that’s preventing me from controlling my bladder/bowels.

At 4 years in, it is pretty definitely a physical issue. Based on your description, you have the conventional end-state of untraining, high-volume stress UI and passive FI to solids, which in this case is likely underpinned by a fair degree of muscle loss.

And not only that, I have no idea how that would help in regard to bed wetting/messing.

(I interpreted this as meaning "bed messing," i.e. filling your diapers in your sleep.)

As far as I can tell, it wouldn't. Childhood bedwetting spontaneously self-cures after toilet training, but it doesn't self-cure because of toilet training; it self-cures because it's a developmental delay and the body finally catches up. Your bedwetting and messing are durable adult-onset physiological issues that come from a completely different mechanism and cause, and are pretty definitely permanent; I don't know anyone who has successfully reduced their bedwetting.

they began noticing that their role as my SO had started blending into a weird “Babysitter-like” role where they felt like they had to check up on me every once in awhile to make sure I wasn’t leaking or currently messy.

I respectfully understand where they're coming from. I avoid relationships partly because I emotionally don't want to be and practically really cannot be in a relationship where my SO can't get comfortable with being in the role you described.

I will admit that I’m not always the first to notice when I’ve had an accident, and up to this point I hadn’t realized it was that significant of an issue for them. I apologized profusely for being so inconsiderate and putting them through that.

I'm glad they told you, and it seems to me like it was considerate for you to apologise. At face value, it seems like you could perhaps remedy this somewhat by regularly checking yourself and acting, to an extent, as your own caregiver — a solution I'm sure you've considered.

We both stressed how much we love each other even if I don’t go through with retraining.

I'm glad to hear that. You deserve love.

If you had any resources, or even suggestions on what could possibly work, I’d be extremely grateful! Might even earn me some brownie points with my SO~

With great regret, I honestly can't bring any to mind off the top of my head — despite the fact that I talk a lot about retraining, I unfortunately still write primarily about untraining and dependence, and my retraining resources section is dusty and little-used. However, that doesn't mean I don't have any! I will dig through my archives and, just as soon as I can, I'll let you know.

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diaperesrossi · 2 years

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How I Became A Chronic Bedwetter

So I just want to make a quick disclaimer at the start. This post is telling you how I, personally, started wetting the bed every night. To my knowledge, nobody else has tried doing this method, and even the people I have shared this with previously who wanted to do it never actually went through with it, so I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who has done this. I tailored this method completely to myself and can’t tell you that this will work for everyone because nobody else has ever tried it.

Some of you may have originally seen this method on a Wordpress site I made back in 2016, as I uploaded it there originally and it got about 500 views, but because of so many requests, I decided to rewrite it and post it here on Tumblr : )

Scary ominous warning at the start, I absolutely detested the experience of doing this method, and even to this day, I remember how much it fucking sucked. I’m not telling you to do this, this is just what I did and what has made me a permanent, relentless bedwetter for the past almost four years.

In my strong belief, everything about each kind of untraining is hugely mental in nature. There are physical elements to it, like muscle degradation, but like 80% of untraining is essentially just retraining our body and our subconscious mind into accepting and embracing incontinence.

What I did to start bedwetting was kind of prey on and take advantage of my subconscious in a way.

For a period of about a month straight, and I do mean a month, I drank a lot of water before bed and then went to sleep without a diaper on. As you can probably imagine, all that water before bed caused me to wake up in the middle of the night with a pretty strong urge to go to the bathroom (if you are not a light sleeper, this wouldn’t work). What I did was, instead of wetting myself as soon as I woke up like other guides mention (which would have been a bit unpleasant anyway as I wasn’t wearing diapers), I made myself get up and walk to the bathroom to use the toilet instead, every single night.

I’ll tell you right now, doing this for an entire month was literally one of the worst experiences I’ve ever had in my entire life. I was constantly losing sleep and was constantly tired every day because of how interrupted my rest was, but I guess the reason I stuck with it was because I was pretty fucking hardcore about wanting to be a bedwetter at the time.

Finally, after all that, the end of the month came, and I introduced diapers to my probably completely exhausted and unhappy subconscious as an easy out to its current predicament. For those unaware, our subconscious mind will pretty much do anything it can to avoid pain or discomfort, and it will do everything it can to use as little energy as possible in running the body.

On that first night after the month of hell, I wore diapers to bed.

Like before, I drank a lot of water before going to sleep, and also like before, my body woke me up with a very full bladder. What was different this time though is that instead of making myself get up and walk all the way to the bathroom to use the toilet, I just let my bladder go and very happily wet my diaper while still laying in bed, before going back to sleep.

The next night I did the same thing again. I drank a lot before going to sleep, and I wore a diaper to bed. This time though, I didn’t wake up during the night at all. I awoke actually feeling pretty refreshed for once, which in itself was a relief because I’d gone so long waking up exhausted, but that wasn’t the only thing that had happened. My diaper was completely soaked when I woke up.

This was the turnaround point in my nighttime incontinence. I had put my body and mind through hell for an entire month, before showing them both that there was a much easier way to deal with the problem than waking me up.

From that day onwards, I started waking up wet more and more. I was still having dry nights here and there to start with, but as my body kept learning and kept finding no problem in making me wet while still asleep, it kept happening again and again.

Over the course of months after that day, my body got fully in the habit of making me a complete bedwetter, because why would it ever wake me up when it was so much easier to just make me wet myself in my sleep? I went from three to four wet nights a week to it being incredibly strange to wake up dry even once or twice a month. I even had to get thicker, more absorbent diapers because my body just stopped holding anything back, and it wasn’t uncommon at the time to wake up in a leaking diaper in the morning.

So, that’s how I became a chronic bedwetter almost four years ago. I don’t think I would really recommend my method because it was just so bad dealing with all the sleep deprivation, but I can’t argue with the results that it has given me. Becoming a bedwetter was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my entire life, and I’ve never once regretted it in all this time, even on the mornings where I wake up in a wet patch because my diaper has failed. There’s just something about it that is so insanely special to me, and unlike making yourself incontinent during the day, which I wouldn’t recommend to everyone, I would recommend becoming a bedwetter to anyone who has the interest. It’s really not that big of a deal to have to wear diapers to bed every night, and the happiness and satisfaction I get from waking up in a completely soaked diaper in the morning is just totally unmatched.

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diaperesrossi · 2 years

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Stages of adjustment to untraining

The terminology I use to describe various kinds of diapers is taken from this post.

Stage 1

This is the ‘casual’ stage. The subject is continuing to wear underwear while trying out various kinds of diapers — usually pull-ups and convenience-oriented diapers.

This stage can include any level of intensity of diaper wearing below 24/7, but explicitly doesn’t include 24/7 of any kind. However, people can be wearing diapers in a routine fashion, regularly, and the majority of the time during this stage. An example of how this can happen is if a person wears diapers only when doing x, where x is an activity they spend the majority of their time doing. For example, they might be someone who decided to wear diapers only when out of the house, who then got a full-time job.

At the start of this stage, the subject is usually at their personal peak continence, which is 100% for a lot of people and may be lower for some people, such as the author. Progression through this stage is usually characterised by some loss of continence — not complete loss, but a light to moderate amount.

Stage 2

This stage is characterised by the gradual to complete elimination of underwear from one’s wardrobe. This is usually a progressive thing — as I mentioned above, light to moderate loss of control accumulates during Stage 1. The person often responds to this by switching to pull-ups in situations where they absolutely must not have wet pants. This creates a feedback loop, where additional time spent wearing protection reinforces the psychological safety of losing control, so they lose more control and it becomes preferable to wear pull-ups, rather than underwear, in more and more situations.

Prior to the end of this stage, the person has completely stopped wearing underwear and has sustained sufficient loss of conscious continence that they would not be ‘safe’ out of pull-ups or diapers for any significant amount of time.

In terms of clothing, the person will usually be wearing the same clothes that they wore prior to going into diapers full-time, but will have made basic concessions, such as wearing bodysuits. They will still largely be adapting their diapers and clothes to each other by picking diapers that fit under their clothes and not wearing clothes that don’t fit over their diapers, although they may make the odd isolated clothing purchase specifically to fit their diapers.

Stage 3

As the person is already in diapers full time, they are usually buying diapers that last long enough to be conveniently changed, while remaining reasonably cheap and discreet. These tend to last about 4 hours.

This stage is usually brought on by the onset of bedwetting. The reason for this is that bedwetting poses a different logistical challenge from daytime wetting. Specifically, a person may change into their overnight diaper up to, say, an hour before they go to bed, and will sleep for 8 to 10 hours. By definition, they can’t change during the night — if they have a supportive partner, their partner might change them, but midnight changes will probably get old fast.

As a result, function-oriented diapers tend to enter the wardrobe. They are much more absorbent in order to get through the night, usually a lot bulkier and noisier, but it doesn’t really matter because, at this point, the person is only wearing them at home.

Pull-ups are usually gone by about halfway through this stage. When the wearer eliminates underwear to switch to pull-ups, they’re usually thinking about unconscious losses of a few droplets, or small accidents that they will notice and can easily stop. By this point, however, they are having much heavier accidents, are much less likely to notice them, and almost certainly cannot effectively stop them.

It’s also usually the case that messing control is starting to degrade by this stage. The person will usually not be regularly filling their diapers uncontrollably, but their control will be increasingly subject to their diet and the level and kind of physical activity they undertake.

In terms of clothing and accessories, the majority of the wardrobe tends to turn over during this stage. Waterproof pants will definitely enter the mix if they weren’t in it before. Boxers tend to be abandoned entirely and replaced by bodysuits or nothing. Two-piece pyjama sets tend to be replaced by sleepers.

Pants are usually turned over completely and the new pants are picked to fit at least wet diapers, and increasingly, messy ones. This last is a practical matter and usually not an intentional process; whether at home or at the store, whether taking measurements or trying clothes on, the person is usually doing them in at least quite wet and bulky diapers, and increasingly will find themselves accidentally filling their diapers between leaving their car and making their purchase.

New categories of clothes will also enter the wardrobe. Bib-and-brace overalls in particular become especially popular around this point.

Stage 4

By fairly early in this stage, the basically or actually complete loss of daytime wetting control has been accomplished. Bedwetting is routine, regular, and usually multiple times a week minimum at the start of this stage, eventually progressing to every night. This stage also tends to be accompanied by the progressive degradation and finally complete loss of messing control.

As a result of both things, function-maximising diapers are brought in at this point. This is for several reasons. One of them is that at this point, with the person being completely incontinent, the changing process is quite time-consuming, and the person is going through a sufficient diversity of life experiences while diapered that the time simply isn’t available. Consequently, function-maximising diapers become necessary as a way to remain mobile and functional while heavily wet and messy.

Also, messing one’s diapers also uses absorbency — meaning that a person who both wets and messes their diapers needs significantly more absorbent and likely bulkier diapers than one who wets their diapers alone, for the same circumstances (the same diapers will be overnights for a wetter-only and daytime diapers for someone who is completely incontinent).

In terms of clothing, there tends to be additional progressive turnover. This is partly because the person is likely to move to function-oriented and function-maximising diapers exclusively, which need more allowance in terms of fit (function-maximising diapers especially).

Discretion in the sense of complete concealment of diapers recedes as a priority because it isn’t practical — the person is wearing diapers that heavily shape the outline of the body even when dry, and using them in a way which massively reshapes that outline. They also cause gait alteration (“waddle”). As a result, assuring 100% concealment is effectively impossible.

Because of this, the primary focus of discretion becomes complying with applicable decency laws and ethics. Clothes will be picked to completely and comfortably fit over diapers, with little regard for trying to play down the concentration of mass around the butt, hips and crotch, but plenty of regard for having a deep crotch and a loose butt.

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