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detnakajima · 4 years

Note

ℒ is for the way Anzu looks at Atsushi >:3c

Watch Anzu have a breakdown: accepting

Atsushi was amazing, she always thought as much. He’s gone through so much and yet he always remained kind and compassionate, he still had the strength to fight and despite him not understanding a lick of the slang she would tell him, he was always so patient and willing to learn, even if he still couldn’t quite grasp what she meant. He put forward an effort, and it deeply saddened her that he seemed to try to work for a right to live, a right that he already had. Atsushi was just someone who deserved better than the hand life had dealt him, a boy plagued by the past, a past that gave him a tolerance for the most terrible of treatment but a boy who was stubborn enough to fight despite it all.

Everything about Atsushi was simply, something to admire, even the shallow things that Anzu normally dismissed ( she thought that if you were simply pretty with nothing of value to offer then you should simply develop a personality )- perhaps it’s simply due to his eyes, they were unique, unique enough to find herself staring at them when he wasn’t looking at her. Heterochromia, but not the kind that she’s familiar with, something that gave away that he wasn’t exactly the most normal of people, something that made him deeply mysterious. She doesn’t focus too much on looks though, because if she did, she’d probably be fired by now and she’d probably be fooled by half the words people said to her.

Still, no matter what, there was just something about the boy that was almost stupidly likeable, she thinks, as she kicks a can across the road during her walk home- her mind has been on him a lot lately, on if he’s eating well, if he needs more clothes, if he’s aware of his importance, if he’s happy. It’s odd, she thinks, flatly, that he’s been swarming around her mind like a fly- no matter how much she tries to focus on other things, there’s an occasional voice in the back of her head bugging her about him. It’s not like her at all, normally she’d have some respect for herself and be able to bury herself in work with no thoughts other than her deadlines in her head.

Though she supposed Atsushi was a special case. It wasn’t often that she met someone so interesting, even with her ties with Yumenosaki, there was some things she wouldn’t even think of before she encountered him. He was simply, someone unexpected and their friendship, naturally made him occupy her thoughts! Right? That’s gotta be it! After all, it’s only natural for you to be filled with warm feelings whenever you saw your friends smile, it’s only natural to insist that you pay for everything, it’s only natural for your heart to skip a beat-

“...Oh no.” She stopped, face becoming a deep shade of red as she stared down at the can on the floor. Oh dear lord...this couldn’t be right could it? She doesn’t know what she could possibly do now. Should she avoid him? She normally would- Anzu couldn’t simply have such feelings for someone, not when they deserved so much better than her (and Atsushi certainly did- he deserved so much better than a woman who lost her right to be alive so long ago ) and it would be the quickest way to rid of them...but she didn’t want to hurt him.

A wavering sigh and then she begins her walk once more, panic coursing through her brain yet being too tired to think straight, all Anzu could think of was sleep- or to simply work herself until she died. Perhaps it’d be less mortifying and less depressing and hey, if she was unconscious, she wouldn’t have to cope with this. She should know better than this, to fall for someone, her life was dedicated to other people, she was a tool to use and destroy on a whim, she wasn’t allowed the luxury of such feelings, not when she was this disgusting. If this whole ordeal wasn’t so upsetting, she’d probably look to someone for advice, but for now, all she could come up with was to have some much needed time for herself. Time to come to her senses.

Time to get over these silly feelings that someone like her shouldn’t have to begin with.

#( saved tag TBA) [ I LOVE THEM .. ]#‹ ship › ─ we’ve been great pretenders ; but i profess one truth ; i love you ─ subserviiient #[ BABY YOU DESERVE ALL THE LOVE -- ]#[ honestly ; it's going to be rough for both of these idiots - ]

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detnakajima · 4 years

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Anzu/Atsushi !

Aesthetic meme: accepting

#( saved tag TBA) [ I LOVE THEM .. ]#‹ ship › ─ we’ve been great pretenders ; but i profess one truth ; i love you ─ subserviiient #‹ post › ─ memoirs of a visual kind

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detnakajima · 4 years

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subserviiient:

“Think of it as me bonding with your co-workers.”

“Bonding with my coworkers shouldn’t be you tampering with reality.” It isn’t to say that her past encounters with them were exactly normal to begin with.

#‹ crack › ─ all goes downhill in yokohama #subserviiient #[ atsushi vc: this isn't a competition anzu. ]

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detnakajima · 4 years

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Just couples thing:

Being the host of and being inhabited by an immortal destructive entity

#‹ crack › ─ all goes downhill in yokohama #‹ ship › ─ we’ve been great pretenders ; but i profess one truth ; i love you ─ subserviiient

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detnakajima · 4 years

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subserviiient:

“Ah, I’ll go looking for him then. Thank you for the help.”

“…Anyways-”

“....Anzu, don’t.”

#‹ crack › ─ all goes downhill in yokohama #subserviiient #[ atsushi sitting back like ' at least you didn't cann.ibalize anyone' ]

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detnakajima · 4 years

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subserviiient:

“Have you seen Dazai’s book? I wanna borrow it…for reasons.”

“Kobayashi-san, you’d need to ask him. But, I don’t know where it is..”

“You... are hopefully not planning on doing anything with that book, right?”

#‹ crack › ─ all goes downhill in yokohama #subserviiient #[ anzu. the furry worries for you ]

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detnakajima · 4 years

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The young detective is minding his business and will not participate in this conversation. Neither would the tiger spirit residing inside his body.

#‹ crack › ─ all goes downhill in yokohama

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detnakajima · 4 years

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subserviiient:

She smiles, he’s not exactly used to internet lingo- but he was trying and that was pretty sweet on it’s own, she gives his back a pat to show that she understands he’s not sure what certain things mean, she doesn’t mind it- she’s close with plenty of people who don’t understand the things she says. “You can ask more questions if you’d like,” she offers. “I can look it up on Urban Dictionary for a more comprehensible explanation.”

Anzu is clearly, very pleased that he got it on the mark and she nods, grinning up at him. “Yep, you got it- most people say kin, because they feel as though they could be that person at that point due to their similarities,” Anzu does laugh at that, for sure- there’s no way Ranpo would take a comparison well from what she knew of him. “Don’t worry, I won’t compare him to Sherlock Holmes, I just tried to think of a detective real quick and the only other fictional one I know is Detective Conan.” Also Detective Pikachu. She would never forget him.

“Sure is, there’s a lot we’ll never know about it- but that makes searching for answers more fun, right?” Still, she thinks it’s admirable of him to try so hard to comprehend the modern world, and if she could make it easier on him, she would.

She’s caught off guard by what he says, eyes widening at his words before a smile grows across her face, far from the one she normally gives in conversation- genuine and thoughtful. She certainly thought of the idols she produced for as family, she knew them all well and she admired them greatly, they were…they mattered to her more than she’d ever been able to say. “Thanks Atsushi,” She says, even though he likely won’t understand what she’s thanking him for. “Then, I suppose you can say Sakuma-senpai is my family. The Armed Detective Agency is yours, right? I’m glad you found people who you can be so close to.”

“Ah, I’ll introduce you two sometime,” Atsushi likely would find him…rather off putting at first, as most did, but she wanted to make sure he at least knew him. It’s better that than him being unknown to him. “Oh, my childhood wasn’t as interesting as his, actually- but I’ll be glad to tell you about anything you’d like.”

“Sure, I’ll pay for it!” she says with a grin, she meant it. She’d pay for everything if he let her, or if he didn’t, she’d dive over the counter to give her money or card if that’s what it takes. She’s stubborn enough. “Well, if you like the food there that’s all that matters, ya know?”

A rarity behind all the facades she carried was the honest smile he longed in seeing. A stranger he was not to the dilemmas of fitting in and changing, working with the current after countless times being swept and almost drowning in it. Life wasn’t unfair or fair, unjustified or justified, it existed and it was by the people around you and yourself how it was going to be. Not everyone was kind beginnings and befores -- he knew better than most -- but what mattered most of what they made of it now.

Anzu deliberately eroded such truths of her past to better facilitate working in the now. He couldn’t blame her; he was clueless about the specifics, but there were many hints for those who were acquainted enough with that something happened. He picked himself apart and rebuilt himself each night and she wasn’t any different. Their bodies existed to work in one way or another -- she pleased and he tried. They wanted a life, and found meaning to find it through different purposes.

He just hoped how she finds it was one that’d actually let her sleep and relax once in a while.

Yet, for now as the words condensed in his mind couldn’t filter out, he merely smiles in turn, allowing himself a simpler bliss that he hadn’t found throughout his life. He saw it now and wouldn’t want it gone anytime soon.

“I cannot wait until then,” he finally breathes out his response, catching himself before the stare could’ve gotten any longer and more awkward. “Any story of yours is fine, Anzu-san. I want to know how it’s like for you and your brother. My childhood is...” he shrugs, “is a childhood.”

“..Anzu-san.” Now the stubbornness of a thousand mules kicked in the moment he decided to take initiative and he should’ve seen that coming. “I know the staff at the cafe, they’re very nice, and I can afford it,” it wasn’t like most of the ADA were quite literally in debt to the first-floor cafe. That itself was a sticky situation, but it was a part of the building’s ecosystem and it kept all balanced.

“Let me treat you this once for the job well done,” he muses, “you did mention you finished some essential paperwork earlier. You deserve it.”

#‹ verse / canon › ─ the ʷᵉʳᵉᵗᶦᵍᵉʳ young detective of yokohama at your service!#subserviiient

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detnakajima · 4 years

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no surprise: atsushi/anzu

Relationship meme: accepting

where they first met and how: Atushi and Anzu have numerous paths of which their first meeting could have went, in ways that could be exciting and full of adventure, or rather mundane and passive- rather than a big chaotic event targeting her school by an ability user, it was instead a more passive meeting. Upon seeing him nervously looking around, clearly lost, the producer had approached the detective and asked him if he needed directions.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved: Flirting? More like mutual support and caring for the other one- however, with such a genuine bond between them- I’d say the feelings begin to stem within a few months, although, Anzu and Atsushi don’t realise they have said feelings until much longer due to the very nature of their feelings being based off such a friendship.

who fell for who first ( if applicable ): Anzu. It’s rare anyone wants her beyond her use, and yet Atsushi seems to care more for the person than what she can do for him, and eventually she becomes so attached to him that she can’t really deny that she has these feelings because how could she? It’s way too obvious for her to deny it...to herself at least. She’ll deny it to everyone else until she’s ready.

where their first date was and what it was like: I can see them both being confused about what to do for a date, Anzu’s never thought about them too closely and Atsushi still has no idea how they managed to get on one in the first place. Though, they soon decide to simply go out to eat and watch a movie afterwards, which Anzu insisted on paying on, and while it was awkward at first, it soon became pretty normal to them. They went out for Chazuke and then Anzu suggested a horror movie.

who asks who out and how ( with a sign? spelled out on a cake? just a simple ‘will you go out with me’? ): Anzu. She’s very blunt about it, both so that he knows she’s asking him on one ( because Anzu herself struggles to tell the difference between someone asking her to hang out or go on a date ) and to get rejected, but he instead accepts- after a while of awkward silence on both of their parts and Anzu straight up internally screaming at herself for asking.

who proposes first: .....Hard to say, I’d say Anzu’s more likely than Atsushi. She’s the more bold about it, but even if he’s rather blunt about wanting to marry her before she considers proposing to him.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away: Both of them decided to keep it secret for a while simply because they had no idea how to tell people you’re dating someone, or when you should bring it up but they came out about it pretty soon.

where the proposal happens and how ( kiss cam at a baseball game? on a hillside surrounded by ducks? at a disney park? ): Anzu doesn’t want to make it a public proposal, as she doesn’t want him to feel pressured to say yes- rather the producer plans for them to have a date and as soon as night hits, she takes him to a less populated area, like a park- and gets down on one knee.

if they adopt any pets together: Bro, they have Akinari, but if Atsushi suggests adopting a cat, or any other animal? Anzu will gladly do so, jokingly dubbing whatever animal they get their “Son” or “Daughter” which flusters the detective greatly.

who’s more dominant: ...Hard to say? I think it switches depending on who’s feeling more bold with their affections that day.

where their first kiss was and what it was like: Honestly? I think it was when Anzu decided to visit her boyfriend in the ADA to bring him lunch on one of her very rare breaks, passing him his lunch which he went to take, only to trip and well, accidentally kiss her. Both of them were already flustered by the mistake, but considering Ranpo, Yosano and Dazai were present, they only got more flustered by their teasing.

if they have any matching couples stuff ( mugs? sweaters? pillowcases? ): Well, I can’t see them actively matching things, but occasionally they’ll buy the same copy of something because the other one suggested that it was useful, or comfortable.

how into pda they are: They’re not the most into PDA, but they do hold hands, especially if the streets are busy- and they do have the occasional hug in public, especially if there was a broadcast showing he did something dangerous and she happened to catch it. He’ll be tugged into a tight hug regardless of who’s around to watch.

who holds the umbrella when it rains: Atsushi, he’s the taller one so he’s the man for the job- and they do have to walk closer when they’re under it, as they both called the other one out for trying to give them more space and getting their clothes wet because of it. Though, sometimes Anzu will shove her umbrella at him and go running into the rain so he can have it all the way home. He’ll normally tell her off for it later.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is ( if applicable ): They probably go to the arcade and fast food places more often than not, Anzu is determined to show Atsushi each game in the arcade, and they both need some nice food after the stress they go through.

who’s more protective: Both are equally very protective of the other, with Anzu not taking any slander to Atsushi lightly and getting ready to fight anyone who speaks ill of him, but Atsushi is more physically protective of the producer, she may be capable of fighting off delinquents, but she’s no match for an ability user and she is pretty gullible.

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ ): Anzu invites him over to her house to sleepover fairly quickly, actually, because she quite likes having sleepovers and doesn’t quite get why people would find it odd, and she insists he takes her bed and she the floor, the debate goes on for a while until they both decide to share the bed. The...sexual side of things takes a while longer due to her not wanting to have Takehiro around to hear them and because it flusters them both greatly, but at the end of the day, the hormones give out.

if they argue about anything: “Take care of yourself!” is a frequent statement in their arguments, it’s hard to grasp that she’s not a tool to be used of and it’s hard for him to take care of himself when there’s so much at stake but other smaller arguments come from Anzu insisting she’s going to pay for everything.

who leaves more marks ( lipstick, hickeys, scratchmarks etc. ): Anzu and Atsushi both leave a lot of marks- and they both immediately panic because they have work the next day and how are they going to cover it up when Anzu doesn’t wear makeup?!

who steals whose clothes and how often: ...Anzu, although she does offer him her skirts up rather frequently, is normally the one picking up Atsushi’s clothes and putting them on- although she does get embarrassed when he catches her moving her hand to watch his glove move.

how they cuddle ( spooning? facing each other? ): They change it up rather frequently, although normally one of them lays down on the sofa and the other one crashes on top of them, which leads in them wrapping their arms around each other and the one on top to nuzzle their face into the other’s chest.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is: They like having the rare days in, where they’ll have a coffee or tea and talk to each other, it’s nice to be away from paperwork or serious threats for a while and just unwind for a bit. She usually runs her fingers through his hair as they talk.

how long they stay mad at each other: Depends what it is! If it’s a serious argument, they can stay mad at each other for a long time, if not, it’s over and done with relatively quickly.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are: Black coffee with three shots of espresso and extra coffee is the thing that keeps Anzu most sane throughout her days, while Atsushi normally goes for a less life threatening kind of coffee, should he order one. Though he normally gets a green tea.

if they ever have any children together: Twins. So many twins. Anzu swears they’re cursed to have only twins when they reproduce, but they also adopt! Anzu jokes about adopting twins and Atsushi astral projects at the mere idea of more twins entering his household.

if they have any special pet names for each other: Sushi. Anzu calls him Sushi, both as a way to tease him and show how important he is to her, she rarely gives nicknames- far preferring to use people’s first names but for him? Sushi. Atsushi simply refers to her as Kobayashi-san.

if they ever split up and / or get back together: I can’t see them being on and off sort of people, so I’d opt for a no.

what their shared living space is like ( messy? clean? what kind of decor? ): Atsushi gets to move in with Anzu, and he finds that Anzu’s house is normally so clean it hardly looks lived in- besides her room, where her table is a cluttered mess of cans that once contained her energy drinks, a ton of paper piled up but bed sheets that looked like they were in an ad, instead of being used. She tells him that he can buy anything he wants, and even offers her mom’s credit card, telling him to go wild- he doesn’t go wild but buys a few things that caught his interest with enough prodding.

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like: Anzu invites Atsushi over to her house so she can give him cookies and some food she made before she takes his hand and declares that she’s got a live to show him. For once, she sits in the audience seats and has him watch the show with her. She’s going to make sure he has a good day, even if it kills her.

what their names are in each other’s phones: Sushi-kun with a sushi emoji and a blue heart emoji, with his simply being Kobayashi-san although she typed a (;・・;) on there when they first exchanged numbers. He does not know how to get rid of it and she thinks it’s too funny to tell him.

if they have any ‘couple traditions’ ( buying a new mug for their collection every year? baking every friday evening? ): Pointing to tigers when they appear in media and going ‘it’s you’, they have lunch together every Tuesday and Atsushi drags her ass off for designated nap time.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first: Atsushi falls asleep first, she wakes up first.

who’s the big spoon / little spoon: Big spoon? Usually Anzu, while the little spoon is normally Atsushi! They do swap places from time to time though!

who hogs the bathroom: Neither?

who kills the spiders / takes them outside: Anzu leaves them be and Atsushi takes them outside.

#( saved tag TBA) [ I LOVE THEM .. ]#‹ ship › ─ we’ve been great pretenders ; but i profess one truth ; i love you ─ subserviiient

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detnakajima · 4 years

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subserviiient:

“You got it,” She smiles, before raising an eyebrow at him calling her by her last name again. “You can simply call me Anzu, you know? Or An, people have called me An before, if you’re not comfortable using my name. Anyways, I’m happy you’re looking forward to it, but if you ever feel nervous and wanna duck out, you can tug my sleeve and I’ll get us out of there.” She can’t ramble off too much, nobody wants to hear that. Though, she does suggest a solution, so if he feels uncomfortable by the intensity, they can duck out with ease.

Kobayashi. A name she’s not used to being called, hardly anyone does it- despite it being her last name, she’s never felt a connection to it outside of business and school. She’s a Kobayashi, sure, but she never felt like one. Though, she thinks that may be a selfish thought, her parents loved her, she shouldn’t disregard that simply because she’s not used to the name. Plus, she’s not saying she dislikes being called it, she’s simply used to being called Anzu, though, she can deal with Kobayshi.

She smiles, it’s nice to see that he’s interested. “Ah, no kinning means that…you see yourself in someone so strongly, that you relate to them, like…Dazai-san would kin,” she pauses. Who would Dazai kin? “Dazai would kin…nevermind- bad choice there. Ranpo would kin Sherlock Holmes. It’s internet speak for calling someone relatable, basically,” Though she is kind of amused at the thought of Ibara and Elyon being related! It would make them both furious for sure…and she loved anything that riled Ibara up! “Ibara and Elyon relate in terms of personality, mainly.”

“Well, I kind of wish I was related to Sakuma-senpai. He’s very nice, and he’s helped me out a lot but people have said we act like we’re siblings before,” She feels awkward at the thought of talking about her parents, so she simply skips to Takehiro. “Ah, have you met him yet? I can tell you some stories about him, if you’d like- I’ve got a ton of em I’d be willing to share.”

“....Ah.” A simple note of acknowledgement, a declaration of his white flag being raised the further Anzu continued with the semantics of ‘kinning.’ It sounds something peculiar that Ranpo would’ve used casually, even make off-hand reference, not caring if others did or didn’t understand its complexities.

It’s internet talk, okay. I’ll need to look more into this. She mentioned a bit like ‘yeet’ and ‘f’ before, which I am still trying to get a handle of. Maybe someone in the office would know? I could take my chances with Dazai-san, but... I feel like that’s almost a loaded question to ask him. Almost as if it’ll give him ammunition for something I wouldn’t want to get involved with.

“Ibara-san and Elyon-san are simply just two people with certain similarities then, and nothing more,” he explains to himself, partially seeking approval from Anzu on whether or not he was getting anywhere closer. “Though, Ranpo-san and Sherlock Holmes. I don’t feel like he would be happy to be compared to him. He might take as an insult and then say he’s not on that level, even above.”

“The word’s complex, that’s what I understand,” and that’s enough progress he made today on understanding the modern world.

However, her last remarks on the topic had his head raising, golden irises apparently focused on her sky blue irises. “Anzu-san,” he looks down, speaking without hesitation for once, yet his voice is delicate and softer, “just because you’re not related, it doesn’t mean they can’t be any less family. Being related doesn’t always mean...” He forces himself to swallow the last comment, and he better words himself. “Family isn’t blood. Say they’re family and then they’re your family. That’s what I learned.”

“Oh, Takehiro-san, I haven’t yet met! You’ve spoken about him in passing,” his voice returns to its usual volume, almost as if nothing occurred. “I would really like to hear about you and your brother, actually.” Or really, he’d adore hearing anything with her that makes her happy. Even if he can’t get all of it.

"...How about we go to a cafe too by the office?” His wallet is already internally screaming at the thought of spending funds. But, he was paid recently and managed to scrap enough out of a certain someone else’s hands to spend on something else. “Some of their dishes are really nice. I haven’t had them all but, but I should say they’re all good. I just, honestly like all of them.” He couldn’t complain; food is food and he was just happy to have anything in his stomach.

#‹ crack › ─ all goes downhill in yokohama #subserviiient #[ atsushi ; looks at photo of tigger: ....dazai-san says im kin with this character ]

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