davidjjohnston3

[davidjjohnston3]

This is not even porneia...!

She became an artist at least for a while

What makes me mad is she has like 50,000 stylists

“The 50,000 ideas-men around Ms. / Artist / Singer Kim Taeyeon”

like the women around Utamaro

I remember “Miss Korea” with the neighborhood oldboys trying to figure out Yeonhee Lee’s fate

I kept faith for so long... I remember I used to listen to that YHL fanvid with “The One Thing” or “That One Thing,” One Direction

“Mom” is such a hanging judge; I remember seeing fam in 2011 in the Pomona house just sitting around slouched, how many heart-attacks, vasectomies, marriages and divorces - this is America and I have my problems but Jesus Christ, was I ever a hanging judge, was I ever laughing at people and smashing them for being unmarried at 26 in the Iraq War?

Johnston Family Promises; Johnston-Rusler Family Jurisprudence

This whole country’s a novel, what did I even do?  “Broadly benefit humanity.”  Here I am once again.  Where’s Dramafever?

I was never gonna talk about YHL again ‘cause she is a married woman and Jesus is the Prince of Peace, the Wonderful Counselor, the morning star.  She had her new day.. 

she monch

[davidjjohnston3]

faith, knowledge, care

common ground - private healthcare

i don’t know if ought to say anything

[davidjjohnston3]

I’m speaking so imprecisely of course there’s a story - THE story...

[davidjjohnston3]

Maybe it is just wrong and it seems my sentimental predilections and predispositions or simply predicament has been broadly conveyed.  Forgiveness, peace... 

It is too little of course only to say these as words but it is not my wish that one reading this should feel the past is somehow trying to claw down the present or future - it is never true for those of good faith and hard work.  I am put in mind of “Les Miserable” in a way but these novels are too complex for most young people to digest and apply properly and it is better it seems to me if they should learn to love their immediate peers, friends, neighbors..

[davidjjohnston3]

I want to eat chocolate

make me to lie down

I want to die in Korea and be buried there in ICN

I want to walk in the National Tree Garden and eat some thin rice soup

“Korea has no natural resources”

You think your life lives in the future or your projects or creations but so many people - war lives in them or these desperate abject IDK, suddenly their wars seem to live in me

“I like mindfulness meditation; I was NVA SF; nurses here are intermittent laborers; UW-Milwaukee students coast by what tools can I use to motivate them, have some chocolate”

For all the billions of words I discharged with bioparents versus this man who rode his bicycle and just wanted his son to be a medical doctor and buy a yacht - and where is he now

Always telling BioPops in “conversation”

“But that’s a different story”

[davidjjohnston3]

Innisfree Dreams, though...

I’ll slow down if the Lord give me to

duh duh duh duh DAH DAH DAH I believe

May their trees flourish fostered or native

Amen

[davidjjohnston3]

“Run To Me”

“Be With Me Now”

Hyper Midwest Lit

Midwest lit for the younger generation

so they work at the right tempo at this age

all these skinny lissome and/or staid kids working at the proprietary market WFB

Their movements remind me of Obama’s in a way

They’re more self-sure than the older folks, who seem perplexed still about wars from the past... like 400,000 military veterans in Wisconsin and kids / young men who never talk about Iraq, parents and grandparents who perhaps want to know nothing but

I ate some day-old bread in Glendale and driving my Toyota I was like “sweat sweat Iraq humidity”

Bless you Obama, I disagree with some stuff but I remember your tears for your grandmother and these kids are not living in this horrid dread of being homeless or chained to Chinese IV’s as they study for college entrance exams, that I know of

(Maybe)

[davidjjohnston3]

I got a Mach 3 wet razor at the store...

I don’t want to talk abt this stuff again b/c it’s my private concern

Take me to prison in SK and you can see what really matters about me which is my prayer-positions and vocabulary and the stuff I know and learn in my head, the stuff I don’t take notes on

[davidjjohnston3]

I’m reading Revelation... Maybe I really need to slow down and read Skinship again

“I have a friend, we wear double ply cashmere, premium cat, wine, precision massage, piano touch, gold things, expensive watch, materials aren’t bad, let’s have a home, Thanksgiving dinner with kimchi AND apples and sweet potato...”... California wine?  High fat diet?

These are the things Asian-Americans...

I wish I could just talk about my own friends from GSE and stuff, canoeing in the Pine Barrens, eating vegetable sub sandwiches, “never better than 2k2,” SK no. 4, Brazil v. Germany, my editorial, football game, pianoforte

All my second-rate department store polo-shirts / “golf” shirts

I always forgot - blessedly, blessedly - how hungry ppl are my 25.00 drug store watch and some LatinX girl “RICH DIE DIE DIE GULAG GO”

I saw 7 geese the other day fly toward West Good Hope Road and I feel like I’m barely holding it together from drumming on my own head

I want to go with these geese, 7 angels...

[davidjjohnston3]

I still wonder if I broke my contract in 2012 by drinking at all or being out at night, “society’s expectations” written into a prosecutable official document

[davidjjohnston3]

The Girl Who Wrote Loneliness is so fantastic...

24,000 pieces of candy every day, like the girl / young woman in Ikiru making rabbits for all the children of Japan

This is why I say “poor in spirit” though it means depending on God as well - I just feel like part of it is being appreciative and affectionate to others though maybe not

Maybe I’m fetishizing slaves...

[davidjjohnston3]

I need to stop abusing stimulants...

I want to go to prison / jail so badly...

My life is not the right size for me at all

I want to live in a goshiwon and write poetry and teach hagwon..

I can write 100 books of poetry easy...

I can influence still 3,100 students and I’m nice

I hit a kid with a softcover workbook once but apologized and it was legal ATT

[davidjjohnston3]

I am sad.  I want to go to prison.

I am pro-life but my parents are hostile to me because my college GF and I twice 14 years ago used emergency contraception and now they are not yet grandparents in this world, although they have supported the Democratic Party from beginning to end and my biological Pops always felt he had supreme power to extract value since I was illegitimate.

After 2007 I didn’t have a girlfriend or visit prostitutes for 14 years...

Why can’t I just labor in a prison to become..

I can only serve one Master maybe henceforward...

[davidjjohnston3]

Sometimes I think everything in my life went wrong because of the New York Times and NYT Magazine

airborne assault general in Russia, it’s good to be slightly corrupt - this guy died in helicopter crash and if Lt. Col. OK’d that I approve as well

lie on your resume in Great Recession

eat steak drink whiskey to snap a bond of love

Satanism, Faustianism

aspiring authors drinking bourbon in Brooklyn, doing all these drugs

For a long time I felt paternal towards aspiring authors since I felt as though I see them and what they are trying to be do say; in retrospect I should’ve remonstrated with them more about being intense and focused in their writing, though I guess the thing is they all understand each other and I don’t really know where they’re coming from

You can’t do drugs and not get anxiety when they’re illegal, or run around with prostitutes or anything else they do.. I feel.

[davidjjohnston3]

I have my Hail Mary’s yet to throw...

It’s the same wish

I used to think of leading other people all the way

I’m not really in their heads

[davidjjohnston3]

I really admired Min Jin Lee for Free Food for Millionaires

It gave me a sense of justice

the part where David realizes he has to deserve Ella

the part where the guy is like “I just give up I will wait forever”

For a time I wished that I could “telegraph” or write “stage-managed, top-down” fiction that wasn’t natural or intuitive but snapshots of specific instances in life (and in Time)

This is why I get upset on Twitter that it’s a brawl over 9.11 or whatever happened today 25,000,000 yesterdays ago

If you ever come to Wisc. with me let’s have a [nothing burger] by the Delafield Iraq War Memorial

[davidjjohnston3]

I have to stop being curious now...

rediscover my “Original Love”

Pope Francis / Francis PP talking about how love becomes flesh

the Incarnation is the Word made flesh as well

There was an Every Little Thing song called “Graceful World” with a certain crescendo.. teyukuuuUUU

“Fulfill my dream”