darwin-xf

[darwin-xf]

[darwin-xf]

X-Files S1E17 “E.B.E”

SCULLY: Mulder, you're the only one I trust.

SCULLY:

(She stands. He stops and turns around.)

I have never met anyone so passionate and dedicated to a belief as you. It's so intense that sometimes it's blinding. But there are others who are watching you, who know what I know and whereas I can respect and admire your passion, they will use it against you. Mulder, the truth is out there but so are lies.

God I can’t imagine watching this in the nineties and not knowing whether they would end up together I would have been frothing at the mouth.

Like the way her voice breaks a little/her inflection when she says “who will use it against you.”

[darwin-xf]

I think about his tighty whities at least once a day.

why do bad things happen to hot ppl

#skinner

[darwin-xf]

Oh sweetheart. It was hard. An episode over there and everybody would swear to God we were not seeing what we were seeing. A platonic friendship was clearly the only thing. Lol.

Then we would have to make money and raise kids and whatever until the next week when another episode aired. Sometimes it was a clunker. There was no access to the rest of it until it came out on video. So stupid. A different world. It's better now I promise. But there was a thirst then that could not possibly exist now..

X-Files S1E17 “E.B.E”

SCULLY: Mulder, you're the only one I trust.

SCULLY:

(She stands. He stops and turns around.)

I have never met anyone so passionate and dedicated to a belief as you. It's so intense that sometimes it's blinding. But there are others who are watching you, who know what I know and whereas I can respect and admire your passion, they will use it against you. Mulder, the truth is out there but so are lies.

God I can’t imagine watching this in the nineties and not knowing whether they would end up together I would have been frothing at the mouth.

Like the way her voice breaks a little/her inflection when she says “who will use it against you.”

[darwin-xf]

1993 me? Did not give two shits about aliens. Was just as obsessed with intimacy as I am today. Loved a story. Was always looking for a string to pull... But I look at this pic and I’m like... I fell into this show because these two are beautiful and I am now and always was world without end... bisexual as fuck.

[darwin-xf]

I love all genders in every way but there's something special about having a boyfriend. It's just culture but I embrace the squee.

All things//7x17

[darwin-xf]

watching biogenesis through amor fati — person after person lying to scully about mulder and every time she says they're wrong, they're liars, that isn't true. fowley telling her mulder called her because she was the only who would believe him, skinner knowing what was in her report before she sent it to him, kritschgau saying "it's why he asked for me, not you." she doesn't believe any of them, doesn't trust a single one of them with her mulder. she's his partner, she's his doctor, she believes him and she follows him & proves his hunches, her science saves him a thousand times over, she makes him a whole person, she keeps him honest, she makes him work for it but she's always there at his side. it's dana scully & fox mulder against the world and that's the only thing she can trust when he can't be there with her.

scully's faith in mulder & of his trust in her is part of their core foundation that no one can touch.

[darwin-xf]

This is the tenderest ever ever. I can't get enough of it. For 25 years. I am not well.

All things//7x17

[darwin-xf]

[darwin-xf]

1993 me? Did not give two shits about aliens. Was just as obsessed with intimacy as I am today. Loved a story. Was always looking for a string to pull... But I look at this pic and I’m like... I fell into this show because these two are beautiful and I am now and always was world without end... bisexual as fuck.

[darwin-xf]

Saw your ask-- was torn between probing about the series, but I'll abstain. Instead: Top 5 or Top 10 txf fic writers (or people you return to on rereads.)

Let's get this started and see how how the numbers come out.

These are some of the folks I consider the cream of the crop and find myself returning to. Before I start, I should probably confess that I don't read a lot of TXF fanfic these days, so I'm probably missing out on a bunch of good stuff.

In no particular order:

@mashnotesofthemythopoeic

@cecilysass

@lepus-arcticus

@broadcastnews1987

@aloysiavirgata

The writing duo of @mustangsally78 and RivkaT

@storybycorey

Karen Rasch

@darwin-xf

@leiascully

Anything any of these folks have written is a sure bet. I'd link you to particular stories for each of them, but that would take me all day and I have an apartment to clean and groceries to buy. Just go poke around and see what you find!

Thanks for the ask @randomfoggytiger!

[darwin-xf]

what many of you do not understand, though several of you do, is that dana scully is a severely embarrassing and deranged freak who always suffered under the pressures of both society and her military catholic family and if she wants to throw her life away for a weird lil obsessive guy because she thinks he’s passionate and kind and funny and makes her feel alive then that’s literally just her business

[darwin-xf]

On the contrary, what makes mulder wild what scully does to him?

Her sweet, soft breath against his ear "...please fuck me."

Pushing him off of her in the middle of missionary so she can clamber into his lap and ride him within an inch of his life

"Harder...please Mulder, harder..."

Alternately, "oh, I'm gonna come..."

Discretely palming the inside of his thigh or (more boldly) cupping his bulge when they're tucked away in a restaurant and they haven't had sex in a few days because of a case

Scratching her fingernails in his chest hair

Giving the tip of his dick a soft kiss before and after slipping him into her mouth

Rubbing herself against his leg while they're making out

"Mulder, you're crazy."

[darwin-xf]

The X-Files - Demons by Kim Manners, R. W. Goodwin.

[darwin-xf]

I love the cell phones that are 14 lb. And the wardrobe. But it's still remains timeless. It's my touchstone. That's really funny.

Sometimes I think The X-Files is such a timeless and relevant show I forget it takes place in the 90s, and then I see a scene where Scully buys a whole bag of groceries for $11.14 and pays with a check

[darwin-xf]

Gaslight, Chapter 18/48

Rated X | Read it here on AO3

King of Prussia, PA

He wakes to find Diana curled up beside him, her head on his chest. A surge of relief and love swell in him, and he pulls her closer, pressing his lips to the crown of her head. She stirs, tilting her face up to his and giving him a sleepy smile. 

“Morning,” she croaks, the smell of her breath familiar, if not pleasant. 

“Good morning,” he says back.

She accepts his kiss and then burrows back into his chest as though she intends to go back to sleep. After a moment, her hand slides down his belly and she begins to play at the elastic on his boxers, bringing his morning erection back to life. 

“I was thinking,” she says carefully, “about what you said. What you’ve been saying about your life. Our life.” He waits, and she runs her thumb back and forth just under the waist of his boxers, her fingernail lighting up a path across his skin. “I know that we never planned on having children, but I understand that it’s something you’ve had some second thoughts about.”

“Okay,” he says, just so she knows he’s listening. He’s not entirely sure where this is going. Certainly not where he thinks…right?

“I’ve given it a lot of thought,” she says, her palm now sliding under the fabric, her fingers combing through his pubic hair. “And I think that…I’m willing to try.”

“Try?...” he asks in a request for clarification. This is not something he should be making assumptions on. 

She tilts her face back up to look at him. Her eyes scatter over his face, and she purses her lips slightly before whispering, “To have a baby.”

He’s shocked. Not for too entirely long, though, as she wraps him up tightly in her fist. He responds viscerally, his hands sliding up under her nightgown as he scrambles to get closer to her. He doesn’t ask for details, doesn’t question the why, or even the how given that he understands her current form of birth control to be semi-permanent. He accepts this gift at face value, so grateful for another chance. At their marriage, at fatherhood, at a life that feels worth waking up to each day. 

Maybe this is his path to starting again. 

-

He arrives at his office feeling a renewed sense of purpose, looking forward to his 10 am appointment with a new client. 

There is so much hope, so much possibility, in a new client: the chance to change a life, to help someone find the blind corner that will lead them to better days. But it had all become so rote that the significance was lost on him, just another repeat of the same old same old. He feels as though he’s seeing the world with fresh eyes, and when he hears the doorbell that signals someone is waiting in the lobby, he springs out of his chair, excited to get started. 

The man on the other side of the door looks to be in his fifties, with a crown of gray hair around his head and a generous bald spot up top. Deep lines across his forehead and at the corners of his eyes tell the story of a life well lived, though in joy or struggle he does not yet know. 

“You must be Jack,” he says, offering his hand. “I’m Jeff, come on in.”

Jack shakes his hand, a slightly perplexed look on his face. 

“Have we met before?” he asks.

“I don’t believe so,” Jeff says, ushering him inside.

The two men take seats across from one another, and Jack curiously surveys the contents of the bookshelves, as new patients often do. 

“So, what brings you in today, Jack?” Jeff asks, a clipboard with a client intake form affixed to it resting against his knee. 

“Well,” Jack says with a resigned sigh, “a midlife crisis, I suppose.”

Jeff nods, waiting for him to continue. 

“I recently got divorced, and even though we weren’t married for all that long, I guess I’m feeling…a bit lost, you might say.”

“In what respect are you feeling lost?” Jeff asks, making a quick note. “Personally, professionally?”

Jack heaves another sigh. 

“Both, I’d say.”

“Is there any background information you think might be helpful for me, perhaps regarding your marriage? You don’t need to share your life story, unless that feels relevant, but a bit of a foundation would be helpful,” Jeff prompts him. 

“Well, I used to work in law enforcement until a couple years ago. I had a case that really put me through the ringer, shook up the whole town. It was the final straw, I suppose, because I packed up and moved to Costa Rica about six months later. Quit my job, sold my house, the whole shebang.”

Jeff nods along, bouncing a pen between his thumb and forefinger. 

“That’s where I met my wife, Yvette. It was a whirlwind romance, movie stuff.” Jack pauses, a soft, reminiscent look in his eye. His expression slowly falls, memories crossing over his face like a mask. “But, uh, it didn’t work out. I just moved back to the States a month ago and I’m trying to pick up the pieces. But I guess I feel like my life is over, in a way. I’m too old for fresh starts.”

“What makes you feel that you’re too old? What did you hope or expect your life to look like at this point?” Jeff asks. 

Jack considers him for a moment. 

“Sorry for taking us off topic, Jeff, but are you sure we’ve never met?” he asks.

“Not that I’m aware of,” Jeff answers. 

“You’re not from coastal Maine, are ya?” Jack clarifies. 

“No, I grew up on Martha’s Vineyard and I’ve lived in a handful of cities in the New England area, but never Maine,” he answers. “I want to be mindful of the time, Jack, so perhaps we can get back on topic.”

“Of course, I apologize,” Jack says with a wave of his hand. “I suppose I always saw myself married and settled by now. Leaving Ammas Beach was a big life change for me, and I thought Costa Rica was it. I thought that’s where I’d spend the rest of my life. But after I split from Yvette, it was just too hard to stick around.”

“And what is it that makes marriage and ‘settling down’ feel unattainable to you now?”

“You know what, I know where I know you from,” Jack says, pointing at him. “You look just exactly like this man from the FBI I met right before I left Ammas Beach.”

“The FBI?” Jeff asks, furrowing his eyebrows. “I actually did work for the FBI, very briefly. But that was a very long time ago, in the 80’s.”

“No,” Jack says, shaking his head. “This was in ‘98. That case I told you about, the one that shook up the town? There was this FBI agent named Dana Scully that helped me out with the investigation. I met up with her and her partner shortly before leaving for Costa Rica, and he was the spittin’ image of you. His last name was Mulder, and that’s what she called him. I never did catch his first name.”

Jeff stares at him, the rush of the air conditioning roaring in his ears. Mulder. That name again. And Dana, like the woman at the coffee shop. What are the odds?

“The female agent, Dana,” he says, clearing his throat. “What did she look like?”

“Real pretty,” Jack says emphatically. “Petite, short red hair, blue eyes. She was a real pistol. She wanted to give me some wacky UFO poster, so we met up for coffee down in DC where they worked, and she brought her partner along. I swear, you could be his twin.”

Jeff gathers additional details, which Jack seems happy to supply. The agents worked out of the J. Edgar Hoover building. Dana had been traveling through Maine on vacation when she and Jack crossed paths. She had called her partner, Mulder, several times each day while they investigated a strange and unexplainable case. Something about a living doll that Jeff doesn’t bother digging into. Then their time is up, and he has to prepare for his next client. 

“I’m sorry we didn’t take full advantage of our session today, Jack. I won’t be billing your insurance for it,” he says contritely as they part ways at his office door. 

“Don’t worry about it. Do you think you know the guy then? This Mulder?”

“Uh, I’m not sure,” Jeff answers honestly. His mind is a jumble of disparate facts that he has absolutely no idea how to make sense of. 

They make another appointment for the following week, and the day marches forward even as his mind remains stuck in one place. 

-

“This is going to sound bizarre,” Jeff says, running the pad of his middle finger around the lip of his beer bottle. 

“You have my attention,” Frank says, setting his cards on the table face down. 

“So the other day I was at a coffee shop, and this woman approached me,” he begins.

“Eh! Eh! Eh! Eh!” Simon screeches, mimicking an alarm. “Danger, Jeff Spender.”

Jeff rolls his eyes and continues. 

“She thought she knew me, and she called me ‘Mulder’. She seemed really upset when I didn’t recognize her. So that was a little odd, but then today, I had a new patient appointment and he told me that I reminded him of a man he met a couple years ago, also named ‘Mulder’.”

Mike gives him a doubtful look. 

“Who the fuck is Mulder?” he asks. 

“I have no idea,” Jeff says. “I’ve never heard the name before. But here’s where it gets freaky: the new client told me that this ‘Mulder’ he met worked with a woman named Dana, which was the name of the woman who approached me at the coffee shop.”

Simon starts humming the tune to The Twilight Zone.

“There’s more,” Jeff says, and the three other men lean in, waiting. “The client said that the woman, Dana, and the man, Mulder, worked for the FBI.”

“What the fuck, man,” Mike says, clearly disturbed. “You got a doppelganger out there living an alternate life?”

“Hold on, let’s access the power of the World Wide Web,” Frank says, standing. 

They follow him to a desktop computer, then wait several minutes while he boots it up and connects to the internet. He navigates to Yahoo and readies his cursor in the search bar. 

“How do you spell Mulder?” he asks, and the men all look at each other. 

They try several variations, none of them producing helpful results. Mulder FBI. Mulder Washington DC. Moulder, Molder, Mulder. Nothing, nothing, nothing. 

“Try searching ‘Dana Scully’,” Jeff suggests. 

Frank enters ‘Dana Skully’ and hits enter. There are a handful of white page listings, but not much else. 

“Try it with a ‘c’ instead of a ‘k’,” Simon says.

More white page listings, plus a scanned copy of the commencement program for the 1990 graduating class of Stanford University.

“Try that,” Jeff says, pointing to the screen.

It’s a multi page document containing lists of names as well as degrees conferred, some accompanied by bios. Frank scrolls slowly as they all scan over the small, grainy print on the image, working through the schools of Education, Humanities, and Law. When they come to the final pages that cover the School of Medicine, Jeff sees a familiar image and clamps his hand down on Frank’s shoulder.  

Dana Scully - Doctor of Medicine - Annapolis, MD 

Beside her name is a black and white photograph, though he doesn’t need to see her red hair and blue eyes to recognize her. It’s her, the woman from the coffee shop. There isn’t a doubt in his mind. 

They try a handful of other searches. Dana Scully, MD. Dana Scully, FBI. Dana Scully, Ellicott City. Nothing comes up. 

“Do you know anything else about her?” Frank asks. 

“No,” Jeff huffs, running his hand through his hair. “Just her first name, that she lives in Ellicott City, and that she has a husband. That’s it.”

“Well, and that two years ago she worked at the FBI with your long lost twin,” Mike jokes. 

Jeff paces the room, frustration coming off him in waves. 

“What do you think it means?” Simon asks warily. 

“I don’t know!” Jeff shouts, then pauses to compose himself. “I don’t know what it means, but it obviously means something.”

He stalks out of the room, grabbing his wallet, keys, and cell phone off the dining room table. His friends follow behind, watching him with some concern. 

“You leaving?” Frank asks, though it’s obvious that he is. 

“I need to call my mom,” he says, then pulls the door closed behind him. 

Tagging @today-in-fic

[darwin-xf]

⭐(Re)Visit a Classic XF Fic [7/7]⭐

So, as part of The X files 30th anniversary celebrations, I took it upon myself to highlight some of the AMAZING authors I first read in this fandom. They were a HUGE part of my experience of watching the show during it's original run. For shippers, the original run was a marathon in faith, frustration and endurance. We were judged, dismissed, ridiculed and gaslit throughout. But in fandom, we found solidarity, and in fanfic, we found solace. (AND we won in the end, so THERE).

As a retired author, I also have a vested interest in pleading the case of older writers. Fanfic archives are libraries, not social media sites. Don't just read whatever comes up most recently in your feed. Search. Discover. Explore. Experiment. Yes, there are some differences in older fanfic culture that are evident in these seven recs. Characters may be understood differently in their original context, narrative style may also differ (more 1st/2nd person address that even addresses the reader directly), there may also be less clear trigger warnings and fewer opportunities for feedback/community. I know we all love AO3 and are grateful for its good works. But don't forget that there are other avenues through which to explore fanfiction.

For this final rec, I want to return to the first author I rec-ed. I urge you to check out her other works. The characters are sometimes a little overwrought or OOC but even when they are, her stuff is tremendously messy, sexy and fun. Here Mulder and Scully are perfectly in character in a rather rauchy scenario. (If you're a babyphile and you don't know the politics at play then ask an auntyphile to fill you in). I will post links below for all the classic authors I have rec-ed, along with a few archives you may want to check out.

Rec #7:

MSR, obligatory stakeout fic

Prompted by current events, Mulder and Scully discuss oral sex

Some knowledge of the Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky scandal required

READ MORE BY:

Rachel Anton (inc lots of Krycek content)

Beduini

Suzanne Schramm

Shalimar

Terma99

Narida Law

The search engine is not great but Gossamer IS still up and running:

X-Libris is a current archive that is doing a great job of recovering older works. You can suggest fics to be added to the site or even ask for a long lost fic to be tracked down!!

Smaller archives but also still up and running is Whispers of X and XFSM, both of which are good for different pairings, threesomes and a bit of kink, if that's your jam.

In particular, if you're into BDSM then you may want to check out Kristel St Johns "Aphrodisia" which does a beautiful job of putting Mulder and Scully in a v different, intense kind of physical relationship . The novel is unfinished but definitely still worth a read.