danphilandilposts-blog

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Mee?!😆lol don kil me~ admin unicorn🦄

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Why do people make draco so promiscuous in fan fics? He literally only had one girlfriend throughout the entire series (and only one eye fucking partner [Harry]). Plus he grew up in a traditional home that probably didnt allow sex before marriage

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So the thing is in the actual book series JK Rowling never said what House Hagrid was in. We find out that Hagrid actually went to Hogwarts as a student really in the 2nd book–when we see Tom Riddle, the Slytherin prefect confront Hagrid in his own dorm room, and the two seemed pretty familiar with each other.

Hagrid was expelled as a 3rd year. He was born in 1928, and Riddle was born 1926. So Riddle was a 5th year prefect,

Hagrid doesn’t seem like he was particularly good at any branch of magic other than Care of Magical Creatures, so how would the two know each other? Hagrid is 2 years younger than Tom, so how would they have known each other well enough for Hagrid to call him ‘Tom,’ not Riddle?

Now, the prefects are some of the only people the oblivious Harry Potter recognizes from other Houses, other than Quidditch players. And yet we’ve never heard about prefects from other Houses coming in to discipline Gryffindor students. Hell we’ve never heard about people from other houses in the Gryffindor common room period. You really think that Tom Riddle would know enough about a 3rd year Gryffindor nobody, someone who isn’t even his year?

Not to mention this is when the Chamber of Secrets is open, a girl was killed. You think Gryffindor is going to let a powerful Slytherin traipse around their tower, when tensions are running high after being terrified all year? No.

But you know what’s much more plausible? Hagrid was a Slytherin.

Whereas it wouldn’t make any sense to be friends with a young Gryiffindor, young Slytherins are Tom’s responsibility. Tom knowing, and being able to access a 3rd year Slytherin’s dormitory–how he knew Hagrid well enough to know about Arigog, and where he’s kept– makes much more sense. Not to mention they are looking for the heir of Slytherin. Guess what hint hint they’re probably looking at a Slytherin to be accountable for Myrtle’s murder. Not a Gryffindor.

The only reason suspicion fell on Harry was because he could literally talk to snakes, and people who didn’t know enough about what happened in the past made the obvious leap “Slytherin’s monster=Snake; harry can talk to snakes=Harry’s the heir of Slytherin.”

And damn, it makes sense that Hagrid’s a Slytherin. If there’s anyone who’s a true friend to Harry it’s Hagrid, the man who tried to make sure Harry had everything he ever needed (I still get emotional thinking about Hagrid making that scrapbook for Harry. @Dumbledore maybe Harry wouldn’t have been so enraptured by the Mirror of Erised if he actually had a damn photo of his parents).

And it makes perfect sense for Hagrid to be prejudiced against Slytherin. These are the people who threw him away, who got him kicked out of Hogwarts, who would have taken away his home if Dumbledore hadn’t allowed him to stay on as groundskeeper. And yeah don’t get me wrong Hagrid definitely has morals but he’s like the definition of Slytherin loyalty, he’d do anything for the people he cares about. Just think of him hiding Gawp in the Forbidden Forrest. It’s not safe or wise or brave, he keeps that knowledge from even Dumbledore (Dumbledore, who he believes in not because of his ideals or what he stands for but because he is Dumbledore, someone Hagrid is loyal to).

But this is his brother, who is going to get hurt if he stays with the other giants. Think of how Hagrid loves Harry–now, think of Narcissa Malfoy, willing to do anything if it meant the chance her son was alive, even defy Voldemort and go against what her family had been working towards for decades. Hagrid is such a Slytherin parent.

tl;dr sure, JKR might have posted on her twitter or Pottermore that Hagrid was a Gryffindor, but writing is about showing, not telling. And she might have told us that he’s Gryffindor, but she’s showed us he’s Slytherin

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my pretty friends: ugh i look so ugly

me, a goblin from the depths of my city’s sewage system: then what the hell am i, susan

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I knew this, but I just realised it:

All of the Marauders are dead. 

Prongs, Padfoot, Moony, and Wormtail. Even Lily, who was pretty much a Marauder. Even Severus. 

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Lily: Would you shoot your best friend in the leg for 10 million pounds?

James [to Sirius]: You shoot me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big ass house and range rovers.

Sirius: You can shoot me too, we’ll have 20 million.

James: Good thinking, fuck the system!

Lily:

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drarry: who are you?

snowbaz: we're you but canon

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*In McGonagall's office for their weekly meeting*

Hermione: Dean and Seamus have been going out for nearly a year now

McGonagall: And I take it that Harry still hasn't realised

Hermione: He hasn't realised that he's been wearing a Slytherin tie for a week so it's most likely a yes

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Au where Draco commentates a Gryffindor match in 6th year

Draco: And here comes the Gryffindor team: Girl #1, Girl #2, two dudes that replaced the weasel twins, the Weasel King, Weaselet, and Saint Potter as captain.

Mcgonagall: [squinty chihuahua face]

Draco: Players are in the air and the balls are flying. There goes Potter with his stupid hair getting even stupider with the wind as he flies higher and faster than the other players, the bloody show off.

Mcgonagall: Malfoy, the game?

Draco: Yeah sure, some Gryffindor player passes the Quaffle to another Gryffindor player, who passes to girl Weasel who is intercepted by a Hufflepuff, HAHA how bad can you be to lose the Quaffle to a Hufflepuff?!

McGonagall: [raises eyebrows and looks indignant]

Draco: Erm anyways nothing much is happening, this is so boring… Look at Potter not doing anything, just there gliding in the air, Famous Potter, everyone knows he just got the Seeker position because he’s Dumbledore’s golden boy.

Draco: Oh wait, Potter dives, did he spot the Snitch or finaly found a comb?

Draco: [loudly] Don’t fall off your broom now Potter, no need to add another ridiculous scar onto that ugly face.

McGonagall: MALFOY!

Draco: What? I’m just telling him to be careful.

Draco: As I was saying before being rudely interrupted... It wasn’t the Snitch, Potty was probably just showing off, can’t stand two seconds without being the center of attention now can he? I wonder how he can fly so fast with his huge ego weighing him down.

McGonagall: That’s enough Malfoy, will you please concentrate on the game? It’s already 74-43 to Gryffindor.

Draco: Yeah well, what a shocker Hufflepuff is losing, everyone knows Gryffindor will win, Potter will definitely catch the Snitch sooner or later, don’t know what’s taking him so long though I’d have finished this game ages ago, and HE is the youngest seeker in 100 years, go figure.

Draco: Oh no, the huffdypuffdy Seeker, whatever his name is, has eyes on the Snitch. OI SCARHEAD TO YOUR LEFT.

McGonagall: Malfoy!! You can’t help the players, that’s against the rul-

Draco: Oh shut up. COME ON POTTER YOU CAN DO THIS YOU LITTLE … USE YOUR GREEN EYES FOR ONCE YOUR LIFE. FASTER POTTER PUT THOSE MUSCLED THIGHS TO GOOD USE. ALMOST THERE STRECH THAT AMAZING LEAN BODY OF YOURS.

Draco: [on his feet, flailing like mad] YAS, HE DID IT, THE GORGEOUS BASTARD DID IT [screeches]

McGonagall: …

The audience: …

The players: …

Harry: …

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Just because their friends with her doesn't mean their friends with him. I'm friends with a lot of people and I'm not friends with their significant other

They are NOT supporting him for fuck sake. They just went to Marzia’s bday party. They didn’t made a video with Felix or even said one word that what his doing is alright so can we stop with this bullshit coz it’s geting boring. You are oversensitive people and sometimes too much is too much stop acting like this

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don’t forget to keep your black cats inside on halloween, people are cruel and you can never be too sure

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I want a relationship that’s just like super cool friendship with like kissing

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me when my female fave gets a little problematic

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Slytherin: Hey, Ravenclaw, you said you would help me out if I needed something, right?

Ravenclaw: Yeah, what’s up?

Slytherin: The password to my dormitory is something bigoted again, and I was hoping I could stay in your dormitory. Could I have the password?

Ravenclaw: Of course! Just knock on the knocker and answer the Eagle’s question.

Slytherin: Wait, I have to actually think of things to get in?

Ravenclaw: Yeah, what’s the problem?

Slytherin: Fuck it, I’m asking Gryffindor, they can’t possibly be asked to think.

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I care. And I just like anyone else fall in love , every now and then. But even though my intentions are gold, my words aren’t. I don’t know how to love. My whole life I have been taunted for not being good enough, living under the weight of expectations. The only love I received was in the snarky remarks. And that’s how I love. My love is in my snide remarks, in my subtle bullying, in my indirect help. I’m sorry if my love is repulsive to you but its the only way I know.

Draco malfoy (for all the things I didn’t say)

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Texting Those Three magical words

Hufflepuff : I love you

Slytherin: yeah me too.

Hufflepuff : no say it

Slytherin : ILY

Hufflepuff: I'm not talking to you until you say you love me

Slytherin: stop it!

Hufflepuff: stop what?????

Slytherin: stop fucking saying I L**E you!!!!!!

Hufflepuff : L-O-V-E

Slytherin: I swear I'll kill you if you say the L word again.

Hufflepuff: fine :(

Slytherin :

Hufflepuff:

Slytherin: hey ?

Hufflepuff: hmm

Slytherin: I Love you