crunchycrystals

[crunchycrystals]

-poll incoming at the end of this ramble-

Instead of having a SuperWhoLock trifecta, the modern online loser has a clusterfuck of interest that are always one degree of separation away from forming one large, dorkish singularity of online entertainment. The significant pockets of the cluster fuck are as follows:

Dropout TV

Critical Role

The McElroys

Polygon

Watcher

The Try Guys

Smosh

Starkid

There are likely other pockets in the clusterfuck, as well as semantic arguments to be had over which pockets overlap too much to count as single entities, or arguments over which pockets shouldn’t count as entities at all. There are bound to be discrepancies seeing as I pulled all of this information out of my ass.

With this in mind, take a look at my handy dandy poll. If you choose one of the numbered options feel free to specify in the tags, and add anything you think I missed :]

#four babyyyyyyyyyyy if you count my. very very very casual cr viewing as a thing i partake in lol #dropout #smosh #cr #<- do yall see this lol

[crunchycrystals]

One thing I really like about Fantasy High -- and honestly Dimension 20/Brennan characters in general -- is that even the good parents are not perfect. Sandralynn is easily frustrated, especially when Fig reminds her of herself. Jawbone doesn't always know how to back off and meet people where they're at. The Thistlesprings have terrible boundaries and are deeply uncomfortable with negative emotions. In Burrow's End, Tula is constantly grappling with the urge to limit her children's options due to her own fear.

The experience of having Good Parents isn't that you get your needs met perfectly 100% of the time -- it's the experience of having one or more deeply flawed adults doing their level best to do right by you in spite of whatever shit they have going on in their own lives and psyches. And that's beautiful in its own right.

#not to be parasocial but genuinely happy this man is so excited about being a parent #d20

[crunchycrystals]

shout out to everyone who was on youtube the day the marina joyce thing happened

#crunchyposts #yt #once every 2 years i remember it happened and im like wow that was wild. i was there like less than 24 hours after it happened????

[crunchycrystals]

you know the drill sooo reblog pls.

#i genuinely dont register it as x #thats the Bird App

[crunchycrystals]

anyways im like half way through chappell roan's 2023 album and i love casual

#crunchyposts #music #i am asexual but i think the yearning in that song is very cool i love it when the lines between what people want to be #like separate types of attraction overlap #mostly romantic and platonic but in this song the separation of sexual and romantic attraction.... despite it the lines blurring #and likely some platonic in there oughhhhhhh

[crunchycrystals]

echo park be reading your soul sometimes

[crunchycrystals]

I get why she called the song "Florida!!!" and not "Florida". Personally I would have called it "🚨🚨🚨FLORIDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🚨🚨🚨"

#ts

[crunchycrystals]

#id vote for sam bc i just think sams a nice name but marcus. turning this song into a queer one shout out #ts

[crunchycrystals]

game changer, season 1: three men in their thirties make animal impressions

game changer, season 6: three improv artists are plunged into a hell dimension ruled by a chaos demon who has personally customised the stage to psychologically torture them in ways never seen before

#and also torturing us paying customers and i will be doing my best to renew my subscription next year i love it #game changer

[crunchycrystals]

#am i allowed to cry with the religious trauma of it all AUGHHHHHH #ts

[crunchycrystals]

#smartypants #i rewatched this clip to see if i could actually find waldo on the beach pic and i cackled when i realized #the photoshopped waldo was already there #this slideshow somehow got better in the last half after the incredible first half

[crunchycrystals]

I think the only way I can handle shortening the ttpd song titles is by trimming off some words (I can fix him, who's afraid, smallest man, chloe or sam... etc) because whenever I see the acronyms my brain malfunctions. waolom? mbobhft? cososom?? icfhnric?? icdiwabh? tsmwel??? those aren't songs they're keysmashes

#i hate cososom lol logically i should love it but like irrationally rn. idk lol #dont be surprised if in like a week i like it bc i do think it rolls off better than everything else #ive already cut off the t from tsmwel #ts

[crunchycrystals]

romanticizing your walk to school vs actually being there

#LITERALLLYLYJUIFDJGSFYUDSJHKAGUIDSKJGHDSJLK #me like going to school omg.... just like the movies and then as soon as i step in every single person in the hall is shouting #i fucking hate this place im so excited for graduation let me outttttttt #ts #school stuff

[crunchycrystals]

"he stole presents from white people. that's praxis."

-demi adejuyigbe, smartypants

#smartypants

[crunchycrystals]

y’all remind yourselves your account is your space. you’re not a performance. you’re not annoying by being yourself. if people aren’t into it they can leave. you’re not obligated to please anyone, especially at the cost of your personal expression. the worst thing you can do for your online enjoyment is to filter or censor yourself.

[crunchycrystals]

before the poll, a quick definition of terms:

"mutual" - you found this post from a mutual (on their blog or your dash) "following" - you found this post from someone you're following, but who isn't following you "random" - you found this by scrolling through someone's blog, who you don't follow. this includes people following you "For You" - you found this on the For You page "recommended" - you found this in a "Check out these blogs" popup, or a "recommended" post when looking at a different post "other" - you found this post some other way. comment how? "reblog ✅" - you're going to reblog, queue, or schedule this post "reblog ❌" - you're NOT going to reblog, queue, or schedule this post

with that out of the way:

[crunchycrystals]

Okay, I just need to get something out of the way when it comes to the Kipperlilly conversation nobody's brought up yet, which I think is insane. Almost all of The Bad Kids would be more powerful if they didn't have their tragedy porn tragic backstories.

First of all, this doesn't apply to Fig and Gorgug because if Fig wasn't Gorthalax's child she would be a lot like Kipperlilly and not the ruler of hell. I wouldn't say Gorgug has a tragic backstory, he's got a pretty normal growing up experience with ups and downs.

Let's start with her #1 nemesis, Riz Gukgak. She's so jealous that his dad was murdered and that gives him an advantage in the adventuring life. To be crude, no, it doesn't. What would give Riz an advantage in the adventuring life would be living with someone who has a direct contact to all the government's inner workings and conspiracies. Now that would be an advantage. That gives you connections and clues that no one else can get. This is not what happened. What happened was eating cereal with water for breakfast, what happened was not getting an opportunity at college, what happened was a 9 year old who stopped sleeping, what happened was not your secret agent dad giving you an advantage in the school conspiracy because he's dead. Otherwise he fucking would've.

And now Kipperlilly's new #1 nemesis, Kristen Applebees. She was ostracised from her religion for her sexuality, she achieved sainthood, and raised a dead god back to life. None of this would've happened if she hadn't been raised in The Harvestmen. No, it wouldn't, but what would have happened if Kristen had been straight? Disgusting thought, yes, I know, but let's talk about it. A Kristen who never left Helio behind would have so many more fucking advantages than the one with Cassandra has. If she had followed her birthright she would be the only chosen one of one of the world's most powerful gods. Sol is the biggest god in Spyre and Helio is his son. Helio does not have a chosen one anymore because Kristen left. It's not a title that's just given out, it could only have been Kristen. You know what's an advantage? Being the chosen one of one of the world's most powerful gods, being a god's spoken favourite, and deified by all of that god's followers. Now that would be an unfair advantage. You know what's not an advantage? Being homeless at 14 and being at the mercy of your ex-girlfriend's uncle for housing, dying and having absolutely no one there for you so you're only option to survive is to trust your own abilities enough to raise yourself from the dead, and failing school because of biased teachers.

And what of Adaine Abernant? The Elven Oracle? Her tragedy porn tragic backstory is surviving an abusive home. Now I just have to imagine that Adaine would have it a lot easier than most students, an incredible amount of unfair advantages, if her old money parents paid for every wizard whim she wanted, kept her diplomatic immunity so she could do literally anything she wanted without consequences, and gave her a direct contact into the heart of the Fallinell government. Now that is what I would call an insane amount of unfair advantage. I would be furious at this rich kid who's never had to work for anything myself. This is not even close to the case. She's barely passing classes because she can't afford the material you're required, she goes to the guidance counsellor for panic attacks, and she's being hunted by her home government. I'd say that's about every single thing in her life working against her having it easy.

Fabian Aramais Seacaster. He's complicated since he is very privileged already. He gets 5000 gold a month just for existing. He's the captain of the Owlbears because he killed the previous one. He lives alone in a mansion. Yeah, that's pretty privileged. His parents are also so severely fucked up that if they hadn't been filthy rich they would've been absolutely horrible for him. If he had parents who unconditionally supported him and stayed with him through everything, then we could talk about perhaps the most powerful person in Elmville. In Solace possibly. The most feared pirate in history who single-handedly dismantled a monarchy and fights against armies on his own is at your beck and call, does whatever you ask him to, and loves you more than anything. The greatest swordswoman in the world, that bested the most feared pirate in the world, the daughter of one of the most influential elven families and immortal will do anything you ask her, loves you to bits, and would cheat any rules for you. To have that would just be insane. You can argue that Fabian already has unfair advantages because of his social status and inheritance. This is true, but this is also true within his own adventuring party. Now his parents aren't helping him with anything and are determined that he reach his legendary status on his own. Otherwise talk about a fucking advantage.

All this to say is that if Kipperlilly got all of The Bad Kids tragedy porn like she wanted she wouldn't have been better, but she would've made them better. There is an adventuring party out there in the multiverse that has a secret agent at their disposal, the only chosen one of a Sol religion, Bill Seacaster and Hallariel Lomenelda at their every disposal, and a seer with unending resources and diplomatic immunity. These would've been people you start a platform about adventuring not being fair for everyone because of. The people you went against was a homeless kid, a kid with an anxiety disorder, a trust fund kid, and someone with PTSD.

I've seen your posts about Kipperlilly being wrong for her validation, but right in the fact that The Bad Kids have been given larger plots and mysteries because of their families and circumstances and I don’t want to fucking see another one. When you make that I want you to think about the adventuring party they would've been without their backstories. The insanely powerful and privileged adventuring party that almost happened. Their life got made worse, not easier because their life could have been so fucking easy. Kipperlilly can take all the tragedy porn she wants and then maybe realise that that's not what makes the adventurer. That the reason she's mad at The Bad Kids is the only reason she can even tangentially compete with them.

#d20 #fh #fhjy