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Seriously though,
Writing "u" for "you" Passed in the days of flip phones. No excuses now.
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‘90s Movie Song Problem
Why the same awe as I Will Always Love You for My Heart Will Go On? 
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Our Food & Water Supply
After a rainstorm, The LA sky shines so blue! Where did the smog go?
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I Love Sidewalk-Sharing People
Oh, leaf-blower man, So kind, pausing while I pass, I’ll pick up my pace.
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Judging The Slang
Please, keep writing "tho" And let me know your school's name. My kids won't go there. 
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Fleeting Zen
Post-yoga or church, I'm at peace. Then road rage strikes! I'm a jerk again.
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Umm, Ok, Neil Diamond...
Red wine has never Caused one to forget an ex. That's not how booze works.
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A Call For Civic Responsibility
Please: hit the button, Elevator or crosswalk, If you arrive first. 
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To Each Their Own...and Bad TV.
Minnesota Twins. For you it's baseball. For me? Brenda and Brandon.
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New Tech, Old Content
After a long day I tune out with a podcast On the Brenda Years.
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Didn't Think It Was Possible, But:
"Lockbox" sounds less dumb When candidates speak today. Rest in peace, nuance. 
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Observations on Behavior
I watch the bad kids, And see the parents suck, too. Naughty by...nurture?
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Ashley Madison Revelations
The cheaters are hacked Who knew there were so many Down with OPP
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Grocery Store Problems - CA Edition
Finally: check out! But my canvas bag is home. Defeat costs ten cents. 
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Language and Geography
I couldn't hide it, All knew I was from New York Since I stood on lines. 
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Styles of the Times
Wait, man buns are cool? Perhaps I'm too critical But I deem them gross.
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Hot Demo
Toys R Us loves me Because I have what they need: Friends who get knocked up.
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