capriciouspains

[capriciouspains]

your lips are sweet ill kiss em more if ya like.

#((abt kanaya / absylphe

[capriciouspains]

i hope he still knows he has a place with me no matter what

all this bullshit ruined us, all this fuckin fear. wrath and demian, i wish theyd just fuck off completely.

sex aside that we always got up to doing i just cared so much about him, it was never about just that. i miss bein in his life as a whole. i dont want him to disappear from me again. it feels like he never got revived.

i hope you know, rahzel, i care about you. i miss you. i wanna hang out with you whenever i can possible. please, reach out to me again soon. you do always have a home with me, and you can trust me, and have my word ill keep you safe.

[capriciouspains]

hes not gonna like me anymore

hes actin different, not into anything we used to anymore

i fucked him up somehow i know i did.

i aint wanna force him to perform anything for me or force into what he aint wanna do anymore, i aint tryin for that

but halfway through the carryin he started actin different and stopped bein as affectionate

the grumpiness i could deal with but it calmed now

everything else is still, not there anymore. what if he doesnt like me the same way anymore, we had closeness unlike anybody else.

closeness and freedom with eachother. now he just dont wanna be near me that much. we cuddle though its nice

but i keep feelin like its all my fault.

[capriciouspains]

really needin affection right now )o:

[capriciouspains]

im from the future too so my stupid ass assumed hed be all for talkin about it.

still at first i like, was like whatever

brush that shit off. hes right on not feelin happy around me or my alts.

trauma is trauma yknow what i mean

what a silyl fuckin name to call somebody though hahahaa

i feel like showerin extra hard though. i dont wanna look like that or feel like that for anybody

i dont wanna smell or be gross to motherfckers like i used to as a kid

damn

why am i in my feelings, this is fuckin stupid man

[capriciouspains]

😒

blood in ya body

give it to me

[capriciouspains]

youre so fuckin precious i just like to watch you be yourself

i wanna take care of you

[capriciouspains]

why do i think this will work

[capriciouspains]

i can make it a couple months, maybe more

yeah beat my record not drinkin blood

i can do it. maybe thigns werent good last time 'n waasnt emotherfuckinnough time to get rid of this

make it a tolerance to not drink blood

maybe i could get rid of it i dontk now

i can do it!

IM SO MOTHERFUCKIN HUNGRY I COULD DRINK ALL OUR BLOOD STORAGE IN THE MEDICULL WING

ill be fine

[capriciouspains]

youre just

so

youre so cute.

the way you stretched on my couch beside me got my heart doin flutters.

how can somebody make me feel so motherfuckin warm

its so easy to love you, to care about you.

wonder if its easy for you to do the same to me

no matter how you act, fuckin up or not, bein mean and harsh, or sweet and giving, its never been hard to love you. ya actions dont change my pump.

youre beautiful.

[capriciouspains]

MITSKI Bug Like an Angel

[capriciouspains]

i like you alot but i dont think i could make ya happy enough. got others for that. 

[capriciouspains]

#music #Spotify

[capriciouspains]

you and your fuckin pathetic mate, youre gone now, and my problems are fuckin solved

ya dont deserve a proper burial. but ill be sure to finish up ya flesh. dont worry i wont go hungry. as for his, the beasts can eat him.

[capriciouspains]

i will get her back.

[capriciouspains]

i hope you dont hate me now.

[capriciouspains]

anyway those thoughts aside and some i dont fuckin care to write out

i am. hungry.

equius is strong and got a good thinkpan

but he still fuckin faints when i take more than a few sips.

love him for it in a way. but im still hungry.

kanaya only needed a sip or two every now and then. she was fine. but me, since my case and origin of my motherfuckin curse is not natural, im like a fuckin blood thirsty beast.

i kinda wonder if theres somethin to do with the day walkers and this parasitic dna twistin blood drinkin curse.

kanaya's hatched that way yknow

but me im all fucked up.

i dont think im gettin used to it.