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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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Patiently listening as Kenna ranted towards him, Calvin couldn’t help but agree with her words. It was hard to hear them, especially when the word child was used. He liked to think of himself as a well-rounded individual, but maybe he had the wrong impression about himself. Maybe the brunette in front of him knew him better than he knew himself. “I didn’t know what else to do.” He replied back, but knew perfectly well that his answer was not what she wanted to hear. Was she expecting some well thought out response that took him days to think of? A speech he thoroughly practiced in the mirror before coming to see her? “With everything that has happened in recent weeks, I literally don’t have the slightest clue what to do. My life has literally been tumbled upside down and part of me honestly wants to run. Yes, I ran from everything here in the city, including you, but I needed to clear my head. Have time to think. I couldn’t process you being my daughter and Lorelai being alive in the same day. It was too over whelming. Instead of facing the facts like a man, I cowarded away and hurt you in the process. Something I never wanted to do.” He carefully explained, but doubted his words would make a difference. She was too angry, and he couldn’t blame her. In fact, he was angry as well. Just not towards her. She was probably the only person he wasn’t angry with. “I’m sorry to hear that. I wish I could change your mind, but what I did was wrong. I am sorry, truly.”
The Pain Secrets Bring || Kenna & Calvin
Sighing in defeat, Kenna opened the door slowly. Her eyes falling to his. “Look.” She began. “I know what I told you was going to be hard on you. it would be for anyone. I didn’t blame you for that… what I did blame you for- was running off like you did. You haven’t seen my mom in years. YEARS, Calvin, and you find out she’s here and you run. you FREAKING run. Like a child!” By now, there were tears in her eyes. So much that she didn’t realize she was bottling up so many emotions. “You spent so many years with me not knowing who I was, but I knew… and then when I told you- you ran from me. Instead of sticking around and actually getting to know me, you ran. You left me, you left my mom, you left Marcel and everyone else. You left the army! because of me! I was enough to make you run from everything you stand for. Do you know what that felt like? Do you know how much that hurt me? So you know what? I don’t care. I’ve been through SO much growing up. SO much. I’ve been hurt physically, and emotionally but nothing felt like this. I was taught to forgive but I can’t forgive you… i am so mad at you, Calvin. I am SO freaking mad at you because you are not sorry!”
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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kenna-haas :  
Kenna had spent the last few weeks going on alcohol binges, or spent hours on hours sleeping. Being sober was just her mind repeatedly playing the fantasy she had held onto for years of a happy ending with her parents. In her dreams, Calvin would welcome her with open arms and the two would cry tears of joy that they were finally united. Lorelai would come live with them and they would be one happy family. However; not only was that not the case, it was also far from it. Lorelai had her own demons haunting her that kept her from wanting to even see Calvin, and Calvin brushed her off then ran off. It was Kenna’s fault though. her fault for truly believing this would end in her favor. Sitting on the couch and curled up with her fleece blanket, Kenna had no intention of leaving that spot for the day. Not until she felt the presence of a familiar figure outside her door. Why wasn’t he knocking? What did he want? Why was he there? So many questions filled her mind as her curiosity grew but she still had no intention of getting up. Not until he actually did knock finally. Even so, she waited for several seconds before she actually stood up and slowly made her way to the door. “What?” She spat, standing behind the closed door and speaking through it. “What do you want, Calvin?” She mumbled.
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It was hard to look at the carbon copy of Lorelai. Actually, what made it harder was the fact he could no longer ignore the features the brunette in front of him shared with himself. How had he missed it all these years? How had he not seen the resemblance she bore to Lorelai? Maybe he did, but chose to ignore it because it was too painful to be surrounded by the thought. “Kenna.” He whispered, unsure of what he could say at this particular moment. In the back of his mind he had prepared a speech for his daughter, but now she stood in front of him and his mind became blank. It was impossible to think. His first thought was to simply fall to his knees and beg for her forgiveness, but he also didn’t want her to think him weak. Actually, she probably already thought a lot worse of him at this moment. “I don’t know.” He replied honestly, his shoulders shrugging in defeat. “I thought I had my life figured out, but now I don’t have the slightest clue what to do. I know I messed up, and I guess what I’m trying to say is I want to try and fix things.”
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The Pain Secrets Bring || Kenna & Calvin
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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Calvin || Micah
“It’s nice to know you care.” Calvin slurred as he welcomed himself into Micah’s home. His gaze shifted around the room as he slowly made his way towards the first thing he saw that could be sat on. Unfortunately, he didn’t actually make it to the chair, but instead collapsed on the rug. “I leave town and come home to discover no one cared. Speaking of caring, where the hell is that witch I’m fond of?”
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@micahsloan
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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The Pain Secrets Bring || Kenna & Calvin
It’s funny how one moment a person’s life appears to be heading in the right direction, and then suddenly an obstacle makes an appearance which destroys that perfectly structured life. One day, Calvin felt like he was on cloud nine. His relationship with a particular witch was going great and he had no worries. Sure, there were a couple of skeletons in his closet, but nothing too serious. However, when Kenna decided to tell him the truth of their relationship... It felt impossible to get back on his feet. The vampire knew he handled that situation completely wrong, and the guilt he felt over it was killing him slowly from the inside out. Lorelai making a sudden visit to New Orleans also threw a curve ball towards him. The woman he still deeply loved not being dead was a sure way to piss off a vampire who had spent too much of his life mourning the one woman he believed would never hurt him. All these things happening at once, drove the solider mad and without saying a word to anyone. He skipped town. He needed to get away from the chaos and think about how to handle the currently situation he was in. First thing, he needed to make things right with Kenna. One conversation he really was not looking forward to. 
Only being back in town for mere hours, the vampire found himself standing in front of the door leading to a all too familiar house. Several times the vampire lifted his fist to pound against the door, but each time he allowed his arm to slowly lower. Calvin was nervous to see her, his daughter, again, figuring that there was nothing he could say to beg her forgiveness. Life gave him a precious gift, and like the selfish man he was, he threw it away. Finally, after what seemed like forever, the soldier knocked on the door and took a deep breath. Hoping to be ready for whatever happened next. 
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@kenna-haas
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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lorelai-haas : 
Sitting in the far corner of the bar, when Lorelai first arrived, she was eye stalking every person who entered. She felt uncomfortable and paranoid, but she had been cooped up in her hotel room for two days, she just couldn’t take it anymore. Now, five drinks later, she was feeling a lot more relaxed. Lorelai was never a big drinker, five glasses was enough to make her feel tipsy. “Can I have another, please? Over at the bar. Oh and do you sell those salted nuts? Love those” she lifted her head up, smiling politely at the waitress. The vampire got up from her corner with her glass and walked over to the bar, taking a seat on the stool. Just as she was about to place her glass down, she smashed it in her grasp and turned her head instantly away from the voice to her right hand side. “No…” she choked quietly, the word slipping from her lips. The waitress began to fuss, but Lorelai didn’t speak, she merely waved her off and wiped the blood from her fingers. Of all the bars, in all the city, what were the chances? With her eyes screwed shut and her heart trying to climb out her mouth, she swallowed harshly. There was no way in hell she mistook that voice. Sure he had heard the commotion, she didn’t know if he would recognize her with her head turned away. Maybe she could make a great escape? Run to the toilets and Rachel Green it out the window? She cursed in her head for being so messy. That wasn’t like her. She was organised and head strong, always had been. So why was this so hard? Kenna sprung to mind, the thought of her and how he rejected her made her blood bubble with hurt and anger. Hurt her, sure, but don’t hurt her baby. With her liquid courage, she stood up, taking a deep breath she didn’t pause for thought before turning herself around, her breath catching in her throat at the sight of him. “Calvin…” Lorelai whispered, despite the fact she wanted to sound more firm. 
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@calvin-shaw
Finding himself in the bar, Calvin walked around a bit in order to make the rounds and share small conversation with other members of Marcel’s little club. The only reason the vampire found himself at the local bar, was to get complete intoxicated and then somehow find his way back home. The last thing he intended to happen was to stumble across his ex lover from decades ago. The lover which was supposed to be dead, but instead she was standing right in front him. There wasn’t enough alcohol in his system for this conversation. His emotions were too wild, but running away wasn’t an option. Besides, she was the one in the wrong, not him. “Lorelai.” He replied back in a bitter tone, his arms crossing against his chest in order to help him resist the temptation of running towards her. Even though years had passed, she was still as raidient as she had been during the war. Calvin felt his breath hitch as he continued to stare towards her. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be dead?”
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Your Ghost | Calvin & Lorelai
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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crystal-heartstrings : 
The brunette had been back home just for a couple of hours, having finally moved all of her stuffs from her old place in Baton Rouge to New Orleans. Calling up the hospital to let them know she would be back to work from the following day, Lexie settled on sending just a text to Calvin considering how late it was before she started to move all the unpacked boxes into the spare bedroom while humming an old lullaby to herself. She was almost done by the time she heard someone knocking on her door and the witch proceeded to open it slowly after throwing an apprehensive look at the clock. It was almost midnight. Kinda too late to be a friendly call– but the thought vanished no sooner than her boyfriend came tumbling through the half opened door and the brunette held him by his shoulders to steady him. “Calvin… You okay?” The brief concern in her eyes turned into a gradual smile mirroring his but whatever she was thinking of saying next was long forgotten by the second she felt his lips press against hers, completely taking her by surprise. She had missed him too while she was away but this kiss of theirs felt different from anything they had shared before. She could taste the desperate need behind it as much as she could taste the lingering alcohol and above all, she could feel the incomprehensible pain because of their physical connection. But she still let him kiss her, allowing him to draw comfort from her until the need for air finally made her pull away from him and the witch stared up into his dazed azure gaze breathlessly waiting for an explanation of some kind.
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Calvin continued to kiss the brunette until he literally couldn’t breathe, even though the act isn’t necessary for him. Slowly, he pulled back and simply gazed into the witch’s eyes. Fearing the conversation that would eventually have to happen. Part of him wished to put it off until another time, but lying to her would only make matters worse. However it went, it was very likely that this would be the last time Calvin would have the opportunity to hold the girl in his arms. Allowing their lips to touch once more, Calvin gripped her hand tightly in his, pulling her with him until they were both sitting on the nearby couch. “I’m sorry for the random visit, but my mind is both in pieces and scrambling. I just- I just don’t know what to do.” He pleaded and gripped her hand even tightly, hoping to gain some sort of comfort from her. “I’m so lost, and I fear what I have to tell you will cause me to lose you forever.”
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Need You || Calvin & Lexie
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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“Get busy living, or get busy dying.” - Shawshank Redemption
Habits:
Lets himself lose temper easily
Annoys people on purpose
Fiddles with hair
One Secret:
I wish I hadn’t found out Lorelai was alive. I had accepted her death, and now I feel lost.
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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kenna-haas :  
Kenna tensed up instantly, jerking back at the sudden and loud noises. She bit down onto her bottom lip, trying to come up with something. Anything, to say at this point but there were no words. He was right. “It- it wasn’t just my secret to tell, Calvin. It effected my mother. Okay? She didn’t want to tell you. I don’t know why exactly. I tried. For years…my whole life I wished and prayed and hoped and longed for a chance for all of us to be together. To be an actual family! Not some…story book fantasy I seemed to have created for myself. I wanted the real thing! Then, I settled. I wanted to turn because I was afraid I would die or get killed before I got a chance to even get to look into your eyes. Sure, the war may have been over but the military isn’t. The first 70 years of my life wasn’t a breeze! We were living on military bases… soviet ones for that matter. See this!?” She asked, lifting the side of her shirt, exposing the tattoo on her rib cage. “I had to get this permanently inked on my skin in order to flee Germany!” She snapped, annoyed that he thought he was kept out of the dark for no reason while they lived simple lives. “And you’re too selfish if you actually believe we spent the past 70 years of our life trying to spite you! I even watched you have a relationship with another women and I couldn’t say a damn thing because she made you happy!” She shook her head slowly. “This was probably the worst idea I ever had… I should have never left my mom. Maybe you could have continued going on about your life.” She mumbled, turning away from him and taking slow strides towards the door.
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Calvin laughed bitterly as he continued to pace around the room. Her words hitting him harder than he cared to admit, but he decided to not let his emotions show anymore. “I don’t fucking care if it was your secret or not! You should have just taken control of your own life and sought me out yourself! You were clearly able to make the decision to turn, so what made this one any different?” He asked, grabbing his bottle of whiskey to finish it. His eyes studied the tattoo carefully, and he knew exactly what it meant. He knew it was hard to leave a place that was once their home, especially when they decided to go to the Soviet Union. “Make sure you don’t show that around. It’ll get you killed if anyone knows what it means.” He muttered as he pulled his shirt down by the collar. “And since we’re showing tattoos, why don’t you have a good look at mine. Do you know what this date means? Hmm?” He asked, letting go of his shirt. “Should I thank you? Thank you, Kenna not interfering with my happiness, even though you were keeping a secret that now makes me wish that my life ended in that fucking battle instead of becoming what I am today.” He growled out. His eyes narrowed as she made her way towards the door, but he chose to not stop her. What was the point? Besides, he didn’t want her to see what would happen once she was gone from his sight.
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Sealed Secrets || Calvin & Kenna
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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kenna-haas :  
Kenna continued to just stare at him, wishing she could read his mind. “What? Do you like… hate me now?” She asked, lowering her eyes to the floor almost like she was scared of his answer. When he stood just inches in front of her, she couldn’t help but feel a slight fear. She knew Calvin long enough to see what his temper was like. She’d seen a very dark and angry side of him only those time… she wasn’t the cause, and now she easily could have been. “I uh… I couldn’t tell you. Even if I wanted to- which I would. I literally can’t. 1) because not even I know. Last time I spoke to her…like actually heard her voice was almost two weeks ago when we skyped. Then the last time I talked to her was through email and that was a week ago.” She said honestly. “2) She told me since the day I told her I wanted to come here… that I couldn’t tell you…about her. If I knew where she was… you couldn’t know.” She said, her voice softly. “It would be a risk.”
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“Hate? Never.” Calvin replied in a soft voice with a slight hint of bitterness. “I would never hate you, however, I must admit I am not in a good place at the moment. I’m furious that this was kept hidden from me for seventy fucking years!: He snapped as he moved away from her sensing she was starting to feel uncomfortable around him. “You are an adult. Your own person. You were perfectly capable of telling me, but you chose not to. That is why I’m angry. I deserved the right to know!” He shouted, picking up a nearby object and throwing it towards the wall in fury. “Two weeks? Two fucking weeks? Your mother has been alive all this time, and I am just finding out about it. I have been mourning her for years, for absolutely no reason. Just my luck. Just. My. Fucking. Luck.” He laughed harshly and paced around the room. His hands shaking due to his anger. “Oh? And what sort of risk would that be? As far as I know no one is alive from 1945 which means her little deal is no longer valid. She could have came back. She could have told me that you existed! That I had a perfect daughter who deserved to know who fucking father was! Instead, I’m left in the dark as I attempt to rebuild my pathetic excuse of a life. As the two of you just live your own lives. Too selfish to consider my feelings.”
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Sealed Secrets || Calvin & Kenna
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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Need You || Calvin & Lexie
Stumbling across the street, Calvin made his way down the familiar path towards Lexie’s home. Normally he would never impose on the witch feeling like this, but in this moment he desperately wished to see her. The conversation with Kenna had reopened wounds which were poorly closed, and he hoped the witch could make him feel at ease again. However, the vampire was also nervous as to how Lexie would take the news. Would she stand by him? Would she leave him? His eyes closed as he shuttered at the thought. Please don’t leave me. He thought to himself. Using whatever liquid courage he had left, Calvin reached up and knocked on the door a couple of times before leaning into the wood. After what seemed like forever, the door finally opened and Calvin nearly stumbled into the home, but managed to catch himself last minute. A soft smile formed on his lips at the familiar sight in front of him, and then he lunged forward. Unable to control himself, the vampire locked his lips with hers. Needing her more than ever.
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@crystal-heartstrings
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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kenna-haas :  
Kenna’s hands dropped instantly as Calvin stood up. Of course. She thought to herself. Of course it wouldn’t be this easy. She lowered her eyes onto the foot of the coffee table in front of her. Anything was better than looking at him right now. With a look of despair in his eyes which to her was completely understandable. “I don’t know.” She whispered, her voice so faint it was hardly audible. “I don’t know why I waited so long. I was scared. Okay? I didn’t even want to tell you at all. I just wanted to see who you were. What you looked like, smelt like, how you sounded, things you liked, things you didn’t like. I wanted to know who you were. Why my mother fell in love with you… because those people- the people that took her… they weren’t THAT bad. I wanted to know why she jeopardized her life for you! and you know what I found?” She asked, standing up and walking towards her. “You were worth the risk…” She spoke, soft again. “I understood why. After I met you, I did want to be your friend. You made me feel the way every girls dad should make her feel.” She placed her hands onto each side of his upper arm. “Safe.” She said, peering into his eyes that matched those of her own. “She was pregnant with me before she was taken. She wasn’t sure, and that was why she didn’t tell you. She had suspected she was but wasn’t 100 percent. Then she was taken… do you know what they did to her? They turned her. They knew about vampires. They had been doing tests and they knew about the effects of vampire blood. So she stole a vile of it. In order to protect me. She made a deal with YOUR army in order to save YOU and her. She shared Nazi secrets to the American Army. In doing so, she asked that they also put it on record that she was executed. To help you move on because part of the deal was to save you. She took the vile in order to protect herself to have me. and she did. She did a damn great job at raising me, Calvin. I wanted to turn. When I felt ready. I asked for this. I wanted to be like her, and like my father I heard so much about. She didn’t want you to know because she thought you were happy and meeting me would… I don’t know… change that.” She shrugged. “I knew at least you were safe considering anyone who presumed you dead, is dead themselves so….” She shrugged again, taking a step backwards. “I can’t make you believe me, Calvin… but you can’t think ill of me or my mom. Especially, not my mom.” She crossed her arm across her chest, swallowing deeply. “You’re telling me… I don’t look anything like you?” She frowned.
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Calvin’s eyes closed tightly as he continued to listen to Kenna’s words. His mind was still reeling with the fact that he just discovered he had a daughter with his former lover. Deep down he understood her reasoning for waiting to tell him, but it didn’t make it any easier. He wanted to accept everything she was telling him, embrace her and tell her everything was going to be okay, but that would be a lie. In truth, Calvin was furious about the situation. He never dreamed he would be this type of person to turn down the information that was just given to him by his daughter. He always hoped he would be the type to accept everything and embrace it, but no, he couldn’t be that person. “I’m glad you think that highly of me, but I don’t deserve your praise. If you knew what I was currently thinking then you wouldn’t want to be anywhere around me.” He admitted, placing his face against the cool counter. Her next words hit him harder as she explained what happened to Lorelai. This new piece of news forced his head to snap up and stare at her with wide eyes. Lorelai was turned. Lorelai made a deal with the American government to save his life. Lorelai had his daughter. Lorelai turned their daughter into a vampire. Putting these pieces together, Calvin marched right up towards the brunette and stared at her for a moment. Attempting to collect his temper before speaking, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Kenna, if everything you’re saying is true, then there’s one piece of information that you’re leaving out. Where is your mother?” He growled out, his eyes narrowed. At the moment he was completely blind to everything except to needing to know this crucial piece of information. “Please just tell me the truth.” He asked in a pleading tone, his voice breaking.
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Sealed Secrets || Calvin & Kenna
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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Bonus angle from my camera:
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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coravaldez :  
“Patience is key, my dear friend,” she smirked, taking the seat behind him. “I’ll have you know that I have my motorcycle license. Got it back in the 60s. I can probably drive this thing just as well as you.”
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“Doesn’t matter if you have a license. Just a silly piece of paper granted by a faulty government granting you the privilege to drive a fine piece of machinery. Driving one of these suckers in the war, not that’s a true test of skill.” 
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Calvin & Army
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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aria-hale-xo :  
“What can I say, those guys need a father figure in their life and Marcel isn’t it. He’s like the cool brother, you’re like the semi cool dad” she smirked, wiggling her own brows right back at him. “Anything to get my arms around you, huh? I thought you were a taken man now, Calvin?” Aria gasped teasingly as she walked towards him, getting on the bike. “I’ll be driving on the way back, show you what cool really looks like.”
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“How am I the dad, but Marcel’s the brother? What if I want to be the brother? Besides, Marcel is older than me which should automatically sort him into the category of dad.” Calvin argued, his lips pursing in thought as he wondered if everyone viewed him in this same way. “You know me all too well.” He winked, kicking the bike into gear to start moving. “We’ll have to see about that. I’m not very good with sharing.”
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Calvin & Army
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calvin-shaw-blog · 8 years
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kenna-haas : 
Kenna found herself feeling knots at the pit of her stomach, in turn causing her to drop her hands to her midsection. She couldn’t look at him in that moment. Not while he was processing her words. Impossible. When the word fell from his lips, Kenna felt the knot tighten. I knew this was a bad idea. She thought to herself.  Then suddenly, in a matter of seconds the most unexpected thing happened. He lunged towards her and pulled her into a tight embrace. One that she found herself sinking into. A soft whimper escaped her lips but it was a happy one. This was it. Everything she ever hoped for and dreamed of was happening. Her mother was right, Calvin would believe her. They could be a family again. Wrong. His next words made her tense. To not have both parents is a tragedy. What? Did he miss something. He didn’t register that Lorelai was still alive which was now going to be the hardest thing to tell him. To top it all off, she would also have to tell him that he was her father. Still scared, she wanted this moment to last a little longer. She continued to hold onto him tightly before sighing softly. “Calvin…” She whispered, pulling back a little more. “That’s…. that’s not all.” She continued. “I didn’t lose…. I didn’t lose both my parents.” She swallowed the non-existent lump in her throat. “Y-you’re…. you’re my father.” She said, tucking her hands under her lap. “She was pregnant… before she was taken…” She said, looking into his eyes while she spoke in the softest of tones, allowing him more time to truly register what it is she was saying to him. “I know this is a lot to say all at once but… why do you think I came here? why I joined Marcel’s army. I wanted to meet you. I’ve… literally heard so much about you. You were my hero before I could even talk.”
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The moment was perfect, a scene that looked like it was cut straight from a movie. The two vampires continued to embrace as Calvin processed this newfound information. Lorelai had a daughter. A daughter that had been right in front of him for years. His mind ached as he tried to piece everything together and for a brief moment he was bitter. Deep down he wished he had been able to give Lorelai a child. It was something she wanted, but was forbidden due to her status in the Third Reich. But, somehow another man was able to do what he couldn’t, his only wish was that Kenna was conceived in love and not hate. ‘You’re my father.’ The words made Kenna feel like fire and Calvin instantly removed himself from her, needing space in order to think. His mind replayed through various memories seeking some sort of truth in the statement, but none came to mind. “No.” He stated firmly, truly believing it to not be true. That was impossible. He had already been turned a vampire which meant he couldn’t sire children. It was physically impossible for Lorelai to get pregnant by being with him. Unless.. Kenna was conceived before he left for Midway. Conceived before he was killed in battle. But, then that would mean that Lorelai was pregnant with their child before she was taken away from him. The thoughts made his head hurt as he paced around the room, processing. It was possible for Kenna’s words to be truth, but extremely unlikely. During the war Calvin always took precautions in order to be sure something like this didn’t happen. Lorelai and him were supposed to be enemies, not lovers and a child would have ruined everything. 
Kenna continued to speak, and Calvin continued to pace while listening to her. Her words  then struck a particular nerve that left him whirling on her, one finger pointed in her direction. “You purposely came here for me, yet it took you years to tell me the truth? I always wondered why you followed me around like you did, but I would never have assumed this. If what you say is true, then why did it take so long? Why did you make me believe that you only wanted to be friends?” His eyes closed. “Why didn’t you fucking tell me sooner!?” He shouted before heading into the kitchen to grab another bottle of whiskey. His mind was broken, broken more than it already had been. Drinking nearly half the bottle, Calvin slammed down the glass bottle and leaned against the counter of the bar to look at her. “Lorelai probably told you were mine in order to make things easier.” His tone laced with bitterness. “I’m sorry darling, but you can’t be mine. The facts don’t add up, and Lorelai wouldn’t have done this to me.” Calvin could accept Kenna being Lorelai’s daughter, but not his.
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Sealed Secrets || Calvin & Kenna
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Sebastian Stan attends Wizard World Comic Con Philadelphia, June 4th 2016
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