bitchme-2

[bitchme-2]

[bitchme-2]

unbelievable that its 4/20 and absolutely nobody has put the objectively best rage comic on my dash yet. i have to do everything around here

[bitchme-2]

#IM SORRY??!?? #this should be a song in a musical about the critics of healthcare under capitalism #why does the beat go so hard?!? #obsessed

[bitchme-2]

lackluster is such a sick own like dude youre not even shiny at all

[bitchme-2]

I'm fascinated by how the formatting of different social media sites affect how text is read.

For instance, a line break on Tumblr indicates a new idea.

[bitchme-2]

remember in School of Rock where the black girl was afraid to say she wanted to be a singer because she was fat and didn’t want to get laughed at but Dewey was all “who gives a shit, I’m fat too and so is aretha franklin but we’re still valuable and we rock” and then the girl felt better without having to be told that beauty comes in all sizes or some other bullshit. thats the kind of body positivity I’m looking for. tell these babies that they’re worth a damn without tying it to any other arbitrary ideals

[bitchme-2]

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

[bitchme-2]

they should invent joints that don’t hurt

[bitchme-2]

kung fu panda 4 is on track to make half a billion worldwide and dreamworks is celebrating by laying off its entire animation staff to save money on future films by outsourcing and crunching the few left so their next movie is done earlier and it can be submitted to film festivals. what a rewarding industry

[bitchme-2]

I am not unaware of the negatives of Biden's presidency, and I am not trying to elide or forgive them. I'm reblogging posts about the Biden administration because I think it's really important that potential voters in the US realize that there is, in fact, a very big difference between the two parties, and voting for Biden is not just damage control--it actually does good. It's okay, you can actually feel a little excited about making meaningful progress, and not just hold your nose.

He's been very unflashy. He's not a great leader, he's not charismatic and he knows it, but he's an adroit politician and administrator, and he's been getting things done. Letting Trump win at this point would be tantamount to throwing the entire country on the bonfire. It's not a choice between bad and bad, it's a choice between meaningful, if imperfect, progress and fucking doom.

#the good stuff needs be shared more #most people i talk to think biden hasn’t done shit #this is progress

[bitchme-2]

Everyone wanted to be thicc but nobody wanted to be fat. Everyone wanted the dad bod but nobody wanted to be fat. Everyone wants fat mommy milkers but nobody wants mommy to be fat. Everyone wants to be a bear but not like, an actual fat bear. You get what i’m saying

[bitchme-2]

[bitchme-2]

When I was little my mom’s meatloaf was my favorite food. But ONLY her meatloaf. I didn’t like anyone else’s, and she told me that she would teach me how to make it when I was older. And when I was like 19? She finally taught me, but she told me never to tell anyone else and I was like weird but okay

Anyway, she was super fucking homophobic and abusive to me when I told her I was gay, so here’s the recipe

4-6 lbs of Hamburger/turkey burger

1 pk onion soup mix OR ranch mix

1 TBs ketchup

1 Tbs spicy brown mustard,

1 Tbs bbq sauce

1 Tbs steak sauce

1 egg

mix, shape into a loaf in a big pan, and bake at 350 for 2 hrs (maybe 2 and a half if you’re feeling dangerous)

You can get almost all of these ingredients at the dollar store, and have leftovers if it’s just you. The leftovers make great tacos if (taco seasoning is also like a dollar). Enjoy your revenge loaf

[bitchme-2]

liminal sex with my uncanny wife

[bitchme-2]

theyrye putting chemicals in your food that make you moan like a girl btw

[bitchme-2]

I think about this tweet all the time because they would've been SO powerful...

Like Brendan IS the lovable "oaf" superhero, and Sandra IS the no-nonsense, competitive journalist. The VISION:

#this would have been a cultural reset #how do i live in that timeline

[bitchme-2]

the cursed armor you can never take off once you put it on stays ON during sex. due to the aforementioned curse.