bees-in-a-trap

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The Mental and Emotional Side of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome.

I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome when I was 20, but years prior all my symptoms were being met with inconclusive results or being told that I should just get active and lose weight,despite having a high cardio work out every day due to drill team. It was a relief to finally have a name to give what was going on with my body, but I wasn’t relieved to hear about all the possible diseases and illnesses I could develop if I wasn’t careful and I wasn’t pleased to hear that if I was to want to have children I was going to have to seek the help of science. I was prescribed birth control pills as well as another hormone to help induce my menstrual cycle and maintain it. The side effects were awful such as extreme fatigue. The week I was on it I slept most of it away but that wasn’t as worrying as the pain shooting up my arm while on Yaz, which as some of you remember was under scrutiny because it was causing heart problems in many women. I eventually decided to change my eating habits and went vegetarian I managed to lose some weight and managed to get my acne,weight,and periods under control. As I gotten older, I realized that there is one side of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome that isn’t really talked about and that is the mental and emotional side of it. Women with PCOS know very well about the weight gain, acne, excess hair or loss of it, insulin resistance, the pain from cysts rupturing or twisting, and lack of periods. Not very many will talk about the anxiety, the rage, the mood swings,insomnia and the depression, and it’s already frustrating when people don’t believe you have something you deal with. They just think your fat, lazy, and don’t wash your body enough, but trying to have a dialogue about something that takes a toll on your mental and emotional well being is damn near impossible. Let’s add that to having a high demanding job/passion that requires late hours so you don’t have the time or energy to actually nourish your body the way you should which in terms causes everything to turn to shit. You’re exhausted, you feel horrible, you’re starting to break out, you’re brain is foggy and you really can’t understand why you are just on the edge of a break down. However, you don’t want to keep bringing up that all this is because of your disorder, because the more and more you talk about it the more it sounds like an excuse. The more and more you talk about it the more people think you are just seeking attention, the more you fear you are just a burden so you just shut up. You keep quiet and you let this storm brew inside of you until eventually all hell breaks lose. Then you are stuck trying to pick up the pieces and resolve the damage you have done and no one wants to understand. No one cares enough to listen to what was going on with you,because you should have just known better, you should have taken a step back and control yourself. Control your symptoms better. I can’t help but find that funny because no one tells people that are physically sick “Oh you should control your fever better.” “You should control your nausea better.” however it is perfectly acceptable to tell anyone dealing with a mental/emotional illness that they should be able to control their problems better. I’m tired of feeling defective and I’m tired of people treating me like I’m just making shit up. If that was the case, I’d be so much better off. Trust and Believe. I have this disorder that not only effects me physically it effects me mentally and as I’ve gotten older the symptoms have seemed to worsen and will worsen if I’m not hyper vigilant in my dietary and resting habits which tend to be disruptive if I am under a tight schedule which happens because life happens. I can only control so much and I do the best I can on my own because I’m pretty much on my own when it comes to taking care of myself. Hopefully those of you that have read this, will come to understand that dealing with something chronic is what it’s name implies. It’s chronic. It doesn’t go away. If you can ever think of a time in your life when you desperately wished someone to understand you instead of just writing you off as a nuisance,or a burden, then use that to better your understanding towards anyone that is dealing with something that effects the way they function in day to day situations. Be that one person that doesn’t make them feel completely defective. Make them feel like a person that is just doing the best they can in their given situation. It will mean the world to them.

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Being the odd one out

Even amongst the certain environments that are your home away from home...you worked hard to make a space for yourself and you are still just that odd one out. You are out of touch. You are not cool. You are a nerd trying to fit in with the cool kids. You are kidding yourself. You will never belong. You are getting old. You have absolutely nothing to show for it. No one actually likes you. They just put up with you because you are there. You will do their homework for them. You shower them with compliments. You do a lot and didn't expect anything in return except for friendship and now that has run its course. You've exhausted your services. You are done. Go away. Get out.

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Representation matters.

I took my father to see Rogue One today. I’ve wanted to take him for a while. I wanted my Mexican father, with his thick Mexican accent, to experience what it was like to see a hero in a blockbuster film, speak the way he does. And although I wasn’t sure if it was going to resonate with him, I took him anyway. When Diego Luna’s character came on screen and started speaking, my dad nudged me and said, “he has a heavy accent.” I was like, “Yup.” When the film was over and we were walking to the car, he turns to me and says, “did you notice that he had an accent?” And I said, “Yeah dad, just like yours.” Then my dad asked me if the film had made a lot of money. I told him it was the second highest grossing film of 2016 despite it only being out for 18 days in 2016 (since new year just came around). He then asked me if people liked the film, I told him that it had a huge following online and great reviews. He then asked me why Diego Luna hadn’t changed his accent and I told him that Diego has openly talked about keeping his accent and how proud he is of it. And my dad was silent for a while and then he said, “And he was a main character.” And I said, “He was.” And my dad was so happy. As we drove home he started telling me about other Mexican actors that he thinks should be in movies in America. Representation matters.

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Apparently a teen in Brazil died after jerking off 42 times without stopping. So in case you were wondering, 41 guys, that’s the limit.

Chattiest (via chattiest)

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When I bang my toe against something it’s like I pressed a button that plays all the curse words I know.

Chattiest (via chattiest)

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Eris is my kind of lady. 

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26 Of The Best Thing That Happened On International Women’s Day

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men took my little pony away from us girls so us teen girls are takin pro wrestling fuck yall just try n stop us

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Don't be that asshole

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Things I've learned within the past days.

1. No matter how old you get, if you were the kid that needed the teacher to force kids to be nice to you, guess what? You are still that kid.

2. Every time you have your period, you sit there thinking "I seriously just had you...why are you back so soon?!!" 

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The best ever!!!!

So my older brother was in a book store and picked up a book about the difficulties faced by same sex parents in society today when a woman came up and bitched him out for being “too young to be reading a book about THAT sort of people.” He saw that she was carrying the third Hunger Games Book so he stared her dead in the eyes and hissed “Prim dies.” and walked away and I have never been prouder to have him as my sibling.

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I was driving past a business here in the Houston Heights, when I glimpsed this painted on the side of the building. I recognized that iconic WWII poster before I realized it was not just any woman, but 14 year old Malala Yousafzai, the Pakistani girl who was attacked for wanting an education. The words next to her are her quote, ( “I don’t mind if I have to sit on the floor at school.) All I want is education. And I’m afraid of no one.”

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.........news flash he's still cheating >.>

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Whenever your faith in people is lost, remember these pictures.

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