beautifulduckweed

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His moves DO uncannily resemble a bird of paradise

This is what Rasputin would've wanted.

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The most relatable little guy I've ever seen in my life, especially when he gets distracted and pounces on a tumbleweed made of his own goddamn hair

this guy suuuucksss he can't catch anythingggg

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omg it's a bird slide

We have a bird playing on our skylight window.

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We have a bird playing on our skylight window.

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We bought our new sweet kitten a harness for walks. We had her try it on to get her comfortable with it and I’m not sure she loved it. 

(Source)

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Hell yeah knife salad let's gooooooooo

It's almost the Ides of March and you know what that means...

And of course, if we can get 10k votes on this, I will make the salad. Last year I didn't get to make it. Let's change that this year!

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Cats are liquids

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oh he 100% doesnt know what year it is

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Look I've written shaving kink and watched shaving porn videos for research but wouldn't have said that I have a shaving kink but goddamn this drawing has pushed me over the edge, always good to learn new things about oneself!

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt

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psychoanalyzing the gender/identity dichotomy between ice skating and ice hockey and coming to the more objectively correct conclusion that ice hockey is rooted in motherly feminine behavior of protecting the nest and that ice skating is about masculine peacocking of one's own physical prowess in seeking a mate

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What the shit what the fucking shit what the shitting fuck what the what the fuck

embroidery from peacocksandpinecones my friends and I have been losing our minds over all morning.

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“How’s your WIP going?”

"Have you made any progress?”

“How close are you to being done?”

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Had day. Now what?

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Get to Know Me Memes

Thanks for the tag, @afewbulbsshortofatanningbed! I'm procrastinating furiously, and I would absolutely so much rather do this than anything else right now.

Last Song: That Jack Harlow song except it's about chinchillas:

Favorite Color: Uhhh either hot pink, dark purple, or eye-searing teal.

Last Book: A Power Unbound by Freya Marske. This book has so many great bits, but also so many bits that were infuriating, inconsistent with established canon, broke previously established rules, or just plain made no sense, that it ended up being one of the worst books I've read in quite a while. It was at its best when it allowed the protagonists to be tender and intimate with each other, which meant that the last two chapters were the only ones that didn't make me want to thump my head gently against the wall.

Last Movie: No Time to Die. The tallwife and I decided it was time for us to finally sit down and (re)watch all five Daniel Craig Bond movies, and I gotta say, Casino Royale and Skyfall absolutely hold up---Skyfall in particular feels like a good movie, period, and the best Bond movie yet. The other three movies were entertaining but a hot mess. No Time to Die made many people furious with its ending, but I enjoyed Bond's character arc there, especially in the context of the four movies that preceded it, and especially because we'd watched the movies in rapid succession.

Last TV Show: Delicious in Dungeon, which is absolutely cuckoo bananas bonkers. Highly recommended. Anime on Netflix about a party of D&D-esque adventurers who are so broke that they have to make their way through the dungeon with zero money for provisions. The solution: cook and eat the monsters they slay! Every episode lovingly goes through the proper preparation methods and talks about the importance of eating balanced meals. If you miss original flavor Iron Chef and love D&D, you 1000% need to watch this show.

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: Savory!

Relationship Status: Le married

Last Thing I Googled: That chinchilla Tiktok

Current Obsession: Trying to slowly and painfully wrench my wardrobe around from "buy whatever's cheap and sort of fits" into something resembling a coherent aesthetic. And my true loves---romance novels in general and KJ Charles romance novels in particular---are never far from my mind.

Looking Forward To: Visiting @theglintoftherail and @etoilesombre in March, aaaaahhhh it's gonna be so great!

get to know me(me)

Three Ships: Jerry Crozier/Alec Pyne from Any Old Diamonds. Utterly obsessed with their dynamic. Kim Secretan/Will Darling from the Will Darling Adventures, because what's not to love about a twisty secretive angsty shit + stoic oblivious dude with a boatload of war trauma? Also Arthur/Eames from Inception, I will never not love that universe in general and those two in particular. Just thinking about them makes me want to reread weatherfront's Inception fics.

First Ship: Man, it was probably Todd/Neil from Dead Poets' Society? I watched that movie when I was 11 or 12 years old, and it hit me like a truck, but I had no way to express the horrible yearning I had for Neil to have a different ending, and for him and Todd to remain VERY CLOSE FRIENDS forever.

Currently Reading: King Solomon's Mines. Hilariously, am reading this for KJ Charles reasons, because Think of England is set in that universe and I want more background info on Archie Curtis's adventure-loving guncles. I enjoyed this a whole lot as a child (I think I first read it when I was 11?) and reading it as an adult is...an experience. Colonialism: What a drug!

Currently Watching: Delicious in Dungeon; also slowly catching up on Lower Decks (which is proceeding at a snail's pace because we don't have Paramount Plus, we watch an episode or two every few weeks at a friend's house).

Currently Craving: A Cosmic Crisp apple and some cheddar cheese. For whatever reason, my body has decided that This Is Food and very few other things are. Fuckin' bodies.

As always with these things, I'm not tagging anyone. Feel free to jump in if you, too, are in the mood to talk about yourself and are trying to put off actually thinking about or working on something.

#asks #memes #get to know me

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Y'all I beta'd this fic and it is amazing and everyone should read it. It is perverse and sexy and manages to nail canon voice while taking a sharp left turn from canon itself. You want some scorching sex AND to experience the unimaginable horror of having the veil of reality peeled away from your eyes to reveal the abominations roiling just underneath? This fic's got u.

So I Accidentally Wrote Tentacle Porn

You know when you read a book that you're kind of meh on, but there's one character you just can't stop thinking about? The villain in the first Whyborne & Griffin book was so delightful to me that I immediately went to AO3 to find fic for him, and... wait, nothing? Not ONE person has written fic about this smug campy hypersexual reincarnated magician who just wants to achieve immortality and also bang one of the protagonists?

So I set out to write a fic where the villain does, in fact, bang one of the protagonists. And then it kind of turned into its own thing, by which I mean a detailed portrait of that protagonist's slow Lovecraftian descent into madness and monsterfucking.

There's still villain banging too, though.

#whyborne and griffin #widdershins #lovecraftian #monsterfucking #tentacle porn #is that an eldritch abomination in your pocket or are you just happy to see me #if you've ever wanted to lightly choke whyborne then this fic is definitely for you

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Wow I didn't know beach balls could hoot like that, weird

everybody look at this fucking frog!!!!!!!