armagnac-army

[armagnac-army]

Trying to hide the brick secrets from the rest of us monsieur le roi???

i can deal with an emperor because napoleon earned that shit

I hope you earned your throne or else its real bizarre a devoted republican like you became the fucking king of snowland!!!

greetings my dear fellow !

[ places a brick Very Gently in your hands ]

do what you will with this

@france-hater

Hey you weird swede! Still cant believe you became king of sweden how the devil did that even happen????

ANYWAY

this is a fuckin brick.

Heard bout you throwing bricks at people!! Glad your not throwing a brick at me, it wouldnt do shit anyway im already made of rock and all cracked up inside but i have just un question apart from the obvious “what the fuck is wrong with you”

WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING ALL THESE BRICKS FROM

THE BRICK STORE????

#dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #france-hater

[armagnac-army]

greetings my dear fellow !

[ places a brick Very Gently in your hands ]

do what you will with this

@france-hater

Hey you weird swede! Still cant believe you became king of sweden how the devil did that even happen????

ANYWAY

this is a fuckin brick.

Heard bout you throwing bricks at people!! Glad your not throwing a brick at me, it wouldnt do shit anyway im already made of rock and all cracked up inside but i have just un question apart from the obvious “what the fuck is wrong with you”

WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING ALL THESE BRICKS FROM

THE BRICK STORE????

#dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #france-hater

[armagnac-army]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO A REAL ONE!!!

Joyeux anniversaire à un cher ami.

Today― as you lot may know― marks the 257th birthday of our Bayard, adoptive father of entire divisions, respected marshal bearing 35 wounds, and duc de Reggio...Nicolas Charles Oudinot.

A dear colleague, friend, and a man I would call my brother without hesitation― Wherever you are, Nicolas, I wish you nothing but joy and fulfilment on this special day that is rightfully yours.

With care,

L Davout.

#the marshal comments on the dashboard

[armagnac-army]

SORRY TO HEAR THAT DAVOUST!!!

DONT WORRY THO

I think well all go back to normal after a few days!

Though ney still has bloody wings weeks after he got that magical letter for some reason

Im pretty sure ill go back to my normal masculine self at least dunno about you but in my death

things just dont change for long.

SACRE BLEU

DAVOUST

YOUR SURPRISINGLY HOT!!!

-- The Duke of Montebello, @armagnac-army

...Thank you, Lannes. I feel like shit.

#dispatches from the marshal #the marshal's chance meetings #perdicinae-observer

[armagnac-army]

THATS A MOVING PICTURE

NOT AN EXPLANATION

GLAD TO SEE YOURE TAKING TO WOMANHOOD LIKE A FRENCHMAN TO BEING THE KING OF SWEDEN APPARENTLY!!!

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SWEDISH

BIENVENUE TO THIS CLUSTERFUCK OF AN AFTERLIFE AND ALSO TO BEING A WOMAN APPARENTLY THOUGH!!!!

-- The Duke of Montebello, @armagnac-army

because

& tack !

i don ' t know how i feel about having to be stuck in the afterlife with bloody davout , but this whole being a woman thing isn ' t too bad :3

#france-hater #event: the marshal is a maréchale #dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes

[armagnac-army]

Mon bestie

I love you but i am not wearing a dress because i already fucking look great in my uniform.

Lannes ! Psssst

A short woman dressed in an oversized gray coat approaches her. She is now slightly shorter than Lannes.

I really need your help i-It happened to me too now and I there is no way in hell im retiring but I’ve already told everyone else too do it .

And I also feel weird doing my usual stuff now . . . I don’t know what to do , what should i do?

- @Alexanderfanboy (Napoleon)

Fem!Lannes has a wicked grin on her face. She looks pretty much the same as regular Lannes. She tried a dress on and it was fun but she thought she looked better in her usual uniform.

Youre much shorter than me mon ami ha!

Biiiig hug as Lannes lords over her slight height advantage.

What the fuck are you on about why the devil would any of us retire??? were all goddamn dead! doesnt matter if were men or women or horses were still ourselves and were still doing our shit

just do your shit! try out a dress or something why is being a woman stopping you???

#dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #alexanderfanboy #event: the marshal is a maréchale

[armagnac-army]

Get a tailor or something!! you have someone like that right? or go ask your sister

honesty with everuyone turning into women, i dont think i need to tell anyone!

You dont have to wear a fuckin dress if you dont want to i tried one on but honestly i just looked real uncomfortable

But are you going to get on my case for wearing my uniform huh?

Lannes ! Psssst

A short woman dressed in an oversized gray coat approaches her. She is now slightly shorter than Lannes.

I really need your help i-It happened to me too now and I there is no way in hell im retiring but I’ve already told everyone else too do it .

And I also feel weird doing my usual stuff now . . . I don’t know what to do , what should i do?

- @Alexanderfanboy (Napoleon)

Fem!Lannes has a wicked grin on her face. She looks pretty much the same as regular Lannes. She tried a dress on and it was fun but she thought she looked better in her usual uniform.

Youre much shorter than me mon ami ha!

Biiiig hug as Lannes lords over her slight height advantage.

What the fuck are you on about why the devil would any of us retire??? were all goddamn dead! doesnt matter if were men or women or horses were still ourselves and were still doing our shit

just do your shit! try out a dress or something why is being a woman stopping you???

#dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #alexanderfanboy #event: the marshal is a maréchale

[armagnac-army]

Lannes ! Psssst

A short woman dressed in an oversized gray coat approaches her. She is now slightly shorter than Lannes.

I really need your help i-It happened to me too now and I there is no way in hell im retiring but I’ve already told everyone else too do it .

And I also feel weird doing my usual stuff now . . . I don’t know what to do , what should i do?

- @Alexanderfanboy (Napoleon)

Fem!Lannes has a wicked grin on her face. She looks pretty much the same as regular Lannes. She tried a dress on and it was fun but she thought she looked better in her usual uniform.

Youre much shorter than me mon ami ha!

Biiiig hug as Lannes lords over her slight height advantage.

What the fuck are you on about why the devil would any of us retire??? were all goddamn dead! doesnt matter if were men or women or horses were still ourselves and were still doing our shit

just do your shit! try out a dress or something why is being a woman stopping you???

#dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #alexanderfanboy #event: the marshal is a maréchale

[armagnac-army]

my lord i fear i must inform you that you have reblogged a post made by the general whose forces encircle my fortress. please delete it posthaste

#REGARDING CERTAIN PERSONAGES #the marshal reblogs

[armagnac-army]

ITS TIME TO RAID YOUR WIFES ARMOIRE FOR SHIT

IM STILL KEEPING MY SWORD ON ME THOUGH

IT IS

THE BEST ACCESSORY

LANNES LANNES LANNES

A very tall woman with long curly black hair, legs for miles, and one hell of a drop-dead curvy figure is waving at Lannes. And, oh, yeah, the boobs. Right in Lannes' eye level.

LOOK AT ME AREN'T I SEXY AND GORGEOUS WELL EVEN MORE SO BUT YEAH

-- @your-dandy-king

Lannes is looking. Look it's right in her face where else is she expected to look. She does look kinda the same, but her voice gives away what's happened to her too. Though it is still loud. Many things never change.

MON AMI

YOU WERE ALWAYS SEXY AND GORGEOUS!!!!

HOLY FUCK THOUGH YOU COULD KNOCK A MAN OVER WITH THOSE THINGS

#dispatches from the marshal #the marshal's chance meetings

[armagnac-army]

LANNES LANNES LANNES

A very tall woman with long curly black hair, legs for miles, and one hell of a drop-dead curvy figure is waving at Lannes. And, oh, yeah, the boobs. Right in Lannes' eye level.

LOOK AT ME AREN'T I SEXY AND GORGEOUS WELL EVEN MORE SO BUT YEAH

-- @your-dandy-king

Lannes is looking. Look it's right in her face where else is she expected to look. She does look kinda the same, but her voice gives away what's happened to her too. Though it is still loud. Many things never change.

MON AMI

YOU WERE ALWAYS SEXY AND GORGEOUS!!!!

HOLY FUCK THOUGH YOU COULD KNOCK A MAN OVER WITH THOSE THINGS

#your-dandy-king #dispatches from the marshal #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #event: the marshal is a maréchale

[armagnac-army]

🪄This letter turns you into the opposite gender, and will wear off in whatever way you see fit!🪄

HUH

FEMME NOW

Ill miss mon membre but honesty doesnt seem like much of a change otherwise!!!

wonder what id look like in a dress?

Yeah, fem!Lannes honestly doesn't look that different from normal masc!Lannes. Perhaps she is serving some "butch realness".

#event: the marshal is a maréchale #letters intercepted for the marshal's eyes #anonymous #dispatches from the marshal #magical anons

[armagnac-army]

SO SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAD FUN CHASING AFTER LIL ME HA!

Subervie: Heh, Lannes, it did warm the heart watching you get into trouble like the good ol' days. Almost made me wish I was down there with ya, getting up to mischief like in old Lectoure.

WELL SOMEBODY HAS TO BE THE ADULT AROUDNM HERE

NOW WHAT THE FUCK DID I MISS

#dispatches from the marshal #dispatches from adc subervie

[armagnac-army]

Idunnowhatakirbyis

but

butbutbutbut

i bet kirby isnt as cool

asCHARLEMAGNEandhisPALADINS

ASTOLFO WENT TO THE MOON!!!!

ON A HIPPOFRIGG

An 8 year old Lannes (of @armagnac-army) is going to wander to where Helene is being looked after by Louise.

Lannes: Bonjourbabyyouarereallycutecanisayhellotothebabymadam?

Just as Louise is about to respond, a man dressed in the uniform of a general is going to approach her and talk to her. Seems like he's explaining what the deal is with lil kiddo Lannes. Adults are distracted. Perfect time to poke Helene's cheek.

Awu?

Helene would stare at Lannes, as he poked her cheek. She then would take hold of her Kirby plushy, looking at Lannes with a shy yet curious look.

Me... Me Helene...! Do wo wike Kiwby?

#(( i typoed hippogriff and then i left it )) #event: the marshal is 8 #dispatches from the marshal #the marshal's chance meetings

[armagnac-army]

When Larrey gets Subervie, Subervie is going to be pretty grateful.

Subervie: Thank y'all so much! The lil rascal keeps running off- well, should be used to that, he does still do that even as my commandin' officer- but as as kid I gotta take care of him, you know?

I can take care of myself monsieur subervie!!

Subervie: Sure you can, cabbage. Right, time to get you back home. Adieu- uh, Your Majesty, Baron, Mademoiselle!

An 8 year old Lannes (of @armagnac-army) wanders up to you. And then says this in one breath.

Hitherewhatsyournamemynameisjeanlannesidontknowwheremyfamilyisbutsuberviekeepstellingmetheyrefineandproudofmeidontknowwhyhesaysthatyourpretty.

Uhhhh, hello, Lannes. @trauma-and-truffles , we have a problem

#event: the marshal is 8 #dispatches from adc subervie #dispatches from the marshal #the marshal's chance meetings

[armagnac-army]

Hehehe ive been exploring! and playing hide and seek with subervie

i miss my family but subervie says that ill see them again soon and hesjuslookingaftermefornowso thats fine!!!

nicetomeetyoumonsieursbonaparteandjunot

im going to go now byeeeee

Yeah, little Lannes is also going to leave because he does not have a great attention span. And he is also not going to free you. Sorry.

An eight year old Lannes wanders in to where @general-junot is tied to Napoleon. He has completely forgotten about any of this.

why are you two tied up? are you playing a game?

ohohohareyoutwoactuallycriminalsandyouvebeentiedupforyourowngood?

((Napoleon does not recognize it to be Lannes and just thinks it’s a cute child dressed as Lannes))

((If someone else had said it he would have given a snarky remark but he loves children))

Oh my goodness, aren’t you just the sweetest little thing

We will be fine, but what are you doing here all alone ? Are you lost ?

I know you are dressed as a brave and strong marshal but you my friend are still just a child and this place is not safe

#event: the marshal is 8 #dispatches from the marshal #the marshal's chance meetings

[armagnac-army]

Bonjourmonsieurcatto! sorryforpullingyourtail

The cat just continues licking himself all over.

And bonjourmonsieurmichel! I like your hair.

Monsieurbrunsaidhewasgoingtogivemeapresentsoimgoing togo find him bye Monsieur Michel!

Subervie: Nice to see you, Monsieur Le Maréchal, young as you look. Served in your corps a few times after I left Lannes’ staff. Speaking of, I’m hoping that Lannes will grow up soon - cute as a button but won’t stop running off. Now if you’d excuse me.

8 year old Lannes (of @armagnac-army) wanders past and goes,

YOUR HAIR IS REALLY RED

*sighs, of course it is, will he call me carrots now?* Oh hello, little one.

Are you lost? Should I help you to find your mom or dad?

#event: the marshal is 8 #dispatches from the marshal #the marshal's chance meetings #dispatches from adc subervie