anti-sillified

[anti-sillified]

Me before saying the worst and stupidest thing of my life: this is self care

[anti-sillified]

Based off this silly post below haha, I had to

[anti-sillified]

It's so funny to me that I started attending therapy in 6th grade for "irrational financial anxieties, fear of homelessness, fear of money" and they essentially told me 'man don't worry about that you're a kid' fuck you maybe if I'd stayed worrying about it I wouldn't be 402 fuckin dollars short for rent ALICE

#im so poor

[anti-sillified]

Crying wanting to kms over something and it gets resolved.... and 2 days later my card declines for taco bell and I've gotta pay rent late <3 luv when renters insurance and gas and food and health insurance and cat food and clothing and bus money and car insurance and unskippable 30 second ads and coffee costs 8 dollars for a medium and working with children knowing youre teaching them to cope with the same dysfunctional future you are drowning in and work meetings that are a 45 min drive away and mandatory days off [without pay] and kitty litter and cleaning supplies and Christmas presents and all that Jazz 3.4 days after paying rent

#excerpts from my journal #i want to fucking die #fr #does anyone know if this shit is actually survivable for the average autistic with clinical depression #because if i do not have a chance anyway id prefer to go on my own terms

[anti-sillified]

Dog I wanna end my shit

#excerpts from my journal

[anti-sillified]

"I am so sad. I want to make pretty soaps when I get off work, and wrapped them in sheer glittery bags with tiny notes for the people I love."

#excerpts from my journal

[anti-sillified]

"I want a relationship like _____ and _____'s.

Where I am worshipped for existing, and I bow at your feet with a glance. Where I am enough to nourish you, where my branches can grow into roots, curling around you and keeping us both safe from storms.

I am unhappy with who I am."

#excerpts from my journal

[anti-sillified]

why is it that 90% of criticism of the song of achilles just boils down to not accepting the conventions of romance as a genre and wanting it to simply be a different book than what it is? because seriously if you can’t get with the fact that the song of achilles is a queer romance story first and a retelling of the iliad second you’re never gonna make a criticism of it that’s interesting to me. if i wanted to read a book that was accurate to the source material then i would just read the iliad. if i wanted to read a queer romance unfolding on the backdrop of a mythical war i would read the song of achilles. if you dont understand the difference between those two things then your beef with that book is just a waste of time to me

[anti-sillified]

the mountain goats make music for people who spent their entire lives convinced they would die before they were 17 except now they're 26 and they have a job and friends and hobbies and they're not sure what they're meant to do now that they've survived

[anti-sillified]

Something died between us, and I'm not sure what it is. But I'll be mourning for a long time

[anti-sillified]

Can I please skip the dating apps and just imprint on you like a baby bird and never leave your side

[anti-sillified]

Is it still polyarmory if I want to tear my heart out

[anti-sillified]

Freak moment when you need to stop. You need to Stop thinking right now or you'll cry at work and you're too BROKE to lose this job