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I miss the way I looked a year ago when I was starving and walking 6 miles every day, working double shifts 4 times a week, working out every day and using drugs to cope and lose weight.

I'm happy to be sober, I'm happy to be home with my daughter instead of working but I am very much not happy with my body.

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You deserve more than fair-weather “friends”, there only when fortune seems to be smiling on you then gone with the wind when the storm clouds come in.

You deserve more than those who act like they are doing a big favor by sticking around in the worst times, holding it over your head like you owe them for life.

You deserve more than second chances to right wrongs that turn into so many, you lost count several chances back.

You deserve more than people who only come calling when they want something from you, or other plans fall through, or they seek to confirm some secondhand news.

You deserve more than your feelings invalidated at every turn, or the blame turned around on you for something they do, or to be turned on ferociously for daring to disagree.

Unless you serve it to others, you deserve much more than hate, mistreatment, pettiness and bitterness. Unfortunately, it’s not just the ones who habitually dish such toxicity out who get it in return…if only, right? But if you treat others with care, care enough for yourself not to settle for the misanthropic misery not meant for you.

We Deserve More

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I think we need to hear kind things more often. I think they should drip off the tongue freely. kindness is not a finite resource. I think all of us understand the importance of saying “I love you”, but we should also be more free with hugs. With smiles, With saying “I’m proud of you,” or “you did a good job.” Thank you. I’m grateful for everything you do. I am blessed to have you in my life. These are not things we should be saving to say at funerals. We should be saying it while people are still here. Let people know you care about them. Smile. Be kind. The world isn’t always kind, and that’s why it’s our job to change it.

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Comfy clothes thinspo✨

Remember to be safe lovelies💞

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slow progress is still progress nonetheless. you are still creating change in your life and you are still doing your best. slow and steady wins the race, except this isn’t a race and the other people win too. everyone wins in the end regardless of what point in your journey you are at. you win because you are attempting change, you are making progress no matter how slow. you win because you are getting better.

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When you start falling for someone and it triggers ur ED so you can be skinny so that they’ll find u attractive - big fucking mood

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an eating disorder but every time someone offers you food it gets worse

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Thing I wish I knew

° It’s a known fact you’ll always be cold. But not how cold. I can take a hot shower and lie under two blankets and still be cold to the bone.

° You’ll get weak. I’ve always been weak in my arms but right now I can’t even carry a chair without my muscles aching.

° My back hurts. All the time. My knees do too, I feel like I’ve aged 4 years in the span of 1.

° Don’t listen to sweetspo. You won’t look in the mirror at your goal weight and be skinny. You just won’t see it. I’ve lost 5kg and don’t see a difference.

° You won’t be proud when someone worries about your food. You will be defensive and angry and grumpy. You don’t want them to know.

° You’ll feel guilty. About eating too much and doing too little. But most of all keeping a huge secret from anyone who cares about you.

° You can’t concentrate on anything else than food.

° Are you depressed and anxious??? Great! It’ll increase.

° It won’t ever be enough.

° I can’t stop. I can’t.

° You’ll freak out about fun things. About normal things. Christmas, eating dinner with friends, going out.

° Please get help if you can. Please get out while you can. This is not a friend of yours.

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5:33 am

i want to be addicted to starving

in one month and a half i can be 105 lb

imagine announcing that cw so proudly?

i want to be the best at eating less or nothing

i want to be so light and angelic

carry me, envy me, admire and adore me

[this is always what i wish for. every night, it comes down to this. it doesn’t matter what food i wanted or consumed before. this long term goal beats everything]

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Drink. The. Damn. Water.

Restricting. Liquids. Is. Not. Worth. The. Risk.

You will not get fat from water. I promise.

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Couple thinspo.

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thinspo xo

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🌸Pink Thinspo🌸